Disclaimer: Don't Own

Author's Note: This chapter is where the real story begins, this will probably lose me some readers, but it's a genre I really wanted to try writing and I liked the new character as an idea. If you don't like it than you can stop reading, but this is just the crazy thing going on in my head.

Chapter 4

"Everyone," Carla shouted, all of the nurses and doctors on the floor turned around to listen. "I would like you all to introduce yourselves to our newest nurse, Lance Prowess."

He looked like he had stepped straight from a "Lord of the Rings" film. He was tall with a slender build and had straight blonde hair that was tied at the base of his neck. He was a little pale but had a very healthy to him. I was amazed by how uninterested our female staff was.

"Was that Susan's ex?" I heard Nurse Tisdell ask. Another nurse nodded and the two glared. "I heard that jack ass dumped her the night she was going to put out. No reason at all."

I could think of one, Susan was a slutty nurse down in the OR, which would've been sexy if she weren't such a sight for sore eyes.

The nurses gave some unenthusiastic waves and "hello's" before returning to work. The new guy looked slightly disheartened by it and went to talk to Carla. She pointed over in my direction and I waved, assuming she was introducing me.

"Newbie!" I heard Dr. Cox whistle. I quickly ran to his call. "Now I know you're busy staring at what will probably be the source of your wet dreams this week, but you have work to do. Do you hear me? Work."

I nodded along, ignoring everything he said.

"Now why don't you go over to Mrs. Portman and get her prepped for that blood transfusion later today, think you're capable of that?"

"Sir, yes, sir." I said sarcastically, walking off.

I was taking notes in her chart when the new guy came over.

"Thought I'd introduce myself, I'm Lance," he said holding his hand out. I shook it.

"JD," he nodded.

"Yeah, Carla told me. So does everyone get such a warm welcome or am I just special?" I laughed.

"Nah, it's just people who won't sleep with slutty Susan." I saw him mouth her name before it finally dawned on him.

"Oh," he said with the hint of a shudder.

"Yeah, I don't blame you for dodging that bullet." He laughed and took the completed chart from me.

"Well, I'm glad I've met someone here who'll be civil to me," he said. I felt bad for him. Being new can be pretty hard.

"No big deal, man." I said. He turned to walk off with the chart adn I had an idea. "Hey Lance!"

"Yeah?" He said, turning around.

"You wanna grab a beer tonight?" He smiled and thumbs-upped me. I was glad I could help. Everyone needs a friend.

"So," Dr. Cox said as I walked into the room. "I'm not sure if I should be excited or disgusted by the rumors of your upcoming man date. On the one hand, this proves that I have in fact been right all along, but on the other everyone will have to get used to calling you JP when you drop Dorian in favor of the oh-so-gayer Prowess. I, however, will continue calling you by, let's try, Lucy. Partly because it sounds so close to your precious Lance and partly because it sounds like Lucifer, a nickname you'll surely get when the Christian Coalition hears about this."

"You mean your sister?" I said, ignoring the man date jibe.

"Who else? Keep up kid."

While Dr. Cox continued to rant I trailed off towards Carla, knowing full well that I wouldn't be missed for awhile.

"Thanks for helping Lance adjust JD," she said and I waved my hand.

"It's no problem at all, in fact, helping others is in my job description." I flashed my name tag at her.

"Bambi, I told you not to mess with my glitter pens."

"But it's so pretty..." I said, staring into it. "Man, I gotta go, Dr. Cox must be nearing the end of this rant."

"I still can't wrap my mind around this," I said, sipping my appletini. "How can anyone stand to date Susan, even if it is just for a week."

Lance laughed. "It's my words of wisdom: You can drink anyone pretty." I raised an eyebrow skeptically. "It's true, point at someone and I'll tell you how many it would take."

I pointed to what was either a really ugly girl or a very pathetic transvestite. Lance looked deep in thought. "I weould say 6 or 7, I don't lower my standards that much."

I pointed across the bar at an older woman. "Four, that's just because she seems like she knows a few tricks. Come on, JD, give me a challenge."

"This is hard for me," I confessed. "I'm such a light weight that everyone in here is a three."

"Okay, no more game. Let's get another round over here!" He motioned to the bartender. "So, tell me about yourself."

I woke up the next morning without the usual shakes and crafts. Instead I had a hangover and some black spots in my memories.

"Ungh..." I moaned, rolling from the bed. I placed one hand on my head and the other on my bare legs. Something wasn't right about this picture. This wasn't my room. This wasn't my bed. This was not where I remembered going last night.

I quietly rolled off and pulled my jeans up, hoping whoever was next to me wouldn't wake up. I walked towards the door and a board creaked. Something sat up behind me.

"JD?" came a voice. I turned around and saw Lance sitting up in the bed.

You can drink anyone pretty...

Author's Note: Told you it would get weird. Hope you enjoyed!