Chapter 7: Characterization

Part III: Not who I seem

"I think I'm joining the Blitzball Team," Rikku said. I was sitting at the table and focused on my eggs until I heard her comment. I looked at her and asked, "What would you wanna go and do that for?"

"Oh you know…" I gave her a look.

"No. I don't. Hence the reason I'm asking why you'd want to do it." Blushing slightly, she looked to make sure my mother was out of hearing range before whispering to me, "I really want to get closer to Riku." I shook my head disapprovingly.

"What? What's so wrong with that? I mean, I really like him Kairi. I mean, like a lot. I want him to be my boyfriend."

"And you think that by joining the team he'll automatically fall head over heals and ask you to be his girlfriend? You realize you're only fifteen and he's eighteen. He could get in trouble for having a relationship with a minor, which I doubt he is too enthusiastic about," I explained. I forked some more eggs into my mouth and as I chewed Rikku smiled mischievously and said, "Yea. So you think. We've kissed already." I nearly choked on my eggs.

"Say what!??" I asked. She nodded giddily as though confirming my suspicions.

"I know! It happened after the game yesterday. I guess all the ecstasy going on around us was enough to push us together. I mean, the attraction has always been there…"

"You act like you've known him for years. It's only been a week," I interrupted. She ignored my comment and said, "But something is holding him back. It's like he doesn't want to get close. But… I know he would… I'm just going to give him that extra umph he needs to be mine!" After saying so, she clasped her hands together and swooned dreamily.

"Oh… how I love thee… Let me count the ways… one, two, three, four, five…"

"Are you serious? Ew."

"Who's got you all spaced out?" We both looked at Namine, who came from upstairs and heard Rikku's last comment. I felt nervous. I mean, I knew that her and Riku were done with, but… that pain would still be fresh wouldn't it? Her hearing about Rikku and Riku might be like putting peroxide on a fresh cut. Changing the subject, I asked, "So, it's Saturday. What are we gonna do today fam?" Namine grumbled and sat at the table. Mom looked at us excitedly.

"Oooh! It has been a while since all of us have been home together. What should we do?" I didn't mean to get her so hyped. I myself had planned to eat ramen noodles and watch cartoons all day.

"Uh…mom-''

"Oh! Mrs. Trepe! We could go sightseeing and things of that nature since I still don't know my way around here too well yet."

"Oh yea… You did just get here… It's like you've always been apart of the family so it's easy to forget." Namine snickered, but I nodded in agreement with my mother. Rikku blushed sweetly and said, "So it's a go-go then?"

"Of course. I think that would be perfect to see the sights of the island with my family."

"But mother! Sora and I had a date planned!"

"And I wanna get fat by eating all the food while watching cartoons!" My mother clicked her tongue against the top of her mouth and put her hands on her hips.

"Just reschedule your date Namine and Kairi… don't even go there." She continued cooking and Namine grumbled under her breath some more. Rikku smiled happily and I sighed.

"Whatever." So after breakfast, we got dressed. Namine and I had a rough time wrestling our father away from the bed. I guess he planned on sleeping in. What a great idea. He wasn't too keen on having to get up and escort a group of ladies but then he changed his mind with some persuasion from my mother. We piled up in his car and pulled out the driveway.

Rikku had the window seat and so did Namine. I was stuck in the middle. I hated sitting in the middle.

"So… Where do you people wanna go? Any ideas? Any ideas at all?"

"Rufus, stop it. Just drive around for a little while and then we'll let you know if there's anything that catches our eyes," My mother told. I smiled when I heard my dad mutter under his breath, "I was under the impression you had our destination planned out… why else would you wake a sleeping man…? Got me wasting gas to drive around aimlessly…" My mom glared at him but said nothing.

"Oooh! How about we show Rikku the new shopping center? She can buy some souvenirs to take when she goes back home," Namine suggested putting emphasis on the words "back" and "home." Rikku didn't seem to notice, but she nodded and said merrily, "Oooh yea! Shopping!"

"I don't have any objections. How about you Rufus?"

"Do I have to answer that… honestly?"

"You're such a joy killer." I sat back in my seat and decided that it was going to be a long day.

The mall was packed and my dad spent a long time trying to find a parking space. When we finally did find one, it was so far from the entrance that it took just as long as it did getting to the building as it had trying to find a place to park. Rikku was in awe of all the shops and things to buy.

"Ohmigosh! I dunno where to start!" She cried.

"Kairi, Namine, why don't you show her some of your favorite shops? We'll all meet back here at lunch time," my mother said. My dad gave her an incredulous look.

"Are you telling me, this is going to take four hours?"

"Ta-ta girls. Away with you." Namine grabbed my arm and pulled me through the crowd. Rikku followed and I was scared she was going to get lost because she was so small so I grabbed her and pulled her along in the direction Namine was pulling me. My sister had led us to a video game store where I saw Sora's familiar spiky hair. I gulped and tried to hide when Namine finally let me go.

"Hey Sora!" She called. He turned away from what he was doing and grinned.

"Yo!" He walked over to us and said, "So you ditched our date to come here huh?" Namine socked him in the arm.

"Not my fault. Rikku wanted to go sightseeing so my mom made it a 'family outing day'," she explained while glaring at the younger girl.

"Hi Sora!" Rikku greeted friendly, "Is Riku with you?"

"'Fraid not Rikku. Unfortunately, I too have been dragged away to have a family day, after telling my parents that my date had been cancelled. Go figure. But that means that Demyx, isn't here either, Kairi." He practically spit out my name like it had made a foul taste in his mouth. I rolled my eyes.

"I'm not retarded I figured that out a long time ago. Dolt." I couldn't hold in my temper. How dare he get angry? Who was he to get angry for anyway? He frowned and I frowned. We stood glaring at each other. Namine and Rikku exchanged confused looks.

"Oh screw it! Come on Namine," he said pulling her by the arm and taking her away. She looked back at Rikku and me and waved bye.

"That jerk," I hissed icily.

"Uh… I thought you and Sora were friends…"

"Whatever. Come on. If he's having a family outing then that means that Roxas is here and he might know something about Olette. Let us go and search."

"But… I wanna shop."

"Oh come on. There'll be plenty of time to shop. So move it!" I yanked her arm and pulled her through the crowd.

We searched for a good hour and either he had decided to ditch his family, or he was deliberately avoiding us. Rikku started getting pissy about shopping so I gave up and took her to a body wash store. It had other things besides shower gel and lotions, so I thought she might be interested. As she looked at some calming incense, I saw Roxas at a nearby perfume stand. He was checking out the different scents.

"Hold up Rikku. I'll be right back." She shrugged and continued looking and I went over to Roxas. He was holding a cucumber melon scent and I watched as he sniffed it.

"Yea, that's always been one of my favorites too," I claimed. He looked up at me then, but decided I wasn't a big interruption and went back to his perfumes.

"What do you want?" He asked. His tone was bored and I noticed he was picking up random perfume bottles not really looking at them because he was interested. He seemed tired.

"What's up with you?" I questioned. Sighing, Roxas shrugged and put the bottle down that he had in his hand.

"Anyway, you know about Olette right?" I nodded, "Well… she's… she's keeping the baby. She said that she wants to raise it because if she gives it away it might turn out like the father…"

"So… her parents know about the rape and everything then?" Roxas nodded.

"No one's mad at her. Her whole family is supporting her," he claimed. I smiled.

"Yea. She's got a real loving family," I told as I recalled the time I met her grandmother, "Well… that's good. She's not upset at all?"

"No… not that I can tell. She's turning this whole experience into the blessing it's supposed to be."

"I'm glad to hear it… She's still going to be going to school isn't she?"

"Her parents are working that out with the administration."

"Wow… I guess… it's not as bad as it seems…"

"Yea… maybe. For her… I can't… I can't… I mean. Her family is so… I can't become a part of that…" I frowned.

"Who asked you to? It's not your baby." Roxas stopped fiddling with bottles and looked at me.

"No… No it isn't. But Olette… I wanna help Olette… Only… she doesn't need me. It seems like no one does." What was this all of sudden?

"What the hell are you saying? Olette loves you! You're such a doofus. I mean, it's not like Olette's family is the average uppity affluent family. They'd love to have you support Olette. That baby's going to need a father figure anyway."

"What?? I can't be a father… Look at me!"

"You look fine to me Roxas. Just pull yourself together already! If you want to be of some use, then make yourself useful. No one likes a whiner! Man the fuck up Roxas!" Sora's cousin looked at me for a moment before smiling.

"I guess… you're right…"

"No need to guess. I am right." My comment made him laugh and then he didn't look as tired as he had before.

"Now I see why Sora likes you Kairi. You are… I dunno how to put it… nice?" I felt a sharp pain in my heart.

"… He… likes… me…" Duh! Of course! I already knew that. He'd been pretty direct in letting me know it when he kissed me. I guess I hadn't thought it possible since he was with Namine. But now I couldn't argue with the fact that he truly did because he had told his cousin. Roxas gave me a look.

"Don't tell me you didn't know. He's been liking you for a while now. For a looooooong while now." I gave him a look.

"What do you mean? He's been with Namine since middle school."

"Just because you've been with someone for a while, it doesn't mean that you love them necessarily. Some people just like the idea of having someone else by their side and some people just need someone else in order to feel better about themselves." I continued to look at him in perplexity and he sighed in exasperation.

"Okay Kairi. You didn't hear this from me. But, Sora only went with your sister in order to get closer to you. He's always liked you Kairi but he never knew how to go about telling you. I mean, back when you guys were younger, he thought you hated his guts because you were always mean to him. Namine liked him, she was your sister, so she became his link to you. Ya see? Personally, I think my cousin's a dumb ass. He could've said something instead of dragging this shit along, but to each his own." I stood there feeling numb for a while. Could it really be true? Had Sora always liked me? No… it couldn't be… He slept with Namine. He loved Namine right? Right?

"You're…lying," I managed to say. Roxas gave me a look.

"Why would I lie about something like that? I mean, why do you think Riku got away with sleeping with Namine behind Sora's back?"

"I… I… don't believe you…"

"Fine. Ask him yourself. Anyway, I gotta get outta here. See ya later." With a wave, Roxas turned his back on me and left. I stood by the perfume rack, trying to make sense out of my newfound information. Sora… liked me…? He's always liked… me? I gasped. Poor Namine was being used. My sister chose Sora over Riku, but Sora… chose… me? I shook my head in an attempt to get those thoughts out of my mind.

"Hey, Kairi, I'm done here. I want to go somewhere else." I nodded and proceeded to follow Rikku out of the shop.

Rikku took me into other shops that interested her and tried to get my opinions about things she wanted to buy while also talking about some of her purchases. I only half listened to her. The other half of me was preoccupied with that guy and that whole situation. I mean… all that time Riku and Namine slept together and I felt guilty for knowing about it but he was using Namine to get to me. The more I thought about it, the more confusing it got. How could he use her heart that way? He wasn't at all the guy I thought he was. The more I thought about who he wasn't, the more I thought about how lucky I was to be with Demyx. Demyx wasn't playing any games with any one. He was being straight up and he liked me. Only me.

It was noon time and Rikku and I went to meet up with the rest of the family. The Leonharts had joined my parents and I frowned when I saw Sora with Namine. How dare he?

"It's been a while Quistis. How are you doing?"

"I'm fine Rinoa. Work's been rough though…"

"Tell me about it. And then you come home and the boys are all over the place… Why are husbands so irresponsible?"

"I hope you aren't referring to me when you say that," Squall, Sora's father, stated. My mother ignored him when she said, "I don't have that problem. I've got girls remember. They are an entirely different matter."

"Anyway, where you guys headed?"

"We're going to get some food and finish taking Rikku sight seeing."

"Oh, well let us join you. I'm not done catching up." As she said this, Miss Rinoa took my mom by the arm and led her to the exit of the mall. The husbands followed after, mumbling to themselves and then Sora and Namine followed. I watched Sora angrily. As he felt my eyes on him, he turned to look at me and I tried to give him the nastiest look I could muster, which forced him to look away.

We ate at an all- you- can- eat buffet restaurant. My mother was conversing with Miss Rinoa about everything and nothing. My dad even jumped in a couple of discussions but most of the time he was eating. I wasn't really hungry and I let him eat some of the stuff on my plate.

"What's wrong with you Kairi," he asked. I shook my head.

"I had a lotta junk food over at my friend's house the other day and it hasn't really left my system yet…"

"Oh. Well. You're missing out." After that he didn't say anything else but ate. Rikku asked Sora lots of questions about Riku, which I noticed irked Namine a great deal. Well, I rather have her and Riku together then her and Sora. Sora answered friendly enough and Roxas even gave his input. Eventually, Namine interrupted and snippily asked, "What is this? The 411 on Riku or something? Talk about something else already…" Under her breath she added, "Obsessed." Rikku was quiet after that and gave Namine nasty looks throughout lunch. Sora ate like a pig and I kicked him under the table because people started looking.

"Owch!"

"Oh shut-up! I didn't even kick you that hard. You wimp."

"You shouldn't have kicked me at all. Hmph!" He kicked me back.

"Hey!" I tried to kick him back but he had moved his leg and I kicked Roxas.

"Ow! Stop being so damn childish!" He cried. He meant to kick me but he hit Rikku.

"Owies!" She kicked Namine so hard that the table jumped.

"OW!"

"Okay, that is enough children. How about all of you go get us some of that cheese cake they just put out. No fighting," my dad said. All the teenagers got up from the table and I heard Miss Rinoa say, "Wow. Kairi and Sora still go at it like that huh? You'd think they'd grow out of it after all these years…"

"Please. It's just a little unspoken attraction. You know how kids are," my mother answered, "I mean, I used to hate Rufus because he nearly pulled all my hair out with his little crush. They can't help it. It's the hormones." I laughed. Unspoken attraction? Please! When I turned the corner, someone grabbed me and forcefully pushed me up against the wall. At first I thought it was an attacker trying to abduct me, but after I stopped seeing stars, I saw that it was just Sora.

"What's your problem Kairi?"

"I don't have a problem. What's up with you Sora?"

"Nothing."

"Bullshit."

"Fine. I guess… I guess I've been a little messed up since… since…" He looked at me then and I felt butterflies in my stomach. His eyes were so striking. I was captivated by them.

"Sora. Nothing happened. We didn't do anything," I said. My comment seemed to have relieved him.

"That… that bastard! Where in the hell does he get off??" I angrily frowned.

"Where does he get off? How about the real question is, where do you get off? It's none of your business the things I do with my boyfriend. You needn't concern yourself with me."

"Kairi…"

"No, shut-up and let me talk. I know. I mean… I know that you… that you like me. And that you've been liking me for a while. And I know that you're just using Namine to get to me." Sora blushed and he backed away a little.

"Who…who told you that?"

"It doesn't matter! Now that I know it's the truth, how could you Sora? She's my sister and she loves you! How can you just play with her feelings that way!? I can't believe it. You're not at all the person I thought you were…" Sora hung his head in shame. Tears formed in my eyes. I was devastated. Part of me knew that what Roxas told me was true, but the other half didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe that Sora could be so heartless.

"… Kairi. Things changed. I really did start to care for Namine and… and then… You kissed me. I thought it was just a simple crush and that I'd get over it but…" He took one of my hands into his own and I snatched it back.

"Stop it! I'm tired of all these… these games Sora! I don't want to beat around the bush anymore. So tell me. Do you… do you have feelings for me?"

"Yes," his answer came quick and effortless.

"… Were you or are you still using my sister?"

"… Kinda yes and no. I told you. Things have changed. But you tell me now, do you have feelings for me Kairi?" I blushed a little and looked away from his intense gaze.

"Y…yes…" Sora paused and moved closer to me.

"If… if I… if I were to leave Namine… would you leave Demyx and… be with me?" I thought about this. We could be happy and together, but Demyx and Namine would definitely be hurt.

"…No."

"You're lying! If I told Namine I wanted to break up or she broke up with me and your and Demyx's relationship ended, are you telling me you wouldn't want to be with me?"

"How can I be with someone who used my sister like that?? I could never trust you!"

"Oh. You can't trust me, but you can trust Demyx? You don't even know him and… and… Grah!" He punched the wall beside my head and I flinched. He hated Demyx that much? But why? Sora closed what little space there was between us and whispered in my ear, "He's full of shit Kairi. You don't know him like I know him." I frowned and pushed him away.

"I know he wouldn't use me!" Sora grinned.

"Wanna bet?" I frowned and kicked him in the shin.

"No one asked you Sora! No one asked you! If this is who I wanna be with then I'm gonna be with him!"

"But Kairi! You should be with me!" We stopped talking and just stared at each other. Sora sighed.

"Every time I see you two together… it… it pisses me off! You don't know what kind of guy he is Kairi. I'm trying to protect you-''

"I didn't ask for your protection did I? You need to worry about yourself! Just because Demyx was man enough to approach me, you're jealous. You just want me for yourself and so you're just trying to break us up!"

"Listen to yourself! I know I can't force you to be with me but dammit you don't need to be with him! A guy like that is only after one thing!" I sucked in a breath and slapped him.

"And you're no different!" Sora held his offended cheek and his eyebrows furrowed in anger.

"Fine then! Screw it! You're a dumb girl Kairi and I hope you get what's coming to you!" He turned his back on me and walked away. I watched after him feeling my anger subside and sadness take its place.

"Sora!" He stopped walking and looked at me.

"Prove me wrong…," that was all I could manage to say. I didn't want our relationship to end on a bad note like that. I still wanted to believe that Sora was the sweet, caring, gentle boy I thought he was. He smiled and answered, "I won't have to do a thing. Just wait and see for yourself."