Title: How Do You Do It?
Summary: Takes place two weeks after the last chapter. Sunny tries to get used to how the other autobots are treating him. He thought he would feel better having earned their acceptance, but he doesn't.
Song: Stellar by Incubus (Yeah, I know... deviating from the song name titles lol.)
A/N: Sorry for taking so long updating. I got so many ideas and it's so hard to keep them from merging together... and I'm a lazy ass... what can I say? I think this is the end of this story, but... I guess that all depends on the readers. If you think there should be more let me know! Please review! And please feel free to critique. I thrive on it!
Meet me in outer space
We could spend the night, watch the earth come up
I've grown tired of that place, wont you come with me
We could start again
It had been two weeks since the last battle with the Decepticons, two unbelievably long and anxiety filled weeks for Sunstreaker. So far things had not gone as he had anticipated. Everyone on the Ark was being nice to him, no one seemed to fear him anymore and they even went out of their way to try and chat with him. And to put it bluntly, Sunstreaker was freaking out.
This had been what he wanted, to be seen and not shunned. But, none of it seemed right to him. He hadn't done anything special during that last battle, he'd only done what he had always done. If nothing else shouldn't they fear him more? He used another mech as a shield for Primus sakes. Yeah, it had been Megatron and they still hadn't heard a peep out of the slaghead, but normally something like that would fuel the anti-Sunstreaker fire.
The yellow warrior simply could not understand or figure out the cause for this new view everyone had of him. And that wasn't the worst part. More then a few times he found himself angry and upset because now he was liked for possibly taking Megatron out of action for awhile, not for himself. Not for who he was.
Sunstreaker began to avoid the rest of the autobots when he wasn't on duty, usually heading out to a cliffside not too far from the Ark. He'd even started avoiding Sideswipe if other mechs were about. The red twin had yet to question him about his actions, but he knew sooner or later Sideswipe was going to want an explanation.
He just didn't know what to do. Part of him wanted to soak the attention up and enjoy it. To, for once, feel what it was like to have friends and be accepted. However, he did not know how to, and it all seemed so... hollow to him.
So far no one had stumbled on his hiding spot, he assumed no one else knew about it. At least he hoped so. Sideswipe could probably find him easy enough if he really wanted to, but thankfully his twin knew to let him sort things out on his own for a bit before stepping in. Sunstreaker did not want to worry his twin, especially because Sideswipe seemed so happy that his brother was finally liked.
Soft footsteps alerted the golden twin that he was no longer alone and he cursed as he summoned a weapon form subspace and turned towards the possible threat.
"Oh, Sunstreaker! I am terribly sorry, I had no idea anyone was here." Perceptor babbled as he held up his hands showing he was unarmed and not a threat. "I certainty did not mean to startle you." The scientist eyed the gun in Sunstreaker's hand before the yellow mech let out a sigh and returned it to subspace.
"Sorry, force of habit... I guess." Sunstreaker mumbled, not really sure what else to say.
Perceptor nodded his head as he lowered his hands, "Please, do not be sorry. It was completely understandable."
Sunstreaker nodded again, he wasn't able to find any other words to offer so he simply went back to watching the view from the cliff. The sun was just beginning to set, turning the sky a beautiful mixture of reds, yellows and blues. It made him think of his twin and he nearly forgot that he was not alone anymore.
"It is very pleasant up here," The scientist spoke softly. "I come here sometimes when I need to just... get away as it were. I was not aware that anyone else knew of this spot though."
"I kinda stumbled across it a few days after the last battle." Sunstreaker whispered. "And it is pleasant."
"Ah, so this is where you have been disappearing to recently."
Sunstreaker turned sharply and Perceptor gave him a small smile, "I am not the only one to notice your sudden disappearances'. Your twin in particular has noticed quit a bit."
The yellow twin was starting to feel very uncomfortable, he and Perceptor had never really talked before. "Frag, who am I kidding... I've never really talked to anyone aside from 'Sides before." He thought as he let out another sigh.
"I just... needed to get away." He answered softly, echoing Perceptor's previous words.
The red mech walked closer, his head nodding in acknowledgment. "What exactly is it that you need to get away from, Sunstreaker? I know you and I are not particularly close, but sometimes it does help to have someone to speak to."
"I've got 'Sides."
"Whom you seem to be avoiding. Contrary to popular belief, I am not completely oblivious to things outside of a scientific nature." Perceptor knew he was taking a chance here, he did not want to upset the golden Lamborghini in fear that Sunstreaker would shut himself up.
"Not... avoiding him. Just..."
"Avoiding everyone?" Perceptor supplied. He'd seen how Sunstreaker had been reacting to the sudden change in the way the rest of the Autobots viewed him and knew that, if nothing else, it was a lot for the warrior to try to get his head around so quickly.
Sunstreaker's answer was slight shoulder shrug and a small grunt. This made the scientist a little more comfortable, at least he hadn't been yelled at yet.
"I will not tell you I know how you feel, because I do not think anyone could really know how a person feels. We all feel things differently. If we felt things the same we would not be individuals, we would simply be clones. However, I can say that I understand, to some extent. Change, wether good or bad, can be a challenge to get used to."
Sunstreaker sat quietly for a moment before sighing again, "Yeah... even if the change was something you thought you wanted." He wasn't sure why, but it felt okay to talk to Perceptor like this.
"Well, I am not quite sure I understand, Sunstreaker." The red mech had an idea, but he wanted to try to push the Lamborghini a little. He wanted to get him to talk more and open up, in his mind that was the best way to help the warrior.
Sunstreaker did not speak for a few moments, when he finally did his vocalizer cracked on the first syllable he uttered. He paused and tried again, "I thought I wanted to be accepted... but now that it seems like everyone has it feels wrong... hallow. They haven't accepted me for who I am, just what I did."
Perceptor nodded his head sagely, "Ah, but have you ever stopped to think that perhaps you have not been accepted just yet? Perhaps your actions showed that there was something inside you worth looking at, and maybe the others are trying to really see you?"
The golden twin shook his head, he really hadn't thought of that and now that Perceptor brought it up it did make sense. He hadn't looked at the situation that way.
"And avoiding them will only result in things going back to the way they were, Sunstreaker."
"I... I don't know what to do, or say... I've never been good with that sort of stuff."
Perceptor chuckled for a moment, "You seem to be doing an awfully good job right now."
Sunstreaker looked at the scientist with questioning optics which only caused the red mech to chuckle lightly again.
"You are. Everyone deserves a chance to start again, Sunstreaker. This is your chance, do you not want to make the most of it?"
The yellow twin stood up and did something Perceptor had not expected, he smiled at him before walking to stand in front of him. Slowly a golden hand settled on a red shoulder. "You're right, I should make the most of this."
"Well, you very well can not while you are hiding here."
Sunstreaker smiled again, catching onto what Perceptor meant. He transformed into his alt-mode and began making his way back to the Ark.
"Thanks Percy!" He shouted as his form vanished.
The red mech took the spot Sunstreaker had been occupying and shook his head, "Percy... well, I guess I can live with it."
How do you do it, make me feel like I do
How do you do it, its better than I ever knew
Sunstreaker raced back to the Ark, he'd decided he would put in a real attempt at building relations with the other autobots in the morning. Right now, he had a brother to find and talk to.
Soon he found Sideswipe outside the Ark with a few other bots. It looked like they had just got done seeing one of Wheeljack's new inventions if the scorch marks on the ground were a clear sign. He kept himself hidden, wanting to surprise his twin. Soon the group began to wander back inside, Sideswipe bringing up the rear.
Just before his twin could make it inside, Sunstreaker grabbed him and pulled him against his chest. "Guess who." He whispered as one hand covered his twins optics and the other wrapped around his waist.
"Hmm... Bluestreak?" The red twin asked, his voice full of amusement.
"Wrong! Guess again."
"Could it be... my gorgeous twin, whom I missed so much and can't get enough of?"
Sunstreaker laughed, "You are correct!" He let the hand covering Sideswipe's optics drop down to join the one wrapped around his middle.
Sideswipe took the opportunity to turn around in his twins arms and face him, a smile playing on his face. "You seem happier. Something happen?"
"I had a little talk with Perceptor."
"Oh, this I have to hear!"
Sunstreaker told his twin everything, how he had been feeling, where he had been going and everything that happened with him and Perceptor. Once he was finished he noticed his twin wasn't smiling. Sideswipe had a frown on his face and was looking down at the ground.
"'Sides?"
"Why didn't you tell me?" The red twin asked softly, without looking up.
Sunstreaker pulled him closer, "I'm sorry... you were so happy with how everyone was treating me and I didn't want... I didn't want you to worry or anything."
Meet me in outer space
I will hold you close, If your afraid of heights
I need you to see this place, It might be the only way
That I can show you how, it feels to be inside of you
"But, I did worry, Sunny. I worried a lot." Sideswipe only wanted his twin to be happy, and he thought that Sunstreaker would be a lot happier now that he wouldn't have to hear the horrible things said about him. But now he was realizing that he was the one who was happier, he hated hearing anyone bad mouth his twin, and Sunny had been scared.
"I'm sorry too, Sunshine... I didn't think. I was so happy that I didn't think about how you were handling all this."
Sunstreaker brushed his fingers along the back of Sideswipe's helm, "It's okay, we both kinda messed up. But, it's going to be okay. I realized that, thanks to Percy. All I can do is try to let the others see me for who I am. And if it works things can get better. But, no matter what, I'm always going to have you. You've stuck by me through everything. So, no matter what, I have nothing to lose. Because I've always had the most important thing I have ever needed. You."
Sideswipe stood silent with his mouth hanging open, very much at a lose of words.
"Sunny..."
Suddenly, the red twin activated his jet pack, his arms tightened around Sunstreaker and the shot up into the air. Feeling the ground disappear, Sunstreaker tightened his hold around his brother and fought the urge to scream.
"'Sides, what are you doing?"
Around them the sky danced with the colors of the sunset, though now more blues hues were coming in. But the reds and yellows were still fighting for control of the sky if only for a few minutes longer.
Sideswipe looked at his twin, "I wanted to show how I feel when I'm with you."
The yellow twin thought about this for a moment, initially he had felt a little bit of fear, not knowing what his twin was doing. Then, he felt the thrill and the trust he had in his twin. He knew he was safe and Sideswipe would never let him fall. And the sky and all it's brilliance added so much. Red and yellow colors fighting the darkness of night, together, never giving up till the end.
How do you it, make me feel like I do
How do you do it, its better than I ever knew
How do you do it, make me feel like I do
"I'll always be with you, Sunny. Fighting right beside you, no matter what life throws at us." The red twin whispered against his brother's audio.
"How do you do it, 'Sides?"
"Do what?"
A smile spread across Sunstreaker's face. "Make me feel like I do?"
"I could ask you the same, Sunshine."
Their lips met, and behind them day slipped into night. Tomorrow they would fight, together, like they were always meant to. Battles are not always fought on the battle field, or with guns. And sometimes, those are the hardest battles to fight. But each twin knew that neither would fight alone, ever.