Sept. 10, 1974

It has been ten fucking days, and all James can talk about is Lily and that hickey. And saying phrases like "I'm going to kill that bastard," or "I can't believe she did this to us." Hell, if he doesn't stop complaining, I'll tell him that I'm the bastard he's looking for. So he can just kill me and put me out of my misery.

Kill me, kill me

"Sirius, do you want me to kill you for that?" James growled, pointing his wand at the boy beside him.

Sirius turned back to his breakfast. "Please do." James poked his wand against his best friend's head. "It was just a suggestion. Nothing more, nothing less." He turned to Remus, whose face was buried in his book, and Peter, who laughed behind his hands. James' face turned red and he exclaimed, "She is not gay or bisexual!"

"All I'm saying is, if she is gay or bisexual, or both, you—"

"Wait, how can you be both bisexual and gay?"

"Because you can, Remus." Sirius drawled. "Now as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted…" He cast a quirked eyebrow at Remus, who shrugged in amusement, and continued,

"If she's gay, bisexual, or both, then—"

"You can't be both."

"For the love of Merlin, Remus, yes you can."

"No, you can't."

"Yes, you can."

"No, you can't."

"Yes, you can!"

"No, you can't!"

"Yes, you can!"

"No. You can't!"

"Yes, you can!"

"Then you can be both straight and bisexual?"

"No, you can't!"

"But you can be both gay and bisexual…?"

"Yes!"

"Are you even listening to yourself?!"

"Are you listening to yourself?"

"You can't be both, Sirius."

"Yes…you…" A hand on his should stopped him.

"Let me handle this." James cleared his throat and explained, in a voice much like that of Professor McGonagall, "You can be gay and bisexual, but not straight and bisexual. You can be gay and bisexual, because you like both boys and girls, but like your own sex more than the opposite one, thus making you gay and bisexual. But you cannot be straight and bisexual for the simple fact as follows: if you like both boys and girls the same, then you're bi, but you can also like the opposite more than the same, because one outweighs the other."

"…Oh, I get it now!" Peter leaped out of his seat and enthusiastically clapped his hands.

"Thank you, Professor Potter, for that wonderful explanation." Sirius smirked.

"You're quite welcome, Professor Black."

"And while I'm that it, I'll reward Mister Pettigrew 10 points for not being as brainless of a troll as we all thought." Peter smiled proudly at this comment. "And Mister Lupin, detention with Professor McGonagall for not understanding the concepts of straight, gay, bi, and both."

"And James wonders why she doesn't like him." Remus muttered with a roll of his eyes.

"Now, Professor Black, if you would be so kind as to continue?"

"Of course, Professor Potter. Now, if the lovely Lillian Evans is gay, bi, or both, then you could—theoretically speaking, of course—sleep with both girls and be satisfied. I know I would. Trust me, it's a wonderful and satisfying experience to try." James nodded in mock fascination, rubbing his chin.

"That may very well, but sheis not gay, bi, or both. OK?!"

"Okay, okay! I'm just saying, what other reason is there? After all…" Sirius made a baby face and pinched James' cheeks annoyingly. "You are so sexy! Yes, you are! Yes, you are!"

"Stop it!" He laughed. "I'm serious!"

"No, I'm Sirius, and I siriusly see no other reason."

"Maybe she has tasted," Remus murmured under his breath.

"What was that, Remus?"

"Nothing, James, I said she…just walked in." They turned to see three females walking together into the Great Hall.

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"Come on, Lily!" Alice cried behind her friend, who stayed annoyingly tight-lipped. "Please, just tell us his name, or at least give us a hint!"

"

Please? Aren't we your best friends?" Mekia pouted.

"Please?"

"Please?!"

"Pretty please?!" The girls pleaded together.

"Okay, okay, okay!" Lillian sighed in frustration. "I'll give you a hint." She glanced at her best friends as she spoke. They were both beautiful in comparison to her—Alice, with her lively eyes, flowing hair and creamy skin; Mekia, with her chocolate-brown skin, soft mocha eyes, and shoulder-length black hair made her easily the most beautiful girl at Hogwarts. She made the boys go wild.

Sometimes Lillian had to wonder how she became friend with them, when they were so resplendent and she so plain. She honestly didn't see why Sirius called her gorgeous, and she blushed from just the thought of him.

"Lily!" Alice's voice snapped Lillian out of her reverie. "Look, are you going to tell us or not?!"

"Oh look, she's blushing, Alice, from just thinking about him." Mekia smirked.

"No, I'm not!" Lillian spluttered.

"Or maybe from what he did to her." Mekia said slyly. Lillian reddened brightly and cleared her throat.

"As I was saying…" She stopped upon noticing the last person she wanted to see in front of her. She quirked her eyebrow and crossed her arms. "Yes, how may I help you?" She said sarcastically.

"Well, I…I mean, we,that's Sirius and me…" James gestured to the others behind him for support, which they averted their eyes. He grinned sheepishly at the girls when he saw that he was by himself. Lillian and her friends tapped their feet expectantly. "Uh, we were wondering if whoever gave you that hickey was a girl or a boy." The young sorceress stared at him, dumbfounded.

"Are…are you implying that I'm gay?" Her voice was low and incredulous.

"No, no, not gay, exactly…maybe bisexual, or—" Pumpkin juice thrown in his face punctuated his words and he blinked the stinging liquid out of his eyes as his friends laughed at him. Once he properly regained his sight, he saw that Lillian had left the Hall.

"You know what, Potter, you really are a self-centered jerk." Alice scoffed in disgust, dumping her juice atop his matted head.

"Asshole." Mekia sneered, mimicking her friends' acts and she and Alice left the Great Hall.

"Well, at least you know she's not gay, bisexual, or both." Remus chuckled behind James's back.

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'I cannot believe he actually thought that!' Lillian thought in disbelief, walking to her dorm after a long day. Between classes, James had been trying to apologize to her again and again, and with every apology he attempted angered her more. She finally snapped on him in one of her classrooms. 'I bet he wishes it were a girl. That son-of-a—' Her thoughts were abruptly interrupted when she was pulled into a dark classroom with a hand clamped over her mouth.

"Shh…I won't hurt you." A male voice whispered in her ear. Lillian started to relax as her captor felt a small smile form on his palm. "Still mad at me?" How could she be, especially when he kissed her like he did?

"Yes…" She answered "Very mad."

"Then show me just how mad." He released her mouth and recaptured it with his own, letting his tongue explore her depths. (A/N: The door's closed, and there's a Silence Charm on it.)

Lillian pulled away from his embrace and turned to face him. "How about this?" She pushed him against the wall and kissed him back furiously. The young lovers lost track of time, and nothing seemed to matter but their infinite world of pleasure.

Lillian definitely didn't mind him slipping his hands up her shirt and unhooking her bra, or cupping her breasts. And the captor didn't mind her leaving little kiss marks on him, or softly moaning his name. Neither of them cared that they were half naked in a classroom, or that they were melded against each other so passionately.

"Now are you still mad?" He asked.

"Yes…just full of angry."

"Oh…" He kissed her neck. "Then here's my apology." He switched their positions, so that she was against the wall now, and let his hands wander up her skirt…

(A/N: Sorry, kiddies, but that's all the nasty for this chapter—use your imagination! P.S.: They didn't shrug; it was just a very good make-up session.)

Getting dressed, she turned to him and asked sarcastically, "Next time, do you think you could leave my clothes on?"

He gave her a wicked smirk and replied, "You sure weren't complaining a minute ago." She blushed, tugging on her robe. "Oh, is little Lily blushing?"

"No, her girlfriend is." She snapped.

Sighing, he asked, "Were you really mad at me?"

"Yes, Sirius Black, I was. But…after that little apology," she winked, "I suppose I forgive you."

"Well, since you forgave me, go give your girlfriend a kiss to make her stop blushing." Before Lillian could form a retort, Sirius pushed her out the door with a pat on her butt and swiftly closed the door behind her.

Lillian stumbled and fell into someone's arms. "Sorry…" She mumbled, looking up. "Severus?"

"It's okay." He smiled lightly. "Are you alright, though?" A voice interrupted her response.

"Snivellus, what the hell are you doing with my girl?"