It's rated M for a reason . Beware.
Chapter 6
Robin woke up feeling very tired. It was more than simple morning drowsiness. It was an exhaustion that wrapped him in a lead blanket, weighing his whole body down. It was foreboding, as if his body was trying to tell him something. It was very unusual. Never the less, he pulled himself out of bed, bathed and dressed as usual.
As he left his room to go to breakfast, he felt something tugging at his mind, pecking away at it. He knew that this (including his difficulty in waking up) meant that he was forgetting something important. It rarely happened that he forgot things of importance. What could it be? Was it personal? Did it have to do with the team? Did he forget Bruce's birthday? Hat he notremembered to refuel the R-cycle? Trying to remember was beginning to give him a headache, but he knew if he didn't remember whatever was bugging him, he'd be sorry later. He searched out Raven to calm his nerves.
A while back, a horrible trick of Slade had nearly killed him. One year prior to the incident, Slade sent small microbes into Robin's blood stream. After a year they triggered some severe relapses and delusions in Robin's mind and allowed Slade to corrupt his mind into believing he was actually being attacked when he wasn't. It was Raven who sought out his mind and brought him back to the real world. In order to see his delusions, Raven melded her mind to his for several moments. It was a strange and frightening procedure for the both of them; Robin didn't know what to expect when the great force of her spirit entered his mind, and Raven (who had trained herself to live without emotion) was forced to relive the painful memories of the Boy Wonder's past; he wished she hadn't had to see those things, but there was nothing he could do to change that.
In the middle of the process, Slade's manifestation attacked, knocking Raven back into her own body and out of Robin's mind. This caught Raven off guard and didn't give her enough time to fully withdraw form him. A part of her stayed in his mind and a part of his went with her. From that day forth, the two had a special connection; one of understanding and acceptance.
Because of the connection, they were also able to reach out to each other through a mental link, lightly nudging the other's consciousness, giving a slight indication of where the other was and what the other was feeling. This morning he could feel she was in the living room. As usual, he didn't sense her emotions.
(RRRR)
That morning Raven woke with a sense of dread. She almost didn't acknowledge it, as was her usual protocol, but beneath it she could sense premonition. It then hit her: today was the day. Oh, what a miserable day it would be. There was no way to hide from it, either. In that way, today was somewhat as her birthday had been. She had tried to hide form it, but locking herself in her room hadn't stopped it from coming. That had been a terrible day. It was the day Slade returned and had forced her to accept her fate. She was forced to accept that the end of the world would come through her, which, she supposed, was worse than today, except three years ago the Teen Titans' world had ended; it ended with the loss of Starfire.
Three years ago today, Starfire went through a dimension bending portal in pursuit of the criminal known as Warp. She never returned. To say the Titans were devastated did not even begin to explain their pain. The original intent of the Teen Titans was to create a team of young people committed to fighting evil and injustice. What was created though, was a family whose members were committed to each other as much as they were to their job. Each of them began to fall apart over the course of the months following her disappearance, each in their own and mostly private way. Believing they had to be strong for each other, they internalized all of their suffering, all except Raven, who truly had no control of her occasional emotional outbursts and subsequent property damage.
Raven and Starfire had a bond that was unique and quite subtle, and they liked it that way. It rose out of being the only girls on the team. In general, there were fewer female super heroes in the world, and even fewer who were active heroes at so youngan age. They really only had each other for feminine company. Their relationship was especially strong due to the fact that female companionship their own age had been denied to each of them throughout their childhoods. For Raven, intimacy came slowly. It took her a long time to warm up to Starfire. This was because she had led a life that left her isolated and cut off from all people, let alone children her own age. Even her mother hardly ever saw her due to severe postpartum depression as a result of the rape that had resulted in Raven's birth. Starfire took to this sisterly bond more easily. Since she had grown up as royalty, she had been very sheltered, left only to play with her sister who, to date, had tried to kill Starfire on two separate occasions. The alien girl was quick to align herself with true sororital companionship.
After finding a true friend, four at that, to have one of them taken away destroyed Raven. The first outburst came about a week and a half after Starfire's disappearance. It appeared to Beast Boy and Cyborg that her powers went into overload without warning, but she felt it coming almost a minute before it consumed her. She had called to Robin through their mental link for help, though she knew there was nothing that he'd be able to do. The last thing that she saw before passing out was him bursting through the door. Here "emotional flip-out," as Beast Boy tactlessly called it, left the tower without power for two days and it left her in a coma for a week.
Robin had cared for her during that week, never leaving her side, watching over her like a hawk. Part of this had to do with the guilt he felt in loosing Starfire. He told her that hewould not let another one of his friends to be taken form him. With their psychic link, he had helped Cyborg to monitor her condition more accurately. He was also able to speak to Raven in this way. It was the first time Raven had ever allowed anyone inside her mind willingly, but she trusted he wouldn't harm her and she would have done anything to escape the awesome loneliness that enveloped her with the coma.
Raven was the first to wake that morning, as usual. She headed downstairs for some breakfast. Next came Cyborg. He entered the large room, which only seemed to get larger by from the feeling of emptiness he brought with him. They acknowledged each other in a silent and sympathetic gaze. The two shared a meal with little talk until Beast Boy, who lightened the mood a bit, joined them.
"Where's Robin?" he asked. "I'm usually the last slouch to get out of bed."
"You're right B," responded Cyborg. "He's normally awake way before now, especially with today being…" Hetrailed off, notknowing what to say.
Raven finished his thought. "Three years."
"Yeah," he said, upset that she had actually said it out loud.
It was then that Robin came through the doors entering the living space. The three other teenagers grew completely still.
"Good morning guys," said Robin, as cheerful as ever. The others looked at him confusedly.
"Uh, good morning to you, too," greeted Cyborg, giving him an odd look.
Raven found his behavior to be shocking, but if this was how he was choosing to deal with his grief, so be it. While she didn't think this was the healthiest way to act, she'd seen him act far worse in the past. Robin poured himself some cereal and began to eat it. The others tried to do the same, doing their best to appear as though nothing was wrong and feeling very uncomfortable doing so. Robin, of course, picked up on this.
"Is there something going on with you guys?"
Raven's eyes popped open. He really didn't remember what today was. She didn't know if that was a good or bad thing, but she felt he someone should tell him.
"Uhh," she began, but was cut off by Cyborg.
"Naw man. Nothing's wrong, just a case ofmorning moodiness."
Raven stared at Cyborg with more shock than she had regarded Robin. She didn't think keeping him in the dark was what they should be doing and she was upset with Cyborg for thinking it was okay to let him keep thinking nothing was wrong. She gave Cyborg a look that conveyed as much. He appeared to show no regret or remorse in the blatant lie he'd told to one of his Robin. Suddenly she wasn't so hungry and she threw her spoon down into her oatmeal. This made everyone stop eating and stare at her. She and Cyborg held a staring match for a few moments. Just then, the alert signal went off. Never before had Raven been so happy that a crime had been committed.
"Titans, GO!" shouted their leader. They sped to the heart of Jump City where their sensors indicated the crime taking place.
They returned tired and (for the most part) hungry, having not finished their breakfast. It was nearly four in the afternoon when they got back to the tower. Having defeated another gang of criminals, they also felt satisfied and a little less depressed over the anniversary of the day. Raven was still not speaking to Cyborg for what he had done, or rather what he had not done.
After such days of crime fighting, each of the Titans would retreat to his or her respective room to recuperate, refocus and reflect. The three R's as Robin called it. Beast Boy thought it was dumb and that he only did it because he had a bias toward the letter R. Robin of course always denied this with a smug grin.
"I don't know about you guys," drawled Beast Boy as the four headed to their rooms, "But I'm napping until dinner. Who's turn is it to cook?"
"Mine," responded Raven.
"Oh," began Robin, "I guess that means we'll be ordering ow…"
He didn't finish his joke. The other three Titans stopped and looked back at him when they realized he's stopped walking.
"Robin…?" Cyborg began, but stopped when he saw where Robin's eyes were fixated.
Starfire's door.
Oh no, thought Raven with dread.
"What day is it," he said. His tone wasn't questioning. He already knew the answer.
"Man, we were going to tell you…" Robin stormed away to his room before Cyborg could finish his sentence. From the end of the hall, the sound of his door mechanically slamming shut could be heard. It was followed by the sound of several mechanized locks sliding into place. His room, by most standards, was now a vault.
A vault of suffering, thought Raven, gravely.
She lashed out at Cyborg.
"Why didn't you tell him before!"
"You know why I didn't tell him; because I didn't want this to happen."
"It was inevitable. Now, because of you, it's going to be ten times worse!"
"This is in no way my fault! You could have told him, too."
"I was giving you a chance to make it right!"
The light bulb above them shattered.
"Hey!" said Beast Boy. "We all need to cool it. It's over, okay? We'll deal with Robin - together -later. Right now, we all need to chill and get some rest."
Without another word, the three went to their rooms.
In his room, Cyborg went over code incriptions with the hope of someday being able to enter Robin's room. Beast Boy had thought for a moment that he could turn into a small insect and crawl into their leader's room through the air duct, but quickly fell into a deep sleep, a string of drool dripping from his mouth. Locks however, were not a problem for Raven.
Raven teleported into Robin's room. Cyborg and Beast Boy didn't know, but she often did this when he was distraught. They would have long conversations where he would spill out his worries to her and she would offer her best council. Other times they just sat in silence. Other times still she would sit quietly while he took out his rage on any number of punching bags and training dummies. Today she found his room empty and his window open. He was on the roof.
Out the window she flew, rising up then soundlessly landed on the roof. He was perched on the opposite end staring at Jump City, squatting, his shoulders hunched. On his face there was a scowl she'd seen on the face of the Batman; Robin often tried to replicate it. He had never executed it as well as he did now. She walked up behind him and stayed still and quiet, waiting for him to respond. Behind them, the sun was setting. The sky, covered in wispy clouds, looked like it was on fire. The city looked like a smoldering coal in the flaming dusk. They were silent for a very long time before the Boy Wonder spoke.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
Though he stayed still, his voice was teaming with anger that was barely contained. When she didn't respond his hands balled into fists. His anger became less contained. "Why didn't you tell me?" Raven took a deep breath to answer but found the words wouldn't come. He turned his glare on her, actually making her flinch. At this, he unclenched his fists, let go of a bit of his rage. "I might have expected this from Beast Boy and Cyborg," he said more quietly, "But from you?"
"I wanted to tell you."
"Then why didn't you?"
She sighed. "I knew it was wrong when Cyborg stopped me from telling you, but then I thought he might be right."
Robin gazed at her with a shocked expression.
"I realized that today didn't have to be so horrible for you. This morning you seemed... happy. I just wanted for you to stay that way. Things haven't appeared to get any better for you as the years pass and..."
"We lost her, Raven! Do you expect me to just forget about her?"
"Of course not. None of us can ever forget about her. She was our friend. But she would want us to live our lives, not spend them mourning... on the roof..."
He looked as if he might say something profound or punch her in the face; he was equally capable of both. Instead, he simply sighed and turned around to face the city again He hung his head.
"You're right," he said, defeat in his voice.
She couldn't believe what she was hearing. "What?"
"You're right. She wouldn't want me acting like this, sulking up here. My behavior is messing up the team. It's time for me to let go. It's just hard;it's not like we ever had a body tobury." He turned back to the city.
"I know." She floated up to stand beside him, also gazing at the city. Their capes hid it, but when a gust of wind swept up the blue and black material one could see that they were holding hands, the underside of their elbows touching, their fingers intertwined.
"Tell me what to do, Raven," he whispered.
"You're our leader; you should be telling us what to do."
"Seriously, I need your help."
"You know what to do. The answer's inside you."
"So are you," he joked, "Most of the time."
She smirked. "I can get in your mind -sometimes-, not your heart, and that's where the answer to your question is."
He squeezed her hand a little tighter. "You're always in my heart."
Had this exchange occurred between any other boy and girl, these words might have brought about a moment of awkwardness or romance, but not with these two. There was an ease with which the words were said and an ease with which they were received. He had meant nothing more than what he said and she had taken it as such.
"Sit," she said after a moment. "Meditate with me."
They sat across from each other on the ledge and chanted. "Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos." Together, their minds were transported to a far away space of nothing where they floated in an abyss of calm and clarity. When they returned, the sky had grown dark and stars covered the sky. They strayed staring at the stars with only the sound of the surf. About a half an hour passed before the other Titans joined them. Together the four of them stared at the stars, concentrating extra long on one that was slightly green in its color. This they knew to be Starfire's home planet. Gazing at it helped them to feel a little more connected to her. The surf remained the only sound. After some time, Cyborg spoke.
"I'm sorry, Robin."
Robin didn't turn his head from the sky.
"Me too," added Beast Boy.
"We all are," said Raven.
"It's okay," Robin said, a sense of finality. "I'm okay."
With that, they all went inside.
They ordered in dinner and decided to do something to get their minds off of the sad occasion. They voted on watching a movie on t.v. When the movie ended they were all still a little uneasy about going to their rooms and spending the rest of the night alone with their thoughts on Starfire, so they split into teams and played pool. On one team were Raven and Cyborg while Robin and Beast Boy made up the other.
"Just to let you know, we're kicking your butts," said Beast Boy.
"In you're dreams, Grass Stain," Cyborg fired back.
"Grass Stain! Back me up here, Robin."
In a voice like velvet and with a grin just as smooth he said, "It's okay B. We don't need to say a word. We're going to win and that's all that matters."
"C'mon Cyborg," said Raven, "Let's wipe those grins off their faces."
By midnight they had finished their game and Raven and Cyborg had won.
"This is bogus!" shouted Beast Boy.
"Rematch," demanded Robin.
"Sorry guys," said Cyborg, "But I need to recharge for tomorrow."
"I'm pretty tired too," said Beast Boy.
Raven made her way over to the kitchen. "I'm making some tea before I go to sleep. Anyone want some?"
Cyborg and Beast Boy disappeared out the door with a, "No thanks," and a, "None for me, Raven."
"How about you, Raven?" she heard Robin ask. "You up for a rematch?"
She placed the kettle on the stove then turned around and faced him. "Are you that eager to get beaten again?"
"I'll take that as a yes." He began to set up the balls on the felt surface of the pool table.
Raven walked over to the table, her arms crossed over her chest, one eyebrow raised. "You know, you have some serious issues with competition."
"It's part of my charm." He handed her a cue. "Care to break?"
Without a word, she leaned over and struck the cue ball and began the game.
"You are so cheating," complained Robin about seven minutes into the game, when it became clear that she was playing much better than he was.
"You are unbelievable," she said, standing back for him to take his shot.
It was a scratch.
"You made that happen."
"Why would I waste my powers on a pool game against you when I don't even need them to beat you?" She smirked at the end, satisfied with his annoyance.
"You're doing something..."
"Yeah," she replied. She bent over to take her shot. She struck the cue ball hard, rocketing a ball into the corner pocket where Robin's crotch was. He jumped back. "Whipping your butt."
It was then that she noticed how sexual the entire game of pool was; long sticks, balls, lots of bending over. She sensed that this thought had also just struck his mind.
"Excuse me?" he asked, amused by her change in character. "I thought I was the competitive one."
"It must be rubbing off."
He brushed against her as he took his place to strike the ball. "I"m rubbing off on you, ay?"
She almost laughed at his antics. "Just take your shot."
They played for a littlewhile, talking about whatever, until the tea kettle Raven had put on the stove began to whistle. Quickly she flew over to the kettle, not wanting the noise to wake Cyborg and Beast Boy in case they had already settled down for the night.
"You want any?" she asked as she poured herself a mug. When she looked at him, she saw that he had been staring at her with a sad look on his face. "Robin?"
(RRRR)
Robin used the moment Raven flew to attend to her tea to observe the pool table. She clearly had better skill than he did, so he knew he'd have to compensate with strategy. He was debating on whether it would serve him better to make a clear shot he had or obstruct her next one, when out of the corner of his eye he noticed something. What the something was, he couldn't put his finger on at first. Then it hit him; Raven. There was something not right about her. It agitated him that he couldn't figure out what it was. As with all mysteries he tried to solve, he started from the most superficial level; her physical appearance. He sorted throughevery image he could find of her in his head. He he went through his memory, year by year, comparing the person in front of him to the image in his mind.
Hair color was a match. Hair length was a match. Complexion was a match. Eye color was a match. Costume was a match. Costume color was a match. Height was a match. Silhouette was... WRONG! This did not match up with past data. Over the past three years in the comparison of images there had been aslight and gradual increase in the size of her bust and hips. It made her midsection look narrower and filled out her costume a bit differently than it had in the past. It then hit him. Three years. It had been three years since he lost quite a bit of perspective and stopped paying such close attention to the people closest to him. He hadn't noticed when she grew up. They had all grown up. Where had he been? Mourning, as Raven had put it. While he was doing that, what else had slipped pass him? Had his mental absence contributed to the strange rhythm the team had taken on? With the loss of Starfire, the team had also lost their innocence, but there were other things Robin hadn't been wanting to think about that had been taken from the Teen Titans: time. He gazed intensely at Raven. Soon she wouldn't even be a "teen". What sort of team would the Titans be? He felt like Peter Pan finally realizing his Wendy Bird was a woman with a husband and kids.
With these tights, I probably look like him, too, he thought.
"Robin?" he heard her say.
Right then he didn't really trust anything he knew. He knew that he was Robin and she was Raven, but aside from that, he couldn't be sure.
"How old are you?" he asked.
She looked at him quizzically.
"I'm eighteen. You know that."
Did I? he thought. "And how old am I?" His voice sounded tired.
"You're nineteen." She came toward him looking worried.
"Cyborg's twenty. You know that?"
"Yes, I did." She now stood in front of him. "What's wrong?"
"Maybe we should be the Titans Who Used To Be Teens." He laughed, feeling slightly dazed.
"I think you should go to bed."
"But we haven't finished our game," he protested.
In an instant, a black haze of energy covered the pool table, sending all the balls into different pockets. "Yes we have," she said in a severe tone and walking toward the elevator.
"I knew you were using your powers to win." He grinned and followed her.
"Get in," she said in a very unamused tone and pointing to the elevator.
Lazily, he strolled in, leaning against the back door of the lift. He let the doors shut before speaking. "I know I'm a jerk sometimes. I'm sorry. It must be hard for you, being the only girl around here. That's hard enough, but you also have to put up with the three of us."
She replied in her dead pan humor. "Sometimes I want to slit my wrists, but I manage okay."
"Do you?" he asked, sencerly.
"Slit my wrists?"
"Manage."
"Yeah." She let some silence sit in the air for a moment. "You didn't answer me before. What's wrong?"
He sighed. "Raven, I don't need to burden you with my problems," he said, stepping off the lift and headed toward his room.
"So you admit that you have problems?"
He looked at her and smiled, keying in the code to his room, but not answering her. He entered and she followed him in. "What?" he asked, genuinely curious as to why she was in his room.
"I want to be sure you go to bed."
"You're so sure I wasn't going to?"
He in fact wasn't, but wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing that. He was actually planning on reviewing some files on some of the various miscreants of Jump City.
Because of their link, she usually had an idea of what he was thinking. Though he could do the same to her, it bothered him to no end that she was able to literally get into his mind. He had been very aware when she did it to save him from Slade, but he wondered from time to time if she could slip into his mind without him ever knowing. Grabbing his pajama bottoms, he started to take off his uniform. Without being told, she turned around to allow him to change. "I'm done," he said when he was dressed. In fact it was only half true, since he hadn't put his shirt on.
She turned around and lifted one eyebrow. "I think you confused your shirt with your mask," she quipped wryly.
"What?" he asked, dramatically flexing his muscles and striking a pose. "You don't approve?"
She completely ignored his antics. "You can't always be Robin."
He tensed at this. She thinks I should quit? "What do you mean by that?"
"Have you forgotten about a certain guy named Dick Grayson?"
Oh, that's what she meant, he thought as he hung his uniform in the closet.
"He exists," she continued. "I'm sure he likes to come out for a breath of fresh air every now and then."
"I tend to forget about him," he said. "I do my best to give him as little stage time as possible."
"So that's what you've been doing all this time? Acting?" she asked, walking over to the window. He had left it open since earlier in the afternoon when he went up to the roof. She shut it and drew the blinds.
"'All the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players.'"
"And what about the man in front of me?" she asked, slightly sitting on the window sill, her arms crossed. "Be straight with me, for once this evening."
He hesitated. "Dick is too weak to be a Teen Titan. He can't cut it in this tower. He can't cut it as your leader."
"I think there's room for the two of you."
"Do you know how jealous I am of you guys sometimes?" He could tell this had shocked her. "I wish I didn't have to deal with this whole alter ego bullshit." His tone grew increasingly hostile. "When you wake up in the morning, you're you. And when you go to bed, you're you. When you're in public, you're the same you that you are in private. I put on a mask everyday to become the one everybody sees."
"Maybe I don't want to be me when I wake up in the morning," she retorted rather harshly. That had surprised him. He stepped a bit closer to her. "I'd give anything to have what you have; a way out if I wanted. A little vacation or escape from what it is I see when I look into the mirror..." He saw the black glow starting to rise around her. Placing his hands on her shoulders, he calmed her and the glow faded away.
"It's not a way out. It's a sick, mocking, false hope. Someone as powerful as you doesn't want this. Dick isn't special. Dick isn't strong. Dick can't lead you."
"You know what I think of him?"
"What?"
"I'll only tell Dick Grayson."
He sighed. Reaching behind his head, he untied the piece of black and held it in his hand. He always felt a little naked without his mask on. He had actually never shown any of the Titans his whole face until two years ago, and it had been by accident, but still rarely let them see him without it. He figured it was a silly fear, so he took this opportunity to try and stomp it.
She gazed into his eyes, a concentrating expression on her face.
"I think you're brave and smart... and you try your hardest to do what's right... and you're loved by your friends and..." Her face grew sad.
"... There's something you're afraid of."
Slowly her hands rose to touch his temples. He suddenly realized what she was going to do. "Hey," he said forcefully, grabbing her wrists.
"Sorry," she said, also realizing that she had not asked permission to enter his mind. "I didn't mean to..."
"I hate that you can do that!" he said, exasperated. He threw away her wrists. "That you can get in here." He pointed both his index fingers to his head. "I can't do that with you. Sometimes I want to be able to get in there." With his final comment, he palmed the top of her head.
She smirked, attempting to lighten the mood. "I'm sure you would."
Just then, he was struck by the urge to kiss her. It was strange to him because he, (like most teenage boys), usually had to plan ahead and orchestrate things quite a bit if there was ever a girl he wanted to kiss. Maybe it was the way the single dim desk lamp cast a strange glow on her cheek, or the silky feel of her hair beneath his palm, but mostly the idea came to him from out of nowhere. Sliding his hand to the back of her head, he brought her head toward his and pressed his lips against her own. It was slow but firm. He was a bit surprised when she didn't flinch and even more surprised when nothing in his room exploded. It was strange to him how the entire sensation felt so normal in spite of the fact that he knew it to be quite absurd. There was also the fact (though he couldn't tell at first since it had been so slight) that she had begun to respond.
He pulled away, but kept his hand on the back of her head. He looked at her curiously to gage her reaction. A question he couldn't read was written on her face. He sensed that she was clam. He hadn't upset her. Reflecting these things and how the kiss had felt, a quiet "Hm," in observation came from him like a short hum. He then pulled her head back for a second kiss. This time she definitely responded. Her lips parted, allowing his tung into her mouth, and her hands spread themselves flat against his stomach. This cued him to be bolder.
He allowed his hands to wander over the expanse of her back and hips, pulling her tightly to his body. Their kiss deepened and out of nowhere he heard himself moan. Half stumbling, half tumbling, they brought themselves to his bed.
(RRRR)
Robin didn't know it, but far below them, in one of the sub-basements of the Titan's tower, screws to their main pipelines were loosening. Wires were coming undone. Locks and security codes were overriding. While it appeared that Raven's powers were unaffected by his contact, this was not the case at all. Slowly, her magic worked its way from the bottom most floor of the tower, rising higher and higher.
He had caught her off guard. Never in a million years could she have foreseen what was taking place at that moment. More surprising than his kiss was the fact that she found herself responding, giving in, deepening the kiss. As the moments lagged on, she realized she wanted him very much. She wanted him more than she had wanted Malchior. She wanted him more than she didn't want the demon blood running through her veins. She wanted him more than she had ever wanted anything before.
Raven knew that were any of the destructive effects of their actions made visible to him, he would stop immediately ending the glorious pleasure; ending the single time she had ever felt whole. Though she knew it was causing severe damage to the tower, she strained herself to suppress it, making the damage small and subtle until she couldn't suppress it any longer. She felt selfish for not caring. In fact, she didn't care if the whole building toppled down on top of them, so long as she could stay in this passionate embrace. She was willing to end all things for his lips and his touch, and that fact scared her.
So, when he kissed her, some screws loosened. When she bit his chin, furniture was flipped over. When he unzipped her leotard, several months of decoded encryptions were re scrambled. When their bare chests pressed together, the tires of the T-car exploded. When he entered her, there was a rock avelanch along the cliffs of the Titan's island. When his heated breath moaned her name, small spider web cracks made their way through the glass windows covering the many facades of the tower.
She writhed beneath him, on top of him, beside him, all the while wishing there were some way for him to be deeper inside of her. By his sweat covered body and his restless physicality, she guessed he wanted the same thing. When he came to an angle and position that seemed to satisfy him, he became very forceful and focused in his thrusting. He pounded into a spot Raven didn't know existed inside of her.
Lifting her head a bit, she could see his slick member sliding in and out of her. She was rendered dumb by the sight of it. The sound of their flesh smacking together was enough to separate her from the world around her. All she could concentrate on was the growing orgasmic pressure building up and the sound and feeling being created by his thick flesh. These things which she could barely imagine being contained within a single universe were all taking place between her legs. She was sure she would explode. She tried to focus on something real and plausible, like his lips against her own. But soon, the feeling became too much. He tilted her chin up to look him in the eye. His eyes, filled with raw, animal, masculine desire, were her undoing. They were a man's eyes, and looking back at them were the eyes of a woman. She saw that between them there had occurred a complete and ritualistic loss of innocence. She was not a virgin, but this was the first time she'd made love. It was then she knew that their act was the final nail in the Teen Titans' coffin.
As the dam inside of her burst, she vaguely registered that the tower's main pipe line had also burst. The lamp in his room then lost it's light when the bulb inside of it exploded. This was the only indication of the berserk effects of their actions that he could have seen, but she was fairly certain he didn't notice. The basements would be flooded by midmorning, but all she could think or feel, much as he, was his own release, which came moments later.
He stayed inside of her, hugging and holding her tightly, like a human blanket. She held onto him with equal determination. His sweat mixed with her own and dried, actually sticking them together. His breathing was deep and relaxed. She saw a ghost of a smile graced his features as she squeezed the muscles above his shoulder blades. She sensed the stiffness he feltthere from the work his hips and back had done. She was surprised that the start of a smile was also finding its way to her own face.
She shuddered, her body humming, when he finally pulled out of her and peeled their sticky bodies apart. He rolled to his side and wrapped one of his legs and both of his arms around her, pulling her tight against his body. Their foreheads rested against each other as their heaving lungs began to calm. Acting on what felt most natural, Raven cupped his face and kissed him. Gently he kissed back, letting her take the lead, and she did, ending it soon and going back to resting her forehead against his.
Once she had calmed down enough, she realized that he was shivering. Is he okay? She wondered, concerned. "Dick," she whispered, their heads still touching, "Are you cold?"
"No," he responded, quietly but rather defensively.
"You're shivering."
"No I'm not." He said this with the conviction of a four-year-old, though he wasn't joking.
She almost laughed. "Yes you are."
"I'm just... happy." The last thing he said sounded more defensive than the first. This made her want to kiss the life out of him, or at least try to, and she did, rolling him onto his back without any protest from him. After their kisses ended, however, he rolled her back to laying on her side, their foreheads touching, tightening his grip when their noses sometimes touched.
His attitude and stubbornness could be quite endearing in the right situation. It was a moment that made her heart swell and break at the same time. She knew that she wanted him and would want him again and again, and that she might even possess what could be called 'love' for him. She knew she wanted many more moments and mornings like this, and that (as said before) she was willing to end all things for it, even the Teen Titans. She knew that her desires were wrong and destructive, and she hated herself for wanting him this much. She knew that the only way for them to be together (in a way that would cause no physical harm to anyone or anything) was for her to be able to express emotions in spite of the fact that her powers were controlled by them. She also knew that to do this was to do something that had never before been successfully done by any half demon. It would involve several long, grueling trials and it would require her leaving him for an unknown period of time.
By now he had fallen asleep and his grip on her had loosened substantially. This, she decided, would be the best time to leave. It killed her that she would not be able totell him anything. But she knew if she did, he would follow her, and that would ruin any chance of her success.
Her mind was made up. With a deep breath she said a silent good-bye to him, wishing that she was capable of crying. Silently, she teleported herself and her clothes away. She didn't know it would be four years until she saw him again.
(RRRR)
A feeling of unease swept over him when he woke. It wasn't very apparent at first because the residual effects of the night before were still with him. His skin was still tingling and his back was still stiff. It was wonderful. Raven was not with him, but he hadn't expected her to stay, even though a secret a part of him had hoped she would. This is not what unsettled him, though. He would have ignored it, had ignoring his unease cost him greatly the day before.
To ease his growing anxiety, he stretched out his mind to search for Raven's presence, much as he'd done the morning before.
That's odd, he thought, not finding her.
Still feeling unsettled, he went downstairs to greet the other Titans and eat his breakfast. He found a frantic Beast Boy and a somber Cyborg. The entire room in front of him was in disarray. "What happened here?" he asked. "And where's Raven?"
Beast Boy and Cyborg glanced at each other before one of them spoke.
"We've been attacked," said Cyborg. "Raven is gone."
Robin didn't stay any longer. Face marked with disbelief, he turned around and ran up toward her room, not wanting to wait for the elevator.He thought he heard Cyborg saying, We think she was taken... but could hear no more as the door to her room came into view.
He pounded on the door.
"Raven!" he screamed. Not waiting for a a response, he keyed in his overriding security code, opening her door.
"Raven!" he called again as he entered the dark room, this time only slightly less loud. It was instantly clear that the room hadn't been occupied for at least a day.
Robin's head spun and he fell to his knees, feeling like he had just been punched in the gut. He could taste the citrus twinge of vomit at the back of his throat but managed to suppress it. Again, he thought. I let it happen again. Before he allowed the overpowering sorrow to take hold, he channeled his energy into a rage he didn't know that he could possess. The only other time he had felt something close to it was when he discovered that what he wanted after his parents' death was vengeance.
No, he said to himself, This is vengeance.
Rather than vomit, an inhuman scream shot out of his lungs. Spider web cracks along the windows that could take no more pressure shattered at the foce of his wail, sending acascade of glass falling around the tower.
(RRRR)
Hmm. Well. Yes. Now we know what happened. Sort of. I'll be updating in a little bit when I have at least three or so more chapters ready.