Hello hello, my friends! By now, hopefully most of you have finished reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows and cried over the end of the series and the tragic deaths of so many awesome characters (WHY do my favorite characters always have to die?!), so I figure it is high time I posted a new chapter of this fic before I go on a Harry Potter fan fic writing rampage (and, believe me, I will)... So, without further ado, here is the next chapter! And you all know this, but I own nothing.

17. The Cost of Freedom

While reading the book that he received from Elizabeth, James managed to answer many of the questions he had been meaning to ask. She recounted everything that had happened when she was kidnapped by Barbossa, up until the death of Will and his return as the captain of the Flying Dutchman. James could not help but smile in amusement when he read that Elizabeth, the girl he had once almost asked to marry him, had become the Pirate King – her recollection of how this appointment came about amused him just as much, although, knowing Sparrow's unpredictable nature, he was not at all surprised at how things had turned out. He took to keeping the book with him at all times as he walked aimlessly about the ship, rereading its pages over and over, imagining that the woman who had written them walked at his side.

'And so, are you still the Pirate King?' he asked Elizabeth the next time they met. They were standing on the dock where they had met Jack in Tortuga so long ago. 'Good gracious, Elizabeth,' added James, scowling, 'this place is a mess… did you really have to land us here tonight?'

He did not add that the very thought of Tortuga made his stomach lurch uncomfortably; it reminded him all too much of the sorry state he had been in when Elizabeth had found him, disheveled, drunk, and fallen as far as could be imagined from the respectable man he had once been. The look of pity she had given him was what sparked the mad desire in him to raise himself back up in the world, to redeem himself in her eyes and the eyes of the rest of the world, at whatever the cost… James shook his head, realizing that it was no good crying over spilt milk, and that Elizabeth had hated him for what he had done, not admired his resulting promotion. He focused his thoughts back on the conversation he was having.

'Yes, of course,' said Elizabeth innocently with an evil glint in her eye. 'I'm trying to see if you really can hold off on the rum, even when surrounded by taverns…' James rolled his eyes and playfully shoved her in the shoulder – for some reason, he found it easier to tease her back when she was dressed as a pirate. 'But, yes, I do believe I am the Pirate King until the Brethren Court votes in a new one.'

James jumped aside as two men pummeling each other tumbled drunkenly off the edge of the dock. 'And you killed Jack Sparrow, did you?' James raised his eyebrows. 'Funny, I'd been so sure you were in love with him when I saw the two of you together…'

Elizabeth glanced up at James, her dark brown eyes meeting his sea-green ones. 'You might have been right,' she answered finally. 'I'm not quite sure why, but whenever I held Jack's compass, for some reason it pointed towards him, and not Will. The thing is, when I kissed him before I killed him, I didn't do it because I felt any real attraction for him… it was more just because I felt like I could kiss him, and not feel guilty. If that makes any sense,' she said with a somewhat embarrassed shrug.

James shook his head. 'You kissed him ere you killed him. How very Shakespearean.'

Elizabeth sighed impatiently. 'No, it's not like that… I think that what I always wanted was the freedom he had, that, well, pirate ability he had to completely disregard the rules when he had to. I kissed him because it was forbidden, not because I loved him, and I did it to prove to myself that I could break the rules too if I needed to. I had to prove it to myself, James, because I knew that the only way to save all of us was if I let the Kraken take Jack, and I knew that I'd have to be the one to kill him.' She threw her hands up in the air in exasperation. 'Oh, never mind.'

But it did make sense to James, in a strange way. He thought back to how he had felt when Jack had talked to him about freedom, and wondered, as he had so often wondered since he had met the pirate, if it was after all such a bad thing.

'He's a lot like you, actually,' Elizabeth said to James one night. It was a perfectly clear day, and the sea sparkled like diamonds in contrast to the intensely blue sky. They were sitting on a parapet of the fort, the exact one that Elizabeth had been standing on the day she fainted into the bay. 'He looks so much like Will, but something about him reminds me more of you.'

'Besides the name, I assume?' James swung his legs over the edge of the parapet so that they dangled off over the sea. Elizabeth gave him a worried look and opened her mouth to reprimand him, and then decided there was no use in doing so.

'Well, besides that. He's a very serious child for one thing, and he's determined to join the Navy when he grows up.'

James was interested. 'Really? Even though his mother is the Pirate King?'

Elizabeth gave a small chuckle. 'You didn't think I'd told him that, did you? He doesn't have the slightest notion that I'm a pirate. Or was, at least.' She shrugged. 'I'm beginning to think that I couldn't go back to that lifestyle even if I wanted to.'

'So you'd give up freedom for a dull, respectable life, then?' James wagged a finger at her. 'That means you've got to stop harping on about my career in the Navy, and that wig too.'

'There is more than one type of freedom, James, and I prefer to take the type that doesn't involve getting in life-threatening situations. I still never wear corsets, if that makes you feel any better. Plus, that wig really was hideous, and I think – '

'All right, all right.' James waved his hand in the air impatiently. 'You were saying he doesn't know you're a pirate – then how do explain Jack to him?'

'Jack.' Elizabeth rolled her eyes. 'I haven't seen Jack in over four years, and the last time I did it was when Jamie was far too young to remember. If Jack ever does come to visit, I shall be sure to drag him off to the local tavern or somewhere where we can have a reasonable discussion without Jamie hearing a word about pirates.'

'And Will?' James raised an eyebrow. 'How are you going to explain that?'

Elizabeth sighed. 'I'm not sure.' She glanced at James. 'See, I told Jamie that his father was a captain in the Navy who can only come from England to visit once every ten years.'

'You told him what?' James laughed. 'Elizabeth, I think it might have been more plausible if you had just told him the truth.'

'And had him become a pirate too?' Elizabeth shook her head. 'I don't want him to, James, try to understand that. It's too dangerous – pirates betray each other too readily, they stab each other in the back, they have no loyalty or honor…'

'Not like anyone we know, I suppose?' James meant it in jest, but Elizabeth turned on him, her eyes flashing.

'You've done it too, James. Don't blame me – I killed Jack because I had to. But you, you betrayed us for yourself.'

James looked down, hurt by the truth in her words. The two sat there in guilty silence for a moment before Elizabeth spoke.

'I'm sorry, James. I shouldn't have said anything.'

He tried to smile at her. 'You're right, of course. I should not have said anything either.'

'It's just…' Elizabeth paused, trying to find the right words. 'I'm always so afraid something is going to happen to him. And if something did happen, I don't know what I'd do, James. I think I might die. So that's why I would rather have him grow up and become an honorable naval officer than a pirate.'

'You'd sacrifice his freedom for honor, that is?'

Elizabeth looked him squarely in the face. 'If honor meant safety, I would. Wouldn't you?'

James shrugged. 'I don't know. I don't have to worry about it – I'm dead, you know.'

She sighed. 'Yes, I know. It's something that haunts me every day.'

'Really. I'm flattered.'

'Stop teasing me, James, or I'll push you off the parapet.'

'Let's just hope I'd be as lucky as you were that day.'

'That day.' Elizabeth stared off at the ocean for a moment. 'Ever wonder how it might have been if we had gotten married?'

The question caught him completely off his guard. 'What?'

'Well, have you?'

James shifted uncomfortably. 'Once in a while, yes.'

'Same here. Actually, I've wondered more than once what might have happened if I had just said yes to you that day… if I hadn't fainted and been rescued by Jack, if I had never been kidnapped by Barbossa, if I'd never become a pirate, if none of this had ever happened…'

'You undoubtedly would have had a very boring and proper life, and I would have been very happy but just as boring and proper as I'd always been.' James chuckled. 'I actually think that in an odd way all this pirating business has been somewhat good for me … correct me if I'm wrong, but I think I've certainly become a good deal less boring than when you first met me.'

Elizabeth took his hand. 'Definitely. Apparently all of your father's doctrines about being emotionless and disliking pirates have faded away… well, all of them except the one about being honorable, that is…'

'I suppose it's no good worrying about it, it's all in the past,' said James a bit sadly. 'I doubt you would have said yes to my proposal anyway, since at the time you thought I was so boring, and you were madly in love with a certain young blacksmith, at any rate…'

'You never know. At that point in my life, I don't think I'd experienced freedom enough to realize I had options.' She stood up. 'I really wish you could meet Jamie, James. You two would like each other. Actually…' She blushed. 'I had a dream the other night that the three of us were back here, at the fort, in Port Royal. And you were teaching him how to sword fight. The two of you just looked so… so natural, fencing away with each other, and laughing. For a moment, I almost thought I was awake.' She sighed. 'And then Jack popped out of nowhere in a French maid outfit and offered me treacle and strawberry tarts, so I knew it wasn't real. I was really quite distressed when I woke up.'

'Once again, Jack Sparrow ruins the day. As always.'

'Oh, stop it!' Elizabeth snorted, playfully shoving him in the back. James, who had been about to swing his legs back over the edge of the parapet, was taken by surprise and lost his balance. Almost as if in slow motion, he fell towards the water, pulling his body into a graceful dive just before he hit the surface with barely a splash.

'James!' screamed Elizabeth as he disappeared into the murky black water. At that moment, she awoke, covered in sweat, chest heaving. After a moment of confusion, she recognized her surroundings and, wrapping her arms around her knees, began to sob quietly.