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Chapter 7

Alex struggled awake. Her chest hurt, her leg hurt. It hurt to breath. It hurt to be awake. Everything hurt. Someone was holding her hand. She blinked; the light was horribly bright. "Bobby?" she gasped and looked into her father's worried eyes.

"Easy, baby," her father smoothed her hair. "It's ok...you're all right."

Alex looked at him with exasperation. "I know I'm all right," she thought. "It's Bobby that I'm worried about." The last image Alex remembered was Bobby's face as he was wheeled in one direction while she went in another. He was struggling to stay conscious, his eyelashes fluttering over his chocolate eyes which seemed incredibly dark in comparison to his terribly white face.

Her older brother appeared over her father's shoulder, followed by a nurse. The nurse gently shoved the two men away. They roosted restlessly in a corner while she checked on Alex. "Here," she said, and gave Alex a cup with a straw. Alex sipped the cool water gratefully.

"My partner---Bo..Detective Goren...how is he?"

The nurse studied her. Alex's heart flipped inside her. "She's hesitating...oh no..." Alex thought.

"He's in critical, but stable condition. I know he lost a lot of blood, and there was some damage to his lung. But he's gotten through two surgeries in 24 hours and he's apparently a very strong and stubborn man." The nurse leaned forward and gently adjusted Alex's pillow. She radiated comfort and competency, and Alex liked her. "You hungy?"

Alex shook her head.

"How about something like a milkshake?"

Alex considered. "Chocolate?"

"Chocolate," the nurse replied. "And I'll check on Detective Goren's condition. But don't worry—we like police around here."

Alex wanted to crawl into a ball, to weep for Bobby and herself, but she saw her brother and father approaching. "Can't break," she thought. "Can't let them know..." She smiled wanly at them.

The next few minutes were agony for Alex. Her brother and father meant well, but the only thing she wanted was Bobby. She was grateful when the nurse, milkshake in hand, arrived.

"You two, out," she said to Alex's brother and father. "She needs rest."

"Thank you," Alex said softly. She took a tentative sip of the milkshake. It was surprisingly good.

"You're welcome." The nurse looked at Alex carefully. "I checked on Detective Goren's condition—he's getting better, but it's still touch and go. He's in a drug induced coma, and will be for a couple of days."

"Can I see him?"

"Not right away—you've a nasty leg wound and a couple of broken ribs. But if you behave yourself I'll see what I can do about getting you a wheelchair and down to intensive care."

The next few hours passed in a daze for Alex. She was in some pain, although the painkillers made it seem that the pain belonged to someone else. Her family drifted in and out, but her thoughts remained fixed on Bobby. Someone helped her eat some soup. At some point Alex drifted into an uneasy sleep. She dreamed of Joe and Bobby, and at some point she realized she couldn't remember what Joe looked like.

Alex woke with a start. Her room was dark, and the faint light at her bed illuminated the form of Captain James Deakins, drifting towards sleep in the chair next to her.

"Captain," she whispered.

He woke with a shake, and then smiled at her. "Alex," he said softly, "it's good to see you awake. Do you need anything?" He leaned towards her.

"Bobby?"

"I just saw him before I came to your room. He's still in the coma, but the doctors are pleased. They hope to start bringing him out of it in the next two days."

"I...I want to see him..."

Deakins took her hand gently in his. "Don't push, Alex. You didn't take a walk in the park yourself, ok?"

Alex reluctantly retreated. "You look beat..."

"Just the usual political fallout. Don't worry...you and Bobby are the heroes here. It turns out that the guy Bobby shoved out of the way really is a friend of the mayor, unlike Lamont, who is currently the friend of no one."

"You caught in a crossfire?" Alex shifted carefully.

"Not as bad as the one Carver's in," Deakins replied, "and right now, I'm not inclined to be sympathetic." He looked at her carefully. "Alex, look, this sort of an incident...I'm seen it break up really good partners. Whatever happens...you...take all the time you need."

"I..will".

Deakins left her with a gentle squeeze of her hand. Alex tossed and turned through the night, the hospital bed suddenly uncomfortable, the painkillers useless. When the morning nurse arrived, Alex was picking listlessly at her breakfast.

"Ready for a ride?" the nurse asked cheerfully.

"Where?" Alex asked guardedly.

"To see that partner of yours."

Alex tried to hide the pain in her leg as the orderly wheeled her down the hall. Just outside the ICU an impossibly young doctor intercepted them and took over the driving duties.

"So you're Alex," she said. "He's murmured your name a few times, especially before he went into surgery."

Alex stared at her hands in her lap. "We..we're partners...friends...we're close."

The doctor nodded. "Look, it's going to be a little scary—he's hooked up to a lot of things—it looks much worse than it is. Just talk to him—read to him if you want—hold his hand. It'll all help."

"How...how bad?"

"The greatest danger was the blood loss and the shock. He's past that...although that was a bit of a miracle. He has a great will to live. We're going to start bringing him out of the coma tomorrow. Here we are..."

Alex peered through the glass divider. It was scary. Bobby lay elevated in a bed. Tubes were going everywhere. A respirator was breathing for him, and his eyes were taped shut. His face was horribly pale. In spite of the stubble that covered his face, Bobby looked young and vulnerable. Alex shivered. The doctor carefully moved the wheelchair through the door.

"The respirator..." Alex whispered.

"Just while he's on the drugs...we'll try to remove it when he wakes up."

"The tape...on his eyes..."

"Just to help him stay asleep. It's bright in here, and that can be disruptive. Those will go soon, too." The doctor carefully set the chair next to Bobby's bed. "I swear to you, in spite of appearances, he is getting better." The doctor gave Alex a reassuring smile, and walked away.

Alex felt a part of her heart break. "Oh, Bobby," she whispered. She winced as she leaned forward, but still let her hand touch his rumpled curls. She let her hand slip down and across the thickening, soft stubble on his cheeks. His right neck and shoulder were covered in a heavy bandage. Alex took Bobby's left hand in both of hers; she leaned forward and softly brushed her lips against his hand.

"Oh, Bobby," she whispered again, "I don't know if I can do this.

End Chapter 7