Busy is now my middle name. I had to apply to 6 colleges (even though I originally planned to apply to 12 lol) also I've gotten sicker and working 30 hours a week after school does not help matters at all. plus it seems a dear friend of mine is developing a crush on me and well…its akward at best. But it seems this show will never end with so many questions needing to be answered. None the less I present another chapter!

Zell-Chan: Hey everybody! I missed you all . Welcome back to another round of Ask a host! Last episode is a bit of a haze but I heard it was very entertaining….though it seems a lot of forest animals have been hanging out around my house lately….(shakes her head dismissively) oh well lets go on to the next questioner. Dontgiveadamn writes:

Kyouya:

-In a hypothetical situation, if you and Tamaki were a couple what do you think you're family would say and/or do?
-Name one of the things you are scared of.

Haruhi:

-If you were given a choice to marry either Kyouya or Tamaki, who would it be?

Hunni:

-Does it bother you that you are short for a 17 year old?

-Does becoming the Haninozuka heir scare you in anyway?

Twins:

-Why do you refer to Haruhi as your 'toy' instead of friend?

-If one of you fell in love with another person what would the other do?

ohhh good question. So lets start with Kyoya.

"I'm not answering any stupid questions referring to the sexuality of myself or Tamaki be it hypothetical or not." Kyoya deadpans.

Zell-Chan: Oh come on Kyoya it's just a question and the contract you signed with the studio says that you would answer all questions asked as long as they did not refer to your family's company secrets. (hands Kyoya a copy of the contract and a magnifying glass)

"I don't see anything….dammit." Kyoya sighs in defeat.

(Zell-Chan does a victory dance for all her yaoi fangirl subjects)

"Hypothetically speaking I suppose if I and Tamaki were a couple my family would disown me and I would have to support myself financially."

Zell-Chan: Aww I guess in a way "hypothetically speaking" you'd have to rely on Tamaki….maybe even live with him…and sleep in his room.

"Oh my god they would use the same shower!"

"EEEK!"

Fangirls go crazy with yaoi thoughts all over the audience and soon have to be hosed down by security.

"Must you be so crude?" Kyoya asks glaring at the hostess who is giggling at the audience who is soaking wet with content smiles on their faces.

Zell-Chan: I did it for you mister, look at them their like wet cats! (laughs maniacally) so answer the second question…what are you afraid of? (evil grin)

"Some part of me says I should be afraid of fangirlqueens but in truth I fear nothing."

Zell-Chan: I think you really should pay attention to that small part of you. (eyes widen in shock as she finds herself immune to the cold glare Kyoya gives her) interesting…now lets move on. Haruhi if you were given a choice to marry Kyoya or Tamaki who would it be?

"If I was given a choice to marry either of them I would choose neither. If I ever get married it would be because of mutual love not because I chose to marry that person." Haruhi deadpans leaving Tamaki split between despair and blushing.

Zell-Chan: Blunt and to the point…didn't expect any less from you my friend. Now for Hunny to answer the next questions. Does it bother you that your short for a 17 year old? and does becoming the Haninozuka heir frighten you in anyway?

Hunny looks up and thinks cutely.

" A lot of males in the Haninozuka family are short so it doesn't bother me. Anyway I'm 18 so I've still got a lot of growing to do!"

Zell-Chan: We all know your going to grow some more. You'll be all tall and cute and strong…and (starts drooling)

"Um..why is Zell-Chan drooling like that?" Haruhi asks.

"Probably imagining Hunny-Sempai all grown up." Hikaru snickers.

"Maybe he should answer the second question before she gets dehydrated…" Kaoru whispers as he starts taking pictures of the comatose Hostess.

"Why would I be afraid of being what I was born to be? I love my family's dojo and hope to make my father proud when I run it." Hunny smiles causing flowers to bloom around him.

"You will Mitsukuni." Mori says affectionately as he pats Hunny on the head.

"EEEK!" A fangirl screams right into the hostess's ear .

Zell-Chan: got to shower after getting all sweaty from training…(giggles only to pop out of her trance and wipe the large amount of drool from her mouth.) Oh sorry about that just daydreaming a bit….well lets move on! For the twins why do you refer to Haruhi as your "toy" instead of friend?

"As much as play with our dear Haruhi…" Hikaru croons as he lifts Haruhi's chin up from one side.

"…there should be no question why Haruhi is our toy…our special toy." Kaoru whispers from Haruhi's other side as he wraps his arms around her waist..

Zell-Chan: ahuh…-- so if one of you fell in love with another person what would the other do? (rolls her eyes and sits down waiting for the lights to dim and two spotlights dawn on Hikaru and Kaoru)

"I would never leave Kaoru and he would never leave me!" Hikaru screams.

Kaoru merely looks away with a blush on his face.

"…right?" Hikaru's voice falters as he takes a step towards Kaoru.

"I would never leave you…it's just that hearing those words from your mouth …just makes me so happy." Kaoru cries as he buries himself in Hikaru's arms.

"I'm only here to make you happy Kaoru…even if that meant bringing someone else to our bed…maybe even Haruhi…" Hikaru grins.

"Oh no, you two are not pulling me into this!" Haruhi waves as she grabs her things and leaves the studio.

"Oh come on Haruhi there's enough room for all three of us if were on top of each other!" Kaoru teases as him and Hikaru run after Haruhi.

…..the audience is silent as a cold wind blows and the hostess turns around only to find ever single audience member (except for Renege) dead from loss of blood.

Zell-Chan: Oh my god! They did it! They beta their record for most nose bleeds and deaths! Let's show their scores!

BROTHERLY LOVE SCENES: 16

NOSEBLEEDS: 920

DEATHS: 900

(The show producers and camera men applaud as balloons and confetti drop from the ceiling)

Zell-Chan: Congratulations you two for making a world record! How do you feel?!

Hikaru and Kaoru stop their torture of Haruhi as a spotlight shines on them.

"Ok I guess." The twins deadpan at the same time as two girls dressed as bunnys (much to Hunny and Mori's delight) escort Hikaru and Kaoru back to the center stage and give them both a kiss on the cheek.

Zell-Chan: Now that you are mass murderers what do you plan to do?

"Murderers?" Hikaru gulps.

"We didn't kill anyone?" Kaoru whimpers.

(Police burst down the doors and circle the stage)

Zell-Chan: Not according to Japanese law.

"You can't possibly arrest them because of their killer looks…can you?" Tamaki asks nervously.

Zell-Chan: I personally don't think they could handle jail but I didn't make the law.( pouts)

" Put your hands in the air and get on your knees!" A police officer barks.

"Hold me Kaoru" Hikaru whimpers in fear as him and his brother latch onto each other.

"Stop this at once!" An authoritive voice beckons as a shadowy figure enters the studio.

Zell-Chan: (in shock and awe) No way…it can't be!

"Glad you could make it….the situation was getting a tad out of hand." Kyoya smirks as he closes his cell phone.

Zell-Chan: H-h-hakkai…G-g-goyjo!?

"Now what's all this? I didin't think you would ever stand by and let bishonen get hurt." Goyjo pouts.

Zell-Chan: (infuriated and blushing) How do you know them!

"Were bishonen…we stick together." Kyoya says as him and his fellow host seem to simultaneously pose causing sparkles to blind the police.

"I think you have the power to stop these boys from being sent to jail…if not for them then do it for us." Hakkai pleads as he stands next to the startstruck hostess.

"I promise we'll make it up to you." Goyjo whispers in the hostess's ear.

The hostess melts into a puddle of goo only to quickly reform with guns and ammo.

"No one gets arrested in my studio!" Zell screams shooting around the studio.

"She's freaking tweaked!" A rookie officer yells as he hides behind a chair.

"Retreat! Retreat!" The police captain shouts as the police quickly dodge bullets and exit the studio.

When the dust cleared Zell-Chan stands sweaty and panting.

"Well our job is done." Goyjo smirks as he lights a cigarette and prepares to leave.

"See you at the next Bishonen meeting Oootori-San" Hakkai waves.

Zell-Chan: Wait! My precious bishonen come back!

Goyjo and Hakkai turn and share a look as they come back to either side of Zell-Chan and give her a chaste kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks Hun." Goyjo smiles as the hostess goes unconscious from loss of blood.

"I think everyone has learned a valuable lesson today." Hakkai says to the camera.

"As bishonen we shouldn't abuse our powers of persuasion because it can have dire consequences?" Hikaru and Kaoru ask.

"That looks can kill?" Tamaki asks.

"That if you have the right contacts you can avoid being arrested?" Goyjo asks

"No silly…" Hakkai begins only to be interrupted by Kyoya.

"That as long as we are handsome we can control women and even life and death." Kyoya says with a glare that rivals that of even Hakkai.

"I have to agree." Hakkai smirks.

All the host, Hakkai, and Goyjo come together and turn facing the camera.

"This PSA was brought to you by bishonen flakes…please sparkle responsibly. See you next time on…

ASK A HOST!

As the credits roll everyone talks to each other as "The more you know" music plays.

(A/N: I'm so, so , sorry I just couldent help the PSA message at the end…did I mention im sick? also Goyjo and Hakkai are from saiyuki google them their sexy.) zell-chan