AN: I would like to thank everyone who took the time to write a kind review to me! Keep them coming, they really give me motivation to write more! You may have noticed, I've created my own version of events that have happened and what I'm writing isn't linear in the least, but I hope it is still enjoyable! As always, I am just borrowing the characters from JKR, she gets to take them home when I'm done. ;)

The Hospital Wing.

Nymphadora Tonks woke up in an empty white room. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she looked around, wondering where she was. The bed she was lying on had white sheets, and a button that raised it. She realized that she must be in St. Mungo's. She tried to fully sit up, but the pain became too much. Her head was throbbing, and she felt that she had a bandage wrapped around it. The room was empty, and completely silent, she could not even hear the footsteps outside her room. Tonks' mind was wandering, she had so many questions to ask the Order members. What had happened to Harry? Is the prophecy okay? Did we lose anyone? How many Death Eaters were captured? Has Fudge finally admitted that You Know Who is back? The question laying most heavily on her mind was whether Remus Lupin survived unscathed.

Tonks had been in love with Lupin since pretty much the day she met him. He was kind, gentle, fair, strong…intelligent and not to mention dreamy, sexy….Tonks felt herself falling into a trance. She had never told him how she felt for him, she was too scared he would turn her down. Remus never seemed interested in women, Sirius always told her it was because of his Lycanthropy. That was a non-issue for Tonks, she was an auror and thus capable of handling a fuzzy little werewolf. Closing her eyes, Tonks found herself wondering is Remus was a virgin or not…

Tonks heard footsteps was immediately pulled herself out of her fantasy. She turned to the door and saw Remus. She smiled, and was euphoric when he returned the smile. Lupin sat down in the chair beside her bed.

"Nymphadora, you're awake. Everyone in the Order was so worried, you took quite a nasty hit from Bellatrix. You've been unconscious for a day and a half, but now that you're awake you should be able to leave quite soon. Which is a good thing, since Harry will be leaving school in a few days and I'm sure you will want to be there to meet his Aunt and Uncle…I know that was something you always joked about. We'd have hated to have to meet them without you." Remus gave a slight laugh, feeling almost forced, as if he were trying to be cheerful for Tonks' sake.

"Remus, don't call me Nymphadora! I curse my brain-addled Mother everyday for naming me it."

"I'm sorry Tonks. It just slipped out, the formality of the occasion and all." Lupin looked uncomfortable.

"What is so formal? I was laying between life and death for a day and a half, I'm awake now, all is good and jolly right?"

Remus spoke softly, "No…Tonks…I'm really sorry to be the one to tell you but…Sirius died. Bellatrix killed him. There was nothing anyone could do, I'm so sorry."

Tears welled up in Tonks' eyes. "Are you saying my cousin, the last good member of the Black family is…dead?"

"Yes, Tonks I'm so sorry."

Tonks burst into desperate sobs. Lupin looked alarmed, and begged her to calm down, saying that she would tire herself out.

"Oh Remus, I'm so sorry, I know he was your best friend! Oh Remus…hold me!" Tonks cried.

Remus felt extremely uncomfortable now. "Tonks, the healers could come in, me holding you…it wouldn't look right…I'm sorry." Remus felt tears welling up in his eyes and looked down to keep her from seeing them.

"Remus please! I need you! It's all my fault, I was dueling Bellatrix and I was too weak…oh Sirius, I killed you!"

Lupin could not take any more of Tonks' blaming, and crawled into bed with her. He held her between his legs, and she lay her back against his chest. He pulled her close to him and awkwardly tried to soothe her. Tears were now openly flowing out of Lupin's eyes, and he did not bother to try to stifle them any longer. They lay like that a long time, until eventually Tonks turned to her side and rested her head on his shoulder. It was now silent once more. She realized this was her perfect time to tell him how she felt. Taking a deep breathe, she decided to go for it.

"Remus…I need to tell you something."

"Yes Tonks?"

"I love you. I have loved you since the day I met you." Lupin's grasp on Tonks' loosened to the point where she was just lying between his legs. "I know you probably aren't expecting this but I've been too scared to tell you. But with Sirius gone…any one of us could be next. Remus, I want us to be together, please…tell me you feel the same way."

Lupin climbed off the bed, which Tonks took as a bad sign. She looked down and her hands, and refused to look into his eyes. Lupin did the same thing.

"Tonks, I care for you very much as a friend. You are kind, and generous and just so beautiful, I have no doubt you'll make another wizard very happy some day. I can't be that wizard. I am a werewolf, once a month I become dangerous. I could kill you. I cannot provide for you, I cannot even provide for myself, I would be too ashamed of that fact, that I can't even take care of my own wife. And the age difference…you are much too young for me. You would be much happier with a man your own age. What about Bill or Charlie Weasley? They seem like pleasant young men and are much more deserving of your affections than I am."

"Don't be stupid Remus. Bill is in love with Fleur, and even if he wasn't, I don't want either of them. I want YOU! I know you are a werewolf, I am an auror remember? I can take care of a werewolf no problem, even if you forget to take your potion. And I make enough money as an auror to take care of us, you could concentrate on business within the Order…"

"The Order isn't going to last forever, Harry will defeat Voldemort…"

"…let me finish Remus. My point is, you don't need to work for us to be happy together. I don't care about money, I only care about you! I would live in a box if it meant I were with you! And the age difference, that's nothing. Why does everyone care so much about age anyway? I love you Remus and you must love me, I've seen the way you look at me. Please don't deny it, Remus, please…"

"You don't love me Tonks. It's just a crush, you're going through a phase. You will meet another man and I will be forgotten. Please forget about me Tonks, us, it will never happen."

"Is that what you really believe Remus?" Tonks asked sharply.

"Yes, you're a young woman, inexperienced with the ways of love. You will get over me."

"Oh yeah? Get out Remus. Leave me alone."

"Tonks, I'm sorry, you must be angry…"

"You think?" Tonks got out of bed and stood in front of him with her hands on her hips. Lupin gently put his hand on her elbow in an attempt to guide her back to bed.

"Get your hands off of me!" Tonks grabbed his hand, and threw it off her. "I don't need you Remus. I love you and I always will but why can't you see that? Why can't you accept my love? Remus, leave me alone. Go away and just leave me with my thoughts."

"Tonks, I'm sorry…we can still be friends, just not lovers." Lupin spoke gently.

"Whatever. Remus, leave now."

Lupin walked out of the door and closed it softly behind him. Inside, Tonks cried bitterly on the bed.

Once she was released, her and Lupin acted as if nothing had happened between them, but it tore her up inside to pretend. Once she saw Harry off, returned to Grimmauld place, into a guest bedroom, where she cried some more. When she left, she bumped into Lupin.

"Hey, Tonks, your hair is wavy and a brown colour. It's looks quite nice on you."

"Oh? My hair must have changed colour…thanks…just something I am um…trying out for awhile."

"Well…I think it looks…nice on you." Lupin struggled for words awkwardly.

"Is there a meeting tonight Remus?"

"Yes, seven-thirty, followed by dinner afterwards. Are you staying for dinner?"

"I suppose so. Not like I have anything better to do."

"Ah, well I'll see you then. I have to run out to do some errands." Lupin walked away without another word, but turned around a flashed a smile.

"Oh Remus…I love you…please change your mind some day." Tonks whispered to herself.