Tracy: I love this story, among other things, so much that it makes my heart hurt. This is pretty much my favorite chapter so far, and I have a feeling the story's only going to get better from here.
Kelsey Rose: This is definitely my favorite chapter, too! Amber and Shelley both really break my heart sometimes. :(
It had been three days since the incident with Corny, and Shelley had kept her distance from both Corny and Amber. She wasn't too quick to go leaping back into either of their arms. Shelley had far too much pride for that. However, something had kept her awake, tossing and turning, each night, if only for an hour or so. Though she would rather die than admit wrongdoing, she still felt a certain tug in her chest each time she thought about the situation.
That would probably explain why she had just parked her car outside of Amber's house and gotten out, with something tucked beneath her arm. With her fingers occasionally fondling the pack of cigarettes in her long leather jacket's pocket, she walked up to the door, her expression vacant. She knew that Amber probably wouldn't be too happy to see her, but she had reminded herself time and time again that she didn't care. Sighing in slight exasperation, she knocked on the door, and stood, impatiently waiting for a response, from Amber, her mother, or whoever the hell happened to appear.
Amber heard the knock on the door, though at the moment, she didn't recognize it as that. Tammy was sprawled, stomach-down on her bed, studying her fingernails as she spoke, glancing up at Amber who sat absentmindedly at the vanity stool across the other girls, watching her friends blankly.
"Did you see him?" Tammy asked incredulously, before glancing at Lou Ann, then back at Amber. "I mean, he was just standing there flirting with her. It was like he didn't even see me standing there." Her voice was quiet, and her eyes connected with Amber's face. Amber kept her gaze blank, focusing on nothing in particular, and when Tammy got no reaction from the blonde, she averted her gaze to Lou Ann, who nodded sympathetically.
"Yeah…" Lou Ann crossed her legs beneath her, "Boys can be real jerks." Both girls took the opportunity to glance towards Amber; it was a moment for her to break into the conversation, though when she made no comment, they went back to their own chatter.
"He looked nice, though," Tammy offered encouragingly, "He knows I love it when he wears that shirt, so maybe that's why he did."
"Probably," Lou Ann nodded again, combing her fingers through her dark hair, "What do you think, Amber?" Their eyes moved to the blonde girl again, who sat idly on her vanity stool, her blue eyes focused on anything but the two girls in front of her.
"Hm?" She asked, her cheeks suddenly dark at the idea of being caught so off-guard by the girls, who sat staring at her with blank expressions, "Oh, yeah, that shirt. Yeah, you're probably right, Lou Ann. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you, Tammy."
She was suddenly thankful that she'd mastered the art of half-listening in school, and the girls seemed satisfied with her answer.
While the girls continued on with their conversations upstairs in Amber's room, Shelley stood outside the front door, practically fuming. Narrowing her eyes at the idea of having to wait any longer for Amber or someone to appear, she cursed under her breath, and then knocked once again on the door, though ten times more fiercely than before. If she didn't come to the door this time, she could just forget her whole purpose for coming here.
This time, the rap on the door interrupted the conversation in the bedroom, and all three girls grew quiet. Amber bit on her lip, waving her hand dismissively as she pushed herself to her feet and walked through the bedroom.
"It's just the door, I'll get it," she disappeared into the hall, "I'll be right back."
Her feet carried her down the steps and into the living room. She rested her hand on the doorknob for a moment before pulling it open, her breath catching in her throat at the sight of the girl on the porch. Her first instinct was to pull her into a hug, though she knew with Shelley, that was never an appropriate action. Instead, she crossed her arms over her chest, swallowed hard, and tried to slow the sudden increase of her heart rate. She forced a dark smirk upon her features, raising her eyebrows slightly
"What do you want, Shelley? Corny's not here, if he's what you're looking for."
Shelley sneered and pushed her way past Amber. She walked inside and carelessly tossed a bouquet of six red roses on her kitchen counter top, as well as a very plain-looking card, that had basically just been plucked off the shelf at random and signed.
"Funny," She muttered, clearly not amused by her alleged 'joke.' "I came here to see you, actually, but since you're obviously in such a bitchy mood, I guess I made a huge mistake."
Amber stepped back as Shelley pushed past her, her eyes following the card and roses as Shelley tossed them on the counter.
"You came here to see me?" She couldn't help but be a little surprised. She narrowed her eyes a little, walking silently over to the card and picking it up. She slid her finger under the envelope, tore it open carefully, and let her eyes read the card before placing it back on the counter. She studied the roses for a moment, then turned, gazing at Shelley. She stood unsurely for a moment, then moved slowly towards the other girl, her heart pounding in her chest. She allowed her arms to move slowly around her, offering her a stiff hug before pulling away. "Thank you."
As Amber read the card, Shelley took to either watching her, or glancing around the living area absentmindedly. She wasn't typically one for straightforward affections; so, as the blonde came over and slipped her arms awkwardly around her, she merely stood there, waiting until the hug was over with.
"Sure," She commented dismissively, while her hands rested in front of her waist. After silently debating with herself about what to say next, she stared at Amber, as though she were considering what the response could possibly be before she even bothered to ask. "So, what are you doing?"
"Uh, nothing," Amber replied quickly, before remembering the girls upstairs, "Oh, Tammy and Lou Ann are here. They're talking about…" she thought for a moment, before looking at Shelley, "God, I don't even know what they're talking about." She smiled a little, still watching Shelley's face, and hoping that the redhead couldn't see the blush that was rising in her cheeks. "Uh, what about you?" She swallowed hard, looking away from her for a moment in an attempt to calm her pounding heart, "What have you been up to the last few days?"
Shelley managed to keep an unfazed expression as Amber mentioned that Tammy and Lou Ann were upstairs. However, on the inside, jealousy stung viciously at the walls of her stomach. Turning her gaze, she shrugged her shoulders, hardly bothering to take any notice to Amber as she stared off at nothing in particular.
"Nothing of interest or great importance," She crossed her arms over her chest. Shelley wanted to just send her away, for whatever complex reason, but, for some reason, her mouth just wouldn't open again to get the words out.
If it had been anyone else, Amber would have teased them about the flowers, and the card. She would have prodded until she got a better apology, but with Shelley, everything was different. The fact that she had taken the time to actually get anything for her, much less wait on the front porch until Amber opened the door, spoke volumes. She smiled slightly, turning her body a little, unconsciously allowing her body to move into a flirtatious stance, her arms hanging at her side.
"I'm sure that's not exactly true." She curled her fingers into loose fists to keep herself from reaching out to touch the other girl, "You're always up to something, Shelley." Her voice was low and flirtatious, and she realized it too late. She cleared her throat a little, then looked away. "So, uh…" her mind raced with questions, all of which had to do with Link, Corny, or school, and none of them which she really wanted to know the answer to, "Do you want to come upstairs for a little while? Say hi to the girls?"
Hearing that all too recognizable, flirtatious undertone to Amber's voice, Shelley couldn't help but let her eyes wander over to her. The way that she presented herself now was painfully enticing, but Shelley convinced herself that she had a stronger willpower than that. Swallowing her nerves away, she curled and uncurled her fingers.
"I don't care," She spoke confidently and indifferently, and let her shoulders fall again, as she began the agonizingly familiar path towards Amber's room.
Amber nodded slightly, turning towards the steps and beginning to climb them. Her hand traced over the railing slightly, and when they reached the hallway leading to her bedroom, she paused, turning back to Shelley so quickly that they nearly collided.
"Let me get the vase first," she requested gently, suddenly unable to make eye contact with her, "So they don't… you know, ask questions about where the flowers came from." She laughed a little, nervously, "I'd hate to have to explain that one." She swallowed hard, taking another step towards her bedroom, still watching Shelley, "So just… stay here for a minute, okay?"
Shelley's heart twisted as she heard Amber talk about explaining where the flowers came from. Though her face didn't betray her, she was still worried that her inner emotional slip-up went noticed. Biting her tongue, she kept her usual scowl on her face as she watched Amber slip into her room.
When Amber disappeared into the bedroom, her feet carried her hurriedly through the bedroom, past the ongoing chatter between Tammy and Lou Ann.
"Amber, what are you doing?" Tammy wondered curiously from her spot on the bed, watching the blonde, "Whatcha looking for?"
"Uh," she hesitated for a moment, throwing her closet doors open and beginning to rummage through a box at the bottom of the closet, "A vase."
"Ooh," Lou Ann squealed softly, perking up suddenly, "Did some cute boy bring you flowers, Amber?" Tammy cooed suddenly as well, pushing herself off her stomach and tucking her legs beneath her.
"No!" Amber shot back suddenly, her fingers brushing over the glass vase immediately, curling her fingers around it before she turned back to them. "Nobody brought me flowers. They were… it was a delivery for my mother, okay?" She kept her voice low, watching her friends.
"Mhm," Tammy smiled knowingly, nodding, "Then, who were you downstairs talking to?"
Amber took a breath, then shook her head.
"Oh, that. No, that's no one. Well, I mean, Shelley's here, but she's-"
"Shelley?" Lou Ann cut Amber off mid-sentence, "What's that tramp doing here?"
Tammy laughed suddenly, her eyes widening at Lou Ann's words before she looked to the blonde, whose cheeks had already flushed dark pink.
"Yeah, Amber, what's she doing here?" She glanced toward the open door, her eyes scanning what she could see of the hallway, "Doesn't she know there are no boys here? No one here to spread her legs for," she laughed lightly, as if she realized how cruel her words must have sounded.
"Ooh," Lou Ann looked toward Tammy suddenly, "Who would want her anyway? I mean, she's cheaper than Brenda, just a little smarter, apparently."
Amber bit on her lip, her fingers curling tighter around the vase.
"I don't think-" Amber began quietly, desperately praying that Shelley had suddenly gone deaf and wouldn't be able to hear any of this conversation, "She just came by to drop something off."
The other girls snickered loudly, and Amber felt the blush rising in her cheeks.
"Well, tell her we don't want what she's offering," Lou Ann remarked smartly, glaring at both of the girls, "God, Amber, she's so disgusting. Really, tell her to go home."
"Well, she's not-" Amber started to speak again, but Tammy's low voice cut her off.
"Amber," she chided her gently, and their eyes met, "Shelley is everything that people say about her. We all know that." She pursed her lips a little, her eyes growing wide, "She's a…" Tammy hesitated, her voice lowering slightly, "Well, she's a bitch, Amber."
"Yeah, a bitch," Lou Ann confirmed, louder this time, "You should know that, Amber. She's basically the only one standing between you and what you want." She scoffed a little, "Yeah, except for that fat girl."
Tammy giggled a little before turning her attention back to Amber, who stood still, holding the vase.
"But really, Amber, don't invite her up here. She's such a drag." She thought for a moment, "Just lie to her. Tell her we're getting ready to go home, anyway, and that we won't be here that much longer." She shrugged nonchalantly, "She doesn't need to know we're spending the night."
Lou Ann nodded in agreement.
"She also doesn't need to know that we all hate her," she laughed a little, "Not that it's anything new. She acts like you want her to be here or something," she sneered, "Obviously that's not the case." She was quiet for a moment, "I mean, you don't want her to be here, do you?"
Amber stood still for a moment, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. It took her a moment to find her voice, and she shook her head, her blue eyes narrowing into hateful slits.
"Well, no. I mean, of course I don't want her to be here. I wouldn't even have opened the door if I'd known it was her," she lied blatantly, already feeling the knots in her stomach, "I'll just tell her to get the hell away." She nodded once, and the girls squealed victoriously as Amber darted out of the room, "I'll be right back."
Contrary to what Amber wanted to believe, Shelley had heard every hateful, damnable word from those girls and even from Amber herself. However, she was set on not letting any of it bother her; that is, until she heard Amber's words. What a lying, wannabe, back-stabbing, little whore of a bitch. Shelley's lips peeled back in a snarl, and she was gone before Amber even thought about coming out of her room.
She snatched a single cigarette from her pocket, grabbed a lighter from her purse, and then swiftly lit it and placed it between her rosy lips as she made a v-line for the door. Shelley was obviously not wanted here; therefore, she sure as hell didn't want to be here. The redhead had always felt a certain pang of jealousy and even hatred for Lou Ann and Tammy, and this little visit had only furthered her point. Even still, what hurt the most was that Amber had agreed with them. For someone as hardhearted as Shelley, it was foreign to her that she had actually felt angry, hurt tears being to form in the depths of her eyes. In spite of this, she had kept them at bay, if only because she wasn't about to give Amber, or those girls the satisfaction of seriously hurting her.
Before Amber even hit the hallway, she knew Shelley would be gone. She could chalk it up to years of knowing the other girl, or the redhead's pride, but deep inside she knew that no sane person would stand there and allow themselves to be insulted by a group of their peers, especially by the one person that should never have taken part in it.
Without thinking, she raced down the steps, still clutching the vase in her hands. She pushed through the front door, racing down the porch steps and onto the sidewalk, calling the other girl's name as she spotted her on the street.
"Shelley!" She rushed across the street, narrowly avoiding the oncoming traffic. "Shelley, wait up!"
Shelley turned around sharply and glared ferociously at Amber, the cigarette still tucked between her lips. Catching it between her index and middle fingers, she blew a puff of smoke past her lips, and scoffed.
"What the fuck do you want, Amber?" She narrowed her eyes. "Oh, right, I know: to tell me 'to get the hell away.'" Shelley kept the vicious scowl on her face. "Well, it's unnecessary, because I was just leaving, anyway."
Amber sucked her breath in, waving her hand ferociously in front of her face to clear the smoke.
"No, I didn't-" She swallowed hard, then reached for the cigarette between Shelley's fingers, barely avoiding being burned in the process before she dropped it to the pavement, crushing it beneath her shoe, much to Shelley's annoyance. "I don't know why you picked up that nasty habit, Shelley. You're going to kill yourself. And you know I didn't mean that! God, you've always prided yourself on being a heartless bitch and now you're crying over what Tammy and Lou Ann said?" She narrowed her eyes, watching her as the wind blew past them, ruffling their skirts. She brushed the hair behind her ears, still glaring at Shelley.
Shelley practically hissed at her.
"Do I look like I'm crying to you?" She wrinkled her nose angrily and snatched another cigarette from her pocket; although, this time, she waited to light it, since she knew that Amber would probably just end up spoiling this one, as well. "I'm just pissed that I took time out of my day just to come here and listen to bullshit like this, at your house, of all places."
"No, you're not crying, Shelley, you're feeling sorry for yourself which is even worse in your case. You act like some damn saint, when you lie to my face all the damn time, Shelley! You go out of your way to fuck with me. You're telling me this shit that happened between you and Corny wasn't supposed to hurt me?"
Shelley paused, her face holding the outraged expression fervently.
"After this, I really don't know if I care that it hurt you," She lowered her voice, even though she was almost completely certain that they were alone. "Amber, I'm sick of actually trying with you, when you just prove to me over and over again that I'm so much better than all of this," Shelley glowered at her. "You're such a two-faced little slut, that I'm just so close to giving up with you. I'm sick of going on some rollercoaster ride of emotions with you; it just fucks everything up even more, and it's all your damn fault."
Though it was more out of irony than anything else, Amber laughed loudly, watching her still.
"You have got to be fucking kidding me, Shelley! You are trying with me?" She sneered at her, snatching the unlit cigarette from Shelley's hand, throwing it behind them into a bush on the sidewalk, "Stop with the fucking cigarettes, would you? Are you asking to die? That's so disgusting. I would never kiss anyone who smokes, it's going to rot your teeth out." She grasped Shelley's wrist, "I don't get what makes you so much fucking better than me. I really don't. You're allowed to do whatever the hell you want to me, and the second I say anything about you, something that's not even true, you take off running like a scalded dog with your tail between your legs. Don't you think that's a little hypocritical, Shelley?"
Shelley's eyes didn't let up with any of the intensity in them. All the same, there was a glint of offense within their intricate depths. She pursed her lips, and then sighed in frustration. This was one of those rare moments where she had no idea what the hell to say. Amber was pulling every single insult from the book and throwing it right back at Shelley, and she didn't know what to do. Luckily, though, it was just the two of them, so she didn't have to worry about showing any sort of weakness in front of anyone, save Amber.
As she stared at Amber, her eyebrows furrowed, she wanted so badly just to let everything go, but she just couldn't. Shelley did not cry; it wasn't something that she did, wanted to do, or even encouraged of herself or others. She knew it was entirely spinelessly and weak, and those were the last two things she ever wanted to be. Regardless of all of that, and despite the fierceness that she was showing before Amber right now, there was almost a diffident sort of pain that shone through her, something that only Amber would be able to detect. Still, she recklessly shoved that aside, and took to worsening her scowl, virtually growling at Amber, as she turned her face from her.
"Whatever," She decided finally. "I just really do not care anymore, Amber. I don't."
"You can't make me believe that for a second," she breathed the words, her lips mere centimeters from Shelley's, "You make me so angry, Shelley." Her breath was shallow now, and her eyes were dark as she studied Shelley's profile. "And there is nothing in this world that I would like more right now than to-" she paused. What was it exactly that she wanted at this moment? Even after everything, she wasn't interested in hurting her again; she didn't want to see that pain in those pale eyes. After taking a moment to glare at her, she raised her hands, grasping Shelley's face tightly, turning it towards her as she met her lips in a fierce kiss, her mouth ravaging the redhead's, sighing slightly as she pressed her lips hard against the other girl's. This. This was exactly what they both needed.
Shelley kept herself from squealing in shock or surprise as Amber grabbed her face. Though, even as angry as she still was, she melted very quickly into the kiss. Reluctant to let her hands move from her sides, she deepened the kiss, her fingers just barely brushing against the fabric of Amber's dress, near her hips. She moved her teeth tactfully against Amber's bottom lip, and then suddenly and even desperately grasped at the front of the blonde's dress as she drew her towards her. The kiss continued on hungrily, and she sighed softly as she lightly pressed against her. She had missed Amber's touch so much, that her body was very literally aching as she craved for more from her.
Amber let herself sigh against Shelley's lips, and even moaned softly as she felt her hands pulling at her dress. As angry as she was; as much as she wished she could erase this fight between them, it felt so good to be in her arms again. It was addictive, and she couldn't believe how amazing Shelley's lips tasted; better than Corny's, better than anyone she'd ever kissed. Shelley had, somehow unconsciously, already managed to stake her claim in Amber's mind, and heart.
With great reluctance, Amber forced herself to pull away from the kiss after a few moments. She sighed heavily, keeping her eyes locked on Shelley's face, and a smirk pulled across her lips.
"I like when our fights end like this," she swiped a thumb near Shelley's lip, erasing her lipstick smudges, "And right now, I don't even care if you think you hate me, because I know you don't."
Shelley hesitated for a moment after the kiss, still wonderfully dazed from it. Smirking, she ran her own thumb against the skin near Amber's lips to wipe the lipstick from it. It was a slightly humorous activity that seemed to follow a good bit of their secret meetings.
"I don't," She purred, staying close to Amber. Shelley longed to kiss her again so badly, but she knew that it probably wasn't a good idea, because then they would never be able to leave one another. "I could never," She said quietly, her own voice hinting how surprised she was to have let that slip. Feeling her cheeks burn in the most uncharacteristic of ways, she regained her composure by moving away from Amber and standing back to look at her collectedly.
"They'll be suspicious," She said vacantly, her expression inwardly reflecting how pissed, torn, and frustrated she was as she practically demanded that Amber go back to her deceitful guests.
"Let them wonder where we went," she whispered softly into the other girl's ear, "They'll just think we're scratching the shit out of each other in the middle of the street." Her breath was warm against Shelley's ear, "Only we have to know what really goes on between us."
Of course, bedroom windows, especially those that face the street, can be one's greatest enemy. As Amber and Shelley huddled there on the sidewalk, their fingers entwined, their heart rates quick simply by being so intimately close to each other after so long, they had no reason to suspect that Amber's guests had seen the entire display of affection.
They had no reason to suspect that, in that rare moment of happiness between them, they had created bigger problems together than either of them could have ever caused alone.