Title: On my Honor
Author: Yamato795
Pairing: Lots of mentions of RegalxAlicia, but no other ones planned at the moment…
Rating: Let's go PG-13 to be safe, since they do swear in the game, and the violence.
Status: Chapter 5 out of ? parts. Lots planned, but a number is not clear just yet.
Disclaimer: Don't own Tales of Symphonia. Please don't sue me.
Spoilers: A TON, mostly for Regal. I'd say this story is better suited for those who have beaten the game if you ask me. Read at your own risk of spoiling anything. Since it starts where Regal comes in, it should spoil quite a bit of the game after that, don't you think?
Summary: Take a look through Regal's eyes as well as a look into his past.
Author notes: This took me longer than I thought. Heh. I'm really glad that everyone that reads it is enjoying it so much. I wish I had more free time to work on it, but I do really try. The only note that I can think of is that I hope you enjoy, and that I tried my own spin on Regal's experience in prison this chapter. Let me know what you think!
On my Honor
Chapter five
After acquiring a pact with Gnome, the Summon Spirit of Earth, we had managed to sever our second mana link as well as become one step closer to our goal. While concerned was raised about what things would be like after the two worlds were separated, we continued onward to Flanoir in search of the Temple of Ice and the spirit Celsius.
It had been a long time since I had been near the icy city, yet the climate was given no chance to hinder me. Monsters riddled our venture to the temple, and hindered our progress through its chilling structure. I suppose battling numerous monsters was a decent way to keep warm considering it was necessary to defeat the creatures to reach the seal room. It was only after we had formed the pact with Celsius that we were given time to catch our breath it seemed, as the monsters that had bombarded us before now seemed wary, keeping their distance as we made our way out of the temple.
Upon our exit, though, the ground began to tremble. The sudden shaking was familiar, a signature of yet another mana link being torn out, or so we believed. While we had already experienced it twice, we were all startled by the sudden tremor.
"It's an earthquake!" Lloyd practically yelped in surprise, stumbling to catch his balance but still managing to bump into Zelos. Tehte'alla's Chosen gave him an annoyed look, pushing him away, and the crimson wearing swordsman had to deal with a patch of ice before he finally attained sturdy footing.
"It's happening a lot lately." Sheena commented after giving Zelos a warning look that had the red head holding up his hands in surrender.
"Perhaps it's related to severing the mana flow?" Raine remarked as if to remind them of all of the other instances where this had happened before. The Professor and I had discussed such a theory when we left the Temple of Earth, and had agreed that such a thing was possible. "There was an earthquake soon after we stopped the mana flow between Volt and Undine."
"Splitting the worlds apart is no minor task. An earthquake or two should be expected." I commented as the ground finally ceased to shake just as abruptly as it had begun. From the corner of my eye I could see the Professor nod in agreement. Considering it was a mana flow that connected the two worlds, instituting the system of one world flourishing while the other was in decline, having two opposing Summon Spirits active at the same time would at least break the system if not break the two worlds apart.
"Well, either way, we should get going. It's really could out here." Colette spoke up after a moment, hugging herself for warmth. The wind had picked up again, billowing out loose snow around us. She shivered again flashing Lloyd a sheepish grin to quell his worry.
"Should we stop at the Flanoir Inn to plan our next move?" our young leader asked instead of voicing his concern for his childhood friend, starting back through the snow the way we had come.
"Did we not already buy supplies?" Presea questioned her confusion only making it into her voice not her expression as she spared a glance up at me. When we had stopped in the town earlier Raine had given the two of us several hundred gald to buy ingredients, as much food as possible with the amount she'd given us. "Or are we going to rest before we continue on?"
"It would at least give us a chance to warm up." Zelos said as he too hugged himself for warmth, his teeth starting to chatter. I was beginning to think we'd been out in the cold too long, but my train of thought was disrupted by a flash of light in the distance. When it was followed by a rumble of what sounded to be thunder, our eyes were drawn in the direction the light had come from. Taking a few stunned steps forward, the red headed Chosen was nearly gaping in shock. "What's going on!"
Presea took a few steps forwards as well, her azure eyes wide. "That's…the direction of Ozette…"
"…Yes." I managed to say softly, hating that it was true. Whatever was happening in the quiet little treetop village, it could not be good from the looks of it.
"What could it be?" Genis demanded with his eyes squinted slightly in the hopes of being able to see more. The boy stood on his tiptoes, the color draining from his young face. "There's a staggering amount of mana flowing from that lightning."
"I have a bad feeling about this." Raine whispered. Unfortunately I was certain that was how we all felt, especially when another lightning bolt ripped across the sky.
Lloyd pivoted slightly so that he could meet all of our gazes. "Let's go."
We followed without question, mounting the Rheairds and taking off in the direction of Ozette. As we drew closer, the knot that had twisted itself into my stomach jerked violently because it was very hard to miss the smoke that was rising from the village or the stray bolts of lightning. What could be happening there? I didn't know if I truly wanted to answer, not from what I could see of the small town, yet I did not hesitate as we circled around quickly to land. Lloyd, Colette, and Presea ran ahead as soon as their Rheairds disappeared into their Wing Packs, giving no heed to Raine's cry to wait. We had no choice but to chase after them.
When the three reached the top of the large branch and stood before the ruined inn, gazing upon the flames that were slowly consuming everything around them, Colette's eyes went wide and she gasped, freezing just as Lloyd and Presea had. "No!..."
"…This is…horrible." The pink haired girl managed to utter as she surveyed the devastation. For once the pain in her voice was evident, the vulnerability visible in her posture. While perhaps only her body was still child, in that moment she seemed reduced to the age she appeared, a little girl watching her home slowly destroyed and reduced to cinders. Genis had stepped up behind her, but I believe the young half elf knew that there was no comfort he could give her for this, not yet.
"What happened here!" the brunette swordsman demanded.
Sylvarant's Chosen shook her head, and then gasped again, pointing out in front of them on the ground. "Look!"
And while Colette had spotted someone on the ground, Genis had spotted something happening above. Large branches were becoming dislodged, eaten away by the flames, and seconds away from falling down on the unconscious villager. "Lloyd! Look!"
Frantically, the blonde angel called out to the stranger to warn him. "Look out!"
She was too late. There was nothing any of us could do as two of the large branches fell, one off to the side of the boy, missing him by several feet, and the second came down right next to him. Our young leader was the first to recover from the shocking sight, rushing to the child's side and kneeling down to see if he was all right.
"What's wrong, are you okay?" Lloyd asked him even as he coughed a bit on the smoke all around us. Presea, Genis, and Colette hurried over to join him to help rouse the fallen child. He the glanced around seeing how widespread the fire now was. "We have to get out of here!"
"This way." Presea gestured down the branch that led to her house. It seemed to be the only safe passage through the fire, the only area untouched by the destruction.
With Zelos' help, Lloyd managed to carry the unconscious boy to safety. Presea's house had not been damaged at all, but in the time we waited for the injured villager to wake, the branch that served as a path to the rest of Ozette burned and was destroyed, just like all that had been above it. I was actually surprised just how quickly the boy we rescued come to, but after Raine had looked him over thoroughly I should have expected as much.
His blue eyes fluttered open, surprise filling them instantly. He timidly glanced about, startled when a red gloved hand came into view and for a moment al he did was look at it. Then when he seemed to realize that none of us posed a threat, he took Lloyd's hand, allowing the swordsman to help him to his feet.
"What the hell happened here?" Lloyd asked him, one hand waving back in the direction of the decimated town.
"…I don't really know. Suddenly, lightning fell from the sky, and angels attacked the village." The blonde boy told us, his voice carrying a frightened note. After what he had probably seen and all he had just been through recently, it was understandable.
"Angels?" Raine repeated, as if to be sure she'd heard right.
"They had wings." He replied slowly glancing to her. "Those with wings are angels…right?"
Instantly Lloyd's expression contorted with anger, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. It was just like when Kratos had appeared to us here before, how infuriated the teen had become within seconds. "Dammit, it must have been the Cruxis!"
"Cruxis…so angels destroyed the village…" While quiet, Presea's voice was shockingly even, although it held a hint of her sadness if one was listening closely.
It was still difficult for her to express her emotions, thanks to her Exsphere, but that did no mean she didn't have any. After what she had just witnessed, on top of everything else she had already been through, had to be far as to much pain for anyone to bear alone. There had to be so much going through her thoughts, so many feelings meshing together to ensnare her, that even though I knew the answer, I asked her gently, "Presea, are you okay?"
"…I'm fine." That was not the answer I expected, but that she glanced up at me reassuringly was enough to stop me from pursuing the matter further, at least not yet. "But…this unsettling irritation…is this…anger?"
Zelos looked the blonde boy he'd helped carry to safety up and down, a small smile on his face. "I'm impressed you survived. Are you the only survivor? What's your name?"
"My name is Mithos." The boy answered in his soft, almost timid voice. "I lived by myself on the outskirts of the village, so…"
"You have the same name as Mithos, the hero!" the crimson wearing swordsman exclaimed, cutting into whatever the child had been about to say.
Genis suddenly looked curious. "…Wait, are you a half elf?..."
Mithos shook his head wildly, his eyes flashing with fear for only an instant before he took a few steps back from the group. "I…I…no."
The sympathy in Raine's voice betrayed that she knew his fear, perhaps she understood it better than the rest of us, and her gaze softened on the boy. "Relax. You can tell, can't you? We have the same blood flowing through our veins as you do."
"You're half elves too!" the boy practically gasped glancing back and forth between the professor and her younger brother, his disbelief clearly written across his young face. He then paused to look over the rest of us, his blue eyes measuring as they passed over, until confusion crossed his features and he turned back to Raine. "But you're with humans!"
"It's okay, we're all friend here." Colette assured him with a warm smile.
The blonde boy shook his head. "…Humans and half-elves as friends? You're lying!"
Genis took a few quick steps forward, cautiously as not to startle the other half elf, but to at least close part of the gap between them. "No, it's true. My sister and I are part of this group."
Again there was an underlying note of sympathy to Raine's voice. "Relax."
But in spite of their reassurances, Mithos still appeared on edge, his gaze wandering from the faces of the Sage siblings to discreetly observe the rest of our group. He obviously, and quite understandably, had issues with humans. "…Y…yeah, but…"
"Your reaction is understandable." I told him the hopes of easing some of his tension. "I've heard that the village of Ozette is particulary known for its contempt for half-elves. If you've lived an isolated life in this village, you must have suffered."
"What happened here?" The deep voice from the edge of the forest caught all of our attention, alerting us to the presences of Altessa and Tabatha. I was surprised I had not sensed their approach, but with all that had been happening around us my focus had already been divided between Presea, the destruction of Ozette, the unfortunate child Mithos, and what our party would do next.
"You're Altessa, right? What are you doing here?" Lloyd asked after turning to see just who had asked the question.
"I saw the lightning of judgment fall towards the village." The dwarf replied slowly as he once more surveyed the area around him. "But what in the world…"
"It was the work of Cruxis angels…" Presea cut in, her usually soft, flat tone laced with more bitterness than it had ever held before. She had lost her home to those who claimed to be angels and she did not even know why. Cruxis was made of half elves that used evolved forms of Exspheres, so perhaps they held the same contempt for the villagers as the people of Ozette had always held for them. But to destroy practically all traces of life here? Such a deed had to be considered monstrous, especially to a child who was raised here.
"Presea! You've regained your true self!" He appeared absolutely stunned, his eyes transfixed on the small girl. This was the same man that had refused to help her before, and now he was staring down the result of our assistance in reversing the parasitic effects of Presea's Exsphere. It was only after I was sure I saw a flicker of guilt across his features that Altessa spoke again. "How could they do this? Is this their punishment for failing the experiment?"
"What do you mean, punishment?..." Sheena's question voiced my thoughts almost exactly. What the dwarf had said did not make sense. What experiment could he mean, except for the one which involved the creation of Cruxis Crystals and Presea?
"…Nothing. It's nothing!" Altessa insisted all too quickly, his eyes having widened at what Sheena had asked. Panicked, he spun on his heel and all but ran back in the direction of his house before anything else could be said.
"Wait!" Lloyd exclaimed, charging after him.
Tabatha stepped into his path, one arm outstretched to keep him from following the dwarf. "THE MASTER BELIEVES THAT IT IS HIS FAULT THAT OZETTE WAS DESTROYED."
"Altessa is connected to Ozette?" Colette cocked her head to the side in bewilderment.
"...YES." The strange woman nodded before she glanced over her shoulder in the direction Altessa had gone. "EXCUSE ME. I AM WORRIED ABOUT THE MASTER."
She paused for only a second, as if she expected one of us to try to stop her, before she then hurried after the dwarf quickly fading from sight. In her wake, she left all of us confused, wondering just what a failed experiment had to do with the destruction of a village. Te silence stretched on for only a moment, yet it was slightly tense in that none of us seemed to know what to say.
Except for Presea, she was the first to speak up again. "I'm…going to follow him."
"Yeah." Lloyd agreed as he turned back to the rest of us, his expression full of determination. His gaze then fell on Mithos. "Mithos, you should come with us."
"But I'm a half elf and…" the blonde began to protest.
With a broad smile, our teenage leader shook his head to dismiss the argument. "That doesn't matter. Besides, what are you going to do if you stay here and the angels come back?"
Genis also turned to the blonde half elf, stepping up to him and taking his hand. "Lloyd's right! Let's all go together!"
Surprisingly enough, Mithos offered not further protest, although he had appreared very startled when the white haired spellcaster began to pull him along as our group started towards Altessa's. And with each step he took, the blonde boy seemed more at ease thanks to Genis remaining close to him along the way talking excitedly. I, on the other hand, was watching Presea more closely. She was off to face one who had had a hand in her condition, one who had helped to take part of her life from her, and yet her usual stoic expression remained.
She had to be suffering, how could she not? Her village, practically her home, had been destroyed and the people she once knew were gone. Already she had lost time, and she nearly lost herself. How much more would cruel fate take from her?
Altessa, even Tabatha, had not gone inside. Instead, they waited at the tope of the hill that led to the dwarf's home as if they had expected us to follow eventually. It was not until Lloyd stood only a few feet from him that I saw the craftsman draw in a breath, and then words spilled from his lips laced with the guilt I had spotted in him earlier. "…I was a craftsman who worked for Cruxis."
Our leader visibly bristled. "So you're on the side of the angels…of Yggdrasill!"
The dwarf looked stunned, gasping, "You know Lord Yggdrasill!"
"Know him!" Lloyd shouted incredulously clenching a fist. "Because of him, Sylvarant and Tethe'alla were twisted into worlds that fight for each other's mana!"
"…" Averting his eyes from the swordsman's fury, the dwarf's gaze fell onto Colette and he studied her for a moment before murmuring, "That's a Cruxis Crystal… I see. You must be the Chosen of the declining world. This may be fate. …What happened to Ozette was my fault…"
Presea rushed forward a few steps, the movement the only thing that betrayed the turmoil within her because her voice was still very collected, her gaze remaining even. "What…do you mean?"
"I came to hate the work I did, for it was indirectly taking people's lives. I ran from Cruxis and hid in Ozette." The dwarf explained slowly, his gruff voice quiet, nearly reserved as he had to turn his eyes from Presea's. It was as if in that moment he could no longer look at the small girl, the guilt that Tabatha had suspect him of before weighing down on him more than it ever had now that he was trapped under the young ax woman's glare. "But I was found by a Desian named Rodyle. He ordered me to create a Cruxis Crystal in exchange for my life."
"So that means the research on Presea was organized by Rodyle and the Pope, who then had you and Kate carry it out?" Zelos demanded as his features actually hardened a bit and he crossed his arms over his chest.
"…Right." Altessa nodded after a moment, glancing at all of us except for Presea the truly could not bring himself to look her in the eye again. "Rodyle, a Desian in service of Cruxis, was also planning to revolt against Cruxis. Because I supported him in that…Lord Yggdrasill grew angry and he… He destroyed the town of Ozette, which had protected me!"
Sweet Goddess…
No wonder it appeared his remorse would cause him to crumble, Altessa was in part the reason Presea had been experimented on. It was for his own life that he had participated in Rodyle's plot to create Cruxis Crystals, to protect himself he had corrupted the life of an innocent child. But it was, in fact, an answer to one of my most burning questions. I finally knew why such a cruel fate had fallen upon the girl that mirrored the face of my beloved. Quietly, to myself, I couldn't help but whisper sadly, shaking my head, "So this is how Presea…this girl who reflects my distant memories… This is how she was caught up in this… This is terrible beyond words."
Finally, Altessa mustered the strength to lift his gaze to Presea's, the relative silence now broken by his soft spoken words. "I'm sorry. I can never apologize enough, but…apologizing is all I can do now."
"…My time…will not come back." She murmured, her fingers curling into the folds of her dark skirt. "…The people of the village and Daddy will not come back."
"Presea…" Genis looked as if he wanted to move to her, to comfort her.
"I'm sorry." The dwarf said again.
The girl turned on her heel, putting her back to him in what could have been a very pointed, and shunning, movement. Yet I could see in her eyes just for an instant the sadness welled up within her threatening to burst out given any slight chance or small crack in her composure. "…Don't apologize. Even if you apologize…I can't forgive you right now."
"…" Altessa appeared torn, unsure of whether he should continue to profess his remorse or if he should respect her wish to stop apologizing. Finally he just turned, hurrying into the house without looking back, escaping for another moment the guilt Presea had to embody for him.
"PRESEA…I BELIEVE YOUR LOSS HAS BEEN GREAT." Tabatha broke the silence with her steady, even tone where only the words conveyed sympathy. "BUT PLEASE, DO NOT LOSE YOURSELF AS WELL."
When Presea did not react, Tabatha then moved silently to follow her master into the house, closing the door behind her. It seemed that none of us in the wake of their departure knew what to say, to the pink haired girl or otherwise, except for Mithos. "I…can understand Presea's feelings a little. Some things…never come back… Even if he apologizes…even if you want to forgive, you can't control those feelings."
The weight of the metal bonds on my wrists increased those words, my own guilt leaking into my thoughts and spilling from my lips. "Not being forgiven…that may be punishment."
Lloyd spun on his heel, his chocolate eyes seeking my own before he shook his head to dismiss the notion. "…I don't think that's right. Forgiving or not forgiving isn't a punishment…I can't really explain it well, but…"
"Ah, well, anyway, let's not get into a philosophical discussion right now." Zelos insisted as he tossed some of his red curls over his shoulder with a sigh. I could see he was watching the small pink haired girl from the corner of his eye before he exhaled loudly and went on to say, "Presea doesn't need to force herself to forgive him or anything. Let's just think about what we can do now."
"Yes, you're right." Raine agreed with a nod. "As for me, I think we should take this opportunity to ask Altessa all he knows about Cruxis. We currently don't have enough information. Wouldn't you agree?"
"Yeah…" Lloyd murmured softly. "Presea, would you rather wait here?"
After a moment, Presea pivoted to face him shaking her head. "…No…I'll listen as well."
It was a slow trek into the house as our group seemed hesitant to go inside. I was surprised that Presea wanted to face Altessa again so soon, after everything, yet her stoic expression again held firm, and once inside she had not trouble looking right at the dwarf. Fate had been so harsh to her, and yet she could move on, she could keep going forward in spite of losing practically everything she knew. I couldn't help but wonder if I would only add to that pain, if I had already taken something from her as well.
Any bond between us would only mean more suffering for her. While I wanted to know why I would see my beloved when I would gaze inter her azure eyes, I didn't want to see her look at me as she had Altessa, unable to forgive the unforgivable.
I should not have said anything during our discussion with Altessa. Yet when the Professor had come up with her theory of the worlds being bipolar, I had not really thought through my comment about the legend of the Other Worldly Gate in Altamira, and so I had brought it to her attention. Doing so had been foolish, but perhaps that would only be on my part.
The others would have no problem going to Altamira, Zelos had even suggested it before, but I could not go back there, at least not yet. I was the only one that dreaded going there, that refused to, and I would not be able to tell them why.
So when it was discovered that in the night, as the rest of us had been sleeping, guests of Altessa, Raine had slipped out and quite possibly had left for Altamira on her own, I did not protest as we set out to follow her. There was nothing I could really say. This was my home, and it had been my remarks that had spurred the half elven teacher on this trip, so what could I tell Lloyd or the others that would make them understand my hesitance?
I…cannot go back…
As we approached the gates of Altamira, the entrance into the city that I had lived and loved in, I felt my chest, my torso suddenly too small to contain my rapidly beating heart. Without thinking I had slowed my pace, falling slightly behind the others, and just before they could enter the city, I heard my voice, my strangely even and collected voice, shattering the silence. "I'm sorry, but I'm going to stay here."
All of them turned back to me, their eyes curious, prying, trying to pick apart my composure to find my reasons for wanting to stay behind. Lloyd tilted his head to the side, blinking in confusion before innocently asking, "What's up?"
I could not answer without lying, unless I wanted to reveal everything and that was something I was not ready for. So I said nothing, keeping up the front of calm, of indifference, trying not to sway with guilt under their gazes. I had come to care for all of them and yet I was ashamed that when I revealed all of my secrets to them, they would no longer offer me the kindness and acceptance they had given me before. "…"
"Won't say why, huh? Well, if you don't want to talk about it, that's your business." Zelos commented with a nearly smug grin. I had to wonder what he was thinking then; worried I might have just confirmed whatever suspicions the Chosen of Tethe'alla had about me. But he merely pivoted and put a hand on Lloyd's shoulder jerking his thumb in the direction of the resort town. "Lloyd, let him do what he wants."
Our young leader hesitated, whether it was because he worried about leaving me alone or whether he wanted to know my reasons for remaining outside of Altamira I do not know, but after a moment he gave in with a sigh. "All right. We'll catch you on the way out."
Even though he couldn't see it, I nodded, resolving to stay near the gates of the city to wait for them in spite of the memories that lay within the town. I watched them go for only a moment until I had to tear my eyes away, steeling myself against all of the reminders, all of the old scars that would be reopened with too long of a glance.
Altamira had once been my home. It had been where I had been raised, where I had grown up, where I had fallen in love, and where everything had crumbled down around me. The resort town housed everything I had known, everything I had loved, and nearly everything that I had made up my identity. But not anymore. I had destroyed that, I had lost it. Altamira could no longer be my home. I did not deserve anywhere to call home now.
And what would I have returned to? Contempt, disgust, and horror? To the pain of bittersweet memories and the sting of knowing that it was by my own hand that everything had been torn apart? No, Altamira could no longer be my home. There was no place in either world could truly be my home without by my side. Memories of her would never be enough.
And with I did to her…I do not even deserve those…
"Alicia, I…I've wanted to ask you something for a while." Regal sat across from her at the desk, something that was now normal for her in the afternoons, as she had been eating lunch with him for three years. But the tone of his voice was different today, almost nervous, and she saw him take a deep breath before he continued. "I was wondering if…if you would like to…maybe…join me tonight for the new play opening at the theater?"
She never meant to gape at him; she just could not believe that he was asking her to go with him somewhere other than his office or the dojo. Her lack of response, her silence, seemed to signal the Duke that he had done something wrong, causing him to trip over his own words.
"Forgive me, I never…I shouldn't have…" He looked away, the cheerfulness that usually filled his demeanor in her presence falling away, replaced by disappointment.
"Master Regal, wait…" Alicia spoke up quickly after seeing that hurt cross his expression. How could she have been so rude as to not at least reply to his invitation? Why was it so easy for him to make her speechless, surprising her again and again with his kindness and caring smile? "You're not trying to…thank me for keeping your secret, are you?"
As much as it hurt her to think of it that way, it was the only reason she could think of that he would ask her to join him that didn't get her hopes up. The Duke was a wonderful man, and she would have given anything for him to ask her what his invitation sounded like, but her rational mind put a stop to that hope. It reminded her that she was his servant, even if he was friendly with her, even if she knew his deepest secret, and because she was his servant Regal would never see her as anything more.
When his head snapped up at her accusation, she was surprised to see a tint of pink to his cheeks. "No, Alicia, that's not…you know I am in your debt for keeping my secret, but that's not why I wanted for you to come with me tonight. I will…understand if you refuse…I do not want you to feel obligated to say yes. And perhaps it was too much of a gamble for me to request a date…"
"A date?" she whispered stunned.
He nodded, blushing a bit more as he did.
"Master Regal, I'm so sorry! I thought…I never meant to…" The flush in her cheeks had to at least match his. While she was trying to contain her joy she was also struggling to soothe the hurt her reaction must have caused the young nobleman. "Oh, Master, I'm…I'm so sorry. I would love to go with you…if you would still like me to."
The smile that crossed his lips was gentle, reassuring, and he placed one hand over hers on the top of the desk, giving it a small squeeze. "The play doesn't start until ten tonight. I will come by your room around nine-thirty, all right?"
Oh, how she had to be blushing! "All right."
And for the rest of the day, Alicia was sure she was still blushing. She had left the Lezareno building in a daze, she'd done the rest of her duties in a daze, she barely noticed Sanji's knowing look, and she'd gone to her room still in a trance. Regal, the Regal Bryant, the man she had fallen for when she was just a child, had asked her out on a date! On a real, romantic, just the two of them for an evening, date! The entire day her heart had been trying to flutter out of her chest and fly away.
He'd asked her on a date! It was all she'd wanted for so long that she couldn't believe that she wasn't dreaming; that she wouldn't wake up any minute. But even as she dug through her closet for something to wear, even as she did her hair over and over again so it would be perfect, she prayed to Martel that if she were asleep now that she would never wake up. It took her until it was nearly time for him to arrive to be ready for him, but as she stood in front of the mirror she had to smile. The dress she'd splurged on a month ago was finally going to be put to use, as well as the earrings her sister had given her before she left for Altamira.
When a timid knock came from the other side of her door she nearly jumped out of her skin, but instead hurried to answer it. Her hands were shaking, she was afraid her whole body might be shaking, as she opened the door feeling faint while her heart threatened to grow wings again.
"Hello, Alicia. Are you ready?" His voice was soft, and he was grinning at her like he had up in his office, the combination nearly causing Alicia to melt on the spot. She couldn't stop her eyes from combing over him subtly amazed not to see him in a suit. He wore instead a simple, light green button-down shirt, minus the tie as she could tell he hated them, with a pair of tan slacks that hugged his well toned body. His long bangs were still slicked back and the length of his blue locks was tied back as well, allowing her to see the mixture of anxiety and warmth in his gaze. She couldn't believe that he was nervous as well.
"Yes, Master Regal." That was nearly an automatic response, which she was thankful for, because her voice didn't crack over the ingrained reply.
He shook his head. "No, tonight, I'm just Regal."
Did she resemble a cheery at that moment? Her face was nearly burning. "Oh, of course…"
When he offered her his arm, she took it without a second thought, allowing him to lead her from her doorway, only pausing to shut the door behind her, and then heading for the south exit. Alicia hoped she wasn't shaking, that he couldn't feel her racing pulse through the grip he had on her. But if he felt it, the noble never mentioned it. "You look lovely."
Had he ever seen her in anything but her uniform? Regal couldn't think of a time she'd worn anything but the black dress and apron that made up her daily attire, but it wasn't as if he didn't find her attractive in it. In fact, he thought her uniform made her look adorable, but he doubted there was anything she could wear that would have detracted from her beauty. Alicia had dawned a long, pale blue sundress that had thin straps to leave her arms bare, the skirt coming down to her ankles, and a pair of short heeled white sandals. She had redone her pigtails, having decided that she preferred her hair back, and the simple silver hoops that hung from her ears added just the right touch. Although, perhaps he liked the color in her cheeks more than the jewelry, but he'd never say so.
"Thank you." This was really happening, it was finally hitting her, now, as they walked through the gardens. She was leaving with the Duke, on a date, and he'd just given her a compliment. If not for the grip he had on her, Alicia was sure she would have fainted right then, the contact just enough to keep her from collapsing on the cobblestone walkway. She kept her gaze from his, hoping it would allow her to keep her voice. "You look very handsome too, M—um, Regal."
He didn't mention her slip, only watched her thoughtfully for a moment. There was no doubt that she was shy, he'd known that for quite some time now, he just was unsure how to make her comfortable, as he had never done this before. She might laugh at him if she knew that. A twenty-four-year-old man that had never been on a date before, it sounded pathetic. While he cursed the fact that he had no prior experience in these matters, he struggled to break the silence and cut through the growing tension. "I've heard the play is going to be some sort of romance story tonight. The reviews are favorable."
"Do you like romance?" He was silently celebrating the fact that she finally looked up at him, the color in her cheeks lessening. The last thing he wanted to do was make her nervous, or uncomfortable.
"It usually depends." Regal answered sincerely, with a small shrug, seeing that they were now in the limits of Altamira, the streets fairly quiet for this time in tourist season. Flashing her another of his dazzling smiles he drew her a bit closer so that he could lean down and whisper in her ear, "But I am certain that I will at least enjoy the company."
Alicia was absolutely certain that this was a dream now, for it was too good to be true. She was sure she'd never heard Regal, who'd been raised to be proper and serious all of his life, be playful. So she was sure that as real as the warmth radiating from his arm seemed, as real as his breath had felt too, that this had to be a dream. A vivid, wonderful dream. Either that she had died and this was paradise. Beaming up at him, she squeezed his arm slightly. "I agree, the company might be my favorite part of the evening."
Taking deep breaths, she knew that she could do this. She'd been having lunch with this man for three years, almost every day, and for those three years she'd talked to him. She could do this. It didn't have to be awkward. There was no reason for her to be nervous.
"Have you been to the theater here before?" He was still watching her, still keeping her close, almost as if he were trying to keep her off balance. Well, she knew that he wasn't trying to do that, the Duke was a gentleman through and through, but she couldn't help but feel something was working against her tonight.
"No, I don't usually go out late at night, or…I didn't used to." She answered, surprised no one else was waiting for the Elemental Railway once they stepped off the small elevator. She saw that the operator straightened when he caught sight of Regal, fumbling with the controls a bit after learning of their destination.
"That reminds me," the Duke said softly to her just as the train began to move, and he had gone back to observing her. "Master Goatta has been asking where you've been the past few nights. I think he enjoys when you come with me to the dojo almost as much as I do."
"Oh. I would come with you more, Regal; it's just that I'm not used to being out so late and then getting up early the next morning." Pangs of guilt made her smile recede, having to glance away from her date for a moment. She loved to visit with Master Goatta, Regal's trainer in the martial arts, but since most of her duties began early in the morning, it was hard enough to help her young master sneak in and out of the house, let alone go with him. "Honestly, I don't know how in the world you manage to do it."
"That is because you've never caught me asleep at my desk before." Regal chuckled with amusement. When they'd finally arrived, he paid no attention to the people murmuring in front of the pub, leading her straight to the elevator and past the casino. He was mindful of the fact it seemed she'd never been to this part of the island before, his pace slow enough to allow her ample time to look around before they crossed the bridge and descended the steps of the theater.
There weren't many people waiting in the seats yet, so there was plenty of room for them to sit with an excellent view of the stage. Alicia couldn't help but be excited that when they sat down Regal released her arm only to wrap his own around her waist. She couldn't believe how natural it felt to have him hold her close, even if it was lighting her nerves with an eagerness she'd never felt before. For a moment she was tempted to rest her head on his broad shoulder, but she stopped herself because she caught sight of another couple watching them, pointing, and whispering not far away.
"Alicia?" His voice caused her to snap back to attention, gazing up at him. Once their glares met he tilted his head to the side, quizzical. "Is something wrong?"
"Those people…they're staring at us." She nodded in the direction of the whispering couple, watching as Regal spared a glance at the people observing them before a frown set on his lips.
"I suppose I should apologize. I know how easily recognized I am, I just did not anticipate that people would be so rude as to gossip about my presence here." He sighed heavily, shaking his head for a moment. Leaning down to whisper in her ear, the arm that was wrapped around her waist tightened a bit. "Just forget about them, what they do isn't important. Tonight, you are the only thing that matters to me."
"Regal…" Alicia couldn't help but blush crimson again. She would have said more, but the lamps around the seats suddenly went low, music came from behind the curtain somewhere, and spotlights switched on with a loud click with their beams pointed at center stage. The show was about to start, and even though the audience was small, therefore unable to make enough noise to drown out the music, everyone around her fell into a hush.
The actors were much better than the actual plot of the production. The main character was a warrior that had a heart like stone until he came upon a land in crisis, and once he had saved the land from evil, a princess was promised to him as a reward. Only she refused to be his bride, even though he fell head over heals for her. Alicia lost track of what was going on once she found the courage to rest her head on the Duke's shoulder, and in response Regal took one of her hands with his free one and distracted her with by running his thumb idly over the back of her hand. She didn't think it mattered if she remembered the ending or not.
It wasn't that she fell asleep it was more like she was lulled into a comfortable state by the warmth of his body and the innocent way he held her. She could tell that Regal was not really paying attention to the play either, for he kept glancing down as if to check on her every once in a while. She would have liked to be able to talk to him, even though her eyes were somewhat drooping, the blissful feeling of being held flush against the Duke making the voice of the warrior confessing his love to the princess fade away. There was nothing left but how his thumb was brushing over her skin, how she was soaking in the warmth of being next to him.
When the lamps around the seats brightened and everyone around them began to clap loudly Alicia was roused from her trance. Politely, she applauded while the actors each took a bow, and from the corner of her eye she could see the same couple still watching her with Regal. She didn't understand what was so strange about the young president of the Lezareno Company going to see a play that they felt the need to stare. Once the applause died down their observers finally began to depart, only looking back a few times.
"That was almost dreadful, wasn't it?" Regal chuckled softly as he stood, holding out a hand to her, a sweet smile across his lips. For a moment all she could do was stare at him in the lamplight, memorizing the way it played off his handsome face.
"It wasn't completely awful." Alicia giggled, taking his hand, realizing that it didn't seem so strange to do that anymore. When he helped her to her feet he took her arm in his once more, something that made her beam up at him without thinking. "It was predictable, most romances are, but the acting was pretty decent. Plus the company was wonderful."
"And here I was worried you would not have a good time." The Duke remarked with that dashing smile, his azure eyes practically glittering. With a wave of his hand he motioned for them to begin up the steps out of the theater, back up to the bridge where gentle breeze made him sigh, inhaling the salty sea air. "At least it is a beautiful night."
She was surprised that he stopped on the bridge, but moved over to the railing pulling him with her, gazing out at the black waves as they rolled on endlessly it seemed. In all the time she had been in Altamira, she'd never really had time to appreciate the beautiful scenery. No wonder the resort town was so successful. The ocean view here was gorgeous, whether the sun was shinning, or it was the moon that was shimmering down over the water. How long had she been here, and never taken the time to notice? After a long moment, she had to look back up at him, somehow not surprised that he was watching her again, and grinned. "Yes. It's perfect."
"Well, nearly perfect." His comment surprised her, and she did not expect to hear concern in his tone either. "You seemed unsettled by those people watching us."
"No, I'm fine. It was just really odd to have them staring at us the whole time practically." She admitted slowly, trying to forget how strange it had been to feel eyes on her nearly during the entire production. She bit her lip without thinking about it. "Do you…get that a lot when you…"
"I'm sorry, Alicia." The nobleman sighed his shoulders slouching with the release of air. Just a moment before, he'd appeared so happy, so carefree, unlike when she saw him in his office in the Lezareno building. Yet now that he had brought up the way they had been watched, that cheerfulness seemed to have vanished, replaced by this sullenness. "I did not expect that my presence would cause such a stir. Perhaps the next time, I'll take you somewhere more private?"
Next time…he'd said next time. Her heart nearly fluttered away, and the shy smile he was now sporting could only mean good things. Regal really wanted to try this again! Yes the evening had been short, it was late now after the play, but it had been well worth nearly being spied on to be in the Duke's arms.
"That sounds nice." She whispered, suddenly realizing that he'd wrapped both arms around her, that he was leaning down far enough that she could feel his heated breath spray across her skin. When had he shifted their positions so that he was standing right in front of her, both arms curled about her waist, forehead nearly rested on top her own? Those azure orbs had Alicia in a trance, making her forget as soon as she noticed how close he was, only concerned with the depths of his gaze and how she was practically trapped within them.
His hand came up, gripping her chin, and his rasped words glided over her cheeks, warming them. "…Forgive me, Alicia…"
Before she could ask what he meant, Regal had sealed his lips over hers in one fluid motion that sent her entire world spinning off its axis. If she had thought she had been elated when he had proposed a second date, her definition of elation had to have been lacking, because it didn't compare to the sensation of his lips over hers. In reality it had been somewhat brief, chaste, and she could only guess as to why he had asked for her forgiveness before hand. He probably thought he was either rushing her, or it might not be something she wanted.
He drew back a moment later, not stepping out of the embrace, more like raising back to his full height, until her hands were on the sides of his face. Freezing, he could not stop himself from fearing the worst. Even if they had known each other for so long now that did not mean she would be comfortable with a kiss, that she would want one from him.
"I suppose you'll have to forgive me too then." Having to stand on her tip toes, she moved up to capture his lips in return, wanting him to see that he was everything she had wanted for so long. When his arms tightened around her and he bent so that he was more in her reach, she nearly giggled, but had to hold it in. She was kissing the Duke! She was kissing the man she had admired from the moment she had met him. But what meant even more to her was the fact that he had kissed her first.
So enveloped in each other, so engrossed in these new feelings sprouting between them, neither Regal nor Alicia noticed a familiar figure stumble out of the casino not far away. The man grumbled something to the woman that had shoved him out the door, his vulgar language and proposition causing her to slam the door that much faster. He took one last swig from the bottle as he stepped under the yellow ring of one of the lamps, questioning how drunk he really was when he spotted the couple on the bridge.
George swore, loudly. The more rational, and not as nearly intoxicated, part of his functioning mind had managed to recognize both Regal Bryant, his employer, and Alicia Combatir, in each others' arms. He could see that they were kissing, and it just made him question his sanity. When the sight didn't vanish, he cursed again.
That girl was going to be a thorn in his side. For years he had been struggling with how to get rid of Regal, ever since the night the Duke had escaped death on the Elemental Railway, unlike his parents. He'd been working to isolate the noble; make is so that if Regal were to suddenly disappear, it would not cause such a commotion as the death of the previous Duke Bryant and his wife. The drunken man could see his plan failing now, as Alicia clung close to the young man, and for the second time, George knew he had to change his strategy.
An accident hadn't worked. Isolation hadn't been achieved. It was time for something more drastic, but what? His eyes narrowed on the servant girl that his employer held tight, and even in his stupor, he realized that Alicia might be something he could use to finally get what he had been after for so many years.
I could not be sure how long I stood there, how long I waited at the mouth of the one place I was certain I could never return to, but I did not waver in my vigil of the gate. It was there that I remained, true to my word, until the group appeared once more, Lloyd at the front.
"Are you leaving?" I asked, more than ready to be rid of the sight of the city that held far too much of my memories.
"Yeah." Lloyd nodded with a small, practically forced smile. I was not sure what had happened in the city, I could barely even guess, but as they passed me, barely noticing that I fell in step behind them, I heard our young leader begin to discuss how to get to our next destination with Genis and Mithos. Whatever they had discovered about where the Professor had run off to, it appeared they were anxious to get going.
"Say, Regal." Tethe'alla's Chosen of Mana had been walking next to me for the past few minutes, watching me, finally deciding to voice his thoughts. The expression on his face held no hostility and yet I dreaded what he might have to say. Zelos was the only one who could expose me, if he only knew. "Why didn't you go inside Altamira, hmmmm?"
"I…don't like that city." I murmured having to turn my eyes from his. My response was as honest as I could be at the moment. I no longer 'liked' Altamira because of all the memories it held for me, all of the scars that it could slice back open.
"Oh, really. You got some sad memories there or something?" Zelos asked as he glanced ahead of us to make sure our conversation was staying private. That was odd, especially since he was no the one with something to hide. Yet he'd slowed his pace to match mine, falling behind our companions a bit to offer us this chance to speak without interruption or having to explain it to anyone else.
"…Chosen." I said without thinking to get his attention again.
"Yes?" His azure eyes snapped back up to mine.
It had to be seriously low of me to use what I knew of him against him in such a way, but for some reason it was like Zelos meant to rub salt in my reopened wounds. He had called my weakness, so perhaps on some level I felt it right to point out his, and griping my chin, I blurted out, "I've heard that, when it snows in Meltokio, you go on a pilgrimage and spend a long time in the city to the south."
For a moment his eyes widened, his grin gone, but when it returned, he held up his hands as if in surrender. "…Okay, okay, okay. Looks like we both have wounds we don't want touched. Well, it doesn't matter anyway. I just wanted to find out if you're that Regal or not."
Raising an eyebrow I waited a moment before I inquired curiously, "And what did you intend to do if I was?"
"…I was just curious." The swordsman insisted, tilting his head to the side to observe me, looking for something almost. Whether he found anything, I could not be certain, but he flipped some of his hair over his shoulder as he quickened his pace to catch up with the others. "Sorry for prying."
He knows…even if he hasn't put it together just yet…
But…he hasn't said anything to the others it seems…
I didn't understand if it was just something Zelos wanted to figure out to make sure he was right before he revealed all, or if he was trying to respect my privacy. Either way, the red headed swordsman was still trying to place me, trying to figure out if he knew me from before his journey. All I could do was wonder what he would do with such information because I couldn't bring myself to try to mislead him. If the Chosen of Tethe'alla placed my identity, then it would be of his own doing. I just had to wait and see.
Regal could barely remember his first few days in the palace dungeon after his arrest. He knew that he had sent a letter to George dictating how Lezareno should be handled as well as his wishes for Alicia's funeral. But there wasn't much else he could be certain of other than the fact that he had been wallowing in his sorrow, seeing his crime replayed in his mind a million times over. Then it just seemed that he woke up one day in a cell.
The King had probably been powerless to stop the process of him being assigned to a cell with two other prisoners, as when he woke it was to the unfamiliar sounds of two men arguing. Regal shook his head, amazed that he'd been lying down on a bed that hung off the wall by two chains, and then he slowly sat up planting his feet on the floor. Azure eyes blinking, struggling for focus, he brought his hands up to rubs his eyes only to find his wrists were restrained by a heavy pair of shackles. It should not have startled him, if he remembered correctly he had demanded they be put on him even though prisoners were not usually shackled while in their cells, but it was still shocking to see them and to be instantly reminded of why he wore them.
Pain surged through him, its all too familiar ache wrenching at his tattered heart while his mind envisioned his beloved. Would there ever be a moment where he was not consumed with grief? An instant where he knew anything but the loss he had suffered and the deed he would never be able to erase? Tears stung the corners of his eyes urging him to lie back down, to let these feelings consume him, because all he deserved now was a slow death in the hell he'd thrown himself into.
"I see the great Duke has finally decided to grace us with his presence." The growled out comment once again alerted Regal to the presence of his cellmates, his head snapping up only to be fixed with a pair of harsh gazes. One of them, the larger of the two who was of a build similar to the nobleman's, stood, sneering, and Regal could only assume that he was the one that had spoken. Coming closer and into the sunlight streaming in from the barred window behind the Duke's head, this man then licked his thick lips displaying yellow teeth as he ran a large hand through his slimy brown hair. "That's you, isn't it? Duke Bryant? The one I heard killed a girl?"
The stoic expression that the young nobleman had perfected over the years did not slip in spite of how his insides twisted at those words.
"That's him, Spike." The other cellmate chimed in, his voice nervous, shaky. From what Regal could make out of him in the shadows, this prisoner was a very thin, gangly, human being. "The-the guards told me that's who he is! He's Duke Bryant all right."
"So, how the mighty have fallen, eh, Gib?" Spike laughed dryly, glancing back at the other man before leaning down in the nobleman's face with that mocking sneer. "Never thought I'd see the day one of your fancy asses got locked up in here like the rest of us common trash. What do ya think, Gib? Does he look like a killer to you?"
Regal was barely listening to him, barely aware of the stench of the breath that Spike was spraying in his face. He had never been concerned with the opinions of others, not even now, because nothing mattered anymore. How could anything have meaning when he had taken the life of the one he loved, when he had used the techniques Master Goatta had taught him to kill Alicia? No, the words of these men were meaningless, whether they were aware of that fact or not. What could a taunt mean to a hollow man, a man whose soul had been broken the instant his lover had drawn her last breath? He merely stared straight ahead, not even bothering to lift his gaze to that of his cellmate's.
"Guards said he's a killer." Gib stammered insistently. "Said that he killed some girl."
Spike snorted in the Duke's face. "What a joke! Killed a girl. That why they keep you handcuffed, your lordship? They think you're so dangerous 'cause you killed some chick?"
Perhaps it was the lack of response or rise from the Duke that caused the burly man's face to contort with rage and his hand to shoot out to clamp around Regal's neck abruptly. The movement slammed the young noble's head into the stone wall, jarring him from his pit of despair, but he did not flinch. He merely set his jaw as Spike yelled in his face, "Let's get one thing straight right now, pretty boy! Out there you might have had everything handed to you 'cause you were on top, but here I'm your master. Not the guards, not the warden, me. And I already don't like you."
Even though it was hard to breathe Regal put up no struggle against the other criminal's grip. Why did he need to struggle? Wouldn't death be his only release from this pain?
"Those fools are wrong if they think you're dangerous." The prisoner snarled in sheer malice. "You know how many people I've killed? You know how many people I've made beg for their lives only to laugh as I took it from them? No…you don't know what killing is. Doesn't matter though, your lordship, I'm going to make your new life hell. Fair trade, right? It's about time you served someone like a dog, isn't it, Duke Bryant?"
Azure eyes did not even twitch, the nobleman more like the motionless, nearly comatose statue the guards had first brought into the cell, even with the hand clamping down on his throat. This made Spike livid, his auburn eyes full of fire as he released the nobleman's neck to throw a solid punch into Regal's cheek. His only satisfaction with the blow was that it snapped the Duke's head to the side since there was not even a yelp of pain following the hit.
The same hand that had tried to strangle him then grabbed his chin, roughly jerking his head upwards to force their gazes to meet. Spike looked at him incredulously for a moment before he laughed again. "You don't fight back, do you? You just going to let me smack you around, Bryant? Is that 'cause you feel guilty?"
It quickly became Spike's favorite taunt. Each day he would corner Regal, would taunt him about feeling guilty and not fighting back. Some days were worse than others, as Gib did not always feel inclined to call for the guards until after Spike had gotten in a good beating on his favorite victim and Regal never said a word. The Duke nearly welcomed the physical pain as it kept him from falling deeper into his despair and losing himself to grief. The only time that Regal had away from Spike was when he was thrust into the prison yard.
Actually, it wasn't much of a yard; it was really more of a huge room underneath the palace that some of the less dangerous prisoners were taken for a few hours a day. As the guards seemed to know of how the Duke was treated in his cell they took Regal at a different time interval than Spike, if they even took Spike out at all.
The young noble did not even talk to the other prisoners when he was in the yard, and most seemed wary of him. Only an older man who was starting to hunch over dared to speak to the grief stricken nobleman, and that was because he'd heard of Regal as well as the fate he'd been dealt. Not only was Regal trapped in a cell with another murderer who loved to torment him, but it wasn't long before he would be thrown into a match against a wild beast in the battle arena.
Levin had seen the remorse in the azure eyes of this broken man. It wasn't until many days after he first spoke with Regal that he told the younger man that that was the reason he'd felt compelled to listen to the Duke's side of the story and to help him.
Raine had gone to the Other Worldly Gate on her own. She was studying it when we arrived. By moonlight she was looking over the strange circle of stones, and she was surprised when we came looking for her there. In a soft voice she told us that she had already been here, that she had spotted it from above when we had rescued Colette, and that this was the place that she and Genis had been abandoned. This was the ruin she had been searching for. Their parents had left them here, and it was because of the gate that they had lived in Sylvarant for so long. Our time for reflection, however, was cut short when a ninja from Mizuho, Kuchinawa appeared, along with dozens of the Pope's Papal knights.
Sheena was startled by his presence, by his admission of his allegiance with the Pope, and the fact that Kuchinawa sought revenge on her for her part in his parents' deaths. She tried to convince them, after several knights attacked us only to be defeated with ease, that she was the only one that deserved to die since Kuchinawa's grudge was with her. At the same time, the gate had become active thanks to the full moon, and to keep the summoner from sacrificing herself, Zelos pulled her with him into the portal that opened up. Lloyd told us to follow, so all of us charged in after them.
It was as if we were falling, that the world had opened up around us to allow us to be pulled away. And then we suddenly landed, in another world, in Sylvarant, and whatever it would mean for our journey.
To be continued
End notes: I have to say, I like how this chapter came out. It's a bit more about the flashbacks this time, but that is okay since I love what I've done with Regal's back story. There really wasn't much of that in the actual game. I hope you all enjoyed, and I hope that you'll keep reading. This is where it gets really fun!