Childbirth Recollections

Chapter 3: Anders

Merric of Hollyrose looked around at those assembled. They all looked so gloomy. Why? He wondered. Kel needed this. She needed someone to love and look after while the man of the house was out. Kel would do just fine as a mother. And with two of the best knight-healers in Tortall in there to look after her, Kel would be just fine.

"It'll be good for Kel to have her hands full." He said aloud. People turned to look at him. Merric went on to explain his point. "She needs something to take her mind off Sir Anders. She's been really quiet ever since, well, you know. Do you all remember? Anders went off to help Lord Meren with his spindren problem…"

It was exactly four years and seven months before, on an overcast day. The Immortals were settling into Tortall and the other lands surrounding there Emerald Ocean. Some, like the kudarung, were peaceful by nature, and had quickly captured the hearts of many. Others, like the centaurs, had formed peace treaties with humans, swearing to abide by the human laws. But many, spindrens, Stormwings and hurroks included, hated humans, and acted upon their vicious natures, attacking and killing many. Hundreds of people, not all of them Tortallan, had died defending their lands and loved ones from the ferocious immortals.

Lord Meren had sent out an urgent plea for help when spindrens had attacked one of his villages. Sir Anders of Mindelan had been less that a day's ride from Lord Meren's lands, with a squad of Mindelan's men at arms. He and his squad had answered the call.

In the fight that followed, only two were killed. One was a villager, killed when a dying spindren fell on him. By the time the carcass was moved, the man had suffocated. The other was Anders.

This would have broken the heart of many, but Kel's was shattered with guilt and sorrow. Earlier that day, Anders had asked her if she wanted to go riding a patrol with him and his squad. Kel had declined, as she wanted to practice her skill with a sword. As she had been fighting with her glaive for all her years as a squire, and then almost four years as a knight, her skill with a sword was sadly lacking.

The very second that Kel heard that Lord Meren had sent a plea or help and that Anders had answered it, she was worried. With only a squad of men at arms to help him, Anders would be having a hard time. He had never fully recovered from his injuries sustained in the Immortals War.

Kel gathered as many men at arms as Mindelan could spare, and rode to Green Valley, Lord Meren's fief. When she got there, the Mindelan men at arms worked with the men at arms of Green Valley to finish off the spindrens. Kel herself looked for Anders. She couldn't see him anywhere. No, wait. Was that him?

Anders was lying in the dust, blood pooling around him, dirt caking his wounds. As Kel rushed to his side, she saw horrific wounds.

Anders was dying fast, and all Kel could do was hold him, waiting for the Black God to come for him.

As she cradled his head in her lap, he made several gurgling noises.

"Shhh. Don't speak," she soothed.

"Kel." Anders' voice was a dry rasp. "Tell Mama … I'm sorry – I didn't make it … home. Look after – my – children. Kel …" and, with a sigh, Anders' soul joined the Black God in the Peaceful Realms.

Kel sat there, crying, with only her guilt to comfort her as the world moved on around her.

"Anders, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she sobbed, guilt clawing at her stomach.

It was dark before anyone thought to look for her.

"Kel! Kel? Kel, where are you?" The words seemed to come from far away. The words forced their way through her numb ears and into her sluggish brain. "Kel? Mithros, Kel, is that you? What happened?" She knew that voice … "Kel, are you alright? I'm so sorry." …where had she heard it before? …

A glowing green hand was placed on her shoulder. Slowly, her brain began to work. It was raining, but she had no idea when it had started. Slowly she began to take in her surroundings. She was in a small clearing away from where the main battle had taken place. Bodies, both human and immortal littered the ground. Beside her was a pair of feet. She tried to draw breath to speak, but felt hands close her eyes. She tried to protest, but she was just so sleepy. Green light played across the insides of her eyelids. And then Kel blacked out.

"I remember that." Owen of Jesslaw put in. "Kel almost died of hypothermia that day. She was strong enough to fight it, but it was as if she'd lost the will to live. Her brother dying in her arms, her mother unable to leave her bed, Cleon to marry to that heiress in a month's time, Sergent Domitan being held hostage by that Scanran war lord who broke the peace treaty, her father in the Yamani Islands. It'd've got to anyone. But it hit Kel worst of all…"

It had taken Kel three weeks to recover enough from the hypothermia to be taken back to Mindelan. During that time, Kel also fell victim to pneumonia, so she almost drowned. Neal hadn't left her side for more than three minutes at a time, fearing that in those three minutes, Kel would take a turn for the worse, and he wouldn't be there to reverse the effects, and she would be severely damaged, if she survived at all. Thankfully, this only happened once, and Neal returned in time to stop any serious damage.

Kel was unconscious for most of the time she was ill.

Anders' funeral was put off until Kel was well enough to attend. She was rushed back to bed as soon as the service to Mithros and the Black God was over. A week after that, with many healers, including Alanna's, help, Kel was able to get up and go for a walk. Soon afterwards Kel was fully healed, but she seemed to still carry a dark sense of guilt wherever she went. She wore her 'Yamani Lump' face a lot, and it was a long time before she was able to act naturally around Anders' children. By then, Kel was back in the field.

"Keladry still carries the sorrow and guilt. She seems to feel that if she'd gone with Anders, he wouldn't have been killed. Perhaps a child of her own will take her mind off it. It's been a long time. She needs to let go, for her sake, and for the child's." Lord Wyldon of Cavall commented. "She needs to for the sake of her mental health, and can you imagine the havoc it would wreak in a child's mind, to grow up in the shadow of poor, dead Uncle Anders? If it's a boy, everyone must strongly advise her against calling him Anders. Even you, Illane."

"I agree with Wyldon." Duke Baird said. "For the sake of both Kel and her child, we mustn't let the child be raised like that. It would be bad for the mental health of all involved."

"It really got to Kel that she couldn't go to Cleon's wedding. Meathead wouldn't let her. She would have collapsed in the middle of the ceremony. Can you imagine what the talk would have been if the Lady Knight Keladry of Mindelan did something as feminine as a swoon?" Dom grinned evilly.

"Kel wouldn't have cared." Yuki said in her barely accented Common. "The conservatives have been hassling her for years, and she hasn't twitched an eyelash at them. She very good in that way. She doesn't care, as long as she does her best by the people under her care."

"She'll get a lot from them now that she's got a child." Dom commented. "No one who isn't at this party knows. She's been wearing that charm Neal made her."

"What charm? I didn't know she was wearing a charm!" King Jonathan interrupted. Thayet put a soothing hand on his arm.

"It's a charm that hides the effects of pregnancy. Keladry didn't want the conservatives to give her a harm time, so when she was out in public, she wore the charm." Thayet explained.

"Baird, did you check it over? I'd hate for something to have gone wrong and a rouge charm to damage the baby." Jonathan was worried. He'd become quite fond of the realm's famed Lady Knight over the last eight years.

"Baird checked it, Alanna checked it, Numair checked it, the palace healers checked it, and I checked it, all before Keladry had any idea that it was even in existence. She'd asked Neal if he knew if there were such things, and he told her he'd look into it. Not only did that charm hide the effects of pregnancy, it helped with morning sickness, kept the mother and child in good health, and made it easy for the healers to find Keladry." It was Eleni Cooper, Sir Myles's wife, who answered the King. She was a healer and former priestess. "But she's not wearing it today. I hope everything is alright."