Tales of Insanity

Chapter 2: Insanity

Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognize here.

A/N: I have the GBA version of ToP. So names and such things might not be correct.

Arche was looking thoughtful as she watch Cless use a holy bottle to ward off monsters. "Would drinking a holy bottle cause me to glow?"

"It probably would…if it didn't kill you first," Klarth answered.

Chester rolled his eyes. "Her own cooking didn't kill her. I doubt a holy bottle would."

"Oh! You would be able to ward off monsters then!" Mint exclaimed.

Chester muttered under his breath, "Arche doesn't need a holy bottle to ward off monsters. Her face can already do that."

Arche glared at Chester. "Really? Then why would monsters still attack us then if my face was so ugly then?"

"Those monsters must be blind."

"Why you! INDIGNATION!"

"Come on out, Undine! Use water gun! Good! Now, return!"

"What the heck is wrong with Klarth?" Chester asked Cless, while watching, amused at Klarth's antics.

"I wish I knew…" answered Cless, worried for Klarth's sanity.

"All those spirits talking in his head must have made him snap…" Chester remarked.

"It could have been all of your arguments with Arche too, you know. That would have made anybody snap if they had to listen to you two bickering." Cless pointed out.

"How do you cope with us then?"

Cless smirked. "I'm borderline insane, that's why."

Klarth was singing…something. "I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was. To catch-"

Cless looked up. "What are you singing, Klarth?"

Klarth looked confused. "…I don't know…"

Silence.

Cless tried again. "What were you doing earlier then?"

"…I don't know…"

More eerie silence.

"So this unicorn will only meet with a pure, innocent maiden?" Cless asked Mint questioningly.

Klarth coughed behind him. "What a rapist…" he muttered.

Chester ran up to Cless and Klarth. "Cless, Cless! I've just received news that basilisks have invaded Olive Village!" he said, panting slightly.

Cless started fuming. "UGH! I'm tired of playing the hero! I already saved the past, the present, and the future! I'm calling in sick now. Next time, if anyone needs saving, go ask Chester!" He stormed off angrily.

Klarth looked bewildered. "…What did we do?"

"…I don't know, but I'm the hero now!" Chester looked as if he could sing. He quickly ran off to tell Arche the good news and tripped over a tree root.

Klarth sighed. "…Well, it was nice meeting him. I'll go prepare his coffin and maybe his epitaph now. Hmm…what color would he want his coffin in?"

[Klarth takes out the Ruby Ring and is getting ready to make a pact with Gnome.

"I beseech you great Earth Spirit. Submit to me, as decreed by the covenant of this ring. My name is Klarth..."

Arche looked amused. "I thought that spirits don't have genders? I also don't think that Gnome is your type and what about poor Mirald? I think Gnome is way too old for you. I would have thought you would have better taste."

Klarth glared at her, but Arche continued rambling. "Also, that has got to be the weirdest declaration of love I have ever heard. I mean 'Submit to me'?" I'll have to say, that's a nice ruby ring though."

A/N: That's another chapter down.