Hey! I am so super sorry that its taken me so long to update. I really am. Seriously. Okay, I'll go ahead and do the chapter, Review, Review, Review!
A/N: I don't own anything, No Addison.
"I cant believe you're getting married." Meredith said as she pulled her scrubs over her head.
"I cant believe you're pregnant." Cristina shot back as she put on her scrubs and glanced at the small bump on Meredith's abdomen.
"Well, at least I'm in a relationship, unlike you were when you got pregnant."
"I was in a relationship."
"Sort of. Not really like you are now."
"I guess. Whatever."
"Marriage is a big step. Commitment."
"Don't talk about the C word in front of me."
"Still having problems with that concept?" Izzie said bouncing in, already in her scrubs.
"You're here early." Cristina and Meredith said in unison.
"I love getting a head start on the day!" Izzie said cheerfully, checking her hair in the mirror. Meredith quickly pushed her out of the way so that she could pull her hair up into her normal messy bun.
Cristina and Meredith exchanged a look as Izzie gave them a huge grin.
"Did you have good sex last night?" Cristina questioned Izzie.
"Yes, but that's not why I'm happy."
"Are you pregnant?"
"Nope."
"Engaged?"
"Nope."
"Did you get to scrub in on a really cool surgery?"
"Nope."
"Then why the hell are you so happy?" Cristina said angrily.
"Because Alex said he was commited"
Cristina gave Meredith a look.
"I know, the C word." Meredith said grabbing her coat and heading out the door.
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"How's my favorite expectant mother?" Derek said sneaking up behind Meredith, who was getting coffee.
"That's all I am now? An expectant mother? I'm not a great fiancée, or a good bedmate, or a great friend, I'm an expectant mother?"
Derek winced. "Harsh. You're everything to me."
Meredith took a sip of her coffee and gave him a smile.
"What is that?" Derek said motioning to the cup in her hand.
"Coffee."
Derek grabbed the cup and threw it into the nearby garbage can.
"What the hell Derek? That's my freakin coffee. How else am I supposed to stay awake?"
"You're pregnant. Coffee is bad for the baby Meredith!"
Derek placed his large hand on her slight bump, and bent down to say something to the baby.
"You don't want your mommy drinking coffee, do you? No, you don't. You don't want your mommy to drink something that is so clearly off limits while she is pregnant. What was that?" Derek said putting his ear to her stomach. Meredith smiled and stroked his hair despite how silly they looked.
"You're welcome. Yes, I love you too. Goodbye baby."
"What are you doing Dr. Sheperd?" Chief Webber said as he walked by Meredith and Derek.
Derek straightened up and looked at the Chief. "I was just, talking to my baby. It was very glad that I didn't let Meredith drink coffee this morning." Derek said with a straight face.
Meredith nodded as the chief looked in her direction. "That is a lovely tie Dr. Webber." Meredith commented as Dr. Webber's pager went off. Dr. Webber gave the couple a last strange look before rushing off in the direction of the Ors.
Meredith and Derek burst into fits of laughter as the Chief disappeared. "Did you see his face?" Meredith said between laughs. "Wow, I have never seen him so uncomfortable." Derek commented.
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Izzie sat in the closet as she looked down at the small picture in her hand. Hannah. Her daughter was twelve today. Gosh. Her picture was a few years older, but she missed her. Looking back on it, she wasn't sure if she had made the right decision. She loved her job though, and keeping Hannah wouldn't have let either of them have a normal or prosperous life. She remembered today like it was yesterday.
12 Years Ago
"Izzie, you're enormous." Kyle said as he looked at the blonde girl leaning against the car.
"I'm nine and a half freakin months pregnant Kyle. I don't look normal because I'm fat and pregnant." Izzie said clutching her huge belly. She had really gained a lot of weight, and all in her midriff.
"You know I didn't mean it like that. You just look…pregnant." Kyle said sweetly offering a hand to touch the bulge that had become of Izzie's tight abs.
"Izzie, when were you due?" Jade said with a smile.
"Two days ago." Izzie responded. "The baby just doesn't want to come out. I've tried everything, walking around, everything."
"Well, maybe today's the day." Curt said with a smile as he wrapped his arms around Izzie. Curt was nice, not the baby's father, but a guy who had come in and been involved through Izzie's pregnancy after John had left her during her sixth month. He was sweet, but he didn't know that Izzie was giving the baby up for adoption, and he was a little bit clingy. It was strange, no one had even looked her direction during her pregnancy. So many girls at her school were pregnant that it wasn't uncommon.
Izzie smiled, and then that smile turned to a look of horror as she felt a gush of water run down her legs and into her jean legs.
"Holy crap." She said as everyone looked towards her.
"What is that?" Curt asked.
"My water, just broke. I'm having the baby."
14 hours later
"Izzie, you have to push."
"I don't wanna. It hurts so bad."
"Izzie, I know you're scared, but this is important." Said the doctor as she pried Izzie's closed legs open.
"I don't wanna push. I don't wanna have a baby. I don't wanna. Please make it stop. Please make it stop hurting."
"Izzie, if you push it will all be over. Everything, this fucking pregnancy, and your freakin swollen ankles, not to mention all the weight, everything will be gone." Her mother said as she took a sip of the beer that she held.
Izzie cringed at her mother. She was so hurtful sometimes.
"Izzie, you have to push." An urge came over Izzie and she just gave it her all and was swept away on a wave of pain that pushed through her body.
Present Tense
It had been twelve years since she had pushed and pushed and pushed. The pain was unforgettable, and she could still remember how she felt when she first held Hannah Elizabeth. It wasn't a name that she had picked out. She was going to call the baby Riley Lynne. But it wasn't up to her, it was up to the adoptive parents. A tear rolled down Izzie's face, and she kissed the picture. It was for the best. She couldn't handle a twelve year old right now.
The door jiggled and Izzie folded the picture quickly. Alex unjammed the door and opened it quickly.
"Izzie, what are you doing? Why are you crying?" He asked sitting down by her and wrapping his arms around her tightly.
"Its nothing Alex, it really isn't."
"Well, I think it is, or else you wouldn't be crying."
"Its just an anniversary, just an anniversary that's sad."
"You can tell me. I wanna know. I wanna be involved. I'm putting forth effort, commitment here."
Izzie didn't know if she could tell Alex. No one knew, and it was a skeleton that she wasn't sure that she wanted to bring back to the surface.
"I have a daughter." Izzie found herself saying.
"I had a daughter." She corrected herself.
"What happened?" Alex said quietly, and sensitively.
"I was sixteen, and I got pregnant. I gave her up for adoption. Today's her birthday." Izzie handed Alex the picture. "Her name is Hannah."
"She's beautiful." Alex said quietly, mostly to himself. Alex almost felt his eyes fill up, but he hid his sorrow.
Obviously not well enough.
"Whats wrong Alex? You look like you were going to say something."
"No, not really."
"I just told you about Hannah, you can tell me whatever. Remember the whole putting forth effort speech you just gave?"
Alex sighed slowly. "Okay. You may think that I'm some ass after I tell you this, and back then, I was. I really regret what I did, and if I could change it, I would."
"Okay, its fine Alex. Just tell me, I mean the past is the past."
"Yeah, well, you don't wanna hear my past."
"Alex…" Izzie said quietly.
"I was in my senior year of high school. It was Valentine's Day and I was walking with my girlfriend back home from the winter festival. I was so excited because I had just gotten early acceptance to Iowa State. It was snowing outside, and it was a beautiful sight. I was holding her hand and we walked up to my truck to drive home. She squeezed my hand and told me she loved me before telling me that she was six weeks pregnant."
"Oh, Alex."
"Yeah. It was so tough. But I stayed. I stayed with her even when she waddled up on the stage to get the diploma that she had barely earned. She was going to keep the baby. And I was the father, she thought. I pretty much knew that I was. So I stayed. And then, August rolled around, and she was nine months pregnant. She had the baby girl the day before I left for college. But I left. I didn't stay. I abandoned her. Two years later, I was feeling guilty as hell and I went home for Christmas. I saw Ellen and our daughter, or so I thought. She had me take a paternity test, and it came out negative. The "daughter" that I had left and the girl that I thought I had gotten pregnant weren't even mine, and even though I had made a bad choice, a bad choice. It hurt. It really did."
"Oh, Alex, I'm so sorry."
"Yeah. I am too."
Izzie leaned her head on Alex's shoulder and took his hand in hers.
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"George, wait up!" a young voice sounded from behind George.
George turned around to face Callie. He didn't even say anything as she took his hand. He didn't even know what to say.
The rain pounded the table as they sat around not looking at each other, but each wanting to say something.
"I'm sorry." It came out of Callie's trembling lips, about to cry again.
"I know." George said quietly.
"You forgive me?"
"I forgive you, but I don't know if I love you."
"I love you." Callie whispered softly.
"Well, sometimes even love isn't enough." George said, even though it hurt him, and he walked upstairs solemly, and alone.
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Okay, so I know it probably sucked, but its updating! Lol, okay, read and review!
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