author notes: hey all! just want to give you a heads up that I'm not gonna get a chance to update for a few weeks because my AP exams are kicking my ass all over the place. But after that, expect plenty of new stories.

disclaimer: wish I owned, but alas, I do not. Title belongs to the Danger Flowers.

timeline: post-Chosen.

All Over Me

I'm awake again. Staring at the ceiling and counting the cracks. You would think that after finally having a room all to myself I would sleep like a baby. But I can't. She's not here.

Sometimes she looks at me like I'm the only one in the room, in the world. Sometimes she smiles at me and links her pinky with mine when no one is looking. Sometimes she brings me a flower or my favorite ice cream 'just because.'

Sometimes she has nightmares and she lets me hold her until she stops shaking.

Sometimes she lets me see her cry. Sometimes she tells me why she cries. Most of the time she doesn't.

Other times she won't even talk to me. She leaves for days at a time. She gets drunk and kisses other people when she knows I can see her. Brings them home and fucks them in the room right next to mine.

She lets me get so close and then she pushes me as far away as she can. It hurts so much, but I can't stop wanting this. Wanting her. She knows she's all over me.

She's scared. And who can blame her? The first time around was so fast and intense and went to hell all too fast. Our angsty, teenage love ended like most do, with broken hearts and bittersweet memories.

Only ours had a body count.

I hear the doorknob turn slowly and the light from the hall spills onto the carpet before the door shuts quietly. She pads across the carpet and stops in the center of the room.

"B? You awake?"

She knows I am. She can feel me.

"Yeah." My voice sounds thick and scratchy.

I feel the mattress sink and I pull myself up to a sitting position. She looks over at me, the moonlight catching her eyes, and the shadows playing with her features. She opens her mouth, and closes it again.

Please say something. Anything.

She sighs and pulls her knees up to her chest and wraps her arms around them, closing her eyes. I feel my chest constrict as she shuts me out again.

I crawl across the bed to where she is and pull her arms away and push her knees apart gently. She lets them fall limply and stretches her legs out around me. I settle between them and wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her close as I can.

I feel her heartbeat thudding harder and harder, and she rests her forehead on my shoulder, her arms winding themselves around my neck.

"I'm trying to be good, B… I-I'm trying to play nice, and be your friend. And I-I can't. Do this…I'm…Just stop, okay? Please. I'm falling all over the place for ya, and I can't do this again."

"It can be different this time."

I can feel her warm breath on my shoulder and my hands slip under the hem of her shirt, my fingers running up and down the bumps of her spine. I need to feel her.

"What if isn't? What if all goes to shit like everything else in my life? Do I go all psycho-Slayer again?"

"You're not that person anymore…"

"Yeah? You think I'm so damn stable now, don't ya? But newsflash, B, I'm still fucked up in more ways than you can count! I'll screw this up…I'll hurt you like I always do."

She's angry and pulling away, but I hold her tighter, closing my eyes and clenching my jaw, swallowing the lump rising in my throat.

"Just give us chance, Faith. Please?" My voice cracks.

"Buffy…" I can feel her anger draining just as quickly as it came, and her resolve weakening.

She stops struggling in my arms and her body relaxes into mine. Her hands rest gently at my waist and she turns her head, burying her face in my neck.

I feel her lips press softly to my collarbone. The breath hitches in my throat, and my hands stop their descent just below her shoulder blades. She pushes her lips against my skin again, and she begins trailing kisses up my neck and along my jawbone. Her teeth graze my ear lobe and I begin to tug at the hem of her tank top.

She stops her assault on my ear, and lifts her arms, allowing me to pull the top over her head. Her dark locks fall messily around her flushed cheeks and onto bare shoulders. She looks so young right now.

She keeps her eyes closed and rests her cheek against mine. I feel her chest rising and falling quickly, and I turn my head, nudging her nose with mine.

"It's okay." I say, willing her to believe me.

I run my fingers through her hair and push my lips against hers for the first time.

It feels like falling.