If we own Naruto… The keyword being "if".

This fic is:

1. SasuNaru, yaoi, OOC and unbeta-read.

2. co-written by XKunoichiofthePaintbrushX so let her know you appreciate her efforts.

3. Anonymous reviewers: Please leave your email add. Promise, we won't bite. See? Even Kunoichi hid her fangs.

The dark-haired man slammed the other man against the wall while holding the lapels of his jacket so tight his victim was gasping for breath.

"You're talking nonsense again," the Uchiha hissed his voice as cold as an ice. "I told you I'm not letting you go no matter what my parents say." He let go of the blonde who took huge gulps of air.

"Were you trying to kill me, you asshole!?"

"I see no point of killing someone who doesn't understand his situation," the pale man snapped. He reached out for his lover who slapped his hand away.

"I'm afraid I understand our situation more than you do! I understand it so much that I think 'us' is impossible."

Hot anger seared through his veins at those words. He was angry because his lover had the gall to say which he believed to be truth. "So you're going to throw away what we had worked for? Is that what you're trying to say? Why don't you just bid me goodbye!"

"It's not that!" he shouted back. Shouting was so easy to drown out the pain dripping from his love's voice. "I will never say goodbye! Not until you want me to but I'm scared you'd be ripped away from me when I'm not ready. I am so fucking scared that I-" he was silenced with a gentle kiss.

"You don't have to get ready. I won't let myself be torn away from you," the Uchiha murmured against his lips, his breath gently fanning tanned face.

"That's a lie," the blonde whispered. He knew it was a lie and he knew that his lover knew. Their world had started crumbling and the 'us' had started eroding one chip after another. He leaned into the hard chest and inhaled the scent he loved so much except that the scent was no longer calming. If anything, it just stirred the fears he had since their parents' discovery of their relationship.

The Uchiha held the shorter man. "I know but you're worth living a lie... worth for the consequences of living a lie. I still have the strength to fight this already futile battle."

"Me too. I want to continue fighting even if I'd be called a fool. I wanted to be with you until this world shatters." Having said that, he clung to him. He clung desperately not wanting to let go and never thinking of letting go.

I want to continue fighting because I love you more than anybody else.

Chapter 13: The mask of betrayal, confusion wears

Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear
Sealed with lies through so many tears
Lost from within, pursuing the end
-"Lies", Evanescence

Sasuke shook his head almost in denial. There was no way a tongue, a mouth and fingers could give him this much pleasure. There was no way his body could respond this hungrily to soft caresses and yet... He moaned as heat engulfed his length too familiarly. He bucked against that mouth and he knew he was close to completion when those fingers massage his inner thighs.

Oh god! Just few more sucks... few more thrusts and...

Sasuke woke up and found himself on his study desk. He had fallen asleep while studying. Worse, he had another wet dream! He glanced down at his groin and scowled. What did he do to deserve this? And who was his partner? Her face was vague but basing on the slight curves of that body, she was a girl. Was he in love with some girl without him knowing?

Unable to answer the nagging question, he went to his bed and slept, successfully forcing himself to ignore his erection.

-SasuNaru is love-

Naruto stood on the rooftop, leaned against the wall patiently waiting for the girl in front of him to start confessing her love. He tilted his head and stared at the clouds forming different shapes as they drifted along the sky. He shifted his gaze when the girl opened her mouth to say what the blonde knew was coming- a love confession.

"I love Sasuke-kun the moment I set my eyes on him," she said bashfully. Talking to Naruto was like talking to her crush considering how close the two were. "So please give this to him." She bowed while holding out her letter.

A love confession for his friend. Not that he was expecting it for him. Contrary to what Sasuke was thinking, his admirers were intelligent or to be exact resourceful. Knowing that Sasuke listening to their confession was close to impossible, they decided to send him letters through his childhood friends because the probability of him reading it wasn't null, small but nevertheless there. Those who approached Gaara received sharp glares so in the end, all fangirls ran to Naruto.

Being someone who pitied those love-scorned, Naruto made sure that Sasuke read just few of them. Surprisingly, the Uchiha would humor him and read or scanned five or six letters but for a different reason. He searched for grammar and kanji mistakes and made fun of them then decided with himself to never read their letters again.

Naruto knew this was as far as Sasuke would go and asking him to write replies was too much.

"Here comes the postman," Kiba announced when Naruto entered the room carrying two small-sized paper bags.

The blonde just stuck his tongue before dropping one bag on Gaara's table. "It's a gift for the upcoming district tournament from Hino-san."

Gaara nodded and placed it on the floor near his bag, never bothering to open it much less showing any reaction. But this was Gaara. The same Gaara who accepted letters from his admirers but never read them. He just placed those missives in a box in his bedroom and let them gather dusts and hopefully they would decompose.

"Where's the bastard?" the blonde asked as he dropped on the bastard's throne seat.

"Off to somewhere. Probably to the council room, He'll be back shortly," Chouji answered.

"What's with the face?" Shino asked as he saw how the tanned face scrunched with an unfamiliar emotion. "Constipation?"

"Hell no!" He was just tired listening to the same confession over and over again. It had been a month since this started and he felt exhausted.

Shikamaru who had been dozing off covered his ears when Sakura and Ino scolded Naruto again for letting the other girls have the same leverage that they had. Their other friends rolled their eyes. When it came to their feelings for the Uchiha, they were on the same level as their rivals although they were part of Sasuke's group of friends. How they came to be in the group was that they were good friends with Hinata who was a close friend of Chouji.

"Get off from my chair, dobe," Sasuke said as he stood beside him, ignoring the now bickering girls.

The blonde waved a hand in the air dismissively and drawled, "I don't see your name on it."

Sasuke smirked and pulled Naruto forward. "Unfortunately," he said as he tapped the back of his chair, "there is."

True to his word, there was 'bastard's throne' written on it by no other than the blonde.

"I'm sure you're referring about me when you wrote 'bastard's', yeah?"

Of course, he was. The first time Sasuke saw it, he had taunted the already annoyed blonde. A second later, fistfight broke out and it took the rest of the gang to stop them from killing each other.

Naruto stood up but before he could move to another seat, Sasuke had none-too-gently pushed him against his desk. The blonde got the idea and sat on his friend's table. "Having fun with your postman duties?" the Uchiha sarcastically asked as he disdainfully looked at the bag full of letters.

"Is being a postman your ambition as a kid?" Chouji asked.

Sasuke casually leaned against his chair and replied for Naruto. "No, his ambition was to become hmph…" A tanned hand prevented him from finishing his statement and everybody except Gaara looked curious.

"If you have a heart to accept their letters then I wouldn't be doing this."

Sasuke didn't dignify the statement with an answer or a reaction. But deep down, he was looking forward in spending his time with the blonde even if it was just reading those disgustingly sweet letters.

-SasuNaru is love-

Eyelids fluttered open to reveal limpid pools of hazy desire. Sasuke wiped the beads of sweat on his face... sweat that resulted from kissing and being kissed; from touching and being touched and from giving and receiving pleasure. It looked so real except that his partner was still fuzzy. But he was certain that it was girl because he had entered into a tight heat. A tight heat that made him moan.

He slowly moved his legs not wanting to spread the evidence of his dream activity. He grabbed some sheets of tissue and wiped the affected areas before going to the bathroom.

-SasuNaru is love-

Saturday found a lot of students in Konoha High, students who were members of different clubs and who were there for gatherings and extra practice. Naruto was one of them.

Naruto leaned back with a smile as he finally done preparing a bento. He carefully wrapped the lunch box in a cloth. He gave his wrapped product a tap ready to take it to its intended recipient who happened to be leaning against the doorjamb looking like he owned the world.

"Shouldn't you be at the SC office working your ass off?" the blonde asked.

Sasuke straightened and walked to sit on a chair. "Not when you're about to run away with my bento."

Naruto snorted but he placed the bento in front of his friend and sat across from him. "It's too bad Gaara had to join the friendly match with another school but I decided to prepare a bento for him this Monday." He focused his gaze on the person in front of him. "How is it?"

Sasuke looked at the bento. It was well-arranged and done artistically to reflect Fall. And it looked so delicious that he was salivating. "I haven't started eating yet," he replied. "I gratefully partake."

"And?" the shorter male inquired again, his face almost close to other lad's.

Sasuke's eyelids fluttered close a bit longer than a blink as his taste buds tingled. Naruto really had a talent.

"Ne, why didn't you proceed to that prep school?"

The blonde smiled and gave the same answer every time Sasuke would ask the same question. "Secret. So how is it?"

"I'll tell you later. Let me finish first."

The blonde pouted but he didn't ask again.

Shikamaru scratched his head as he walked away from the Culinary Arts laboratory. Four hours of playing Shougi had rendered him hungry. And because the school canteen was close and going to the nearest convenient store was too troublesome, he went to what the gang dubbed as 'Naruto's kitchen'. Seeing that the door was closed, he took a peek through the small glass window of the door and found Sasuke and Naruto. The smiling blond had his face perched on the heel of his hand as he listened to Sasuke talking between bites of what Shikamaru thought to be delicious food. The Uchiha wasn't scowling nor smiling, he just had this content look on his face and the lazy lad was certain that Sasuke wasn't aware of it, making it even harder for him to interrupt. With the soft sunlight filtering through the window, the scene looked like it came straight from an anime where a girl prepared a bentou for her boyfriend who later on held bite-sized food for her with his chopsticks.

"...the council seemed messed up with the election for the next school year coming up," Sasuke said as he ended his complaints. "I better get back to my work."

The blonde just nodded. Seeing the expectant look his friend was still wearing, Sasuke sighed and combed a hand through his hair. "'You should have gone to that prep school'... I want to say that but," he paused and threw a smirk over his shoulder, "but a master painter can make do even with a broken brush." Saying that he closed the door behind him never bothering to witness how blue eyes widened and how a dazzling grin broke into Naruto's face as the compliment sunk in.

-SasuNaru is love-

With the lightness he felt, Sasuke thought that nothing could go wrong that day. Things had gone the way he wanted them to plus he had lunch with Naruto… who was now hugging some girl- a sight that made his heart drop to the pit of his stomach. No... no... he was being hugged by some girl but what was the difference anyway and why the hell should he care who Naruto hugged and who hugged him?

He wrenched his gaze from the scene and continued walking towards his destination, ignoring how his blood simmered. And when he thought that he had calmed down thirty minutes later, Sasuke met Naruto on the cobblestone path that connected two buildings.

"I'd been looking for you," the blonde said.

"A lot of people do," Sasuke replied in a clipped voice as he walked passed his friend.

"Maeda-san wants you to have this letter."

The Uchiha paused as he heard the name. Maeda... the one who had hugged the blonde.

"She even hugged me out of gratitude." The blonde was shaking his head in wry amusement.

The dark-haired man whirled around. There were lots of thoughts whirling in his mind and all of them were negative. "Look at you, Naruto. You haven't changed at all." The blonde was surprised at his friend's caustic tone. What did he do now? "You are still the same boy who craves for a female's attention to fill the void caused by your mother's absence."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I wonder how far you would go for a kiss. My secrets for a kiss from those girls." His voice turned sweet as he continued, "How sweet of you," then he spat out, "you traitor!"

The sound of flesh hitting against flesh was drowned out by the thunder rolling across the dark skies as Naruto punched Sasuke sending him sprawled on the ground.

Rain started to angrily beat the earth but none of that mattered to either of the two. The blonde straddled his friend, grabbed his collar and shouted just to be heard amidst the furious sound of rain. "Who are you calling traitor, you fucking asshole?" He then punched him. Being accused of treachery was what pissed him off the most. He betrayed no one and would betray nobody because he wasn't a scum bag.

Sasuke retaliated and bucked to throw off his most hated person at that moment. The two staggered to their feet, their body tensed and ready to attack and defend. Both of them met halfway and swung their fists at the same time.

Naruto hated the fact that Sasuke was sending him to a rollercoaster ride. One moment he was kind and approachable and the next he was calling him a traitor. What the hell was the bastard's problem? And he asked him that while blocking a right hook.

"YOU!" was the instant reply and Sasuke made sure his left punch would hit and it did. But Naruto manage to kick his abdomen at the same time.

"This is for calling me a traitor!" the blonde growled as he followed his kick with an uppercut.

"This is for letting me read those disgusting letters." Another hit from the dark-haired teen.

For few minutes the two teens were in constant motion of kick, parry, punch and counter. As seconds ticked by, their reasons of their attacks covered trivial matters and transgression they committed when they were kids.

"This is for eating one of my cookies," Naruto said.

"For hogging the blankets most of the time!" Sasuke retorted after spitting some blood.

"For occupying most of my bed!"

"For choosing me over Kyuubi!"

The two tumbled together, Naruto on top of Sasuke. He pulled his fist back and his eyes clashed against Sasuke. They were exhausted, they realized. Exhausted, injured, wet and dirty.

Naruto slumped beside his friend. Coincidentally, they closed their eyes at the same time and let the feeling of raindrops prickling their face soothe their aching bruises. An awkward silence blanketed them during that time.

A minute later, Sasuke stood up and left without looking back. It was only then did Naruto let out a shuddering breath and a controlled sob. Under the pouring rain he cried because damn it! It hurt. It fucking hurt! And the more he didn't want to cry, the faster his tears fell as if it was matching the passion the rain was showing.

-SasuNaru is love-

"Sasuke-kun," someone softly and shyly muttered as she stood beside the Uchiha who was now wearing their school's track suit. She jumped when her crush slammed his shoe locker closed.

"Fuck off!" Sasuke hissed, his eyes blazing with cold hatred before he walked away, leaving the girl to cry in pain. He had more reason to hate those girls. It was because of them that things between him and Naruto were going awry. It wasn't supposed to be that way. All his life, he had expected that his friendship with Naruto would be the only thing constant but…

-SasuNaru is love-

The student council president sighed in exasperation. "What do you mean you haven't chosen your vice-president yet? The other party already did. In fact their candidate presidency chose his vice-president first before filling other measly position."

"I hardly call the positions of secretary and PRO measly," Neji replied in his infuriatingly calm voice.

"They aren't going to be voted!"

The two looked at each other before the graduating teen sighed. "Can't you lower your standards?"

The Hyuuga crossed his arms. "I see no reason to do that."

The senior was close to banging his head. Why was talking to Hyuuga so difficult? "You don't have a vice-president because nobody meets your standard," he explained slowly.

"Actually there is someone," Hyuuga informed him. His uncanny eyes looking at a particular student through a window.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I haven't talked with him yet."

"Get on with it!" the older teen snapped while massaging his nose bridge.

-SasuNaru is love-

Luckily, Arashi wasn't there when Naruto came home but Itachi was and he looked disappointed.

"Your coming here meant you have a free time. How are you, Itachi?" Naruto said as he shrugged of his jacket.

"You wasted your time fighting again," Itachi stated blandly. "The shirt goes too," he ordered as he picked up the hot compressor the maid brought to Naruto's room together with the medicine kit.

"You sounded like my dad and you're ignoring my question."

"Your dad would sound more disappointed and you can ask me later when I'm done taking care of your injuries."

Naruto pouted but he obediently sat in front of the young man.

Itachi took a good look of the mess that was Naruto then sighed. "Am I to assume that the three of you settled things with a fistfight?"

"The archery team had a friendly match at another school. It was just Sasuke and," he paused as he glanced at his fists, "nothing had been settled." For every attack and burst of anger, a new confusion was burn. There were now a lot of things that were vague between them and it was driving him crazy.

"What was it this time? An agreement turned sour? A promise broken or just plain stupidity?"

Naruto shook his head before he started telling Itachi what happened without being too subjective.

"I see," Itachi said few minutes later.

"I don't understand why he is like that," the younger teen huffed.

"I'm certain Sasuke doesn't too," Itachi said. For someone who had watched the three grow; for someone who had watched their friendship mature, Itachi knew Sasuke had unconsciously crossed the line that separates friendship and love. And just like his brother, Naruto and Gaara were unaware of Sasuke's mistake. Instead of telling anything to Naruto, Itachi remained quiet. Let those three figure out the changes that were affecting them and their friendship.

"Itachi, what are you doing?" Naruto said warily.

"Dressing your wounds," the older male replied in his are-you-stupid look.

Hearing the reply made the blonde shiver as he remembered the time when Itachi took care of their wounds and they end up crying in pain because Itachi made a mistake. "I don't think that's a good idea. Here, give that kit to me," he said in a tone he used when coaxing one of his cats.

Itachi smirked. "I'll do it besides I did that on purpose."

"Lemme have it, you weasel!" Unable to stand it anymore, Naruto lunged forward and the two end up having a tug of war over the medicine kit.

While Naruto was wishing that his friendship with Sasuke was similar to that with Itachi- light and uncomplicated, Itachi was wishing that he could find a brother in Sasuke just as he did in Naruto.

Sasuke...

-SasuNaru is love-

Sasuke sat on the side of his bed, silent and unmoving. His wounds had been taken cared of by Mikoto who had scolded his son for fighting while doing so but most her words didn't sunk into the boy's stagnant mind. All he could think about was Naruto and their fight and he was still thinking even when a disappointed Mikoto left his room.

He had seen Naruto being hugged by a girl and because of that he had said those words…words that were hurtful… words that he really meant. Not only that but he…

"You really haven't change," Sasuke taunted as they circled around each other.

Naruto frowned. "You're wrong! I had changed too but you were too busy to notice until now. So go on and have a good look, bastard! Look at me so you'll notice how much I had changed."

Even if he didn't want to, his eyes took in his friend and he didn't like what it evoked in him. Wanting to squash the tingling sensation that was sweeping through his veins, he did what he could do at that moment. He punched the blonde and hard enough to snap the blonde's head to the left and cut his lips.

Sasuke had no idea what the hell was wrong with him. He knew there was something wrong with him. He had frequent wet dreams and there were feelings that were only awakened when Naruto was around. Although he was intelligent, he couldn't understand the emotions that made themselves present within him, and that was pissing him off to no end.

He gripped his head and without permission, tears started falling. They were tears of frustration, of confusion and misplaced anger. Reasons of what was happening to him were hidden behind that veil of mist and no matter how much he stretched his hand and blindingly reached for it, the answers were out of his reach.

He looked at his door when there was a knock on it.

Itachi stood by the door way and due to the darkness of the room he could only make out a thin silhouette until a streak of lightning flash across the gloomy sky. At that instant, two pairs of eyes locked on each other. Itachi was shocked to see the helpless and lost look on those watery eyes but a calm and indifferent look concealed that instantly. The older Uchiha knew there was nothing he could do now. Sasuke had withdrawn into his shell even before he could offer a help. Try as he might, everything would be lost to his brother who only saw him as a rival. When did the gap between them span this big? Moreover, when did this gap appear? Feeling helpless, Itachi just nodded and closed the door quietly.

Sasuke…

TBC

The chapter title says what Sasuke and Naruto are doing... I think. Until our next update... hopefully next week.