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Chapter 10

Tara sat on Dawn's small porch that next morning. Her head wasn't swimming as bad as the night before and she was glad. She knew that she had caused a lot of trouble for Buffy and Willow, thus had arrived at a decision. Her plan was to help fix the slayer problem and then walk away from both women. She knew that this could be called the coward's way out but she did not want to hurt either woman over the other.

Buffy and Willow had shared a deep bond and it was foolish of her to think that she could get involved with Buffy and not have Willow get hurt. Now that she had ventured into an involvement with Buffy, she couldn't expect Buffy to not get hurt if she picked Willow. She had made up her mind two days ago that she would remain with Buffy and a big part of her wanted to stick with that decision. There was another part of her that wanted to be with Willow and she could not deny that fact. She supposed that the part of her that wanted to be with Willow was the part that still dwelled in the past and the part that wanted Buffy was the part that wanted to live for the future.

No matter the reasons for her feelings, they couldn't be denied or ignored in fairness to the three women. Tara was not the type of person to ignore her feelings and certainly not the type to purposefully inflict pain on another person. She put her hands over her face and lowered her head in disgust at the pain she was causing the two women. "Hey T," Faith said and took a seat next to her. "I think I have the answer to your problems."

Tara looked up at the dark slayer with a look of disbelief. She didn't know Faith very well but, from what she'd heard, Faith was not into using communication. She also was not the best go to person when you needed a problem solved if her past track record was to be taken into consideration. "How do you figure that?" Tara asked in a weary voice.

"Well first of all, I know that you have a long history with Red. I know that you were starting a new history with B and that it hit a snag. Between the two of us," Faith looked at Tara for a confirmation that she would not repeat this conversation and got one with a smile from the pretty blonde. "I've had feelings for B for a long time. I screwed it all up when we were younger and now we could never be together. If B is with me, she will always be reminded of what she gave up and I can't do that to her. If she moves on with someone new, she gets a chance at that normal life that she used to whine about wanting so bad. She can start over fresh with you Tara and not have to be reminded of what she once was and who she was forced to become by whomever gives out the rules of how this all works."

Surprisingly, what Faith said made perfect sense to Tara. The problem was what to do about Willow and her feelings. "So do you have a handle on the Willow aspect of this?" Tara enquired with gaining interest in what Faith had to say.

Faith leaned back in her chair and smiled. "Sure I do or else I wouldn't have bothered to come out here. You're a meticulous kinda girl and won't leave anything unsolved from what I gather. So you and Red have this love for the ages and we all know it. The problem is that she damaged it severely by her brain lapses. So even if the two of you did hook back up and create some new memories, could you ever really forget all that crap? It was some heavy stuff from what I've heard and there is a chance that it would always be in the back of your head. Plus, with you, Willow would always be reminded of what she lost, same thing as B."

Tara pondered what the dark-haired slayer was saying and she had to admit that Faith had pegged the situation very well. These are the reasons that she had wanted to be with Buffy. In edition, Willow was displaying some of her old selfish characteristics when they first met up again. She only stopped acting like that when her world came crashing down with the loss of her supposed Goddess title and Giles' fate. "Is it fair to do this to Buffy Faith?" Tara asked with concern thick in her voice.

"B knows the situation Tara. She knows that seeing Red opened up some old wounds and deep feelings. She knew that you loved Red deeply when she got into this. She knows you enough to know that you would not get involved with her if you did not care for her also.

"I would never do that to her and I do hope that she knows that. I couldn't allow myself to get involved in a serious relationship for the longest time but it seemed easy to try it with her." Tara said thoughtfully. "I just don't want to hurt Willow because I do love her. I was honest with her though and told her that I was developing strong feelings for Buffy."

"Of course you were T," faith said and stood up. "Let's go inside and get some breakfast so that we can get this slayer problem out of the way. Then you can fix your love life problems and everyone can move on in the direction that they need to move in."

"Faith," Tara said quietly as she too stood up. "Thanks for the advice." She received a shrug from the slayer in the way of saying you're welcome, as they walked back inside.

- - - -

After eating a virtually silent breakfast, the gang got ready to get the spell started. "D, you said that there might be another way."

"Well, if these two could modify the spell to where all current slayers powers are reduced slowly at a certain time, we can get the line restored. It would make sense to try it this way and not have to mess up a bunch of girls." Dawn was proud of her idea for two reasons. One, it would help the current slayers and the other was that Willow and Tara would get to work together. She thought that this might help bring back enough memories of what once was to aid them in their efforts of reconnecting.

"That would serve a better purpose than to just yank it away from all of them in a flash." Buffy agreed solemnly. Though she freaked when her powers began to diminish, she felt that it would have been better that way rather then waking up with nothing in a flash. "This way, we have time to prepare the girls that they can go on with their normal lives soon if they decide to get out of the fight for the good of mankind."

"I can fix the spell but I think that Tara should be the one to go back." Willow said in a frank tone. She had enough of botching up things to last her a lifetime and she didn't want to do it again.

"No," Tara said sternly. "We cannot tinker with the spell in any fashion. Willow also has to go back since she was the leader of the spell."

"I guess then if anyone has a problem with dealing with their power outage," Xander looked around the room thoughtfully. "We send them to Tara."

"I don't think it will happen in a split second." Tara added and gave Xander a funny look. "I think that we should take a couple of hours and warn the girls of what's coming."

"If they need to talk I can handle that part." Buffy said but didn't think many of them would need to talk. They embraced their calling but many resented it. She knew that had they been called at the proper time rather then like they were, it would have gone differently. Most of these girls were in college and starting their lives or to young to be taken from their families, which made her fairly certain that there wouldn't be many complainers.

"Let's get that done then." Faith said and stood up with Dawn and Andrew.

"Faith wait," Tara said softly. "You and Willow will have to go back, she's going to need someone to watch over her projected form. I need to stay here and anchor her and Buffy can go with the others to make the calls."

- - - -

Everyone sat down to dinner that evening. The consoling many happy and few sad slayers had taken most of the day while the actual time traveling took merely an hour. Everyone was tanked from the long day's events and ready to relax. There was other business at hand for Tara but she didn't know if she should do it tonight as Willow looked absolutely drained.

"So Red, you wanna go get some ice cream?" Faith asked having remembered that the girl loved ice cream as a stress reliever back in high school. She knew that what Tara needed to do was going to be hard and thought that she might try to help her out.

"That sounds good actually." Willow said with a slightly disappointed look on her face. She had wished Tara was the one asking but was glad that someone thought enough of what she had to do to ask. "Let me just get freshened up a bit and then we can go."

As the room cleared, Tara looked over at Buffy. "Faith and I had a talk this morning." Tara began with a hint of nervousness in her voice. "There are some things that I would like us to discuss but if you want to wait…"

"No," Buffy said quickly. "Let's get this out so that we know where each other stands. It's driving me crazy here Tara but I'm trying hard to respect your feelings." Buffy folded her hands on her lap and prayed that she didn't come across as to harsh.

"I think that it's driving us all crazy Buffy." Tara said with a look of sadness creasing her features. "I love Willow dearly and I think that you know that Buffy."

Buffy steeled herself for what she knew was coming. She wouldn't show Tara her hurt and disappointment because this had to be hard enough on the kind woman. Buffy had told her before that she would not do anything to purposefully hurt her and she meant it. "Of course Tara," she said softly. "You have a big heart that is so kind to others and that is why I grew attracted to you. I wouldn't believe that you were the real Tara Maclay if you were able to get Willow totally out of your heart. My question is if you do not choose Willow, will you have room to fully love another?"