Chapter 10: A Wounded Soul

Cassie received many letters from Harry throughout the spring term. The happiest being when he finally received his Firebolt back from Professor McGonagall.

Aunt Cassie!


Professor McGonagall gave it back to me! I have my new broom back! Seems Sirius Black hadn't sent it after all! Hope you can come to one of our matches left this year!

Your nephew,

Harry

Cassie smiled to herself. Remus said Harry flew as well as James did, perhaps even better. Maybe I'll pay Harry another visit and see him play his last match. She decided to try and keep it a surprise, incase she couldn't make it after all. It would be so nice to see another Quidditch match. "Living with muggles, you do miss the fun things of being magical!"

Cassie got up and walked to the kitchen to make a hot cup of tea. She needed to relax. It had been a couple months since she had seen Sirius in the Forbidden Forest and she hadn't heard from him since. "I do hope he's okay. He's all alone, with no set place to live. I hate to think of what he's been eating!" She started to make her tea and let her mind wander. She thought back to when Sirius showed up on her family's doorstep his and James' sixth year.

FLASHBACK

The Potter family was just sitting down to dinner when they heard a loud knock on the door.

"Who could that be?" Mrs. Potter wondered out loud as Mr. Potter rose to answer the door. Mrs. Potter, Cassie and James continued eating, assuming it was just one of their father's business associates.

"James! Cassie! Come to the door please." They heard their father call. The two rose, bewildered, from their chairs and walked to the front door. Standing in the foyer was a wet and grinning Sirius Black, holding his broomstick and what appeared to be everything he owned.

"Sirius! What are you doing here?" James asked, walking forward to greet his best mate.

"Sirius! You are soaking wet!" Mrs. Potter exclaimed when she walked into the foyer. She grabbed a blanket off the sofa and moved to wrap it around the dripping boy.


"I'm awful sorry for intruding Mrs. Potter, Mr. Potter. But I've run away and I had nowhere else to go. I won't stay long, just for a few days, if you don't mind." Sirius' grin had vanished. His lips were pulled tight and his eyes had lost their sparkle. He looked much like a frightened little boy and Cassie's heart jumped out for him.

"Nonsense! You will stay here for longer than a few days. Now come here, let's get you out of those wet clothes. Cassie, go get some clean, dry clothes from the basement. He can wear James' until we can get his washed and dried." Mrs. Potter began fussing over the visitor like a mother hen.

When Cassie had emerged from the basement, Sirius and James had gone up to the spare bedroom while Mr. and Mrs. Potter went back to their dinner. "Cassie, they're upstairs. Do bring down his wet clothes, please?" Cassie nodded and walked up the stairs. She reached the top of the stairs and heard the boys talking from the spare room.

"It got worse, James. They…I couldn't stay there. Mum almost broke my arm she grabbed me so hard. I'm sorry if I'm intruding. I just didn't know where else to go."

Cassie cleared her throat as she walked towards the room so the guys would hear her coming into the room.

"Here are some dry clothes…" Cassie started when as she walked into the room. Cassie's breathe caught in her throat when she saw the older boy without a shirt. Merlin, he's so ripped! Cassie! What are you doing! He's your brother's best mate!

"Thanks Cass. I really appreciate it." Sirius flashed his famous, award winning grin and she felt her knees weaken. "Do ya mind leaving, while I change?" Cassie stared into his eyes.

She quickly snapped out of her reverie. "Oh, sure. Sorry." Cassie searched her brain for a snappy comment but found none. She simply walked out and downstairs to where her parents were eating, forgetting to bring down the wet clothes.

Cassie busied herself making the tea until she heard a scratch on the front door. I wonder what that could be. Cassie put down her tea cup and walked to the front door. She cautiously opened it, peering around. Her eyes fell to a large bear-like black dog on the step. The dog collapsed almost as soon as Cassie had opened the door. He fell to the doormat with a soft thump.

"Oh Merlin!" Cassie threw open the door and bent down. "Sirius, are you okay?" she whispered to the dog. She ran her hands over the course fur. Her hand felt something wet and when she picked her hand up she noticed a red, sticky liquid.

"Oh Sirius! I have to get you inside. Can you walk?" The dog made to stand up, but collapsed again, almost immediately.

Cassie wrapped her arms around the massive animal and gently picked him up. "It's okay. I'll get you cleaned up."

She laid him on the soft carpet and ran to get a damp cloth and some bandages. When she returned, he had transformed back to his human form. He lay panting on the floor, unable to move.

"Oh Sirius! What happened?" Cassie knelt down and began to clean the wounds on his forehead and arms. "It's okay. This will sting for a minute." She wiped away both the dried and wet blood and then bandaged up the wounds.

"What did this to you? Oh dear." Cassie felt her eyes well with tears. She blinked them back furiously, unwilling to let him see her cry.

"Cassie?" Sirius whispered. "Yes. I'm here. I'm not going to leave you." She bent down and kissed his cheek. "I won't leave you."

Sirius struggled to sit upright. "What are you doing?!" She exclaimed when she realized what he was trying to do.

"I…I need to…get out of…here" he panted. His breath was coming in rough gasps.

"You are not leaving! You can't!" She tried to keep him on the floor, lying down. "You're hurt! You're still bleeding!"

"I'm… fine. It's…just a cut."

"Bloody hell it's a cut. Sirius Black, don't do this! Don't come to me for help and then leave! Damnit Sirius! Don't do this!" Cassie's eyes flashed angrily.

"I can't stay here! They'll find me. They'll…hurt you."

"No one is going to hurt me! I'm fine." Cassie brushed his hair from his eyes. "Let's get you on the couch and I'll get you something to drink."

Cassie helped the thin man climb onto the couch and then went to get him a drink from the kitchen. When she returned, she noticed him sitting upright. "You should be lying down." She sat next to him and stared into his eyes. She saw such pain, but a small glimmer of hope.

"I'm sorry, Cass. I had no where else to go. I was trying to get some food out of the trash and some bully kids came along. They…they really hurt me. I thought they were going to kill me." Sirius looked down, embarrassed. "Of all the things. The dementors wouldn't have gotten me, some bulling kids would have." A trace of a smile appeared on his face. "Imagine the irony." Sirius' smile faded.

"Oh Sirius," Cassie squeezed his leg, "I had no idea what happened! You were lying lifelessly on my step! I thought you were dead!" Cassie laid her head down in his lap and cried. She cried and cried; crying until she thought she couldn't cry anymore.

"Shhhh. Cassie, don't cry! I'm not dead, not yet anyways. Come on Cass. Shh." Sirius ran his hand through her hair, trying to comfort the crying young woman.

"Oh Sirius. I'm sorry." She sat up, wiping away her tears. "I must look like hell." She sniffled as she met his eyes.

"No, you look beautiful, like always." He kissed her cheek. "Mm, salty. You've never cried this much in the entire time I've known you." Sirius smiled and brushed a lock of hair from her beautiful face.

She smiled. "I was fine until you got back. You came back into my life and all hell has broken loose. I don't know which end is up!" Cassie felt her self begin to cry again. She struggled to get herself under control again.

"I'm sorry Cass. I reckoned that the one person I had to find when I escaped was you. You Cassie! Not Remus, you. Yes you believed me, but I could convince Mooney if I had to. I wanted to…no I needed to see you. You're it Cass." Cassie looked into his sad, grey eyes and she saw them fill with tears. "Cassie, I know I haven't been the best person. But when have I ever been? I've missed you. I love you Cassie, I really do."

Sirius hugged the young woman close to his chest. Cassie could hear his heart beating beneath his torn, ragged robes. She hugged him back with all her might.

"Merlin, Sirius. I'm sorry. I…I guess I'm just stressed is all." She laughed lightly. "It's just…I don't know. I want a normal life. I want to get married and have children. I don't want to be frightened anymore. I've been frightened for sixteen years."

"I know Cass. Believe me I know. I'm scared too. I wake up every morning not knowing if today will be my last day. Every morning I think that maybe the dementors will get me today. Maybe today will be my last day. And then I worry, because I haven't seen you in a while. What would happen to you if I died?" Sirius brought her hand to his lips and gently kissed her fingertips. "Cassie, I hate to ask, but would you mind if I stayed here tonight?"

"I was just going to ask if you'd stay. Come on. Let's get you into bed." She took his arm and led him down the hallway. He made to stop at the spare room, but she pulled his arm.

"No. It's… been way too long since…since I've been asleep in someone's arms." Cassie felt her cheeks redden. "I…I'd like it if you stayed with me; in my room." She looked up and met his eyes. She saw him smile and he nodded. Oh I'm glad she suggested it cause if I did, she would have slapped me. I could use some comfort. Sirius thought as she led him further down the hall and into her room.

"I've missed you so much" she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him close.

Sirius breathed in her scent and hugged her back. "Oh Cassie, I've missed you too."

"You stay here; I'm going to go change into my pajamas. I'll be right back. Now don't leave this time!" Cassie stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. She walked out of the room and shut the door. Sirius stood alone in the room, taking in everything. The room was decorated to exactly portray Cassie. It was painted a pale purple, with butterfly stickers on the walls. Her bed had a lovely white, lace canopy and a white, lace bedspread.

When she returned, she sent him off to wash up. Cassie climbed into bed and relaxed into the soft sheets. What am I doing? I've been asking myself that an awful lot lately! "Cassie girl, you are going crazy!" She said aloud as Sirius entered back into the room.

He walked towards the bed and stripped down to his boxers. Sirius lifted the blankets and climbed into the soft, warm bed.

"You look much better when you're clean" Cassie said, snuggling close to his warm body. Sirius stiffened, when she touched him, but quickly relaxed. "Are you okay?" Cassie asked, turning to face him.

"Yes. I'm sorry, it's just…it's been a long time since I've been in bed with anyone, let alone in a bed." Sirius leaned down and kissed the smiling woman fully on the lips. He broke away almost as soon as it had started. "I'm sorry. I…I shouldn't start this. Not now, not like this." Sirius rolled away from Cassie as she stared at him.

"What are you talking about? Not like what?" She pulled at his shoulder, begging him to turn and face her.

"This. We can't do this. Not now Cassie. I can't hurt you anymore. I've hurt you enough in the past seventeen years to last a lifetime." He looked straight into her bright, blue eyes.

"What if I wanted to? What if I wanted this? Yes, you've hurt me, but…Sirius. I love you and I have for a long time. I lied when I said I was happy with what happened between us. I wasn't happy. It was horrible living without you. You were so close, but I couldn't have you."

"Cassie, I…" Sirius began, but Cassie kissed him, cutting off his train of words. "Please Sirius. Don't talk. Just kiss me."

Sirius abandoned every negative thought he had and concentrated solely on Cassie.