Hey, a rare chapter, told from Pickles' POV! He has almost no choice except to visit his folks on the way to the Thirsty Dolphin. Please R&R!
Yes, I do borrow a few phrases from various episodes, because they sounded good
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
He decided to solve it like any other problem; make the best of things and get the hell outta there fast. Stop in, say hi, how ya doin' then bye, see ya. No more than fifteen minutes.
And if his douchebag brother tried anything, he'd strangle him with his bare hands and make him wish he'd never been born.
"Hey, uhh, Nathan? Think we could stop 'n see my folks real quick before we head on to the Thirsty Dolphin?" he asked the lead singer.
"Yeah. Sure," he said gruffly.
"Thanks."
He sat down to "enjoy" the ride and pulled a few dozen beers closer to him just in case.
An hour later
They parked the Hatredcopter in the middle of the street and Pickles got off and walked up to the front door of his parent's house.
There was a moments pause and then his brother answered the door. The sight of him made him want to forget the whole thing and get back on the douchebag copter.
"Hey, bro, what's up? Hey, mom! Dad! Pickles is here!"
He was yanked inside by his brother and his mother gave him a big disgusting hug and kiss.
"We thought you'd forgotten where we lived," said his father.
The house was the usual white and colonial style home he'd been raised in for the most part. The gouges in the wall and the plaster overs from when he'd punched his brother and missed were still there.
His real name was Nathaniel Hawthorn, but there was already a Nathan in Dethklok. His nickname had always been Pickles and that was what he went by.
"Ey,. uhh... long time no see, right? Well, we were on our way to some other place and thought we'd drop by and say hi... how's it goin... well it's been real fun! Gotta go now! Bye!"
He bolted for the door and was back on the Hatredcopter in no time. He immediately grabbed a bottle of liquor and downed half of it in one go.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It took them another twenty minutes to get close enough to the pub they were headed for, and the pilot advised that they park the copter otu of sight and sound from the Thirsty Dolphin so the Tribunal didn't know they were there.
They parked the copter on a helipad nearby reserved for the military and walked most of the way.
"Everyone knows you guys and the Tribunal knows me... at least I think they do. Anyway, we can't just walk in there. We need a plan," said Flame, gathering them all closer.
"So what do we do?" demanded Pickles.
Flame put a hand on their shoulders, one on Nathan's and one on Murderface's. They didn't protest. She formed a huddle and they began plotting.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
"You sure this is gonna work??" whispered Pickles.
"Positive. Nathan's voice is too recognizeable and Toki and Skwisgaar are too foreign. Murderface's speech impediment is too strong, so it's just us. Remember. Your name is Harry Derwent and I'm Nina, got it?"
"Mother douchebags," he muttered. This wasn't gonna work.
They both wore black trench coats, cheapies the band had agreed to purchase from a nearby store, along with temporary hair color (lasting about three weeks) and had agreed on fake names. Pickles had pulled his hair back into a dreadlock ponytail and shaved (something he hated doing) and done his eyebrows black; Flame had done her hair and eyebrows black.
All in all, their disguises sucked big time.
The Thirsty Dolphin was exactly as he had remembered it. Small, too noisy and smelling strongly of spoiled peanuts and piss.
"Over there, that's that guy from that picture," she hissed under her breath.
Over in the corner sat a stern-faced man in a military uniform. He didn't look too pleasant.
Pickles took a seat across from the man and pushed the folder the late Brutus Marril had left behind at him.
"Who are you? You're not Brutus," demanded the man.
"My name is Harry Derwentle. Brutus came down with a bad case of dead and told me to come and get his money, for his family. The pictures are in here, Douchebag," he said, before he could stop himself.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Uh, I mean, the photos are in here, uh, sir," he quickly corrected himself.
Over at another table, Flame was doing he rhardest to look inconspicuous. Pickles knew she had a scimitar under the trench coat in case he had any trouble. And he had Murderface's sawed off shotgun, so they were well armed.
The man took the folder and began flipping through the photos. They had taken them just moments before, posing in various activities aboard the Hatredcopter. Nathan playing an arcade game with Toki. Charles Ofdensen signing fake paperwork. A few of the copter itself. Stuff just for looks.
"These are quite enough. Fine. Here's Brutus' paycheck for the job. Tell his family he died well, whatever those freaks did to him. The Tribunal thanks you, from the very heart of Washington DC, Harry," said the man, and he saluted him and tipped the waitress. In a few more moments, he had walked off.
"Man, that was close!" he whispered frantically to Flame as they walked out of the pub.
"He said Washington DC. I've been there once before... and I bet I know where to find the Tribunal," she said out of the corner of her mouth.
They met up with the rest of Dethklok just outside the Hatredcopter. Pickles tossed some of the cash to Charles, some to Flame and pocketed the other half for himself.
"You look wierd with black hair," said Murderface.
Pickles too his hair down and tried rubbing the greasy black shit off his eyebrows with no luck. Flame's hair was now coal black and looked a bit like Nathan's, only thicker. They now looked almost as if they could be half related.
They all got back on board the copter and Pickles told them all how it had gone.
"Dude, Flame thinks she knows where the Tribunal has all their meetings."
"Really? Where?" asked Nathan.
Pickles looked each of his fellow band members in the face before telling them where Flame had in mind.
"Underneath the statue of the Lincoln memorial in DC."
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
PLEASE REVIEW!