Honeymoon?
Chapter 11- Splinters and Laughter
A/N: This is just a small, comedy chapter.
"OW!" Sara screamed as she ran back into camp from the woods.
"Sara, what is it? What happened?" Gil asked running over to Sara.
"I was going to the bathroom when-"
"Were you bitten? By what, a snake, a spider, a-"
"No."
"Then what?"
"I got a frickin' splinter."
"So…"
"I can't get it out." He gave her a confused look. "It's in my ass." She whispered into his ear. He couldn't hold it back any longer, he started to laugh. "It's not funny!" She yelled and got the attention of all her fellow CSI's. They turned around and presumed their card game. She went back to whispering, "can you get it out?"
"I would love to but…" He showed her his right hand that was bandaged from the fight with Chuck. "I kinda can't."
"Gil, what am I supposed to do?"
"Have Greg or Nick get it." He said almost ready to burst into hysterics again.
"What!" She yelled and Greg and Nick looked over at them again.
"Well, either that or wait for Catherine to get back from town to get it out."
"It hurts." She said rubbing her ass.
"Then I suggest that you go ask one of them." Gil said mentioning to the two boys playing cards by the fire pit. She started walking over to them. "Are you seriously going to ask them? I mean I didn't think you would actually have them pull a splinter out of your ass. I thought you would wait for Catherine."
"Well, I would but my ass hurts too much." She continued to walk over to them and Gil started laughing again. She gave him an evil glare from over her shoulder. "Hey, I have a question for you." They looked at her and put their cards down. "Well, this may sound weird but my ass is in some serious pain from-"
"Wow, hold on here. I don't want to hear about what you and Griss do at night, so you can just forget it." Nick said from his spot on the log.
"It's not that."
"Jeez, Nick." Greg said hitting him over the head.
"Will you let me finish!" She screamed at them. They went dead silent and looked at her. "I'm sorry this is just really, really embarrassing." They looked at her to continue. "I need help getting a splinter out." She confessed.
"Is that it? Come here." Nick said and they both stood up wanting to help.
"It's in my butt." She finished and Nick sat down.
"Greg you pervert." Nick said.
"Well, she needs help and this could be the only time she lets me touch her ass."
"That's why I would feel better if you did it, Nick. You're like a brother to me and it wouldn't be so awkward."
"For you, maybe." Nick complained. Gil came over, now that he was done laughing, and joined in the conversation. "Gil, do you hear what your wife is asking of us?"
"Ya."
"Don't you want to do anything about it?" Nick argued.
"Well I can't remove it and she can't sit down until it's out, so I think she needs it out as soon as possible."
"Well…"
"Well what?"
"Do you really want Greg or me touching her ass?"
"As long as you are removing a splinter, I don't mind."
"So who is going to help?" Sara asked, looking pathetic.
"I'll do it!" Greg said.
"Of course you will, Greg. Well come her and get it, 'cause these other men can't do it." Greg walked over to Sara and Gil shook his head as Sara put her hands on his shoulders for support.
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(Tuesday, later that day)
"Sara, I brought you breakfast." Sara lifted her head off her pillow and looked at Gil standing before her, holding a tray. He sat down on the side of the bed and set the tray down between him and her. "Breakfast I bed for the mother of my child."
"Awww, you're so sweet." Sara sat up and gave him a light kiss on the cheek.
"Eat up." She picked up a piece of toast and took a bite. "Sara?" She looked up from her breakfast. "Have you made an appointment with your doctor yet?"
"Ya." He looked at her with his sad face. "Well, the first one was just to make sure I was pregnant, and I have one scheduled for…" She dropped her toast and sat up fully. "Oh my god! What time is it?"
"Ten." Gil said looking at the bed side clock.
"Oh my god." Sara jumped up from the bed and ran into the bathroom.
"Sara, are you ok? Are you sick again?" Gil followed her into the bathroom.
Sara jumped into the shower and poked her head out of the curtain. "I have a doctor's appointment in an hour."
"Oh." Gil started towards the shower.
Sara poked her head out again. "I would love for you to join me, but we don't have time. We both have to be ready in forty-five minutes so we can be on time. That is, if you are coming with me."
"Of course I will." He let their lips touch softly before he walked away from the shower. She stood there smiling and Gil turned around. "Forty-two minutes." Sara shut the curtain and continued her shower.
(Sorry, kinda short)
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"Sara, just remember, only two more days and we can go home." Gil told a really pissed off Sara.
"Good, because that was a little more bonding than I wanted." Sara said when she winced as she sat down.
"Still sore?"
"Greg was not gentle when he took out that splinter." She mopped.
"That was because we were all laughing to hard to pay attention to what we were doing." He said truthfully.
"Shut up."
Catherine, Warrick, and Brass pulled up in the car and parked next to the tents. When they made it to the group sitting around playing cards Sara gave Greg and Nick a look that said 'don't say a fucking word'. She then turned to Gil and gave him a look that said 'if you talk, you get no sex for a month'. Grissom rolled his eyes and looked back at his deck.
"Hey, did we miss anything?" Brass asked as he sat down and looked at Greg's cards.
"No." They were all too quick to answer.
"I think that means yes." Catherine said looking at Greg. "I know you want to talk, Greg." She said evilly. His smile grew and he raised the bet to distract himself. He shook his head and Catherine moved on to Nick. "Come on Nick."
"Sara came into camp asking if Greg or I could-" He started.
"Nick!" Sara cut him off.
"Pull a splinter out of her ass!" Greg finished for Nick, not looking up from his cards.
"Greg!" Sara raged and everyone burst out laughing. "You two are so dead!" Sara tried to run after them but Gil grabbed her around the waist and struggled to keep her in his grasp as he laughed with the group. "Gil, let me go!"
"Sara, calm down." Sara sat down in a huff on his lap.
Twenty minutes later the laughter subsided and Warrick got up from the ground, where he fell from laughing to hard. "It's not that funny." Sara said in a huff.
"Sara, that is absolutely, positively hilarious!" Brass laughed out.
A/N: Hope you enjoyed and please press that pretty little review button!