Wow this is a long chapter. 5022 words I think. Anyway it's a big chapter because quite a lot of things happen in it but I will say more at the end

Disclaimer : AVATAR ISN'T MINE!

First day of the Summer Solstice

Fire Lord Taishi 25

Year of the Sun

Eight hours before Noon

It's amazing how still some mornings can feel.

The golden mist of the sun fogging the gardens and causing the turtle duck pond to reflect the pink and purple of the morning sky. The birds chirping and the tree branches swaying but thats the only noise...the rest is silence. A silence that makes you think your the only person in the world. It makes you feel different...wiser..older.

I awoke early this morning and I fear I only got a few hours of sleep.

I could not find Kari last night. When I asked her maid she replied that Lady Kari was out on a walk with Lord Jin Li.

That didn't improve my mood. I felt despair and anger welled up inside me for I could not tell anyone...the pain of the new scar on my cheek still hurting me.

I do not know how I managed to get a scar. By my knowledge slaps leave only large red marks that fade...not a scar.

Yet it is a small scar I have nonetheless. It just looks like Yin Wei's accidently rubbed me on the cheek with one of her red pencils...I suppose make-up would cover it.

I know I cannot tell Chen. He would probably cause a scene and no doubt hit father himself. Although it is tempting to let it leak...I know I will later but for today I cannot for It is Solstice and a holy day...a day of the spirits and I do not wish to upset anyone else even though part of me wouldn't care if I did.

Anyway when I awoke this morning a sleep fog hung over me but I knew I must get up. It just felt like the right thing to do so I dressed in my formal Kimono. The one reserved for this mornings ceremony at the temple.

It is the only black kimono I possess. It is black with dark red sleeves, sash and collar. It is very plain save two red reeds embroided at the bottom which stretch out and nearly touch the sash.

My hair I pinned up in a ponytail. I outlined my eyes in dark eye pencil and I did not bother with make-up for my scar.

I crept through the palace and outside into the gardens. For many minutes I sat peacefully next to the Koi pond watching the red Koi fish swim playfully.

Mei Xing tells me they have Koi fish in the spirit oasis at the Northern Water City. She says that's why she liked these gardens...those Koi fish reminded her of the ones she played with at her home.

The Avatar must have arrived. Where he is I do not know but the Solstice is usually spent with family in the mornings before the festival and celebrations in the afternoon. Usually the families exchange small gifts. I used to spend the Solstice with my siblings...father of course was never there.

It was still good. I'd usually get a few presents. Then we'd go into the village and attend the village celebrations before going for dinner at our favourite restaurant.

My heart pangs when I think of that. I cannot help feel those days are drawing to an end. I feel sorry for little Shinji spending the Solstice on his own! How cruel of father not to include him!

I know Mei Xing will have breakfast and spend this morning with her tribe. Princess Mayleen will do the same. I know the Fire Lord and his family wish to have a private breakfast too so they may say their own congratulations to Prince Sozin.

As for us I do not know. I do not wish to be here if father or Jin Li will attend. It will not be a family occasion if that happens.

I think...perhaps I shall write to Shinji. I know it will not arrive for at least three days but I think it shall be a comfort to him when It does.

I have written the letter. I had to sneek inside and retrive a quill and parchment. Luckily the guards let me by without much fuss.

Dear Shinji,

I miss you so for It is not as fun here as it is at home (trust me, I am being force to sit and dine with Jin Li!)

I will probably buy you a gift at the festival. The last week has been fairly boring save the arrival of Mielia and the Water Tribe Princess Mei Xing.

I had an arguement with father last night...he makes me so mad Shinji! I know you will understand for you have my temper...it turns out father has it too but I will not say much more.

As for Prince Sozin I have avoided him for much of the stay. I intend to continue doing so...Princess Mayleen is getting along with him nicely...I have no arguements against an allegiance with the Earth Kingdom.

I could write pages and pages to you brother but I feel I should just be waffling as always. Shinji...you are not forgotten and everyone sends there love and when we get home you will probably be burried under gifts.

Love your sister,

Maeko x

I think I shall post this now. I know it cannot be much after dawn. I know because I can see the sun rise...it will be warm today...I can feel the chi seeping through me as it always does at sunrise.

The energy that courses through your body...it feels like you are waking up with the sun. It alerts your senses and it makes you want to act on impulse...it makes you feel alive.

I wonder if Mei Xing feels like this with the moon? I shall have to ask.

five hours before Noon

I am in the temple of Agni Ra.

Words cannot describe it. On the inside it is all lit with burning torches. The walls are a deep red and engraved with gold and rubys. Great tapitries hang and the guards are robed in gold while the priests in red and black. At the end of the main chamber is a great fire! This is where really important people come to prey.

I suppose I should explain how I ended up in this temple.

I went to the stables and told them I required a messenger rider immediantly. I gave them my letter and they said that it should arrive at Lake Azu by the final day of the Solstice.

I found myself then not knowing what to do so I paced the gardens for some time. I wanted guidence...and then I saw the glimmer the golden outer wall of the Temple.

It wasn't easy...the guards were unwilling to let me leave the palace without an escort or word from my brother or father. I lied and told them that Lady Bei Fong would alow me leave.

I did however have to have an escort of six guards. Honestly six guards just to drive a carriage three miles? It is silly.

When we did reach the temple I was having doubts. What use would the temple be? I was already going to have to spend an hour of my afternoon there listening to a boring sermon.

Luckily the guard spoke before I could hesistate.

"Who wishes to pass?" Asked the door guard.

"Lady Maeko Azu second daughter of Lady Mari Azu now passsed and third child of Grand Vizier Lin Azu" I announced firmly although I scowled at letting them know that I was related to that arrogant selfish moron.

They allowed me entrance and I found myself wandering the many corridors just staring at the artwork and architecture. The temple took twenty years to complete. It was built by our second Fire Lord so it is over a thousand years old.

They have marvellous archways of gold and the floor is marble. Truly it is a monument to the Fire Nation. It isn't as holy as the temple of the Avatar on the cresent island but it is...it has something...

I must have walked for a while...I was drifting in my own thoughts and worries, the least were the sharp pains that were coming from the scar on my cheek.

It was in this daze that I did not realise where I was walking. I walked straight into a man.

Or at least thats what I thought. I thought he was another priest until I saw he was much taller and younger. Even by the dull light of the torches I could see the power glimpsing through the golden eyes...even though we'd rarely met in person I knew it was the Avatar because he wore the crown of our Prince.

I bowed and blushed.

"I'm sorry my Lord Avatar...excuse my clumsiness"

"It's fine Lady...why are you here so early in the morning?"

"I could not sleep...I decided since I was coming here in a few hours anyway for the ceremony that I might as well be early" I said shortly.

"Tell me child...why could you not sleep?" He asked.

It was odd. I thought it odd that the Avatar would take so much interest in my doings...couldnt he accept my answer and go?

"I have my own reasons for not sleeping" I said calmly before walking away quickly before he could question me any more.

I walked until I reached the Great Fire. Only the important people like the Fire Lord or the Avatar pray here.

I decided that it was a good chance to pray. Not that I am a praying person but the Great Fire is said to be blessed by Agni.

I knelt watching the flames of red and yellow climb higher and higher. I watched them dance mesmorsing me from my thoughts. They danced wilder and wilder...strange how fire can be so...so...so beautiful...yet so angry?

I tried to think of what to pray for? I could have a huge list...

I watched the flames as they glowed purple and blue...all I could hear was the sound of them crackling and hissing. I forgot about the temple and it's guards...they were so very far away.

"I pray for the spirit of my mother. Lady Mari and I hope that she is well and enjoying her afterlife" I whispered.

The fire crackled and burned a little higher.

"I pray for...for..I do not know. I pray that...I know this is wrong but I don't care. I pray that I will not have to marry one whom I do not love! It isn't right or fair and I will not marry him! I pray that Princess Mei Xing will not either!"

The flames burned higher. I did not know whither it was at my own subconsious bidding though because I felt the chi burn stronger in my body.

"I also Pray...I pray...for Mielia. I want her to have a good life instead of being chained to that arrogant prat!"

My scar twinged and I touched my cheek as a wave of fury swept over me.

"I pray that my father will understand his own karma!"

I stepped away as heat emmitating from the flames was red hot.

The flames died down and left me feeling like a prize fool for yelling at fire. Thats all it was. A stupid fire that I had vented my frustrations upon...no guidence...no help.

Urgh! I bellowed in frustration as the torches flamed dangerously high.

I ran then. I ran and ran and ran until I reached the entrance of the temple and ran clear out the door until I reached my carriage.

I am a fool. A fool for hoping that help would magically come to me through fire.

Five hours after Noon

My temple visit seemed like a dream. I arrived back at the Palace asleep in the carriage until I stumbled into my bed and slept until my maid woke me up two hours before noon.

I did feel better after some sleep though. As it turned out neither my Father nor Jin Li attended breakfast. It was just Chen, Kari and I.

"We should really write to Shinji" said Chen between mouthfulls of bread and fruit.

"Chen for spirit's sake eat with your mouth closed," lectured Kari, "Yes of course we should write to Shinji. He's probably thinking we've forgotten about him."

I swallowed my fruit, "I already have" I said.

"Oh well. Still I expect he shall want to hear from Kari and me too" said Chen.

"Maeko...where did you get that scar?" Asked Kari staring at my cheek.

"I...I got it in a training session" I lied.

Kari narrowed her eyes in suspicion and Chen's expression went serious.

"Maeko ten out of ten for your lies but you always get burns not scars. Where did you get it?" Asked my brother.

I gulped. Telling them then would only result in a riot and I wanted to tell them after the solstice.

"I'll tell you later...honest" I said.

Chen did not look pleased with this answer but Kari reading my expression immediantly started a new subject.

"We'll need to stick close to you tonight Mae, I know you intend to keep far away from Sozin but you must realise that it will be quite impossible. Father is very determined that you should meet him...or so he told me yesterday."

I silently fumed with anger. Not only had he been arrogant enough to hit me he also had to go behind my back.

"Yes but luckily for Maeko so is Princess Mayleen" joked Chen.

"That's all very good but if the Prince has any personality then he will try to avoid her by asking another girl to dance" said Kari, "I think that we should stay very near to her...Jin will understand that family comes first."

"Thanks Kari" I said feeling a rush of affection for my sister.

"Not a problem. Father also mentioned that I might want to convince you to change your kimono" smiled Kari.

"Change her kimono? She's nearly of age for Agni sake! Purple is as good a colour as any. Father needs to get out more in the world! We haven't had a war for seventy years but he acts like one might happen tomorrow! Everyone in the City where's what they please"! Protested Chen.

"I know and I told him that purple was a very upcoming colour among females. He has no sense in the world of fashion so he will listen to me" said Kari.

I shall not bore you with the rest of our breakfast time chat for I have a lot more to tell.

At the ceremony we all sat down in ailse, the most important people at the front ect.

In the front row there was of course the Fire Lord and his family, Princess Mayleen, Princess Mei Xing and her uncle.

I was sitting in the seond row and thankfully many seats away from my father. I was next to Mielia and right behind Prince Sozin.

The great fire gleamed in front of us. I could remember this mornings chants at it. I also began to wonder how they set up our seats so fast.

The first part of the ceremony was quite dull. The old Priest basically told us the importance of the Solstice and what a holy day it was and he made us say prayers to the spirits of Agni.

I must admit I found it all rather dull but Mielia was there beside me immitating the old priests voice under her breath which was quite amusing.

I could not help however but stare at the back of Prince Sozins head with curiosity. He was tall...about a head taller than me. Quite broad shoulders too, his skin was fair and his silky black hair was in a topknot. He wore a red tunic with black armour and boots.

"So thank the spirits for the happiness you feel. Thank the spirits for you families good health" chanted the Priest.

"Yeah and thank the spirits when I shut up" muttered Mielia.

I covered my hand with my mouth in an attempt to stop myself from laughing. The Prince must have heard what Mielia said too for he turned around slightly to get a better view of the joker.

He glanced at Mielia who rolled her eyes showing no respect for her nations Prince, then Prince Sozin glanced at me.

He is handsome. I'm not going to deny that. He has good bone structure and his face is very elegantly set but it's his eyes that stand out the most. A deep penetrating gold. They seem orange on the outside but towards the pupil they turn gold. It's like his eyes have fire trapped inside them.

I stared back. I learnt from Mielia that they consider it a weakness in the fighting world if you look away when an opponent glares at you.

I glared at him for several seconds untl my eyes began to water. He turned around and paid me no heed from then onwards.

The second half of the ceremony was meant to be lead by Avatar Roku. I was very interested to see the yielder of all the elements and the bridge between the spirit world.

Actually some of the stuff he said was interesting. He told us how we should respect every living being of any gender or class. He also mentioned about us all being one and the same. He mentioned the Nations being the same and lots of other unity talk.

I could see many airbending monk and nuns nodding in agreement.

We finally left the sermon at One hour after noon for the festival and parade.

It was amazing. There was confetti all over the city square. People of all races were celebrating with us. When I was alowed to wander freely with Mielia and Mei Xing we saw Fire dancers and jugglers. Plays and stalls were you could win prizes. It was amazing tosee how many ordinary people had travelled. Water Tribe people were littered all over the place. Mei Xing spotted out a male member of the Southern Tribe and smiled slightly.

We went to the circus to see the acrobat perform. It was pure freedom just being able to wonder from place to place in bright warm sunshine. I felt at peace and free.

"We'd better get back to the city square. Wouldn't want to miss the Fire Lord's speech" said Mielia in a bored voice.

So we once again gave up our freedom to stand on the platform over looking the crowd.

It was shocking seeing just how many people there were. Hundreds...maybe thousands of blue, grey, brown, green and golden eyes gazing at us.

I smiled at one woman in the crowd. An Air Nomad I think who was supporting a gurgling baby girl.

The Fire Lord and Lady stepped forward to address the people.

He spoke for a while about forging new alliances with other nations. He talked of the benefits of peace and how we all lived and breathed as one.

The crowd cheered and then Fire Lady Lien addressed them.

"I am also proud to announce that today is the eighteenth birthday of my oldest child and heir to the throne of the Fire Nation Prince Sozin and also the birthday of our honoured Avatar Roku!"

The people cheered and the Fire Lady continued.

"I am proud of my son and I know he will serve his nation with honour. I hope that he will be able to forge new alliances and find happiness within himself."

Prince Sozin smiled uneasily before bowing.

"Now I am honoured to say that Avatar Roku would like to say a few words."

Avatar Roku stepped forward and spoke about peace too and then everyone cheered again and the festival continued until an hour ago.

Also it had just occured to me that I have had this diary for a month now. A month full of entries. I wonder...I have made up my mind that if I have a daughter I shall give her this diary and my mother diary. Guidence for those who need it.

Now I am in my room with five maids doing my bidding. I must go for one of them is tapping her foot.

Eight Hours after Noon.

Three hours it took me to get ready. I had five maids who did my make-up, hair and dressed me.

After two rows about my hair and choice of jewelerry we finally finished.

My hair is not done up. It is instead left long although they curled it slightly with irons and I fear that my scalp is badly burned because the maid doing my hair was very violent with them.

They didn't have to do much with my make-up. They covered up the scar and outlined my eyes in sliver and purple and painted my lips red.

My kimono is beautiful but not easy put on. It's made of pure silk and has many layers. It doesn't weigh me down too much though and the colour is lovely. It's sliver with a bright lilac sash and little flowers printed up all over it. It shines in the light and I feel like a Princess when I wear it.

The maids argued over my jewelerry. One said I should wear sliver and red and the other said I should wear plain sliver. It lasted until I snapped and told them to bring a selection through so that I could choose.

I chose a sliver bracelt with a purple gem and a matching necklace, long sliver beads and sliver and amythest earings and finallly a silver tiara that is shaped in a perfect circle with a single blood red ruby hanging down on my forehead.

For once I felt beautiful and I know I look beautiful. I felt pretty and I felt like a woman, confident and seductive! I felt giddy with happiness! I could not wait to show Kari!

When I found my sister she looked...she looked undescribably wonderfully beautiful.

Her kimono was a soft creame colour with gold flowers that stretched from the foot of the kimono to the gold sash. Her hair was in a bun with loose curls falling down her back. Her face looked perfect with golden and creme eye make up and flawless skin. She had little jewelerry but she did have a small golden crown shaped like the ones the Fire Lady wears.

"K-Kari?" I asked staring in awe.

"You look wonderful Maeko" she smiled.

"Right back at you" I said.

Everyone seems to look wonderful tonight.

Mielia looks femine for once. Her hair has been smoothed and she wore a rich red kimono with golden sashes and flames spiralling up the dress. On her head she wears a golden tiara with rubies. I think she is pleased to be wearing something other than green and she does look amazing.

Princess Mei Xing told me she felt strange wearing kimono's because she never wears them normally but tonight she looked as beautiful as my sister in her blue kimono and a true crown with sapphires.

The gardens were all lit up with torches and lights. There is a band playing and a table with food lain on it.

We wondered Idly for a while steering clear of Prince Sozin and Princess Mayleen.

Eventually we sat down and Mei got asked to dance almost immediantly by a young Earth Kingdom noble. Her chaperone (a senoir member of her tribe) nodded and they danced.

I could see Kari dancing with Jin Li. Many men were eyeing Kari and shooting looks of poison at Jin Li for getting one of the prettiest girls at the ball.

I sighed watching the young couples sway under the moonlight. I am not a romantic type of girl but it would be nice if someone noticed me?

Even Mielia got asked to dance leaving me alone.

I watched as Mielia danced with some Water Tribe boy. As a married woman Mielia did not have to have a chaperone like me. She was free to dance with whoever she wanted without asking for permission.

I watched the thrones where the Fire Lord and Lady sat smiling at how excellently their ball going.

"Do you want to dance?"

I jumped. The voice came from behind me and turned around and came to face to face with a pair of golden eyes. The same fiery golden eyes I saw earlier at the Ceremony.

The one person I had been avoiding for a month.

Prince Sozin was asking me to dance!

One hour after Midnight

I am very tired. The ball only ended an hour ago and cleaning my face and getting undressed from my kimono was a tedious buisness but now I am thankfully tucked up in my warm bed.

I can still feel the shock venting through me though. Prince Sozin asked me to dance! All my efforts were fruitless!

Of course when he asked I replied that I must first ask my brother knowing full well that I would not get permission...then...oh I hate him!

This is what happened. This is the exact events that unfolded tonight.

"I am honoured Prince Sozin but first I must ask permission for I am not yet sixteen" I said politely.

"Maeko Prince Sozin has asked you to dance!" Growled a voice.

Whirling around and nearly tripping up on my kimono I set my face into a death glare. Behind me stood my father.

"I was merely going to ask whiether I had permission father" I said through clenched teeth.

"And I say you have permission" said my father,

"Oww" I groaned.

"What is the matter?" Asked the Prince as my hand flew to my left cheek.

I rubbed away the make up that covered it up until my scar was revealed.

"Why don't you explain to his Royal Highness about why my left cheek has a scar father!" I hissed marching off surprised at my boldness.

My cheek did not hurt but I wanted him to see. I wanted him to know what he'd done.

I walked through the gardens and away from the noise and music of the ball. Away from my father and away from Prince Sozin.

I don't know how far I walked but I came to a small garden with a fountain.

I was wondering if maybe I had said too much. I'd probably gone and made a fool of myself again. Why is it that I cannot contain my anger?

I lit a small sphere of blue fire. I had one way to vent anger but I don't think setting my fathers robes on fire would be a good idea...well not in front of the Fire Lord anyway.

I watched as the sphere of fire rolled into a long coil like Mei's water. I'd watched Mei waterbend...I tried to copy her movements.

At my bidding the fire coil wavered up and down and twirled and danced for my entertainment.

I gazed up at the starry sky. It makes you feel so small when you see it. All the stars lit up and glowing like diamonds.

After a while I calmed down and decided to go back to the dance and find Mielia.

When I found her she was helping herself to some wine at the food table. We sat down and talked for a little while about things.

"You should come and visit Mae" said Mielia.

I sighed. It wasn't a bad Idea. I could do with some time to get away from my father...a stay with Mielia would be great. I would have complete freedom to do what I wished.

"Maybe I will" I said dreamily.

I watched Princess Yin Wei as she drew enthuastically. Prince Sozin grinned over her shoulder and nodded in apporval.

"Mae why is your father standing up?" Asked Mielia.

My eyes glanced over at the platform where the Fire Lord and Lady sat...they were no longer sitting but standing and smiling with my father, Kari and Jin Li.

The band stopped playing and everything went silent as the Fire Lord spoke.

"I have wonderful news. To night my esteemed Grand Vizier gave consent to Lord Jin Li to ask for his eldest daughters hand in marriage. I am delighted to announce that Lady Kari Azu accepted!"

Everything went silent. I could see people cheering but I could not hear them. On the platform Kari smiled shyly while my Father grinned broadly and Jin Li bowed arrogantly. No...this could not be happening I thought. Not...not...marriage!

My eyes scanned the crowd for Chen who wore a similiar look of distaste.

No...ruin everything...what happened to family is more important!

My heart sank and I could feel tears well up in my eyes. I felt cheated and betrayed. No family anymore because Kari would move in with him! Everything was ruined!

Kari! Are you alright? Asked Mielia with concern in her golden eyes.

"I-I'm fine...just...fine...I'm J-Just going to sit down" I stammered pouring myself a glass of wine and sitting down out of view from the dancing couples.

I could feel tears leaking down my cheeks. I couldn't even drink the wine properly for wine always burns my throat.

I could have screamed in frustration but I didn't want to attract any attention. I just wanted out.

I gulped down the rest of my wine and marched over to Mielia.

"I'm going back home with you. I'm going to get Shinji and then I'm coming with you" I said firmly.

"Are you sure that isn't the wine talking?" Asked Mielia.

"Positive. I am going to the Earth Kingdom with you!"

Well I didn't do much else for the rest of the night. I said a small congratiulations to my sister and went to bed.

Mielia says that she has to leave to go back to the Earth Kingdom in two weeks. That gives me enough time to send for Shinji. My father will probably not let me go but I do not care. I'm going!

I hope you liked it, next time you get to see her family's reaction to her plans. To be honest I think she deserves a vacation. Also Kari tries to have a word to her about the joys of marriage.

incase you forget...

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