I know you don't have to have a blood test to get married in California, but since they mentioned it in "Arrested Development" I thought I would add it (it also helps my plot). Also I made it so that the doctor wouldn't do the blood work for a marriage license, since this is an alternate universe all legal blood work will be done in the labs downtown in the courthouse (Where Beth and Josh ran into Mick in Arrested Development). Also, I am not a CT scan technician, so if any of this is off, I'm sorry.

There is a reference in here, if you get, it good for you, if not, well…

Again, Josef and Beth are building a friendship, not a romance.

Enjoy!!!

The Doctor's Visit

"What's the doc's name again Blondie?" Josef asked Beth, as they waited in the sterile examination room.

"Dr. Simon Tam." Beth said in an irritated voice.

I can't believe that I agreed to do this. She thought. Sure Mick and Adriana had needed to sleep, but so did she. They had guilted her into accompanying Josef because he was totally inept in dealing with modern, mortal, things, like going to the doctor. And she could be out in daylight with no repercussions. She was supposed to keep Josef in check and make sure he didn't reveal too much about himself, Yeah, right, like I could ever control him….

She had spent the last hour helping Josef fill out the new patient paperwork. Some of it hadn't been too bad…

"Birth date?"

"May 5, 1599." Josef answered smugly.

"That won't work…how about May 5, 1977?"

"What?! Do I look 30 to you! Make it 1980."

"No, I already wrote '77"

"Then make the 7 an 8"

"You want to be born in 1987? That would make you only 20!"

"What? I can't pull off 20?" Seeing Beth's un-amused look, he responded, "I meant, make it '78. At least then I am not 30."

Beth laughed, changed the form and replied, "I've known many women who turned 29 five years in a row. Not many men…"

The hour had tried her patience, but she had been amused. Some of the questions involving sexual history had been…well let's just say more information than she ever cared to know.

If Beth didn't know Josef better she would say that he was apprehensive if not nervous, waiting for the doctor.

When Dr. Tam entered the room he introduced himself and then asked, "So what can I do for you today Mr. Konstan?"

"He needs a general check-up. Heart, temperature, blood-work, the whole thing." Beth hoped she sounded nonchalant.

"Sorry, who are you?" Dr. Tam asked.

"I'm Beth Turner." Beth offered her hand to the doctor, who shook it questionably.

"You're that reporter from Buzzwire. Is this some kind of story? Some exposé on malpractice suits?" Dr. Tam turned defensive.

Beth became flustered, but Josef answered, "No doctor. She is my fiancé and she is here for moral support." Ignoring Beth's shocked expression, he added in an undertone, "See, I really don't like doctors and I haven't had a check-up in quite some time."

"Oh. Sorry." He looked to Beth, but with no apology in his eyes. He continued to watch her closely. "How long has it been since your last check up?" Dr. Tam reached for his stethoscope.

"I honestly can't remember." Josef said smiling.

The check-up went fine, except for Josef's frequent complaints about the doctor's poking and prodding. Beth was disgusted by the time they got to the sexual health questions. Josef answered the doctor's enquires in full detail and Beth—who had heard the full accounts in the waiting room—watched as the doctor became extremely nervous and fidgety.

"Maybe it would be best if your fiancé stepped outside?" Dr. Tam suggested after one of Josef's more colorful descriptions of un-safe sex practices.

"No," Josef replied before Beth could agree with Dr. Tam, "We are totally open with each other. Aren't we honey?" He asked in mock sincerity. All Beth could do was force a smile. She felt that if she opened her mouth she might puke. Josef smiled and turning back to Dr. Tam, he continued, "Beside, all this happened before she was born."

Dr. Tam's eyes grew wide as he looked between Josef and Beth. Beth quickly covered, "He means met. We believe that we were 'born again' when we met each other." It was lame, but Dr. Tam seems to buy it.

He turned back to study his clip board and Beth gave Josef a look that clearly stated, No more mess-ups.

Josef toned down the commentary after that and finally Dr. Tam said, "Well, Mr. Konstan, you seem to be in good health, beside an… adventurous, sex life you have treated your body very well. I am a little worried about this headache you described. I am going to ask that you get a CT scan, just to be sure that your brain is fine."

"His brain? What is wrong with his brain?" Concern filled Beth's question.

"Probably nothing, but it is better to be safe then sorry. There is a lab on the second floor, I will call and let then know you are coming." Dr. Tam got up to leave. But Josef stopped him.

"What about the blood work?"

"We don't do blood work here. You have to go downtown to have blood work done for a marriage license. Congratulations, by the way, hope you are happy together." With that he left the room.

Beth and Josef stared at each other. So, that was less then helpful. Beth thought. "What do we do now?" She asked tentatively.

"How should I know? This was your idea, remember?" Josef replied.

"My idea? My idea?! My idea wasn't to pretend I was your fiancé, or to disturb the doctor with tales of a wild 350 plus years of youthful indiscretions! Thanks to you that doctor thinks we are sex-crazed maniacs!" Beth was breathless by the time she finished ranting.

Josef stood up as if to intimidate her, but drew back when he couldn't vamp out. Shit, I've been doing that so long I forgot how not to.

Beth saw the sadness creep back into his eyes and checked her anger. "We should go have the CT scan done, to make sure your head is fine. Then we can go to the courthouse, fill out the paperwork and have the lab work done."

Josef smiled devilishly, "Awe, honey, I haven't even asked you to marry me yet." He said sarcastically.

Beth smiled and punched him playfully in the arm. "Careful," Josef warned, "I bite."

"No you don't."

"Just because I don't have fangs, doesn't mean I can't. After 400 years, habits become more-or-less permanent." They both laughed as they excited the room.

"Have you even done drugs Mr. Konstan." The CT operator asked him. The operator was probably 50, but he had long hair, tied back in the loose ponytail and was wearing a Hawaiian shirt under his lab coat. He looked like he would fit in better on the beach then a lab-tech room. He was hippie to the core, but every hippie had to grow-up and get a job sometime.

"Well…" Josef looked nervous.

The hippie doctor said, "It's fine. I just need to know how to read the scans, I'm not going to turn you into the police…doctor patient confidentiality and all that."

Josef looked to Beth and then asked, "Could you give me a moment with my fiancé? I need to clear a few things with her before…" Josef trailed off.

"Say no more. It is healthy to have an open relationship, but there is a reason confessionals are closed to the public." The doctor smiled and left to go set up the CT scanner.

Josef turned to Beth urgently. She eyed him suspiciously and asked, "What? You don't have to confess to me. I'm not really your fiancé."

"It's not that. It's just that I don't know." Josef pleaded with her. "What do I say? The '70 were a blur. I need some bases, I don't even know what all the stuff I took was called."

Beth stood there—mouth agape—for a moment. "You mean you did so many drugs you don't remember?"

"No, I remember the days, just not the nights. I am…was a vamp, it really didn't matter, it couldn't kill me and… and it helped take the edge off. 400 years is a long time to be alone." Beth saw what looked like the darkness of depression in Josef's eyes as he confessed.

Beth took a deep sigh and said, "Alright, just tell the doctor that you were into partying in college and your not sure what you took."

"Thanks." Josef tenderly, grabbed her hand.

The doctor, who had been watching through the glass, took that as his cue and came back in. "So, what can you tell me?"

Josef broke his gaze from Beth and said, "Well, to be honest I am not sure. I was a partier in college and got into a whole bunch of stuff. If I was ever told the names, I have forgotten them now."

The hippie smiled, knowingly and responded, "Okay, but nothing recently? That is the most important"

"No." Josef said, "But there is this girl, she is kind of like a drug…"

The hippie's smile widened as he looked between Beth and Josef. It was then that Beth realized Josef was talking about her. Wow! Josef is playing this fiancé part really well. When she looked to Josef she realized that his thoughts were elsewhere and he had not been playing the part, Is he thinking of Adriana? That girl really did a number on him.

Beth walked over to Josef and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips, bringing him back to reality and said, "Thanks, honey, you mean the world to me too."

Josef's surprise was hidden by the hippie starting-up the machinery. "Alright, lets get this done, so that you two love-birds can get out of here."

"I need to talk to you." The doctor said as he entered the waiting room. Beth and Josef looked up, concern written in both their faces.

"What is the matter?" Josef asked as they sat down in the doctor's office.

"Well, your CT scans are not normal. I know they were conducted properly, but well… let me walk you through it." Beth and Josef leaned forward to look at the monitor as the doctor flipped through an array of pictures. "You see how this is brighter then this?" The doctor asked, "And this?" pointing to various areas in the scans. Beth and Josef nodded. "Well, here is a normal CT scan." He pulled up another image side by side with Josef's. "Do you see the difference?"

Beth and Josef just stared at him. Why do doctor's always ask crazy questions like this? Don't they know that if I knew, I would be behind that desk? It must be to prove some kind of point, about how they know more then you. Beth thought.

The doctor continued, "Yours, Mr. Konstan, is lighter." This was quite obvious from the picture.

"And that means…" Josef prompted.

"Your brain is working on overload. You are using more of your brain actively then any scan I have ever seen." The doctor looked like he was going to jump out of his chair with excitement. "You have an amazing memory capacity, and your oratory and factory senses are extremely heightened."

Beth and Josef shared a look of knowing surprise. Vamps were just… special. Then Beth asked, "Are there any other abnormalities?"

The doctor was disappointed by there reaction, but answered, "Well your headaches are most likely from this," The doctor pointed to a darker area in the frontal lobe, "It looks like the typical reaction to methylphenidate."

Seeing Beth and Josef's confused looks he explained, "You take Ritalin don't you? This is one of the common side effects of the drug. I have not heard of many adults who take Ritalin, but you're not a textbook case now are you? No wonder you take Ritalin, the doctor probably mistook your genius for ADD. There are many cases where exceptionally bright people are mistaken for crazy, just because they are different. Your scans are phenomenal, you should really…" The doctor continued babbling about a scientific miracle.

Josef finally cut the doctor off, "If I am fine, I would like to go enjoy the rest of my day."

The doctor looked hurt, but he excused them, saying that there was nothing to worry about. "If you discontinue use of the medication the swelling should go down and the headache will go away in less then a day."

As soon as they were out of his office Beth asked, "Are you taking Ritalin?"

"No, but he seemed pretty sure that it wasn't life threatening, so what does it matter? It could just be another vamp trait. It's a good sign that my brain is not normal human right? That could mean that I am still part vamp." Josef wished.

"We'll see," was all Beth said as they exited the building and headed toward her car. When they got in Beth turned to Josef and asked, "So, what do you want to do now?"

"Let's go get married." Josef grinned as Beth rolled her eyes, but she started her car, pulled out and headed for downtown.