"Yes, that is HILARIOUS…now, puuhlease leave me alone!" Jackson exclaimed to his new friend, Thor, who was sitting in our living room.
"Hey Jackson!" I called cheerfully as I walked down the stairs, "Who's your new friend?"
Jackson shot me a glare and said in a stiff voice, "This is Thor. Thor, this is my sister Miley."
"Pleased to meet ya!! I'm Thor!" Thor exclaimed as he held his hand out to me. I smiled and shook it.
"Hello, Thor, nice accent! Where are you from?" I asked nicely.
"Oh me? Well I'm from—
"Please, spare everyone the story! Now, me and my lady gotta get to some TV watching! She's setting my hot, Latin blood on fire!" A voice exclaimed from the doorway. Rico walked in with a smile and I frowned.
"Sit down baby, let's get some CUDDLE TIME!" Rico exclaimed to me as he sat down on the couch.
"Well, if you say so! I haven't got asked this before though! The only other thing I've ever hugged was my cow!" Thor exclaimed as he put his arms around Rico, "Hug me little buddy!"
Rico threw Thor's arms off him and exclaimed, "Not you hamburger boy! The brunette señorita over here looking like a beautiful diamond in the world of horrible, cruel coal."
"Rico," I said as I sat down beside him, "We have been through this. I don't like you, I'm sorry!"
"You're just saying that, you know you can't resist this." Rico exclaimed as he threw his arms around me.
"Rico, you already stole a kiss out of me, what else do you want?" I asked.
A sly smile came over Rico's face, "Well since your asking—
"Never mind, bad question." I said quickly.
"No, good question baby!" Rico exclaimed. I rolled my eyes. He smiled and jumped on my lap,
"Daddy wants some love!" Rico exclaimed. I rolled my eyes and picked him off me,
"Okay listen here short stuff, I have a boyfriend. I'm not interested in you." I said.
"They all say that, you know you like things to be forbidden and naughty!" Rico said as he wiggled his eyebrows. I sighed,
"I'm being serious Rico. I have a boyfriend. And just so you know, he's about ten times your height."
"Is that supposed to make me feel threatened? Ha, I pity the boy that is going out with MY señorita; he has RICO to deal with!!"
I snorted, "Well I really don't think he will have to worry as long as you don't where a spiky hat, otherwise he can just step on you."
Rico put a hand to his heart, "Ow, that hurt baby. Call up this boyfriend and tell him to come here a.s.a.p. he needs to know you are taken!"
I rolled my eyes and said, "It really wouldn't be fair, tinny tiny coffins are going for a lot these days! Your parents might go into debt!"
"Just dial baby, while I check you out." Rico said as he winked at me. I scoffed in disgust. Oh well, he's had this coming to him for a long time. Every since the fool used his shortness to steal a kiss with me.
"Okay, if you say so." I shrugged. I just sat there and looked at my watch.
"Get to the dialing woman! I don't have all day; I'm working on a simple cure to cancer! A super genius only has so much time!" Rico exclaimed. I smiled at him and said,
"Don't worry, he should be here in a few minutes."
"Well in the mean time, let's talk about our future, baby." He said.
"Rico," I said, "We have NO future together!"
"Oh come on bubble brains, you need to marry rich to have a life and I am a child prodigy…we are the perfect match! Beauty and—
"The small, annoying beast?" I suggested with a smile.
"No, Beauty and the brains!" Rico said as he leaned over and wrapped his small…VERY small arm around me and said,
"Just think about it sugar lips, me and you…the open sea, the wind in your hair—
"I hope the wind is just a small gust because if it's anything bigger it might blow you away."
"The sun setting behind us, your lips kissing me, our skin touching, my Latin blood on fire, the beautiful piles of money all around us, the sweet sensation of being with RICO!!"
"You mean the sensation that I KNOW I'll always be taller than you?" I asked with a smirk.
"You may mock me in front of your brother, but I know deep down you are yearning for my touch---
"Who is yearning for someone's touch?" A confused voice asked at the doorway. I looked up to see my boyfriend, Jake Ryan, a.k.a. the cutest, sweetest, hottest guy on Earth.
"Rico, this is Jake. You know the boyfriend I was telling you about?" I said to Rico. Rico scowled and jumped away from me and in front of Jake.
"YOU! You are the one that is stealing my belleza!!" Rico screamed. Jake looked even more confused now.
"Uh…I'm sorry little guy."
"No you are not! And I am not little! I am in high school!" Rico screamed.
"Sorry and how can I mean it if I don't know what I took from you?" Jake asked.
"You took the brunette señorita that sets his Latin blood on fire," Thor said from where he was watching TV with Jackson, "Apparently the little guy has plans for them to get married and live on a yacht together with piles of cash."
Jake looked at Rico and busted out laughing. I tried to warn him not to because Rico is evil, but he wouldn't listen, "Okay so your telling me this little guy is claiming property of Miley and thinks they are going to get married!?"
"Laugh now meatloaf, I read it in my horoscope. And yes, Miley is mine. And there is nothing you can do about it." Rico said. I sighed and yanked Rico back on the couch,
"Ooh, I like 'em feisty!" Rico exclaimed.
"Shush it munchkin, I am not your property and we are not getting married!" I exclaimed.
"You say that now, but you will come running back to me. I know you will. Besides, if we don't get married I'll live with myself. Just as long as I get to see yourpulchritudinous self everyday and every night and check you out!" Rico exclaimed.
"Why does the kid have to use these big words! What is pull-couch-rit-darious??" Jake asked in confusion. Rico sighed,
"He is very, very stupid. I say dump him why you still have three brain cells left. Pulchritudinous means beautiful, Einstein."
"Look here baby Satan," Jake said, "You are getting on my nerves."
"Well what are you going to do about it, you hebetudinous fool!" Rico exclaimed.
"I—
Jake didn't have a chance to speak because Rico kicked him very hard in the shin, sending him down. Rico sat on top of the fallen zombie slayer and said,
"Bet you like the view from down there? Now, you leave and let me check out my beauty but no brains woman."
Jake scowled and Rico stood up and kicked him again before blowing me a kiss and saying,
"I'll see you soon baby."
Rico walked out and I looked at Jake and shook my head,
"Shame, shame, shame. Beaten by a two foot little boy."
Jake stood up and sat down beside me before saying, "I could have taken him, I just didn't want to hurt the little guy."
"I'm sure," I said with humor webbed in my voice, "He's really irritating me."
"Well just relax with me baby." Jake said with a smile. I laughed and kissed him. That kiss soon turned into a make-out session.
"HEY! STOP THAT!" Jackson screamed as he hit me in the head with a magazine. I broke away from Jake and said,
"Oh like you don't bring your girlfriends over and do gosh knows what! Don't be a hypocrite!"
"Oh let 'em kiss Jackson," Thor said with a geeky smile, "That's how you was created!"
I glared at Thor and Jackson said with a disgusted and disturbed look on his face, "Thor, get out."
"What? Buddy I was just—
"Out!" Jackson exclaimed then turned to me and Jake,
"Okay listen here zombie boy, here are the rules. No touching, no making out, no impregnating my sister! Got it!"
"Jackson, stop harassing!" I screamed.
"I'm just looking out for you sister, if I don't you might end up getting pregnant at 17!!"
"Jackson that is ridicules! Like that would ever happen!"
"Hey everyone!" Lilly exclaimed as she came in.
"Lilly! Please tell Jackson to shut up!"
"Ooook. Jackson, shut up." Lilly sat as she plopped down on the couch in between Jake and Jackson.
"Miley, you need to start brushing your hair! It's all over the place! And what did we say about doing our lipstick when we are half asleep? And Jake, you aren't supposed to wear lipstick! What are you coming out or something?" Lilly said all that in one breath. We stared at her.
"You scare me." I said.
"AND ANOTHER THING YOU SANCTIMONIOUS PIMP--" Rico screamed as he came back in carrying pitchfork. Lilly's eyes widened,
"I take Rico met Jake?"
I nodded. "Rico, put down the pitchfork."
"Don't Rico me woman! You are such a tease! Putting me on like that when you had a boyfriend!!"
"I did not put you on!"
"You kissed me! On the lips!"
"You kissed him?!" Jake exclaimed.
"NO! I mean, yes but he tricked me! There was a wet smelly monkey, a banana and beary…oh and a cell phone that squirts water!" I exclaimed.
"It wasn't just me, Jake," Rico said with an angry look at me, "There was three other boys too. Me, Johnny, and Lilly's boyfriend---
"You kissed your brother?!" Lilly exclaimed with disgust written all over her face.
"Ew!! NO!" I screamed.
"She's just a little prostitute." Rico said.
"You kissed Johnny?" Jake exclaimed.
"No I did not kiss Johnny! Rico is just mad because I will never love him!" I exclaimed.
Rico's face fell and his eyes got all glossy, "Aw! Miley! Look at him!" Lilly cooed as if he was a tiny baby.
"I'm lookin'." I said as I looked at his pitiful face, "And I'm not impressed."
"He looks like he swallowed a glass of sour milk." Jake stated as he looked at Rico. I squinted my eyes and pictured it,
"Hey! Your right!" I exclaimed.
"I'm ALWAYS right." Jake said. I smiled and Jake leaned in and kissed me. It was one of those sweet, romantic kisses that are in those romantic movies where they play that soft, romantic song. You know that song that usually has people running through a field of wild flowers, reaching out for each other, and wearing spring dresses….No, well that's the song I mean.
It was totally perfect, and guess who ruined it.
Okay, if you are trying to guess you are slow because that's a rhetorical question…I mean it wouldn't be right for it to be a real question because it's too darn easy! But wouldn't it be nice if your teacher but that question on a test? I'd totally ace it. I might even beat Rico.
We both know THAT will never happen but a girl can dream. Okay, I'm getting sidetracked. Back to reality,
"AHHH! GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY WOMAN!" A shrill voice called before Rico tackled Jake to the ground and started hitting him with his fists.
"Rico!" I growled before trying to grab him, "Stop hitting him!"
As I reached out to grab Rico, Thor stood up at the same time and accidentley ran into me which sent me off balance. I fell over and landed on top of Rico, who was on top of Jake, who was on top of the floor, which was on top of the house, which was on top on the ground—I'll stop now.
Rico didn't seize his kicks so I rolled off him and said, "Rico! Stop hitting!"
"Okay!" Came his muffled cry as a much different cry came from underneath him.
"Stop biting me!" Jake called as he tried to get Rico off him without hurting him. God, this boy had TOO much patients. I would have smacked Rico by now.
"For Heaven's sake, stop!" I screamed as I hit Rico on the back of the head. Rico grabbed my arm and pulled my over closer to them and his frantic hitting began again.
I tried to stand up but the little brat grabbed my ankle. A few minutes of struggling later, we were all lying on the floor panting.
"This is awkward." I voiced to Jake. Rico was lying on top of both of us. Occasionally he would kick Jake.
"Maybe to you baby, but as long as I'm with you nothing is awkward."
I groaned in annoyance.
"WHOA! What is going on HERE?" Dad screamed as he came in the house. His eyes were wide and he almost dropped the grocerys.
Me and Jake pointed at Rico, who smiled and said in his I'm-just-a-sweet-innocent-little-boy voice,
"Jake was beating me up."
A/n: Haha, okay so I FINALLY updated! I'm sorry it took so long, things are just happening here. On the bright side, the freshman/sophomore yearbooks came out and I got best smile AND most school spirit!!! I was so excited! I tried all year for best smile but most school spirit was a cool surprise! But I guess when I'm standing on the field doing more screaming at our team and the other team than cheerleading one can only take me as absolutly crazy or full of spirit...(I personally think it's the first one but ooook) Anyways, that got me in the right mood to forget the bad stuff and write some more so if you like it and want to read some more...REVIEW.