Disclaimer: omg, I own Shinu. And… and Ryu… that's about it…

Thank you for clicking this story again. I love my readers and reviewers.

Important!!!

I am going to have a busy time, if I am lucky enough I am going to write a story for a Demo of a new game… and if I am even luckier and people like the story and the Demo the actual game will be made…and I can play a game by my hands next year…

I update when I update

With love.

Flowing Tears

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"I don't want to get up."

"You really should…"

"I know."

"Gai wouldn't want to see you like this…"

With a jolt the Jounin sat up, bathing in sweat and breathing heavy. It had been three days since he last saw his lover, the day he kicked him out to take Shinu for a walk in the forest. Kakashi allowed himself to relax for a moment before he slowly moved to the side of the bed he occupied alone. Stretching, he groaned lowly before he looked to his side, staring into the mirror above the bed. His hair was a mess, and his right eye was bloodshed with exhaustion. The dark bags under his eyes were darker then normal and even his Sharingan seemed drained of energy. His skin seemed to have gotten paler from the lack of sun and nutrition. Shaving was also necessary.

He sighed softly, taking a good look at himself had busted his mood even more. He didn't feel like seeing a medic anytime soon, they just wanted to talk and tell him it was all about him, then drown him with drugs and everything would be fine until the depression would return.

He was finally standing up straight. The floor was cold to him, the air around him was cold. There must be a window open somewhere. Maybe he could forget his misery for a while if he took a shower, he needed to be cleaned. A shave would do wonders too, when was the last time he had done that?

…

"That's none of your business."

"I make it my business…"

"You don't care."

"I can pretend…"

Warm steam filled the bathroom as the cold water became hot. Dropping his razor into the sink, pleased with the result it had left Kakashi took one glance into the mirror. With yet another sigh he dumped the slightly wet towel on a small rack and stepped into the shower. Goosebumps thrilled over his entire body before the heat finally devoured him. He closed the small cabin, steam soon covering the glass door. Slowly bringing his head back he felt his hair absorb the water, until it had no other place to go but stream over his face.

Kakashi groaned one last time and sat down in a corner, water still pouring down on him. He felt safe in this cloud of steam that covered him from enemy sight. Looking at the door in front of him he followed the little drops of water moving over the glass, leaving a small trail behind where other drops could follow. Kakashi was dozing again, not noticing the movement behind the window. Like a black mass the movement stopped, holding still until the Jounin snapped out of his fantasy again.

Safe in his cloud of steam Kakashi gave the door a kick, glass shattering everywhere. Pulling his leg and bleeding foot back to allow the mist to leave through the whole, the black mass had vanished.

…

"I said no."

"I do not care…"

"Don't you understand what no means?"

"That I do, but I still do not care…"

"You really know how to make me angry."

"Who are you talking to…?"

Sitting down by the window Kakashi looked outside for a moment. The streets were empty and the air was quiet, as if life dared not to show itself, all signs of a bad omen. The Jounin sighed again and took a deep breath wondering where Gai was. Did he leave him again, like he had done years ago? If so, then why? What had he done to upset the Green Beast?

Who was he talking to?

"He left you…"

"Why? I thought he loved me…"

"He does not…"

"Then why was he so nice to me?"

"Itachi loves you…"

"Let him rot!"

"He is coming for you…"

…

Wondering what had happened to time and space, Kakashi slowly walked his way between the trees of the forest. Heavy steps followed him, Shinu stalking him like a loyal dog. There was nothing left of the dog, just a hump of muscles roaming the empty streets. Watching the beast he tried to remember, anything would do. His mind wasn't clouded, clear as ever. A slight buzz had started in the back of his head, slowly throbbing with his heartbeat. Even though he was the beast´s master, he felt content letting the beast lead the way. Every now and then it stopped to sniff a little piece of nature, rarely stopping in its tracks.

Shinu groaned from the back of its throat when Kakashi had stopped following it. The groan made him remember the night he was rescued, they were rescued.

He stayed still for a moment, letting the pain and confusion settle. He felt alone again, like many a time he had experienced. Kakashi rolled on his side, his ear on the ground. He smiled when heavy footsteps came his way. A wet tongue moved over a wound on his shoulder. The hound kneeled next to him, allowing Kakashi to throw his arm over its bony back, as well as half a leg. After a few tries the silver haired one was able to stay on the back of his pet without falling on the ground and his loyal beast carried him to where the sounds of water came from. Soon the thick line of trees thinned out, and the calm water came to view.

Finally made it.

With a loud groan and little grace the wolf kneeled on the rocky ground, and with even less grace Kakashi rolled on the ground. It took him some effort to get on his knees, but he was pleased they were next to the water. The Jounin coughed, just to get some slime and blood out of his throat. After a while he just gave up, he let out a deep groan and sat on his bottom on the cold ground. He leaned back, the sturdy fur of his new pet slowly warming his wet back a little.

The memories faded, along with the sorrow. Kakashi was pleased once more, feeling reborn after so little change. Deeply inhaling he allowed the remains of stress flow from his body, his nostrils filling with the sent of blood.

It had been so long since he last smelled that sent, too long.

"I wanted you to know what happened to him…"

Kakashi finally realised he was standing in a puddle of blood. There was a trail leading to one of the trees. The sent of blood mixed with a smell he knew very well. The Jounin finally found his voice, speaking with a cracking rasp.

"You killed him."

"You displeased Itachi by loving this male…"

"I don't care about Itachi!"

"You will learn to love…"

"You killed my lover."

"Itachi will sooth your pain…"

Itachi would sooth his pain? He wanted the black-haired male out of his life. The Jounin thought he was safe when he got home all those weeks ago. Kakashi allowed himself to sob the sorrow away, kneeling next to the chunks of flesh, guts and bones.

He failed to notice the movements behind him, Shinu breaking a few nerves and twisting bones, becoming a little more humanoid. The thick tail still between its legs to hold its balance. It broke its jaw and attached it back together, the broken rows of little teeth filled with long white fangs.

As it adjusted itself a little more a red eye was slowly turned to him. The Sharingan wheel rotated slightly, attempting to pierce the creature's soul.

"What the hell are you?"

"I am Terror, I am Pain. Gate guardian of hell, keeper of Deadside…"

"Guardian of what? What is Deadside?"

"There is no need for you to know…"

Another moan, a second groan before the beast turned and jumped away, giving the CopyNinja a chance to fight or run. Kakashi was still sobbing, one last tear rolling over his cheek. Pain of loss and anger pulsating though his body with his heartbeat. A puff of smoke, and he was back in his apartment.

Like a ghost Kakashi moved through the apartment. His mind dwelling with sorrow and lost memories, his depression making him cry. Through the tears he moved in search of his goals, kneeling next to a cupboard next to his bed. An Icha Icha fell onto the floor when he forcefully opened the first drawer. He left the book for what it was and wrapped a belt around his hips.

It had been a while since he last carried the belt, along with the weapons it held. With a forceful push he slammed the drawer shut and concentrated on the weapons in the drawer beneath it. The Jounin continued his work, equipping himself with weapons. Within a matter of minutes he had what he needed, along with some minor extras. He took one last breath and teleported himself back to the forest.

Silence was carried around by the wind. The smell of rotting flesh close by stung his eyes, along with more tears of sorrow. With a final sob he rubbed the tears dry and raised his mask over his face. Closing his Sharingan slowly he took another deep breath sliding his headband over it for cover.

"Boy… You must be sick of life…"

"Someone is going to die tonight."

"Brave little one…"

A pair of yellow eyes were staring at the him. Behind the cover of bushes Kakashi could only see their dreadful glow. The Jounin raised an eyebrow in surprise when the eyes turned, as if Shinu rotated his head 180 decrees. Then the eyes seemed to look up, their glow disappearing into the darkness.

The silent movement of four legs pushing of the ground were the first signs of their battle starting. Shinu had jumped away from its hiding, landing in front of the Jounin to show its opponent what he was up against.

"You're nothing and nothing's got you…I can see your fear, it's around you…Killing souls is the way I concur, without a death, we don't concur…"

The beast circled the Jounin, slow steps vibrating through the ground. Air was becoming stale, a mist was starting to gather, and Kakashi knew it was an unnatural mist.

"With your first step you will burn, into the hate you have learnt…"

The giant mouth of the beast kept still as the voice spoke. The beast still walking in circles but not looking at the Jounin. Its eyes were on the back of the head, but because the mouth was always turned to Kakashi there was no chance to lock stares.

"Killing souls is the way I concur, do you know the meaning of suffer?"

The beast stopped moving and jumped, launching its first attack at the CopyNinja. What happened in a matter of seconds, seemed to take hours.

Back on the battlefield, and Kakashi couldn't be happier…

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My cactus died…