(A/N I am sooo sorry guys! At the last minute I decided not to do the winner's perspective (Jacob) due to reading Eclipse. I decided he didn't deserve the honor. But as soon as I was about to chose the 2nd place winner, (Emmett, who had a resounding point tally of 9, while Jake had 12) I was struck by inspiration. And at the last minute I decided that I wasn't going to do anyone else's p.o.v. just yet.)

Bella's P.o.V.

I continued to scroll through the fan fictions, dazed with disbelief. There were dozens that I was afraid to click. Such as the rated MA ones. Edward wanted to check them out, but I suggested that that wasn't such a good idea. No need to get corrupted by evil fanfic.

"Bella . . . why did Alice tell you about this site in the first place?" Edward asked, curiosity barely hidden.

I shrugged. "She had a vision in lunch while you were talking to Coach Clapp. Then she got this maniacal grin on her face and told me to go on this site when I was bored and had the chance."

"Of all the times to have that vision and I wasn't there to see it,' he muttered, his eyes slowly turning darker.

"Well, it's all her fault for even giving me the idea."

He shook his head. "No, I could have stopped her from getting that far."

"Edward, it isn't your fault. Do you want to get out of this site now?" I asked gently. He seemed really upset.

He smiled but grabbed the mouse instead. "No, I want to investigate."

I hopped out of the chair to allow him to sit. He sat down gracefully and crossed his legs together like royalty. Figures; Edward even sat down beautifully. His long, pale fingers tapped across the table, impatient to find something good.

I looked away from his impatient form and picked up my aged copy of Vampire Kisses. I had a new book that Renee had sent me on my desk, but I didn't want to read it just yet. There wasn't anything that really pulled my interest about the cover. All it had was hands holding an apple; which made no sense when paired with the title, Twilight. I was going to ignore it until I was totally bored.

Just then, he stopped drumming his fingers. I looked up at him curiously. "Edward, did you find anything?"

"No," he said. "Go back to reading, I'll tell you when I find something good."

I frowned. His tone was too innocent. No way in heck was I reading this book when he was hiding something from me. I pretended to read when his back was turned, but secretly I kept my eye on the computer screen.

Edward's P.o.V.

I was shocked that they mentioned this on the site; I thought that that moment was private. My moment of utter weakness and self-hate was definitely worthy of privacy. And here they had it, right there on the computer.

They had how I felt when I left Bella. How crumpled up and alone and suicidal I had been. My one true moment of nothingness.

The title drew me in, as well as the summery. 'Edward's Survival: He left Bella, and everything left him. Common sense, feeling, the will to live. But somehow, he kept going. Against the blinding agony of loosing her seemingly forever. How did he survive? Read and find out!'

I clicked it. I was such an idiot ---a total glutton for punishment. Would what this fan fiction say have any truth behind it?

'Edward draped his hands around his knees. All he saw was her face when he closed his eyelids, and all he wanted to see was her face. But he couldn't. Not if he wanted her to live. He fought with the desire to see how she was doing; he thought it best if he didn't have any contact what-so-ever. He didn't want to ruin her life anymore then he already did.'

I stopped reading. So far, they had described exactly my thoughts and feelings when I was gone. Maybe this fan fiction was more trustworthy then the . . . what was the phrase the fan fictioners put it? Ah yes . . . lemons. It was more of a lime if anything. At least I think that's how they'd put it . . . unless it's a watermelon in disguise? I had no clue. I continued to read, intrigued.

'Nothing. Nothing else mattered to him then Bella. Existence was meaningless. Existence without her . . . he shuddered at the thought, knowing he was already living that nightmare. A self imposed nightmare, but a tortuous one.'

Correct. I marveled at their accuracy.

'She was the world; neigh, the UNIVERSE to him. He'd die to see her smile; he'd kill to see her look at him again. He'd consider it the highest privilege he ever had to sleep with her. Not in the way he always crawled in through her window, but in the human way. The way it could have been if he hadn't been bitten, if he had been born in this era. So he could stay with her. So this could never happen.'

Accurate to a T. I was impressed; I suppose not all fans were scary. I continued reading, feeling better about this.

'But she was gone, never to be with him again. He was making his family worry. Edward got up slowly and brushed past the Dumpster in the ally he was moping in. something caught his scent. Blood. Venom poured out of his mouth. He hadn't eaten in so long.

'He opened the Dumpster lid. There, in the back! Sustenance! He grabbed the box of used Maxi-pads in gleeful thanks. And began to feed.'

If I hadn't had more control, I would have screamed. MAXI-PADS?! So much for a more accurate fan fiction! Dammit . . . lay your trust in a fan fiction and it gets you! But I couldn't believe it; MAXI-PADS?!

Bella was echoing my own thought. "MAXI-PADS?! EDWARD, THAT'S….THATS…." she was speechless.

So was I.