Author's note: I offer my apologies for the 6 month wait. I had to move back home from school and then was really sick for awhile. But things seem to be back on track now and the next chapter, which will be the last one, is more than halfway done. I can guarantee that it won't be done for next week (too much school stuff to do) but more than likely the week after that. So, again I apologize for the really long wait. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Summary: Spoilers for "Man Down" AU, kinda. Ryan goes to visit Eric after the case is closed.

Warnings: Spoilers for "Man Down", slash, itty bitty spoilers for any episodes after "Man Down"

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. And, while I have not seen any other stories like this, this is my take on the idea; any resemblance to other stories is sheer coincidence.

'thoughts' "talking" --------- scene change

This chapter takes places a couple of months after the last one.

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In hindsight, Ryan should have seen this coming. There had to have been at least ten different clues in the past couple of days that he could have picked up on if he had only been paying attention.

The first time him, Eric and Calleigh had all gone out together had been more than a little awkward. Calleigh had tried too hard to keep up a conversation while Ryan, afraid to say anything in case his subconscious took over and spilled everything to Eric, stayed silent. Needless to say, it had been an absolute disaster and Ryan had figured that it would never happen again. However, Calleigh and Alexx were more persistent than he had originally thought and had invited both he and Eric out to various places and slowly, the awkwardness of their first outing together was worn down and Ryan could even go so far to say that he and Eric had built some sort of quasi-friendship. He didn't even get that nervous around Eric anymore, just as long as he wasn't left alone with his former lover.

This was what was going to make tonight hell for Ryan. Over the past couple of months, the desire to blurt out their former relationship to Eric was overwhelming. But just as soon as Ryan had made up his mind to do so, he would then notice just how happy Eric was and then stuffed this need back into the darkest corners of his mind. Looking up at the doors to the restaurant, Ryan finally saw Eric enter. He hesitantly lifted his arm and waved slightly to get Eric's attention. This worked and his friend slid past one crowd of people and proceeded to make his way over to Ryan.

Ryan frowned slightly as Eric got closer to the table, lines of tension easily visible on his forehead. He knew Eric had been suffering from headaches lately and this looked to be a bad one. Worry overriding his anger about being setup, Ryan stood to greet Eric.

"Hey" he said weakly before clearing his throat. "You okay? You don't look that great." Eric managed a small, tired smirk for the brunette before sitting down at the table, Ryan quickly following suit.

"Thanks for the compliment" Eric replied, trying to put a teasing lilt to his voice so that Ryan would know he was only being sarcastic. Instead, Ryan's frown only deepened.

"Another headache?" he guessed, trying not to sound overly concerned even as his thoughts were racing around, already theorizing what exactly could be wrong with Eric. Could the bullet have shifted and was now pressing against something vital? Maybe these headaches were a sign that Eric's memory was returning? But if that was true, Eric would have said something by now. Ryan had first recognized the signs (lines of tension on Eric's forehead, eyes squinting slightly) over a month and a half ago.

"Yeah" Eric replied, startling Ryan out of his thoughts. "But it's getting better now." He offered what he hoped was a somewhat seductive smile to the brunette sitting across from him. "I wonder why…maybe because of your company." Ryan blushed involuntarily and adverted his eyes. It was getting harder and harder to resister Eric's flirtatious suggestions and physical advancements. Nothing big, just a gentle hand placed on Ryan's shoulder from time to time, adding a gentle squeeze when he was upset about something. His thoughts then shifted from worrying to trying to keep his nerves about being around Eric alone in check.

"Alexx and Calleigh not here yet?" Eric asked quickly, sensing from Ryan's facial expressions and movements that he was getting nervous so he better change the subject quickly before Ryan decided to bolt or something.

The CSI shook his head. "No, we've been ditched by the both of them. Calleigh called me and said that she still had a lot of work to do on her case and Alexx said that she had a family thing come up" he explained dryly. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say they planned this."

Eric struggled to hide his wide grin as a waiter approached their table and asked if they were ready to order. He might have suggested to Calleigh and Alexx that he had wanted to be alone with Ryan. He also might have mentioned that since Ryan seemed slightly more comfortable around him, tonight might be a good night to have a more private dinner with, if all things worked out, his soon-to-be lover. And it was certainly not his hints that he had dropped earlier that day that had caused both Alexx and Calleigh to cancel. Having tackled this first obstacle, he mentally moved onto the second: trying to keep Ryan from becoming too nervous and deciding to leave.

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Half an hour later, Eric sighed as Ryan fidgeted in his seat once again. "Look, I know we've been setup and I can tell that you're uncomfortable being here alone with me so you can leave if you want to" he said bluntly but then offered the brunette a small smile. "I'll even promise that I won't tell Calleigh or Alexx that you left early." Ryan froze at this comment before offering a small smile of his own back.

"No Eric, it's not you…well, uh, it sort of is because of you but not the way you're, uh…" Ryan paused, not sure how to fix the awkwardness between him and his ex-lover. "I'm making a total mess of things." Eric agreed with a small nod and motioned with a hand for Ryan to try again. "I just…don't know how to talk to you. I don't want to say anything insensitive." A light pink blush decorated his cheeks. "I do that a lot without realizing it."

"I promise I won't take offense to anything you say" Eric replied, trying to hold back a laugh. "Just talk to me like you did before."

'I wish I could' Ryan thought sadly before sitting up straighter and managing to look Eric in the eye for the first time that night. "All right, I'm holding you to that though." The Latino CSI offered his partner his lopsided smirk, happy to be able to see those amazing green eyes again.

"You do that" he murmured, more to himself than Ryan, who had started to hesitantly talk about something. Eric really didn't care about the subject, he simply let Ryan's voice wash over his body, soothing every nerve and worry from a long day's work.

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Since Ryan had taken a cab to the restaurant, Eric had offered to drive him home. They had spent a pleasant 2 hours finishing their supper and talking before each indulging in overpriced desserts. While Ryan had chatted nervously through the entire evening, Eric had been more content to sit back and listen. His headache from earlier that evening had disappeared and he was quite pleased with the fact that he had gotten Ryan all to himself for a whole evening without having to tie the brunette to his chair or tackling him to the ground if Ryan had tried to make a break for it. Not that these situations wouldn't be interesting, but there would be plenty of other times to explore these kinds of ideas. Preferably when Ryan wasn't sitting in the car next to him, still rambling away with Eric nodding and agreeing occasionally.

Ryan blinked a few minutes later, suddenly going quiet as Eric swung his car into the driveway in front of Ryan's house. "Uh…did I tell you where I lived?" he asked, confused as to how Eric knew. He glanced over only to find an equally confused look on the other CSI's face.

"You didn't tell me" he murmured, slipping the shift into park. "And I haven't driven you home before…so maybe it was just something that I subconsciously remembered." At this comment, it was Ryan's turn to remember that this wasn't his Eric.

He gulped silently as Eric, who he mentally referred to sometimes when he desperately needed to put distance between reality and his memories as the non-Eric, turned to face him. This time, Ryan found himself not able to look away from Eric's soulful brown eyes. It was out of sheer habit that he didn't pull back from Eric when he reached up and cupped Ryan's cheek gently with a hand, thumb moving back and forth ever so slowly across the smooth skin. "I had fun tonight Ryan" he murmured, keep his movements slow and voice soft as to not frighten him away. Ryan merely blinked, his mind screaming at him to get out of the car right now but his body didn't seem to be listening. If anything, his muscles relaxed slightly under Eric's touch, leaning towards it rather than pulling back.

Shifting closer, Eric moved so that his face was mere inches from Ryan's, his words blowing soft puff of hot air over the brunette's lips. "I like you" he nearly whispered, placing his other hand on Ryan's shoulder. "And I want you Ryan. And what I want, I get." With that, he closed the final distance and gently pressed his lips to Ryan's. Ryan responded automatically with a near silent moan as the heat from the kiss spread throughout his body and out of habit he opened his lips slightly, allowing Eric to deepen the kiss at his desire which he did a few short second later, tongue gently tangling with Ryan's, before caressing the inside of the brunette's mouth as though mapping out foreign territory.

It was then that the panic in Ryan's head finally kicked in full force and he pulled back with a sharp gasp, shivering slightly as want and need coursed through his body. "I…I can't" he stuttered, fumbling for the door handle. "No, just….leave Eric. Please." Finally, he got it opened and bolted out of the car and into his house.

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Ryan's heart pounded frantically as he escaped into his house and slammed his door shut before sagging back against it. This was all so confusing. Eric didn't remember their previous relationship…or at least Ryan thought Eric didn't remember. He didn't think Eric could tease him like that so if Eric didn't remember, then he was trying to start another relationship with him. That would imply that even though Eric didn't remember, he still wanted to pursue Ryan. Ryan's hand drifted up to his kiss-swollen lips, his mind still trying to grasp the fact that the non-Eric still wanted him. Wincing at the headache building up behind his eyes, the brunette pushed himself upright and headed for the bathroom. He would not allow himself to hope that on some subconscious level Eric did remember. One day, he might remember but until then Ryan simply had to avoid Eric…and ignore his advances. This was not going to be easy.

It was a couple of days later before Ryan found himself back at the lab. His two days off had been anything but relaxing. He couldn't stop thinking about the kiss and was so lost in his thoughts, he didn't hear the footsteps approaching him from behind.

"Mr. Wolfe?"

Startled, Ryan managed not to call out but did jump a little at the sound of his boss's voice before craning his head over his shoulder to look at Horatio. "Sorry, did you need something H?" he asked curiously.

"I've just gotten word that the suspect in your current case may have been back at the crime scene. It would be a good idea to go and see if he left anymore evidence this time around" Horatio replied in an even tone. Ryan nodded in agreement, before closing his locker door and turning around fully.

"All right. There wasn't much before so hopefully this time around he wasn't as smart and we'll be able to get him off the streets" the brunette agreed, managing to put a small smile on his face. He turned to walk out of the locker room but stopped when Horatio put a hand on his shoulder.

"I'll go with you" the red-head added, as if he sensed that Ryan was more than a little distracted today. Ryan simply shrugged and nodded again, not questioning why Horatio had decided to tag along. He was more than happy for the help since the crime scene was rather large and at least it wasn't Eric helping because he knew that if he had to work with the Latino CSI any time soon, things would not work out well.

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As soon as Calleigh put the Hummer in park in the CSI parking lot, she stretched her arms forward slightly in order to try and work some of the kinks out of her upper back. 'That crime scene was brutal' she thought, wincing slightly as something popped back into place. Four hours of bending and squatting to take photos and collect evidence could wreck havoc on anybody. She reached to turn off the car when her police radio suddenly crackled to life.

"This is Lieutenant Horatio Cane. I need back up at 345 Rivergrove Street. Shots fired. Officer down, I repeat, Officer down."

TBC

Let me know if you see any spelling or grammar mistakes. I typed this up really quickly before class so there's probably something wrong, lol. Thanks for reading.

Wishful Thinker