A/N: yay, second update of the night! Lol. I am so sorry I didn't update sooner. I feel bad about it, I really do. I hope you guys still stick with this story and I'll try to give you something to compensate for the wait. Again, I am sorry and I'll try updating more often. Enjoy!

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Lately I've been wondering who I am
because it's coming clear that there's
a world of things
that I don't quite understand

Lucas stared at Brooke then at Peyton and then back again at Brooke. Maybe we should talk…maybe we should talk…maybe we should talk…Peyton's words were still echoing in his mind before he could even manage to understand what they were about. Something was wrong. Their face, their look, their face…something is wrong…something's not going well. They're talking about an accident…what accident…we need to talk…god he hated that sentence. That never means something good. Talking always means something bad. Usually, an accident is bad, right. Bad news. By their looks, the neighbor could guess they were about to say something bad. What happened during the year Lucas couldn't remember? He stared at the two girls, trying to see right through them. Tried to see if he could read them but to no avail, both girls were as cold as broken glass.

"What is it?" he finally asked, his voice cracking and not expecting anything from what was about to come. They started it now they had to finish it. He thought about Haley and how she was waiting for him now. God he wanted her to be there and support him since she was the only one who really stayed like the good old Haley he knew.

"Lucas…there is some things you need to know" Brooke said.

"Like what?" he snapped in impatience.

"There has been a lot of things happening in the year you forgot" Peyton started.

"Tell me, please. I want to know. I feel so lost" he persisted.

"First of all, something really bad happened after your fight with Haley"

"When I went to get my mom?"

"Yes…you and Keith had…kind of a car accident" Brooke explained.

"Really bad car accident" Peyton added.

Lucas nodded to every word trying to make sense of what was being said to him. Okay, car accident, really bad, when getting his mom, okay…Upon seeing his nods, the girls went on.

"Keith was out really fine…just a couple of stitches…" Brooke said.

"So he was ok?"

"Yes"

"That's good. That's really good" Lucas said, his tone was almost frantic. It looked like he was on the verge of a mental breakdown. The poor kid seemed totally out of it. That was all Lucas. Taking care of others before he even cared about himself.

"But you were not so well…", Peyton swallowed hard on those words.

"What about it?"

"Dan is the one who saw the accident…he was there and pulled you two out of the car and drove you to the hospital…" Brooke thought of adding.

"They say he saved your life…" Peyton added barely above a whisper. Her voice was barely inaudible.

Both girls looked down for a second. This was an extremely hard conversation to have. Lucas finally broke the silence.

"How long have I been out?"

"Just a few days…you needed physical therapy for your shoulder though after dislocating it in the crash"

Lucas nodded. It was hard to hear but he didn't show any of it, he just nodded to encourage the girls to go further. During the following hour, they filled him up with information starting from his discharge of the hospital to the lake accident going around the story with stuff like Jake and Jenny, Felix, Anna, Keith and Jules, Keith leaving town, his mom and Andy, the Tric, Nathan and Haley's wedding, Chris, Haley leaving on tour, Nathan crashing the car, Uncle Cooper, Rachel, the Ravens and their bad luck and many other things they thought important that Lucas should know.

--

Haley and Karen were sitting in the kitchen around the table. Coffee mugs in hands and empty plates facing them, they were talking about the wedding that almost killed everyone.

"So, with all that happened I didn't really have the chance to tell you how much I'm happy for your marriage!" Karen declared.

"Thanks…even if that wedding almost killed all the people I care about…if I can get a hand on that Rachel" Haley was getting angry now and Karen could see it as her knuckles were turning white from grabbing the mug to tight. The old woman just smiled and didn't think it was that important for her to add something so she didn't.

The door opened and a really-lost looking Lucas entered the house. Over everything, he looked really pissed off. He stared at the girls for a second. They seemed happy with their little coffee mugs and their already eaten breakfasts. Hypocrites. They hid everything from him. How could they pretend that nothing happened after everything he heard?

"Oh my, I'm sorry we didn't wait you Luke. Is it okay?" Haley said blushing slightly.

"How could you?"

"How could I what? Eat dinner without you?" she asked.

"Hide all the truth from me"

"What are you talking about?" Karen asked now taking place in the conversation.

"I wouldn't be so pissed if the things you all didn't tell weren't so big…"

"What are you…"

"I was at Peyton's…let's say that her and Peyton were not so hypocrites and told me everything that's happened since the year I don't remember"

The smiles that were on the girl's faces merely seconds ago died and let their place to weird expressions, pretty much indescribable so Lucas couldn't know what they were thinking of it all but then neither did Karen and Haley knew what Lucas was thinking about all of this. After all, what did he know?

I've always tried to look straight in the eyes
I try to see the man I try to see the plan
I try to know what's on his mind
but I never thought that I'd have to stare at you
no I never thought that someone so close
could be so far from view

Lucas made a disgusted grimace and walked away, passed the table and the kitchen. Haley ran up to him.

"Lucas, wait!"

"Is there anything else I should know?"

"What did they tell you exactly?"

"Pretty much everything…"

"Then why are you asking what we're not telling you?"

"I don't know…I just thought you guys were my friends and could've told me that when I woke up and didn't know who I was…" Lucas spat coldly. Haley's mouth moved for a second but no sound came out of it. She was paralyzed by Lucas' coldness. In a way, he was right.

He was right that haven't really been good friends. They should have told him everything it just seemed so hard. How could you tell someone about all the crap that happened in his life? Maybe this way, without knowing, he could've started over and be another person. Now that the revelations were made, he would have to deal with the past all over again. The Lucas she knew had troubles dealing with it all. It was just too much for a normal person to carry on her back without having it breaking. How did this kid do to make it through with all this shit going on in his life? Just with the stuff she lived, Haley felt exhausted and overwhelmed. She almost lost her husband and her best friend and her marriage was ruined because of a brat that caused a scene at the wedding and stole the limo then caused the death of Nathan's uncle by sending it under water.

Lucas was thinking back everything that happened and maybe it was time he faced it and moved on. He could feel old Lucas still didn't overcome but he could. He could do it now. He was going to. This was time to forgive and forget and start a new life. Maybe that would be for the best…

well I guess it's time for me to realize
that trust is just a word
not something I ever knew
but whatcha gonna do

The next few days, Lucas took them to rest and get some strength back before he had to face school again. This part was going to be the hardest but Haley promised to tutor him and help him catch up with what he missed. She even started giving him some lessons during the day he was resting. How surprised was he when he realized that he could do a lot more than he thought. Maybe his body didn't remember doing it but the brains didn't forget. There was some stuff he could do but could not explain it. It was just happening and he knew what he was talking about even thought he missed that part of memory.

At the end of the week he went to a check up at the doctor's, just to make sure everything was fine. Haley asked his doctor if it was normal that Lucas could make out some part of the things he didn't remember and the man told him that it was totally fine. The heart could never forget, he said. For the other things, Lucas' brain was just working to try to be back the way it used to be and try to remember what he still couldn't even though Peyton and Brooke told him almost everything. Almost. Neither could bring herself to tell him about Keith's death part. They told him at the hospital that he was out of town and honestly hoped they wouldn't have to tell him the truth or he wouldn't want to go to his research.

School was coming faster and faster and Lucas was staring to have bad dreams. Bribes of memory were coming back to him while he slept and that wasn't always something good. He would wake up in sweat, his heart racing. Sometimes, Karen heard his screaming and went by his side, rocking him like a baby till he fell back asleep.

'cause my dreams leave me cold and empty now
you know I tried so hard to laugh
but I just don't know how

Lucas' first school day was finally there and they all agreed to go with him and support him. As a group, they would face everything if they stayed together and strong.

Haley squeezed Lucas' hand in front of the school alley. They watched the students go in and out. Haley stared at Lucas. He looked as lost as he looked many days ago when he didn't even know who he was. Brooke and Peyton were on the other side of him and Nathan was behind Haley.

"I don't know if I can go" Lucas said coldly.

"Come on Luke, we're here. Everything will be okay!"

"But someone died here"

"We know Lucas…but you see these people, they know too and the world is still spinning even if sometimes it seems madly, the world is still there and one day, you'll have to face it"

Lucas swallowed then decided to take a step forward. He arranged it with his mom so he would only have to go through a half day then it would slowly go back to normal. Haley held his hand while they walked on the school grounds. A girl stopped her walk and turned toward Lucas and his friends. Lucas saw her and his eyes widened.

His mouth fell and he could swear his legs were gonna give out. He felt the warmth of the day so hot that he wondered if he wasn't going to pass out. The girl came closer and offered him only a nod before passing the friends and walking inside the building.

Haley seemed to be boiling in anger then she turned to Lucas and saw his face. Now she couldn't help but laugh.

"Who is that?" Lucas asked, his mouth dry. "She's a babe" he said on the tone a geek would use when he realizes he has sexual feelings for the first time.

Brooke had noticed Lucas face and it hurt her so much.

"That" she said so coldly, "…was Rachel"

"Rachel..it's her?!?!?" Lucas asked seeing the redheaded girl nod again in his mind. Nathan was biting his cheek so much he wanted to laugh and knock some sense out of his nut brother. The girls just rolled their eyes and pulled Lucas inside the school.

The first half day wasn't so bad. Lucas recognized most of the people and teacher he already knew. He didn't feel to bad and finally realized that he did not miss that much things. It would be easy to go back to the way it was. For once, he felt like everything was going to be okay.

He went home in the middle of the day and had the biggest surprise he could expect.

'cause wrapped around the thought of everything
are the hands of a thief
who took that trust from me
but whatcha gonna do

His mom was talking with the devil. Dan. Dan Scott meant everything bad to him. Especially after what he did to Keith. How dared he come back now and talk with his mom. Lucas cleared his throat just loud enough for them to hear. Dan turned his face and saw his older son standing in the doorway. Without a sound, he walked over to him and hugged him.

Startled, Lucas pulled away quickly.

"I'm so glad to see you're okay, son"

"I'm not your son!"

Dan's face changed and it looked almost cruel. He had a naughty smile on. The one Lucas hated so much.

"What do you mean, I'm your dad. It's because of me if you're here today"

"So what now, I should say thanks to you for fucking my mom"

Karen let out a small scream of terror. Since when had Lucas become so harsh and cold? Lucas never swore. She knew it. Her son never swore unless something was really wrong.

"How dare you?" Dan said.

"I bet you tell yourself that I owe you"

"You do. After everything I've done for you"

"Like what? Saving my life? If that was just to make yourself look better or just to get something from me, you could've just let me die"

Karen's eyes were glistening in tears. She had never heard that side of her son. What made him so angry? He was happy all week long and now Dan was there and he was so cold. She didn't recognize him anymore. Dan was starting to get pissed off and god knows that when Dan is mad, some stuff might just slip…

whatcha gonna do
About the things that happen suddenly
about the things that I could never see
all the times I've sat and bought the lie
all the times I've laughed and wondered why

"You're talking about that accident? Well, you're right. I should've just let you die. Just to bad these doctors were able to bring you back…I should have signed the papers that said 'do not revive'" Dan spat. Lucas felt the words like if they were each a stab he got. That made a lot of potentially fatal wound that were threatening his life just like the words were threatening his sanity.

"Dan, do not talk like this to my son!" Karen shouted.

"Don't interrupt Karen. This is a conversation between my son and I"

Karen walked in front of Dan and posted himself right under his nose. "Lucas is MY SON so if you want to say anything like this to him, you'll have to walk over my dead body!" she spat. Lucas pushed his mom aside.

"Mom, let me take care of this" he said.

"You look so much like your uncle Keith!" Dan said in amusement.

"Yeah because he was my real dad and it's your fault he's gone"

Dan's naughty smile died on his face.

"You're the one who made him leave town!" Lucas shouted through gritted teeth.

"What are you talking about, joker? Your so-loved uncle is dead!" Dan snapped.

I realized I was owned by my defenses
never took the time never saw my chances
always thought the people coming round
was just another person trying to bring me down
but yeah whatcha gonna do

Lucas' face changed. His expression was gone. His face was blank.

"What…"

Yeah watcha gonna do

Yeah watcha gonna do

Yeah watcha gonna do

Yeah…

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Well I hope I made it up to you with this so long chapter and of course, I hope you enjoyed. Don't forget to leave me those little reviews I love so much. You guys are so sweet that I always love reading them. Tell me what you thought. You guys take care!

PS. song's from sprung monkey