Two more stories to complete!
"The Republic continues to face defeat in the Mandalorian War, and still no news from the Jedi Council. Senate members-"
Kas'shen turned off the holonet and spun around on her bed to look at the chronometer placed on her bedside table. She had been waiting for him for the past three hours, and yet he still hadn't come out of the Council chamber.
She had promised to stay back with him; to be safe with him in the Jedi Temple. The young Knight convinced herself that it was the right thing to do, and yet deep inside, she felt guilty whenever she saw the news.
When Revan started to go to the Council every day for the past month, Kavar had been busy entertaining the holonews reporters. His status as a famed war hero had caused the two lovers to see less of each other, and she didn't like it a bit. The Council didn't help much either. The uproar caused by her furious friend had almost split the Order in half, and she was certain that that was going to happen very soon.
Many of the Jedi agreed with Revan, and others with the Council. Secretly inside, Kas'shen approved with Revan, thinking that it was right to go to war, but she said nothing. She couldn't understand why the Council refused to help, when they were the ones to preach that the Jedi are the guardians of the Republic.
The situation grew more frustrating for her when she started to have arguments with Kavar. He had become somewhat tense, and was always checking on her. She knew she should feel happy that he was paying attention to her, but she couldn't understand why he was so afraid of her leaving him. She felt angry at not being trusted.
Atris had spoken to her the night before and her words rang clear in her head.
Times
of war change people. Even the most timid of all will stand up to
fight something that they do not feel comfortable with.
A
sudden buzz of her doorbell brought her out of her reverie, and she
commanded the door to open. Malak stepped in, and Revan was nowhere
to be seen.
"Kassie."
"Mal, what is it?"
Malak had his arms behind his back, and he stood rigidly beside the bed. He hesitated for a moment before he finally spoke.
"I am not as good with words as Revan is, but…" The tall young man knelt down on one knee to be level with her. "Since she told me to speak to you…I'll try my best, then."
Kas'shen watched him in curiosity and tilted her head to a side.
"You know how Revan is acting lately, with the war and all. I know you agree with her views too."
"What are you trying to say, Mal?"
Malak studied her expression and bobbed his head up and down a little. "We are planning to leave the Order to join in the war effort."
"But that means defying the Order!" Kas'shen exclaimed.
"Yes, but can you stay here and watch these people die with the notion that we, Jedi, are supposed to be their protectors? The Mandalorians have gone too far with this, and it is time to stop them." Malak then exhaled heavily. "I know you are a very reasonable person, Kassie, you understand what has to be done. You are one who believes in justice. You know that the Council is making a very big mistake in not helping the Republic."
Malak's words were spot on. The urge to go to war grew stronger as her friend continued with his talking. But then, the thought of Kavar made her throw away the thought.
"We are leaving, whether the Council agrees or not." He held out a hand and took one of hers. "Will you join us?"
Kas'shen stumbled for the words. "I…I can't, Mal."
The expression on his hopeful face changed into something darker but it went as quickly as it came. Kas'shen clutched her head in her hands and repeated, "I can't, Mal. It's…it's-"
"It's alright, Kassie. I won't force you." He got up and looked down at her. "Try not to tell anyone, though."
He moved towards the door and turned. "Think about it, Kassie. Listen to your heart." With that, he left.
Kas'shen watched him leave, and she felt the guilt build up in her.
"She refused our offer, Rev." Revan opened her eyes when she heard his voice. To his surprise, she chuckled.
Revan turned her chair around and smirked at him. "I knew she'd do that." She got up and sauntered over to him. "But at least she's thinking now."
"What do you mean?"
The young woman wrapped her arms around his waist and looked up at him. Her smile never left her face, and Malak saw the glint of wickedness in her eyes. When she spoke, her voice was husky. "Think about this. Kash is one of the most law-abiding Jedi we know, and yet even with her goody-goody exterior, deep inside she's just another human who's willing to break the law, especially when it comes to helping others. A part of her is telling her that staying back is wrong.
She might come, considering her way of thinking. I know she feels extremely guilty when she watches the news and there are times she curses herself for not helping. And since there are people who think the way she does and are going to take action on it, she'll never want to be left behind."
Malak glanced down at her and smirked too. "Sometimes I wonder how you know all these things, Revan." His arms snaked around her small waist.
"Sometimes, the manipulator's exploitation doesn't work as well as they want, and their attempts can be discovered by others…As for her case, she's smart, but can be lax at certain times."
"So, you went into her head."
Revan chuckled again. "One has to be close enough to her and strong enough in the Force to see what she was thinking. Plus, I had to be very careful." Revan grinned. "She's suffering. The bonds she creates with others are taking their toll now."
Malak smirked again and leaned forward. "You are a devious little minx, Rev."
"And you love me for it." Revan grinned and tilted her head up to accept his kiss.
"Kash?" She stirred when she felt someone plant a soft kiss on her cheek. Kavar sat on the edge of the bed and hovered over her with both his arms on either side of her.
Kas'shen had gotten even uneasy after the talk with Malak and she went to the apartment to clear her mind. Scenes of destroyed worlds, ravaged cities and mutilated bodies kept haunting her, and the guilt hadn't stop building up ever since.
She mumbled incoherently at his kiss and lifted an arm as an indication for him to go away. An amused chuckle sounded and she felt the bed shift.
Kavar removed his outer robes and got under the duvet with her. Kas'shen snuggled up close to him and took in a deep breath. As she did this, she remembered how much she had missed him for the past week.
"You smell." Her voice was muffled by his tunic and despite her complains, she hugged him tightly to her.
Kavar laughed softly and kissed her forehead. "I've been busy lately. Sorry."
"Hmm…for a moment there I actually thought you had an affair with the Council." Kas'shen joked. She opened her eyes, and watched him smile at that.
Kas'shen felt his hand rubbing her back in a circular motion and she felt notably calm at his touch. The young Jedi shifted as she wrapped her left leg around his hips. With a swift movement, Kavar turned her over and positioned himself over her. His apprentice smirked at that while she draped her arms on his neck.
"I missed you…" Kavar muttered as he planted another kiss on her forehead and slowly moved down to her mouth. Kas'shen's breathing increased as she turned her head to expose her throat to him when he moved lower.
She slid her hands under his tunic to feel the taut muscles on his back; Kas'shen almost chuckled when she felt his shoulder tense at her touch. Kavar growled when she ran her fingers lightly over his skin and he nipped her lightly on the hollow of her throat.
Kas'shen inhaled sharply at the bite while he impatiently started to push her shirt off her shoulder.
She woke fully at the tingling sensations left by his soft bites, and the young Jedi closed her eyes to relish in the feeling.
"Think about it, Kassie. Listen to your heart."
Her eyes snapped opened and she stiffened at the memory. Malak's voice kept droning on and on like a mantra and she pulled her arms back from Kavar's neck to hold her head. Throngs of emotions swarmed her as she suddenly felt one of her bonds break.
Kavar felt the sudden change and looked at her. Kas'shen held back a sob and pushed him off her, and ran into the 'fresher.
"Kash?"
Her lover got off the bed and followed her. Kas'shen started to breathe in difficulty and she grabbed the corners of the sink to stop herself from crumbling into a messy heap. Even when the emotions came and went as quickly as they came, the effects lingered on like the imprints of the love-bites on her shoulder.
Malak's words kept droning in her head, and the guilt she felt from before began to build up again. She ignored Kavar, who walked up to her and held her firmly to his chest. She ignored everything that was going on around her.
A shaky hand went to the collar of the shirt and pulled it over her shoulder. Kas'shen looked up to the mirror only to see her very own distressed expression. She averted her eyes to the man behind her and saw him looking at her worriedly.
The woman leaned back into his embrace as he slid his arms around her waist. Kas'shen watched him for a few moments before she spoke.
"Do you think it's right for us to stay here?"
"I do not think anyone will miss us at the Temple." Kavar stroked her hair.
Kas'shen turned around to wrap her arms around him and she placed her head on his chest. "I meant staying back on Coruscant and not going to war." She listened to his steady heartbeat and sighed. "The Mandalorians are near the Core Worlds. Someone I know must've died just now."
She lifted her head to gaze into his eyes painfully. "I felt the pain, and the bond being broken. Usually I wouldn't…it's frequent now…and just now…when we were-"
Kavar shushed her by kissing her softly on the lips. "It's alright, Kash. We have to trust the Council's decision."
"But not every decision made by the Council is right, Kavar," she protested. "They'll still make mistakes!"
"I trust in their wisdom, and you should too." His voice was firm, and his jaws were set in a stubborn line. Kas'shen frowned at him and pushed him slightly away.
"But to let people die? Is that wisdom to leave them alone, Kavar?" She grasped the front of his tunic. "Is it wisdom to let millions die when we are the ones sworn to protect them?"
Kavar returned the frown. "The Council mentioned about a greater threat to the galaxy hidden in the shadows. Joining this war will only serve to worsen the situation."
Kas'shen scoffed at that. "Do you realize that when it comes to this kind of topic, you're always siding with the Council. Why can't you see that they can make mistakes too?" She stormed out of the refresher. "Why can't you see these people need our help?"
"Kash, this is going nowhere. Stop it."
"No, Kavar. I want to understand why we can't go and help. Why we have to sit here waiting." She pulled on her trousers with a little too much force. The experience from the broken bond had affected her greatly and Kavar was getting the brunt of it.
Then she staggered.
Kavar rushed towards her in time to stop her from falling. When he saw her face, he was shocked.
Streams of tears poured from her closed eyes and her face held a painful expression. "Kash? Are you alright?"
Kas'shen shook her head vigorously and grasped her head in her hands as she knelt on the floor. A stunned Kavar followed her to her knees and had a firm grip on her shoulders. He gripped her harder when he felt a tremor from her.
"Kash!"
"Again…someone died again…the Mandalorians…they're near…" she managed between gasps. "Can't…shut…them out!"
Her lover wrapped his arms around her tightly and she tried her hardest not to sob. The waves of agony and horror kept sweeping through her until she forcefully shut off all the bonds she had with others.
The two remained on their spots for a very long time until Kas'shen spoke again.
"I've made up my mind, Kavar." Her master stiffened at that. She ignored him and muttered, "I've been feeling these people die for some time now. I can't go on like this."
She stood up and took her outer-robe from a chair. The young woman looked at her lover with tear-filled eyes and said, "I'm going to war, Kavar. I can't keep that promise I made to you."
"No…"
"I have to."
"No!" Kavar grabbed her arm. "You're not going to war. You promised me."
Kas'shen pushed his hand away gently and spoke firmly. "I am, Kavar. And I won't ask you to come with me."
"The Council will not agree with this." He almost shouted at her.
"The Council is not everything like you think, Kavar." Despite the anger boiling up in her, she managed to keep her tone soft. "I don't agree with them." She spun around and headed for the door.
But Kavar grabbed her arm again and she surprised him with a slap across the face.
"Don't stop me!" Her voice was shaking as she lowered her hand to her side. "You don't know what I'm going through with this war waging on. I feel their pain, Kavar! I feel the pain! I can't sit by and watch any longer. I don't want to feel these pains anymore! Do you even understand how it is for me to go through with this?" She swallowed a nasty growl and continued, "Can't you see what the Council is doing?"
"They are doing what is be-"
"What is best? You're so blind…" She scowled at him. "Everything the Council says is right and what others say is wrong. Am I always wrong then?" A hand rose to stop him from speaking. "I thought that you, as a war veteran would understand." She shook her head incredulously at him. "Go back to your Council if you can't see what's going on in this war. Get married to it."
Kavar tugged at her again when she turned to walk out of the room. "I don't want to do this, Kash, but-" He hesitated for a moment. "You leave me no choice."
Kas'shen glared at him angrily.
"As a member of the Council, I forbid you to go to the war." The woman's eyes widened at that. "And if you disobey the orders of the Council, you will face the consequences."
Her mouth hung open slightly at that, and then she released a laugh. "So you're a member of the Council now." Then she chuckled in disbelief. "And you used your authority as a Council member to order me around."
She released a laugh again and shook his arm off. Without wanting to hear another word from him, she walked towards the door and stopped. "You're a hopeless case when it comes to the Council. I see it now." She turned away from him. "All you wanted was power. Whatever consequences I must face if I come back, I will face it then, Master Kavar." With that, she left.
Kavar was left standing there alone, and distressed.
"You sure you want to do this?" Revan patted her on the shoulder and Kas'shen turned to smile lightly at her.
"Yeah."
Malak stood next to Revan and stooped a little to mumbled something into her ear. Kas'shen ignored the two and surveyed the docking platform she was on. Nisotsa, Barielle, Xaset, Talvon, Cariaga and almost a dozen Jedi including the three were waiting for their transport towards Onderon.
She was shaking a little while she waited. Her argument with Kavar had happened the night before and she feared he would come and stop her again.
And yet part of her feared that he wouldn't.
Her disappointment with his blind devotion to the Council saddened her greatly, yet part of her felt proud for his achievement. I suppose he deserves it. He does…
A tap on her shoulder pulled her out of her thoughts and she looked up to see Malak standing beside her with a mild worried look on his face. "They're here. We have to go quickly."
She nodded and lingered on her spot a little while longer as she observed the entrance to the platform with eagerness. But he didn't come as she hoped. Another call from Malak made her sigh and follow him onto the shuttle.
Kas'shen chose the seat next to a window which was facing the entrance. Revan sat next to her and draped an arm over her shoulder. The meaningful smile the older woman gave her made her wonder if she knew, but she said nothing about it. Her attention was paid towards the entrance.
She felt the shuttle shudder and she closed her eyes. A sudden familiar presence in the Force cause her to snap them open and look out of the window, only to see Kavar running on to the platform. But he was too late.
The sorrowful look on his face was the last she saw from him that day, and a part of her regretted not reconciling with him before setting off for war. Yet another part of her knew it was the best that she didn't see him after the argument, because she feared she would stay back.
She watched him come to a halt at the edge of the platform as her shuttle hovered in the air and prepared to enter space. His arms hung limply beside him as he watched her leave with a forlorn expression, and she shut him out of her view. Revan's arms went around her comfortingly and a single tear fell from the corner of her eye.
Kas'shen wouldn't see him again for a very long time.
And things would have changed…
For the worst.
The End.