Disclaimer: Fine, we're giving up the battle to own Grey's Anatomy. But on one condition...we get to own Patrick Dempsey.
The next week went by almost too slowly. Even surgery couldn't distract me from my upcoming date with Meredith. I had made the decision that Meredith would come over to my trailer for dinner. She seemed excited, well, at least as excited as Meredith could seem. Everytime we made a step forward, she seemed to become even more nervous. I couldn't figure her out, but I was hoping a romantic dinner would help.
I looked around the trailer, a nervous excitement resting in my belly. Meredith didn't know I lived in a trailer. I had no idea how she would take it. Any other girl I had ever dated would have ran, but Meredith was different. But it was a trailer. She probably expected a house, or at least an apartement and I was giving her a trailer. I paced around, anxious for the night, until the phone interrupted me. I quickly picked it up. "Shepherd."
"Derek?" her voice immediately made me stop in my tracks. Something was wrong. I didn't know how I knew, but there was something her voice.
"Mer, what's up?" I asked her, urging the nervousness to stay out of my voice.
"Um, I'm really sorry, but uh, something has come up," she stammered softly.
"You're cancelling?" I asked, hearing the dissapointment in my own voice. I had been so looking forward to tomorrow night, I was sure it was the night that I finally would break through her barriers and figure her out.
"I'm really sorry, Derek," she sighed. "I was really looking forward to tomorrow, but I can't. Something, um, I have to do something. And it uh, just came up. And I'm really sorry. I really am."
I held back the sigh that was threatening to escape my mouth, knowing Meredith didn't have to feel any worse than she already did. "It's okay, Meredith. Can we reschedule?"
"Can we?" she asked. "I mean, I want to. If you want to. You're not upset?"
"Dissapointed. But I could never be upset with you, not over this," I said, laughing to prove their were no hard feelings. "But don't think you're getting out of this date. Definite rescheduling."
She let out a small giggle. "Next Saturday should be free."
"I have to wait another week?" I said, whining over the phone lines.
"I'm sorry," she sighed again. "It's just, this thing that has come up, um, it, well, it's going to take up the entire week. But next Saturday. Next Saturday, um, I should be free."
"Meredith, you're a mystery. An amazingly beautiful mystery," I said, laughing softly.
There was a pause on the other line and then, "I'm sorry, Derek. I know you want to know me."
"And I know you want to take things slow," I told her, smiling and nodding encouragingly even though she couldn't see me.
"It's driving you crazy isn't it?" she giggled.
"Oh just slightly," I told her laughing. "But I think you're probably worth it."
"How do you know?" the nervousness was back in her voice, and I knew she was probably wringing her hands.
"Honestly, I don't know how I know," I said, sighing into the phone. "I just do. Sometimes you have to take things on faith, Mer."
"How do you know if this is real?" she asked. "How do you know what's real or not when you take things on faith? What if I disappoint you?"
"I don't know Meredith, that's part of the fun. You take a chance and hope to god," I told her honestly. "But this...this is real. There's no way you'll dissapoint me."
She giggled a little and then stopped. "Derek, could you hold on for just a second?"
"Of course," I said wondering what was going on on her end. I smiled as I pictured her, holding the phone up to her face, walking around the room and fidgeting with everything she could touch.
"Derek?" she came on the line, suddenly sounding stressed and worried. "I have to go. I'll um, see you on Saturday, right?"
"You will. You have the directions," I told her.
"Yeah, I do," she confirmed, suddenly sounding distracted. "Bye, Derek."
"Bye Mer. Can't wait to see you," I said, hanging up the phone and wondering yet again what had pulled her away this time and hoping she's stop pulling away soon. I was falling in love with her and still knew so little about her, because she always pulled away.