Theme #19 – red.

Disclaimer: same as before.

Note: Crack.

To make up for the semi-angst last time, I opted to write some humorous semi-fluff. Enjoy. :)

Dedicated to my brother, who hopefully will never see this, but his face was my inspiration for this story.

---What's That on Your Face, Sasuke-kun?---

"Morning, Sasuke-kun! Wake up, wake up, wake up! Are you awake yet? Do I need to sing a good morning---"

Head poking out from under the covers, Sasuke reached over and hurriedly turned off the alarm before Sakura's off-key voice could burst into song. He rolled over onto her side of the bed and stared lazily at the ceiling, as he waited for his sleep-blurred eyes to focus.

Bright blinding rays of mid-morning sunshine burst through the equally blinding pink curtains that Sakura had so carefully chosen. He propped himself up on one elbow and squinted at the time.

8: 45.

A small smile almost crept onto his face as he realized that Sakura had reset his alarm clock to let him sleep in later. She must have noticed how exhausted he was upon his return from the two week mission in the Sand. The trip back hadn't been pleasant; they had run into several difficulties that had to be dealt with.

Things could have been handled much better, mused Sasuke as he rubbed his aching shoulder. With an inaudible sigh, he swung his legs over and onto the floor and groggily made his way to the bathroom.

----------

Sasuke could get slightly careless in the mornings. Easy proof was in the way he splashed cold water over his face, and somehow, it ended up everywhere else around him. Sakura would have a fit when she came back for lunch.

He scowled as he remembered that Naruto was expecting him at nine o'clock, and he still hadn't finished that mission report.

As he reached for the pink little washcloth on the pink plastic towel rack (Sakura clearly had a fetish with pink), he glanced up at the mirror to gauge just how badly his perfectly spiked hair had been marred by the previous night's activities.

But instead of the messy mop of hair, he zeroed in on the center of his face, and his eyes widened with pure unadulterated horror.

----------

Sakura smiled gently as she closed the door to the children's ward. Something about their easy and unguarded smiles, so full of hope, always tugged at her heartstrings. Sasuke might consider that a weakness, but to her, it only meant that she loved children. And that maybe it was time to finally have one of her own.

But Sasuke… Sakura grinned at the thought of Sasuke being a father. She could just see him, looking extremely awkward while holding a squirming baby in his arms and trying his best not to frighten him, but at the same time, desperately wanting to wipe that inexhaustible smile off the baby's innocent face.

"Sakura-chan!"

Sakura turned at the sound of her name, though she already had a pretty good idea who the owner of the voice was.

Amusedly, she leaned against the wall and watched as Konoha's beloved and well-respected Hokage flew through the hospital corridors, leaping over patients and medics as if they were merely hurdles on a racetrack.

Naruto skidded to a stop in front of her, caught his hat as it fell off, and jammed it nonchalantly back onto his head.

"You know," Sakura said. "A normal person would just walk through and ask people to move aside."

He tilted his hat at her. "Ah, but I'm not a normal person. I am… Naruto! The Sixth Hokage of Konoha!" Striking a heroic pose, he flashed a flirtatious grin at a passing kunoichi, who blushed red and scampered off.

Sakura swatted his shoulder. "Can you not? Haruko-chan's eleven years younger than you."

"I can't help it if the ladies are naturally attracted to me," replied Naruto unapologetically.

"You're disgusting," Sakura threw back as she steered him towards her office. "Why can't you find someone to settle down with?"

Though no one dared eavesdrop on them, people stopped what they were doing to watch their Hokage throw his arms out in one of his many expressive gestures.

Sakura didn't even wait for him to finish talking before interjecting, "I don't believe you. Are you sure it's not because you're gay?"

She grinned to herself as he froze mid-step and spun around very slowly.

"What?"

"It makes a lot of sense though," Sakura thoughtfully tapped her chin. "You've never been on any dates. You spend most of your time in meetings with the council or your captains, all of which are male. And last week, I heard you tell Shika, 'It wouldn't work out.' He must have been devastated."

By now, Naruto's face had turned a lovely shade of red. "Shikamaru and I were discussing mission plans… And since when did you start listening in on private conversations?"

Sakura opened her mouth to reply, but Naruto hastily said, "No. Don't answer that. But explain to me why I would flirt with females if I was clearly interested in males?"

Blinking, Sakura inwardly wondered when Naruto had become so much smarter. "Well, I suppose you just pretend to, because you don't want to risk your –"

She was cut off with a snort. "Nice try, Sakura. And speaking of Sasuke –"

"Which we weren't," interrupted Sakura.

He frowned at her. "Silence while your Hokage speaks."

Suddenly, a sly glint appeared in his eyes. It was much too easy to get back at Sakura; almost took the fun out of it. Almost. In an abnormally loud and clear voice, he said, "I can't believe you kept Sasuke up all night. That was so insensitive of you, Sakura."

"… You're so immature. It's hard to believe you turned twenty-six last month." Sakura rolled her eyes and tried to force down the blush that was slowly rising up her neck.

Naruto smirked, knowing without looking that everyone had their eyes glued to Sakura. It was amusing to see how even after eight years, people had yet to tire of Sasuke and Sakura gossip. Perhaps it was because so little had been circulated. Sasuke was very much into personal privacy.

"Now that we are speaking of Sasuke, where the hell is he?"

----------

Thirty minutes had elapsed, and Sasuke had yet to move from his original spot in front of the sink.

This could not be happening.

This could not be real.

He was twenty-six years old.

These things didn't happen at this age!

And he had never gotten a single one when he was young, why the hell should it start now?

He was no longer an awkward fumbling teenage shinobi, but a highly renowned ANBU captain, and goddamnit, how was he supposed to go out like this?

Hoping against hope, Sasuke activated his Sharingan, but he soon realized that it was, unfortunately, no illusion.

Curiosity got the best of him, and he gingerly poked it, but almost instantly retracted his finger. It was disgusting. For a moment, he considered digging around in Sakura's cabinet of cosmetics, but he swiftly dispelled that thought. He would rather die than walk around in public wearing make-up.

Not knowing what else to do, he stalked grumpily back to their bedroom.

Sakura had better not be coming home to eat.

----------

"Honestly, Naruto," said Sakura as she held the gate open for him. "You didn't have to come along. I could just send him over to you after lunch."

Naruto waved her offer away. "It's alright. Besides, I'd rather visit him as a friend, instead of his superior."

Clearly, the excitement over being more important than Sasuke had not yet died down, and Sakura struggled to suppress a smile. Until she caught sight of a small digital camera, dangling from Naruto's hand.

"Are you sure you're not here to try to catch Sasuke in an embarrassing moment of some sort?"

Naruto blinked, and then hurriedly began snapping pictures of the garden.

"Why… no. Sakura. I just think your house is so beautiful. I need inspiration for my own."

"Right…"

He was still as lame as ever.

----------

"Sasuke-kun? Sasuke-kun, where are you?"

"Sasuke! Come down and bow before your Hokage, teme!"

"I thought you said you were here to visit him as a friend."

"… Changed my mind. As Hokage, I'm allowed to do that."

Sakura sighed and pulled out three packages of instant ramen.

"Here," She tossed them to Naruto. "I'm going to go look for Sasuke."

She received a disapproving frown in return. "I'm a guest here, Sakura. Aren't you at least going to make them for me?"

She gave him a withering look and walked off in the direction of the master bedroom.

Slowly, Sakura pushed the door open, wondering if Sasuke was indeed still asleep.

"Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke's face was nowhere in sight, but she had a sneaking suspicion that the blanket-swathed lump in the middle of the bed just so happened to be her beloved boyfriend.

How could anyone sleep like that, she wondered. Even his head was buried beneath the pink comforter. It would be a miracle if he hadn't already suffocated. With an exasperated sigh, she pushed at the lump.

"Sasuke-kun, wake up."

The lump spoke back, and she jumped at the clarity of his voice; he had been awake all along.

"I am. Now go away."

Annoyed, she shoved him again. "Get up. You missed your meeting with Naruto."

"I'll go see him tomorrow."

"Why the hell are you hidden in there?"

"…"

"Sasuke, this is ridiculous. Come out of there."

She could picture the scowl on his face as he responded. "No."

"Sasuke…"

He ignored the warning tone, though he knew he would pay dearly for it. "Go away. Don't you have to get back to work?"

"That can wait." Sakura grabbed hold of the comforter and yanked.

…

The veins were beginning to pop out of her neck. Sasuke had obviously expected her to do that and prepared for it thusly, so instead of seeing a scrunched up Sasuke on the bed, she saw a scrunched up Sasuke with yet another blanket over him.

She had no idea what was wrong with him, and this situation baffled her. Sasuke had never done anything like this before. It was so completely… un-Sasuke-like.

Time to change tactics.

Crawling onto the bed beside him, she leaned against the lump, which instantly stiffened. Perfect.

"Sasuke-kun," she murmured in a cajoling tone. "What's wrong? You can tell me anything, you know that."

She rubbed what she assumed was his shoulder, but it was a little hard to tell given the circumstances. For all she knew, she could be rubbing his head, which she knew he would absolutely hate.

"Sasuke-kun…"

"… You can't laugh."

Aha. Now, they were getting somewhere.

Sakura added more honey to her voice, until it was dripping with sticky sweetness. "You know I would never do that. Just come out of there. I'm afraid you'll run out of oxygen." Stupid. That doesn't sound romantic at all.

"…"

The lump rose, and gradually, the blanket was peeled away, revealing the apathetic face of her beautiful Sasuke-kun.

She stared.

And stared.

Apparently, shock had robbed her of her speech.

Sasuke suffered through three whole minutes of agonizing silence, before she finally found her voice again.

"Sasuke-kun, is that… Is that a pimple on your face?"

----------

Naruto had always been rather impatient. And even though his days as a hasty and rash genin were far behind him, patience was still a quality he lacked.

He had already finished eating his ramen. And some leftover salad. And a few club sandwiches in the fridge. And two packages of vanilla wafers from the pantry. And Sakura's not-so-secret stash of chocolates for that time of the month. And a whole container of homemade butter mochi.

But now, he was almost full and rather bored. Was Sasuke ever going to come down? Was it that hard for Sakura to…

No.

No way.

Sakura would not do that.

Sakura-chan would never do that.

But Sasuke, that retard…

Naruto could easily imagine Sakura going to wake Sasuke up, and Sasuke, being the complete idiot he was, dragging her down onto the bed for a baby-making session.

He shuddered at the thought. Although, he wasn't hearing any loud thumping or moans, which was definitely a good sign. But maybe the walls were just soundproof; he had no way of knowing, and soundproof walls sounded like something Sasuke would invest in.

Should he leave and come back later? He didn't think the meeting was worth gouging out his eyes for.

But then again, he thought, as he felt the weight of the camera in his pocket. This would be some juicy news to spread. And it would be with proof.

----------

"Are you done staring?"

Apparently not, because Sakura's emerald eyes were still glued to the bump on his face.

To be honest, calling that disfiguration a "bump" was being far too kind. Sakura had seen her fair share of blemishes in the teenagers at the hospital, and this one was most definitely a serious one.

Sakura's mind scrambled to come up with the right words. She didn't want to lie and tell him that it was really no big deal; it was only a small speck on his otherwise gorgeous face. But neither did she think it appropriate to say that the left side of his nose now harbored a huge-red-angry-disgusting-oily pimple.

Crossing his arms, Sasuke glared at her. "Just say it. I know you want to."

She crossed her arms as well. Why was he getting upset with her? "Frankly, I have nothing to say. I'm speechless."

"Pft."

"Don't get mad at me. I didn't make this happen."

He pulled the blanket over his head again. "Now that you've seen it, go away."

She pulled the blanket away. "It's fine. It'll go away in a few days."

"Hn."

"Come and eat."

Sasuke ignored the tug of his arm.

"Sasuke-kun, what's wrong?"

Never had she seen him so uncomfortable. The tenseness in his shoulders had not yet disappeared. His fists were clenched so tightly his knuckles had turned white. And although his face was impassive as always, his eyes revealed a sort of anxiousness that no one would ever suspect an Uchiha of displaying.

"Sasu—"

"Are you okay with it?" Am I no longer perfect in your eyes?

Sakura looked confused, before realization dawned in her eyes. In response, she felt herself melting. Who would have thought that Uchiha Sasuke, of all people, could become so insecure? And over something as trivial as a pimple, no less.

He was much too adorable, she thought, as she leaned in and pressed her lips to his. She felt his lips twitch against hers in what she knew was his smile, however small it may be.

Click.

They broke apart at the sound of the shutter.

Naruto's gleeful face beamed at them from the doorway.

"I finished the ramen and decided to –"

Taking a few steps forward, Naruto's eyes bulged. "Holy crap, Sasuke. Your face!"

Naruto started laughing uncontrollably, much to the chagrin of Sasuke and the amusement of Sakura, who tried to hide her smile.

"Dobe, if you breathe a word to any—"

The Rokudaime whipped up his camera and clicked away furiously. "Don't worry, teme. I won't say anything – I'll just show them!"

Cackling evilly, he sped out the door.

Sasuke leapt off the bed and followed, his hands in a flurry of seals. "KATON –"

Horrified, Sakura jumped to her feet as well. "Sasuke! Not in the house!"

---owari---

A/N: Not much to say, besides the fact that I really enjoyed imagining how Naruto would be when he became Hokage. Part of me wants to think he'll mature, but a bigger part of me doubts that he would ever stray from his "fun-loving" ways.

Hope you guys enjoyed it. :)