Disclaimer: Not mine. If it were mine you would know. Believe me, you would.
A/N: I don't understand why I do these. No one reads them. So…RED LIGHT. PICKLE. DOINK. STOP. GO. PIE. OH MY GOSH. Now, do I have your attention? If I do, great. If I don't, oh well. So, this chapter was way too much fun. I actually planned this wedding so be very proud of me.
Becoming Moony: Bliss
Remus looked down at the bow tie in disdain. He hated those things, they were the spawn of evil and Lily knew that. So why the hell did she pick these stupid things?! A regular tie he could have handled, but a bow tie? Not so much.
Remus picked up the bow tie using only his thumb and index finger, dangling it miserably. Why, oh why, did he have to wear it? Sirius didn't even have to wear a bow tie. He got to wear a rather dashing red and gold striped cravat like James. And what did he get? A damn bow tie.
"You know, Moony, it won't kill you." said Sirius. Remus plopped the offending item into Sirius's hand and glanced at it in disgust.
"Yeah, well. I still don't want to wear that stupid…thing! It's stupid and I won't do it." yelled Remus, crossing his arms and stomping his foot.
"Wow. Give Remus a bow tie and watch his maturity level fall. It's gonna be the newest and greatest show on the television." laughed Sirius, wrapping an arm around Remus's shoulders. Remus huffed and put his face into Sirius's shoulder.
"Why do you get to wear a pretty cravat and I have to wear the stupid bow tie?" whined Remus.
"Come on Remmie. You only have to wear it for a couple hours. What's the problem with bow ties anyways? You wore a long tie to school everyday!"
"Yeah, a long tie. I don't like bow ties. They're so…so…bow tie-ish." said Remus, shoving Sirius as he began to laugh.
"Wow. One little bow tie and Remus falls to the plebian level. Just put it on, Remmie, it won't be so bad."
"Fine." mumbled Remus and wrapped the offending tie around his neck.
/page break/
The ceremony was lovely and everyone agreed on its splendor. The lovely white roses contrasted sharply with the dark red silk and gold chiffon. The whole thing was gorgeous.
Lily was absolutely stunning in her dress. The white silk charmuese dripped down her body and pooled around her feet, dragging behind her as she walked. The form fitting ivory bodice sat upon her like a second skin. The rouging that pulled the eye downward ended in a diagonal with bunches of tiny rosettes and lilies. They lay flat against her right hip and waist and only added to the beauty of the dress. The square neckline accentuated her graceful neck and collarbone and drew you upwards. The long opaque sleeves fell along her upper arms and cut at the elbow, draping and falling down towards the floor she walked upon.
Her hairstyle was that of a beach bohemian; long and curly with one long braid running from the crown of her head to the end of her hair. Baby's breath littered the braid like a vine, creating a sort of tiara. The long cathedral veil that everyone tried to convince her mother out of dragged along the ground, the rhinestones glistening in the artificial light. Lily looked absolutely ethereal and James still couldn't stop staring.
"James, if you don't stop staring at me and look at the bloody camera so that we can leave I will smack you." snapped Lily; obviously not wanting to stand on the shoes she was wearing any longer.
"Alright. Alright." mumbled James, before turning to where the muggle photographer stood. The wedding party grinned at the man with less enthusiasm then there had been two hours ago.
Another hour and, what felt like, three hundred photos later they were done. The photographer, Joseph Mesan, packed his things up and removed himself from the wedding site. The ceremony was already going full force upstairs. The location, Tylney Hall, really was quite lovely for a wedding. It was also very expensive.
James and Mr. Richard Evans had nearly had a heart attack when they saw the full bill. Sirius had seen it as well and had only shrugged and said that it could have been worse. Remus saw it and agreed with James and Mr. Evans; the amount of money was absolutely ridiculous. Almost sixty thousand pounds for one wedding was insane. It wasn't even the wedding dress that had cost the most!
The surprising thing about the dress was that Lily hadn't picked it. Sirius had chosen the gorgeous gown that made Lily look like a princess. Her mother, Elizabeth, had chosen the veil and the shoes. The only thing that Lily had chosen by herself was the way her hair was done!
"Remus? You in there? Or have the photography flashes melted your brain?"
Remus grinned at the bride and wrapped an arm around her waist, "I'm here. Just thinking about how lovely you look."
"Aw, you're such a flatterer. Besides, you have to thank your boyfriend for the dress. It is quite lovely though. I don't even think I would have picked it off the rack if he hadn't seen it." said Lily
"Sirius is good like that. Every once in a while he has a great idea." Remus said, starting to walk Lily towards the door. Lily laughed.
"Yeah, the dress is great. If only I could have convinced my mother that this veil was a bad idea."
"Why did she want such a long veil anyways?" asked Remus, shaking his hand slightly to get rid of aforementioned veil.
"She decided that since she didn't have one at all and Petunia had a shorter one I needed to wear the insanely long one. Stupid really, but I figured she would let me do the flowers the way I wanted if I gave her the veil."
"Did she?" Lily snorted into her hand.
"No. I picked out some lovely pink calla lilies and violets. She said that pink and purple was not going to go with a red and gold wedding. I didn't even want a red and gold wedding. James did. Stupid Gryffindoric tendencies."
Remus laughed, "That does sound like James. What did you want?"
"Purple and gold. A lilac with a dark, rich, gold. Royalty colors, you know?"
"That would have been lovely."
"I know! That's what I said, but did anyone listen? No. And those stupid bow ties!"
"Wait. You weren't behind the bow ties?"
"Good Lord, no. I hate the stupid things, items of hell they are. I wanted ties, long ones. Of course, I wanted a beach wedding in Italy too." Lily said, throwing a hand in the air and flinging her hair back. Remus smiled at her, now he had to forgive her for making him wear the dratted bow tie. But if she wasn't responsible, then who was?
"Father. He loves bow ties. He would wear them twenty-four seven if he could. Mother dislikes them as well, she picked out the cravats."
"Those were rather nice."
"They were, weren't they? I rather thought so. I asked why all the boys weren't to wear them and my father about had a heart attack, stating that the only good neck item was a bow tie! The man is bloody ridiculous sometimes."
"They make me feel like a penguin or a maitre de of some sort." mumbled Remus, just as they walked by Mr. Evans.
"Don't they though? Don't worry, wear it through the speeches and then rip it off, I could care less."
"Don't mind if I do." They both laughed.
/page break/
"Excuse me? Can I have your attention please? Hello?" called Mr. Evans, trying to gain the wedding guests attention. They were all seated at the head table and were ready to start the speeches.
"Here, let me Richard." said Mrs. Potter, standing up. She put two fingers to her mouth and whistled, loudly. There was instant silence. Mr. Evans stared at the usually dignified woman in awe. Elizabeth Evans laughed into her napkin.
"Ah, thank you, Josephina. If I could have everyone's attention, we're about to start with the speeches. Let see. First up is the traditional best man speech so let's hear it for Sirius Black." There was a smattering of applause from the Evans' side and loud whooping from the rest. Sirius stood with a grin and waved a hand for silence.
"Thank you Mr. Evans. Um, lets see here. I know I had one written down but, oh well. Don't look at me like that Lily, I know what I'm doing." Lily had indeed turned and stared at Sirius in undisguised horror. Sirius made a dismissing motion at her and stood up straight.
"My main job tonight, besides getting James here on time, is to introduce the groom to you wonderful people, telling tales about his crazy adventures as a young man, the marathon pub crawling and his string of meaningless courtships. I should then regale you of the marvelous influence of the beautiful bride on our young hero, as she struggled to tame a man with an approach to life that combined ape-like urges with joyous abandon. Of course, I can't cover everything, so I'll just stick with the joyous abandon." Sirius started, with many laughs from the guests and a flushed face from James.
"I first met James on the Hogwarts Express. I was young and impressionable, how was I supposed to know that the bespectled git beside me would lead me down a path of crime and mischief?" there were many snorts and guffaws to this. The idea that Sirius Black had ever been impressionable was improbable. Remus shook his head in amused disgust. What a ham.
"James stuck through all the bruises and hexes, the laughter and the drunken tears and managed to convince the fiery red-head that he had fallen in love with to marry him. Personally, I'm wondering how many favors he promised her. All I know is that I hope they manage to keep the love they share strong, even if it involves tequila and manacles. Good luck to my all but blood brother and my new little sister." Sirius finished, raising his glass to the couple. Everyone in attendance followed in unison with a holler of "Cheers!"
Lily wiped away the few tears that made it down her face and stood to hug Sirius. "Thank you for your wonderful best-manning, Sirius and feel free to have some eggs with that ham any time."
Remus laughed along with the other guests. Things would be okay, even if there was a war going on and they might not live to see the next millennia.
/page break/
Remus collapsed onto the couch with a groan. It was so good to be rid of that infernal bow tie and the dressy shoes. Sure, he loved a great sweater vest but really, the shoes and tie were murder on one's body.
"Glad to be home?" asked Sirius, leaning against the back of the couch, pulling irritably at the cravat at his neck.
"You bet. I'm so full, I don't even want to look at food for the next forty-eight hours." mumbled Remus, pulling a pillow over his head.
"So, you don't want the extra slice of chocolate cake Lily sent home with me?"
"What cake? You didn't tell me there was cake? Especially that chocolate groom's cake. Where is the fucking cake, Padfoot?" yelled Remus, pulling Sirius down to him by the silly cravat. Sirius laughed and pointed toward the kitchen. Remus shot to his feet and went in search of the elusive chocolate cake.
"Did you hear James and Lily's father talking about the cost of the rings? Lily had both her engagement and wedding ring on today. James said that both rings together had cost five thousand five hundred pounds? That's silly. And James's ring was only nine hundred and forty pounds, how crazy is that? I guess that's what you get for getting platinum with point ninety one carat diamonds in it."
"Mmm hmm." mumbled Remus, fingers delicately digging into the hunk of cake. Sirius watched him, amusement evident in the raised eyebrow and smirk that crept across his face.
"You don't even care do you?"
"Uh, no, not really." said Remus, looking at the cake and mentally reviewing the contents of the fridge. Sirius pulled the jacket and cravat off, placing them on the table, and starting to unbutton the white starched shirt he wore.
Remus walked over to the fridge and pulled out the can of whipped cream hidden at the back. He picked up the plate that held the delicious dark chocolate and cream morsel on it and walked over to where Sirius stood, considered the three items carefully, and made an executive decision. With great focus and determination he picked up a piece of the soft cake and smeared it across the hard chest in front of him. Sirius started as Remus then put a glob of whipped cream on top of it.
"What are you doing?!" said Sirius, quite convinced that Remus had lost his marbles.
Remus bent his head to the mess and glanced up at Sirius, "Tastes better this way."
Sirius threw his head back and laughed.
A/N: Tada! Go me! And now a message from my lovely beta.
Hey people. This is Michelle's fabulous (ha! Hear the sarcasm there) beta, Vikertee. She apologizes profusely for the time it took to get this chapter updated. It is entirely her fault. She would like to blame it on her silly friend who leant her all 18 volumes of Fruits Basket over the last two weeks. See, she's had Michelle asking her to read the chapter for well over a week, but she's been reading one or two books a night. Then she's re-read them. Then she's done homework. And she's hardly had enough time to check her emails, let alone give the time necessary to get this right. And how many of you have heard that excuse in reviews from her recently.
So she apologizes for the wait. And she also apologizes for talking in the third person. She just wanted to imagine your faces when you try work it out. Yep, she is insane. It can't be helped.
And finally, she wants to beg for reviews. Because everyone loves them, and Michelle puts a hell of a lot of work into her chapters. Seriously, you should have seen all the pictures she's been sending me over the last couple of weeks in an attempt to a) cheer me up and b) make me work faster. So please review for her. And yeah, I noticed that went back to first person. Sorry. Hope you aren't too confused by my random babble.