Mistakes Were Made
Coach/Tami/Julie/Smash/Matt, post-Season Two, PG13, 753 words, Title from Brothers & Sisters
"Mistakes were made"
President Ronald Reagan said those words twenty years ago in a time when admitting a mistake was perceived as a sign of strength.
I made a mistake.
Coach sits on his chair and rocks back and forth as Gracie sleeps on his chest. It's late, he can't sleep. But Gracie Belle is out like a light. Coach looks up at the clock. 12 am on the dot.
"Happy Birthday baby girl."
He lightly kisses her on her head. What a year this has been. From being at and then leaving TMU, to the growing problems with Julie and Shelley, to dealing with his players when they were at their absolute worst, it was a lot for him to handle. And while he always, ALWAYS tried to do the right thing, fix the problems they were created, he feels like he didn't do a good enough job. Should have known to see most of it coming too. Should have been prepared. Sometimes he thinks he might have made those problems worse by getting involved. Sometimes he thinks it's better to just mind your own damn business.
And now, sitting here with Gracie, all those problems are going to start all over again. And now that Julie is getting ready for college, it's only going to get worse. He's ready for it now. Knows it's all going to come for him head on.
He'll admit he made mistakes. And that he'll try his hardest not to make the same mistake twice.
--
Tami hangs up the phone with the new newspaper advisor and English teacher for the new school year. The woman who's taking Mr. Barnett's place, after he packed up and the end of last school year and took off. She doesn't know where's he going or what he's doing. She doesn't even want to either. It's all her fault too, that he's gone. Just one of the many mistakes she's made this past year.
Maybe its good all these bad things happened, she thinks. Because now she knows better. Knows when to say no and stick to it, knows when it's a good idea to really think about something before she does it, and knows that her daughter is growing up and won't be the perfect child anymore.
She'll admit she made mistakes. And she'll cross her fingers and pray it doesn't happen again.
--
Julie lies in bed and stares at the wall. She feels Matt arms wrap around her naked body and she smiles. Her stares at the wall with her.
"What are you thinking about?" he says.
Where to even start, she tells herself. It was just this time last year she was hanging with Swedish guys, leaving her boyfriend to wonder whether the love of his life was cheating on her. That was a mistake. Or all the times she got into a fight with her mother for no reason. That was a mistake too. The list in Julie's head in never ending. She's made mistakes every single day. And had to pay for them every single day. Problem is, she never knew what she was doing was wrong until it was too late.
"I made a mistake. I – I made a mistake." She says.
He breathes into her hair. He knows that feeling. Knows he's made his own fair share of mistakes in the past.
"We all make mistakes. You just gotta learn from them and move on. Start fresh." He kisses the top of her head.
"Start fresh. That sounds good."
They've both made mistakes, and are now starting fresh at the exact same place. They wouldn't have it any other way.
--
Smash sits in the locker room and gets his mind under control. He's so nervous he wants to puke. Doesn't even understand why. This is Whitmore, not TMU. And he knows it would be TMU if he wasn't such an idiot. He's admitted he made a mistake. He's admitted a lot of things this past year. And never in his wildest dreams did he imagine he'd be here, getting ready for his first college football game.
He thinks its good, being here at Whitmore. That he'll be able to put all his effort into the things that are important to him. And not spend time looking for ways his entire future can once again become ruined.
He's learned from his mistakes and has come out a better man. He thanks God for getting the chance to do that every single day.