Authors note: Well…everyone seemed to like the first chapter….so here's a second one! I think I nearly made it within my two week estimate….hope everyone likes this one!

Summary: Spoilers for "Man Down" Kinda has an AU feel to it. Ryan goes to visit Eric after the case is closed.

Warnings: Spoilers for man down, slash

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. And, while I have not seen any other stories like this, this is my take on the idea; any resemblance to other stories is sheer coincidence.

'thoughts' "talking" ---------: scene change

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Something wasn't right. Something hadn't been right ever since the first night at the hospital. Eric felt restless and incomplete. As if the doctors, while trying to see what damage the bullet had done, had broken something in mind into a bunch of puzzle pieces. And now that he was trying to put the puzzle back together, he discovered that some pieces were missing.

Eric was not stupid. He knew whatever he was missing was probably still rattling around in his head…he just couldn't figure out what it was. His doctor had told him that experiencing mental holes was perfectly normal and that his patchy (at best) memory should come back to him. However, the doctor couldn't say when. The dark haired man sighed tiredly as he shifted slightly on the uncomfortable hospital bed. He was cranky and fed up with this whole situation. He couldn't believe that he had nearly died because some idiot wanted to pay off his car! His head was constantly aching and whenever he had a lapse in thought and moved his leg suddenly, the pain intensified. Overall, Eric just wanted to go home…well home to his parent's house because they were not letting him out of their sight for at least another two weeks.

While Eric loved his mother fiercely, the hovering was starting to get on his already frayed nerves. All he wanted was to go back to work as soon as possible and find those damned missed pieces. A soft knock came from his doorway and he looked up, eager for a distraction.

"Hey Eric" Calleigh said with a small smile seeing that she had Eric's attention. "You up for a visitor?" Eric managed a small half-smile in return.

"You don't always have to knock Cal" he replied, voice hoarse. The blonde merely smiled.

"Well I for one don't want to walk in on anything that I don't need to see," she teased, entering the room and sitting down in the uncomfortable chair beside his bed. "I've seen some of those looks that those nurses have been giving you!" Eric tried to laugh, but it came out sounding flat causing Calleigh to frown. "Eric?"

"Sorry Calleigh…I don't think I'll be very good company today" he replied, closing his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Besides the hole in my leg, the hole in my head and the hole in my memory, nothing" he replied bitterly.

"Eric, you were shot in the head. I think you memory is allowed a little down time." He opened his eyes slightly, ignoring the burning sensation of built-up tears.

"I understand that but it's just so damn frustrating" he said, voice cracking with emotion. "Not everything is missing…I couldn't remember that Mari had died, couldn't remember going down to Brazil… Hell, I barely remember Speed's death!" He let out a deep breath, trying to control himself. "Cal…I don't even remember if I know how to do my job anymore and I have the stupid lawsuit to worry about…"

"Well, that's one thing you remember at least" the blonde CSI said, trying to lighten the moment. Eric wasn't the only one having trouble holding emotion in. He shot her an un-amused look. "Well, until you remember, you can just ask me, or Alexx, or Horatio, or Ryan to fill in the hole." She managed a small grin. "I imagine that Ryan will be especially helpful."

This comment confused Eric greatly. "What are you talking about? I don't even know the guy…didn't even remember that he was a CSI." It took all of Calleigh's strength not to let her jaw drop open in horror as things mentally fell into place; Ryan's mood for the past week, his excuses when it came to questions about Eric, it all now made sense. Eric didn't remember his own boyfriend and she knew that Ryan, the loveable idiot that he was, wouldn't say a damn word to Eric about anything. Her horror then turned to anger.

"Calleigh?" Eric's voice jolted her out of her thoughts. "Is something wrong?"

"No, well, yes but don't worry. I'm about to go take care of it," she said through a tight smile as she stood up. "Any clue as to when you'll be getting out of here?"

"Soon I think" Eric replied with a half shrug. "They took me off the good drugs yesterday so I'm assuming I'll be kicked out within the next couple of days."

"Well that's good."

"Says the person who wasn't on the good drugs," the CSI said dryly. Calleigh laughed and bent down to place a friendly kiss on Eric's cheek.

"I'll see you later" she said softly before exiting the room. As soon as she was out of the hospital, she took out her cell phone and dialed.

"Hey Alexx, it's Calleigh…. Yeah, I just came from visiting him…. Do you know where Ryan is?" She paused and a grim smile grew on her face. "Good, keep him with you until I get there. We need to have a talk with him."

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Ryan frowned slightly as Calleigh walked into Alexx's office and glared darkly at him. "Calleigh?" he asked hesitantly. "Any particular reason why you had Alexx hold me hostage?" Still glaring, the blonde CSI took a seat in a chair beside Alexx.

"Yes, I needed her to get you to a spot where I could yell at you in private. What were you thinking Ryan?!" she said tersely.

"Calleigh, honey, maybe you could explain what exactly you're talking about" the coroner replied quietly, placing a hand on Calleigh's arm. This touch caused Calleigh to take a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"I'm talking about the fact that this idiot right here hasn't told Eric about their relationship!" Ryan paled slightly. Alexx frowned before turning to look at Ryan.

"Ryan, is that true?" Sensing that no matter what he said he would still get in trouble, Ryan adverted his gaze.

"It's not like that…" he replied quietly, wringing his hands together. "It's not like that at all…"

"That's what it seems like Ryan!" Calleigh replied, clearly upset. "I told Eric that you could help him and he asked me why because he seemed to barely know you!" Ryan closed his eyes and let out a tired sigh.

"He doesn't remember me Cal," he said thickly after a few minutes of tense silence.

"So? He hasn't lost any memories, just misplaced them. I'm sure if you were to tell him that…" She trailed off as the young CSI finally looked up at her with a dead look in his hazel eyes.

"No" he replied firmly.

"Why not Ryan?" the blonde asked, sounding frustrated. "Eric knows that someone is missing from his life…it's driving him crazy."

"No" he repeated, moving to stand up. "I won't do that to him."

"Do what baby?" Alexx asked softly. "He hasn't stopped loving you even if he doesn't remember everything."

"You don't understand…" he murmured, moving towards the door.

"What's not to understand?" Calleigh said sounding confused as she stood up as well. "You two are both miserable without each other. Anyone can see that."

"I can't remind him of what we have," Ryan said darkly. "He deserves a chance to have a normal life…this is a chance for him to start over!"

"Don't you think you should let Eric decide that for himself?" Alexx asked, eyes narrowing. "If you're not going to tell him, maybe one of us should." At this, Ryan turned around, panic clear in his eyes.

"No" he practically shouted. He took a deep breath and continued in a softer voice, looking down at the ground again. "You can't, I won't let you."

"Ryan…" Calleigh said, moving towards the brunet. "I don't see what you're so afraid of."

"Don't you guys see the pattern? He doesn't remember his own sister dying, he doesn't remember Brazil, barely remembers Speed dying…he's blocked out all painful memories." He took another deep breath before looking back up at his two friends. "And since he doesn't remember our relationship, that must be painful as well." The two other occupants let out simultaneous gasps of surprise before they both started to speak at once.

"Ryan, you couldn't possibly think that…"

"Baby, I hardly think that's the reason…"

"Just stop" he said, sounding exhausted. "Please…just, leave this alone." With that said, he quickly left Alexx's office, struggling to hold his tears. Why couldn't they just understand?

TBC

Thanks for reading…I'm aiming to have another chapter up within the next two weeks if all goes well.

Hopefully I caught all the typos, if not, just let me know and I'll fix them!