And no, I do not support Yaoi at ALL. But this situation is based from true events as is just damn funny.
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How to Annoy an Angsting Host
Visitor: Reno (+drink)
Tranquility. Even with his patience shattered, his wallet lost to Tifa and a Kleptomaniac, and his legs bandaged and hole-ridden, Vincent Valentine finally had time to do what he wanted, for once.
No superiors with orders. No Scientists with gigantic guns. No FEMALE scientists with curves... or anybody else for that matter. Just Vincent, a masterpeice novel, and a steaming bath of bubbling water fit for a spa. The renovations to the estate had fully restored it to it's former glory. But Vincent in his silent laziness, had left it so unkept that the spiderwebs had returned in no time.
Although he still had his secret joy. In the form of bubbles.
'No one will ever no.' He fleefully though to himself as the usually red garbed, but currently naked Vincent popped a few of the millions of bubbles surrounding him in the bathtub. His novel to the side, and his claw casually popping innocent bubbles as they drifted past. Nothing could ruin this moment...
CRASH. "Hey Vinnie!! You'll never guess what just happened to your front door!"
...damn.
Within seconds, the murmurring, stumbling, bottle waving redhead that was Reno had descended upon Vincent's bathroom in a hysterical greeting along the lines of 'booze time!'.
"Uh... Reno. This is a bad time."
This was followed by slackjawed laughter as Reno noticed Vincent was in the tub, completely nude, and buried by bubbles.
"Cooool! Hey Vinnie, wanna play sailor?" Before Vincent could solve his confusion with a question, it was replaced by un-imaginable shock and terror as Reno dove head first into the bathtub, and his crotch.
"What the hell?!"
"Come on Vince! You gotta be the captain!"
"Reno what the hell are you doing!? That's my-!"
Reno, in a sudden change of heart, found his way up to Vincent's face, and what was worse, Vincent found himself helplessly pinned between an intoxicated loon and potential drowning.
If he knew that Reno was going to kiss him, he would have chosen the drowning. After suffocating Vincent with the most foul smelling and sloppiest kiss one could ever dread receiving, Vincent was almost tempted to scream, but could only cough and gurgle as he was rolled around in the tub by a mysteriously emotional, yet terrifyingly horny Reno.
"Come 'ere Vince! You know you've missed me!"
"Dammit Ren-" Sploosh. "What the hell are you-" Sploosh. Gurgle. "Get off of there!"
Reno proceeded to drag Vincent from the tub, and downstairs (considering he wasn't the heaviest, nor physically imposing of men) to perform an impromptue ball in the main foyer. While Vincent struggled dripping and nude the whole time. Thankfully very hard drinking followed soon after.
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The next Morning, Vincent would awake in his ever welcoming bed from a land of nightmares, and roll over to meet another. Reno would find himself in the same situation.
As two rather unmanly screams filled the house.