How Hard Is It To Choose A House Maid?

Okay! Here's Chapter two of 'The House Maid'. Hope you like! Its pretty funny…well I think so! Okay! Oh! And thanks to Meiza who was the first to review on my story! One chapter and already a review! I feel so special! Sorry kinda hyper now! Oh and yeah I got my own weird and unique way of writing, so some stuff might be off a little! Sorry if I confuse any readers if any of you have any suggestions on how to make my writing style better and more understandable…do not be afraid to type it in an e-mail or review! Thanks! And now onto the story! One more itty bitty thing...just to let you younger readers know there will be mild swearing in this chapter...just two words...just wanted to say that just in case. Okay! Now...I'm done.

'When a sentence is written like this it means the character is thinking'

"When a sentence is written like this it means the character is talking"

(Sorry had to clear that up!)

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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"WHAT!" exclaimed everyone except for Suzuka.

"Why!" asked Rinku.

"Because, everyday it's the same old thing! I clean up Chu's mess, make breakfast, lunch and dinner! I even make a special dessert! But is there ever any Thank You's! NO!"

"Drama Queen," mumbled Shishi.

"I say thank you" replied Touya.

"I know you say thank you Touya…AND I AM NOT A DRAMA QUEEN! I just feel so under appreciated! That's when it hit me! We could hire someone to do the house cleaning for us!"

"IDIOT! We're demons! We can't just get a human housemaid!" exclaimed Shishi.

"Too bad! We'll just have to play it cool! Besides…I put up flyers yesterday." Replied Suzuka as he did his infamous nose turned up arms crossed pose.

Three hours later…

Suzuka was busy cleaning up the last of Chu's barf when it dawned on him about Jin's appearance.

"If we do hire a house maid…what are we gonna do about Jin's horn?" asked Shishi.

'What about meh' horn?" asked a groggily Jin who apparently looks as if he just woke up.

"We're hiring a house maid!" replied Rinku cheerily.

"WHAT!" exclaimed a wide eyed Jin.

"Ey'! What's with all the ruckus mates?" asked a now awake Chu.

"We're getting a house maid" replied Touya.

"WHAT! ARE YEH' CRAZY! WHAT IF THE SHEILA FINDS OUT WE'RE DEMONS!" exclaimed Chu.

"How do we know if it's going to be a she?" asked Touya

"You want it to be a guy huh Touya? I always knew you were like that" replied a now smirking Shishi.

"I AM NOT LIKE THAT AND YOU KNOW THAT!" exclaimed Touya.

Whatever you say Touya…anyways she or he," said Shishi as he looked in Touya's direction, "won't find out as long as we play it cool! Starting off with Jin's horn!" replied Shishi.

"You are not cutting off meh' horn!" said Jin as he protected his 'precious horn' with his hands.

"Calm down Jin! I am not going to cut off your horn. I'm just going to give you a potion that will make your horn invisible to the human eye" explained Suzuka.

Jin pondered the situation for a moment and reluctantly agreed. (Aww…Jin's trying to think…How cute!)

"Alright! But if meh' horn is gone along with meh' powers…yer gonna pay Suzuka!"

"Alright, alright, now quit your nagging and eat this."

Suzuka handed Jin a spoonful of some icky green stuff. Jin…hesitantly took the spoonful of the mysterious green concoction and…ate it.

"HOLY MOTHER OF --- THIS TASTES LIKE CRAP!" exclaimed a now gagging Jin.

"How do you know what crap tastes like?" asked Rinku.

"Ah've had meh' encounters…" replied Jin looking the other way.

There was an awkward moment of silence…as everyone stared at the wind master green faced (Or ready to puke)…when…

DING! DONG!

"Alright everyone, that's the first intern! So…uh…behave!" Suzuka said as he opened the door to reveal…

A somewhat masculine looking woman, who looked like she was the weight lifting champion for women! She wore the classic black French maids' outfit which was EXTREMELY tight enough to show her ripped biceps on her arms and six pack…

"Uh…come right in," replied a rather shocked Suzuka. 'Is it even possible for a woman to have muscles like that?'

Fast Forward to Interview:

"So…your name's Helga?" asked Suzuka.

"Yah! My name HELGA!" she replied in a Swedish accent.

"So what's your concept on house keeping?" asked Touya.

"Oh! Simple! Ah' clean, Ah' cook und wash clothes! Und Ah love da schmell of underwear…clean or dirty, especially men's underwear." She said as she winked at a now disgusted Touya.

" Uh…," Suzuka seemed at loss for words," It says in your résumé that you were once a 500 pound weight lifting champion for women?"

"Oh YAH! Look at my muscles! I show demonstration Okay!"

"No that's not necessary --- OH GAWD! PUT ME DOWN!"

Helga had managed to lift up the couch that the six demons were sitting on with one hand. All six demons stared wide eyed at the weight lifting champion hoping she wouldn't drop them…

(Although I'm pretty sure that all six demons put together don't weight anything near 500 pounds but oh well!)

"Okay…what about home cooked meals?" asked Touya who was now down to earth along with the others.

"Oh yah! I cook a lot of meat, beans, spinach and BROCCOLI!"

"Uh…broccoli?" asked a confused Touya.

"OH YAH! I cook a lot of BROCCOLLI! Und when Ah eat broccoli Ah say…BROCCOLI! UND AH AM HELGA! UND AH AM GOING TO EAT YOU!" exclaimed Helga as she grabbed some broccoli from her purse and started eating it viciously.

All six demons just watched wide eyed…

"Well…thank you Helga! Don't call us we'll call you!" said Suzuka as he started pushing Helga out the door.

"Und WAIT!" exclaimed Helga as she smashed Suzuka's face with her hand and practically knocked him out, "Call me when you need a real WOMAN…big boy," and with that said she handed Touya HER phone number…along with grabbing Touya's butt before she left.

"Yeah! Yeah! Goodbye!" Suzuka said as he slammed the door.

Jin was in a fit of hysterics at what happened to poor Touya.

"Eh' mate! Looks like you got yourself a date! AHA! HA! HA! HA! HA!" replied Chu laughing as well.

Everyone was laughing their asses off! Jin was rolling around on the ground laughing Chu was laughing head high. Shishi was snickering on the couch and so was Suzuka who was snickering by the door. And poor Rinku looked completely grossed out.

"WE ARE DEFINITELY NOT HIRING HER!" yelled a rather angry Touya.

"Alright…heh heh heh…alright. We won't hire her. Now let's see who'll come next," said Suzuka.

15 Minutes Later:

DING! DONG!

"Oh. Here's our next intern," said Suzuka.

Suzuka opened the door to reveal a tall woman with huge glasses and a pointy nose and outrageously long curly hair. She had an outrageous outfit that was a mixture of a long floral print blouse, ripped up bleached jeans and you could see knee high striped socks underneath the jeans. And last but not least her shoes…they were the most worn out ugly brown boots you ever did see.

(Yeah, as for the new chick…I'm not gonna give her a name cuz I have no clue what to name this new character! Okay! She'll just be known as the crazy lady or the outrageously fashioned woman…or anything that has to do with crazy! Okay! I just wanted to clear that up!)

"Uhh…" said Suzuka as he blinked twice.

Fast Forward to Interview:

"So…uh…what's your status on a clean house?" asked Touya.

"Oh…I make sure that there is not a SPECK of dust anywhere…ANYWHERE!" replied the outrageously fashioned woman as her eye twitched.

"Well…I guess that's good, so---," but before Touya could finish his sentence he was interrupted by the woman.

"OH MY GAWD! IS THAT A SPECK OF DUST! GET IT AWAY! GET IT AWAY FROM MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" replied the frantic crazy woman as she desperately tried to swat at the so-called speck of dust.

The six demons watched in disbelief as they watched the insane woman swat at the air like a mad man…or should I say mad woman?

'Cough' "You're crazy!" 'Cough', was Shishi's reply.

Then the delirious woman rushed over to Shishi and started shaking him furiously all the while yelling at him really fast…

"YOUTHINKI'MCRAZY!DON'TYOU!DON'TYOU!YES!YESYOUDO!DON'TLIE!YOU'RELYING!I'MNOTCRAZY!I'MNOTCRAZY!"

(Translation: YOU THINK I'M CRAZY! DON'T YOU! DON'T YOU!YES! YES YOU DO! DON'T LIE! YOU'RE LYING! I'M NOT CRAZY! I'M NOT CRAZY!")

"LADY! GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!" screamed Shishi.

"Oh…I'm sorry. Now…who wants a cup of tea?" replied the woman smiling rather creepily…not to mention her eye was twitching.

The six demons looked at each other…

SLAM!

(That means they slammed the door in her face! Just wanted to let you people know that!)

"WE ARE NOT HIRING HER EITHER!" exclaimed Shishi.

"Looks like Touya and Shishi are the only one getting anything outta this…"said Chu.

"What's that supposed to mean!" asked Shishi who was pretty angry.

"I think the crazy Sheila liked ya mate!" exclaimed Chu as he started laughing.

"Oh shut-up!" said Shishi through gritted teeth.

DING! DONG!

"Oh gawd! Please let it be a normal lassie!" prayed Jin.

Suzuka opened the door to reveal…yet another mannish looking woman…this time she was wearing a police guard uniform.

'Oh great' thought Suzuka.

Fast Forward to Interview:

"Yeah! So I cook, I clean and I'm big on discipline!" with the word 'discipline' said, the manly voiced police guard looked over in Rinku's direction.

"Discipline?" asked a rather frightened Rinku.

"Yeah."

"So in your résumé its says you were a---," Suzuka was cut off…

"CODE RED!" exclaimed the police guard who tackled poor Rinku who was playing with a yo-yo.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Rinku.

SLAM!

"We're not calling her either," replied Suzuka shaking his head solemnly.

DING! DONG!

"DON'T ANSWER THE DOOR!" exclaimed a now hysteric and traumatized Rinku who was hiding underneath the couch.

"Hello?" said Suzuka as he opened the door cautiously.

" Hola! Estoy aqui por el trabajo de sirvienta! Cocino, limpio y ---,"

(Translation: "Hi! I'm here for the job of house maid! I cook, clean and ---,")

"Sorry! Not interested! Buh-bye!" exclaimed Suzuka who now had a sweat drop the size of Texas on his head.

"What did that lady say?" asked Rinku, who now decided it was safe to come out from underneath the couch.

"Like hell if I know Rinku! I think she spoke Chinese!" said Suzuka as he threw his arms up in the air.

"It was Spanish you moron," mumbled Touya.

"Whatever!" said Suzuka.

"I say you should call it quits, Suzuka," said Shishi.

"Yeah. You're right," replied a defeated Suzuka.

DING! DONG!

Suzuka probably for the last time…opened the door…

"Sorry! But the job for a house maid is ---,"

Suzuka stared wide eyed at the sight in front of him…

CLIFFHANGER!

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Woot! That's it for chapter two! I know it was really long! But it was fun to type! Oh and the whole Spanish speaking woman…hopefully none of you took it offensively! Cuz the truth is I'm Mexican too! Although my Spanish sucks (I had help from my mom)…so if I wrote something wrong I'm sorry! Hopefully I didn't offend any readers and if I did I'm sorry! Ok! Chapter three might be up tomorrow okay! And thanks to all who reviewed!

Yeah Chapter three might be a little delayed…I still got to get all the details straight and stuff! Ok!

Kat