Chapter Seventeen: The ER
I regained consciousness as Blue Eyes helped to shove my stretcher into the back of the ambulance. "Mother?" I whispered.
"Shhhh," he answered. "As soon as we leave for the ER, the waiter is going to take Genghis a note."
"Oh my god, you didn't tell her I died, did you?" I grabbed his arm.
The EMTs closed the doors on us and the ambulance started. "No, Tiger, but I wish I'd thought of it." He was taking my pulse. "Hand me your stethoscope," be barked to one of the techs. He listened to my heart. I started to speak, but he shushed me. Finally, he nodded at the techs and allowed them to start the IV.
"Blue Eyes, there's nothing wrong with me but acute shock."
"Eleanor Ramilly, I strongly suspect you're anemic and, probably, low in B vitamins, most likely B6. We'll get you to the ER and run a couple of tests," he told me in his professional, doctorly voice.
"What did you tell Mother in the note?"
His lips turned up slightly at the corners. "That you had been taken ill and were being transported to the PPTH ER, that I was accompanying you in the ambulance, and that she could take a cab if she wanted."
I smiled weakly. A fleeting look of concern crossed his face. "We're almost there, Eleanor Ramilly."
"The birth certificate," I started.
"Hush. We'll discuss it later."
"But."
"Later."
The techs moved me into the chaotic world of the ER. Blue Eyes barked and bellowed without much success until Dr. Chase appeared and had me moved to a bed surrounded by flimsy curtains.
"Chase," Blue Eyes begin immediately, "get a CBC, MVC, hematocrit, ferritin, and a vitamin test profile, looking particularly at B6 and B12."
"You're thinking anemia and B deficiency? What happened?" Dr. Chase asked.
"She fainted after a he!! of a great lunch." He sat on a chair against the wall.
Dr. Chase grabbed the necessary hardware and approached me with a long needle.
"How do you feel now, Audra?"
"I'm fine, Dr. Chase. I just had a bit of a shock at lunch. That was all."
"It won't hurt to run some tests to make sure," he reassured in his lovely, Australian accent as a lock of his blonde hair slipped forward across his eye. I didn't feel the needle enter my arm at all.
"Call Cameron," Blue Eyes said. "Have her run the tests while we wait."
Dr. Chase looked up. "It would be better if you called her, House. I'm not her boss."
"Ahh, you two still on the outs." Blue Eyes paged Allison.
The curtains surrounding my bed parted and Mother stood in the opening, poised as a model, her hips angled, her shoulders back, her head high. Blue Eyes was sheltered from her view by the curtains, but Dr. Chase was standing right before her. Mother put on her sultry smile and slinked forward with her hand extended.
"You must be Audra's doctor. I am Imogene Jeffrey," she oozed in a honeyed version of her normal haughty accent.
"I'm pleased to meet you, Mrs. Jeffrey, but . . ." Dr. Chase stuttered, uncomfortable.
"Honey, if you're going to be looking after my darling daughter, you must call me Imogene. What is wrong with her? Food poisoning from that horrible restaurant?"
Blue Eyes had a sly smile on his face as he kept quiet. I just closed my eyes and felt guilty about leaving Dr. Chase in my mother's flirtatious hands.
Allison hurried in. "What? Who paged me? Chase?"
Chase indicated Blue Eyes against the wall, who waved cheerily to Mother.
"I need you to run some tests on Audra, Cameron," he said.
She gave Blue Eyes an angry glance. "Chase can't do it?"
"Not right now, Cameron. He's busy. Go," Blue Eyes sternly directed her.
Allison took the blood and the list of tests, huffily marching into the hall.
"That young woman needs to learn some manners," Mother said in a slow, expressionless drawl.
Chase jumped to her defense. "She was probably busy. There was no reason I couldn't have run those tests."
"Dear boy," Mother continued, "you're needed here. Dr. House, obviously, has had too much wine at lunch to be able to adequately care for dear Audra. And, certainly, he wouldn't have called you in if you weren't the most highly qualified doctor in this little hospital." She smiled her seductive smile again.
"I am not drunk," Blue Eyes complained from his seat.
"Dr. Chase, do you think you could find me a chair? I'm sure Dr. House is too unsteady to surrender his to a lady."
Dr. Chase scurried into another cubicle and came back with a chair, which he held as my mother delicately lowered herself into it.
"Thank you, Dr. Chase," she cooed.
"Mother, there's no reason for you to stay here with me. Don't you need to get ready to catch your plane?" I asked with undisguised annoyance.
Dr. Chase stood nearby, obviously unaware if he should go or stay, and Blue Eyes refused to give him a sign either way.
"The questions I came here to answer have only created more questions, Audra," Mother said pointedly. She reached out and wrapped her long fingers loosely around Dr. Chase's forearm. "Dr. Chase, have you seen Audra's baby?"
"Yes, Mrs., uh, Imogene, I'm an intensivist, so I've spent a good bit of time taking care of her. She's a hearty little girl to have been born so early." He smiled to my Mother in what he thought would be an encouraging way.
"Well, Dr. Chase, let me ask you another question. Do you feel that the parents of a baby should be married, that they should try to raise a child in an intact home as a family?"
Dr. Chase, no longer understanding the purpose of Mother's questions, looked to me for help. Blue Eyes continued watching Dr. Chase's discomfort with amusement.
"Obviously, under the best of circumstances, a home with a mother and a father and their children would be preferable; however, in today's world that's not always possible."
"Audra," Mother said with the slightest tinkling of a laugh, "dear Dr. Chase, here, is a diplomat." She turned her attention back to Dr. Chase. "I recognize your accent as Australian, but you must have some southern ancestry." She laughed girlishly again.
Blue Eyes' patience had come to an end. He stood and limped over to perch on the end of my bed. "Imogene, when did you say your plane was leaving tonight?"
"I never said I was leaving tonight, Dr. House."
B.E. glanced to me, then he looked to Dr. Chase. "Thanks for meeting us, Chase, but I think I can handle things from here. Have Cameron page me with the results."
"You won't be waiting here?" Chase asked uneasily.
"Doubtful," B.E. answered.
Chase nodded and turned to leave, but Mother still had his arm in her grip.
"Dr. Chase, do you have a business card, in case we have need of a doctor again?" she asked coquettishly while tightening her grip.
Dr. Chase turned bright red and stuttered with embarrassment.
Blue Eyes encircled Mother's wrist with his own hand. "If you ever need to contact Chase, you only have to let me know, Imogene," he said with a voice of steel.
Mother's smile didn't falter, but her pale eyes darkened slightly. She released Dr. Chase and said, "Well, that will be fine then. It has been such an absolute pleasure to have met you, Dr. Chase. I do hope this won't be our last meeting."
Blue Eyes nodded at Dr. Chase and, taking the hint, he nodded at my mother and skittered down the hall.
"Would you like to go see your granddaughter, Imogene?" Blue Eyes asked in the same, steely voice.
"This whole ordeal has taken a lot out of me. I think I'd prefer to return to the hotel for a hot bath."
"When does your plane leave?" I asked her heatedly.
"Audra, don't use that tone with me," she snapped. "I have a nine o'clock flight in the morning, but since we now have to plan a wedding between you and Dr. House, I might have to delay my flight."
"No!" Blue Eyes and I both shouted.
"I'll go check you out, Tiger, and make sure there's a cab for your mother," Blue Eyes said as he made a hurried exit.
"Mother," I began.
"Audra," she interrupted, "I won't mince words. I find your doctor rude and gauche. However, since he is the father of your child, it is only befitting the two of you should marry. Of course, since you've been married before and the child is already here, it can't be a huge affair, but a simple, private wedding would be appropriate. A tasteful reception at the country club with only the most select invited."
"Mother, just shut up," I hissed.
She rose from her chair like a regal lioness gaining her feet. "I will not have you speak to me that way." She paused to place a palm against her forehead. "I'm feeling a migraine coming on. I will call you in the morning."
"But you're leaving in the morning," I called to her back as she glided through the curtains and down the hall.
When Blue Eyes returned, he looked around. "Where did Son of Sam go?"
As he removed my IV, I answered, "Out into the world. I don't think she's going to leave tomorrow."
"Get your skinny butt into some clothes and let's go see Zelda."
"About Zelda and her birth certificate . . ."
"Just get dressed, Tiger."
I did as directed. I held Zelda with milk sloshing all over her tiny, bird-like mouth. "Is she actually getting any in there?" I asked.
"Watch her," Blue Eyes said. He was sitting in a chair beside us. "You'll see her close her mouth very quickly every once in a while. That's when she swallows."
I concentrated on her fragile lips, and to my amazement I could see her swallowing just as Blue Eyes had described. I smiled and nodded my head enthusiastically.
"She's getting the hang of it," he said.
"Listen," I started, "I understand why you put your name on her birth certificate, but I don't understand why you told my mother. She'll now be he!! bent on getting us married."
"I didn't like the idea of Zelda not having a listed father, but bear in mind, should you try to extract a dime from me, a paternity test will settle any claim you try to make," he warned.
"I don't give a flying f#ck at a rolling donut about your money," I barked.
"A flying what at a rolling what?" he chuckled. "And as far as Adolph's forcing us into a marriage, you know damm well she can't force us to do anything we don't want to do."
"Mother is all about appearances. She doesn't care if I'm married, but if I show up toting a baby, there had better be a legal father docilely following behind carrying the diaper bag."
"How would she react if she knew you had been raped?"
"She can't find that out, Blue Eyes. I don't even want to think about her reaction."
He smiled. "That was another reason why I showed her the birth certificate."
Zelda had stopped her abbreviated form of nursing and began fussing, so Blue Eyes settled her back in her incubator while I readjusted my clothing. We walked out of the hospital together.
"Tonight's your last night at the hotel?" he asked.
"Oh, sh!t. I haven't found an apartment yet. Oh, bloody he!!."
"Fine. Let's go get your stuff at the hotel and bring you back to my place. You don't need to be that close to Bloody Mary anyway."
I allowed him to take control. I picked up my mail at the Radisson and discovered a message from Joel to call him.
"Joel, this is Audra. What can I do for you?" I asked politely.
"If you can coordinate with our staff, can you have your offices ready by Friday for a reception?" he asked.
"Next Friday? A week from today?" I stuttered.
"That's right. We want to invite any and every one to show off the new program. And I took the liberty to schedule you interviews with secretarial staff and TAs for Monday morning. Would that be agreeable?"
"Sure," I answered in shock.
Moving in with Blue Eyes was compatible because we hardly saw each other. He had a patient, so he was camping out at the hospital, and I was either at the university picking colors for walls and fabrics for chairs, or in the NICU with Zelda, or in my mother's wicked web, who steadfastly refused to either visit Zelda or go back to Alabama. I chose a cheerful young woman, Cindy Hunkapillar, as the part-time secretary, and a handsome, dark-skinned, dark-eyed young man, Troy Fletcher, for my teaching assistant. And my tests showed I was, indeed, anemic and low in vitamin B6.
The reception was scheduled for one o'clock. The caterers were providing a semi-lavish spread of munchies and a fruit punch along with assorted soft drinks. I purchased an orange-red, cowl-necked sweater dress that accented my lactating breasts and my diminishing midsection. I was nervous and excited as I prepared for the afternoon, although a call from my mother caught me by surprise.
"Audra," she began, "don't you think it would look better if we arrived at this reception together?"
"What reception? Mother, you're not invited."
"Of course I'm invited, darling. I'm your mother." I could hear her pause to take a pull on her cigarette. "I've only stayed here this long to assure your debut goes well."
"How did you find out about it?" I asked in horror.
"That Dr. Jacobs, your boss, called the hotel looking for you and we had a marvelous conversation. I agreed to help him with the invitation list, so we met over cocktails one evening and . . ."
"You helped make out the invitation list? You had drinks with Joel? Oh, I am so fired."
"I purchased a simple suit for the event. Do you think that will be appropriate?"
"You'll look appropriate in a fig leaf, Mother."
"Don't be flip, Audra. When do you plan to pick me up? And will your doctor be coming with you?"
"Why would Blue . . . Mother, did you have him invited?" I began to sweat.
"Darling, of course I had your fiancé invited. And I also had all of the medical personnel involved with you and your daughter invited. You need to show the university you have contacts in the medical branch – show them how far-reaching you and your program can be."
I had fleeting thoughts of not attending the reception rather than having to encounter Blue Eyes and his entourage trampling my brand new playground. It also occurred to me, since Blue Eyes hadn't mentioned the reception, he wasn't going. I hadn't expressed any desire to have him make an appearance, and we both knew he hated being in crowds, especially crowds of unfamiliar people.
Mother's voice brought me back. "Audra, what time will you pick me up?"
"I have to be there by noon to make sure everything is in place. I'm sure that would be too early for you. It might be best if you take a cab," I suggested.
"All right, then, I'll do that," she said as she hung up.