Esmeralda, the Ear'Quessir.
Author's Note: AAHHHH!! I'm so excited! basketball starts next week, woo-hoo! Ahem, anyways...that might render my wrting, so i'm hoping that my weekends will be unbusy, so taht I might be able to make up for the coming halt in writing. For you see, vollyball takes up a lot of time, but basketball takes six days out of the week. Which bring sme to my next point, Saturday, I have a playoff volleyball game, which I'm hoping we, lose, wrong, I know, but I'mr eady for basketball, and as long as volleyball goes on, I can't do basketball, Kapeche? I know I spelled that wrong. Anyway, I'm going to try to write as often as I can! I swear, but I don't know how much that will be,. Forgive. My life we pretty much be devoide of anything personal, until sometime in February. And I'm not really looking forward to that. Anyway, enough of that, one to the story! Woot!
Chapter Eleven: Looked Like an L on her forehead.
"Esme, are you going to forgive me or what I've apologized at least a thousand times now!" He's been pestering me like that for the past two hours. But I won't yield, this is what I had to deal with on the way up, so now Legolas has to take a taste of his own medicine...mwuahaha." Don't make me take drastic measures." Legolas said smirking, in a way I didn't like the looks of. I sent him a wary look and inched away from him. Too bad he followed. I kept going, he kept coming, I went, he came, I ran into Gandalf, he stopped. I got yelled at, he laughed. Wanker. I just glared and continued to make the descent, the LONG LONG trek down.
'Esmeeeeee...talk to me! I'm slightly bored." he whined. Now that is something I've never heard, Legolas, whine? As well as complain? Since when?
"Is this like a mile stone? THE first time I've ever heard you complain? E-Gads! what is this world coming too?" I said peering closely at him.
"Finally I knew that would work."
"Harumph." I turned back around and continued on. Stupid loser, who does he think he is?
"Esme, you're being ridiculous! Well, I'm taking drastic measures." I never knew what hit me. All of a sudden he had me pinned on the ground and was tickling the mess out of me, needless to say, I was laughing and flaying my limbs all around. I think I even tripped Boromir. I could hear Legolas and Aragorn laughing. Enough is enough. I took grabbed a hand full of snow, and launched it into the general direction of Legolas' face, bingo. Right in the mouth. He jumped of me to try and remove the snow lodge in his throat, curtsey of me. I jumped up and ran down to the other fellowship member, laughing all the way.
"THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH ME LOSER!!!!" I put my thumb and my finger in the shape of an L on my head and stuck my tongue out at him.
"Are you holding your fingers like that to show how much you adore me?" Legolas asked smirking.
"Heavens no, I'm appalled that you would even think so lowly of me dear Legolas, this symbol stands for LOSER, which you are, not you're name. You've insulted me deeply." I said smirking at his frown. By now the fellowship was laughing at his facial expression. "Surely you didn't think that was the manner of my gesture?" I winked at him and started to walk down the mountain. I could practically feel the embarrassment radiating off of him. I chuckled along with Aragorn who merely shock his head. Ehehe, I'm so nice to that poor elf. Eh, who am I kidding? I think he's been tortured enough with the silent treatment now. I stopped to wait for him, but he never came up to me, when I turned around, he was nowhere to be seen. Now, usually I would think he was just trying to get around me, but something told me to stand my guard. And that's exactly what I shall do.
THWUMP.
I side stepped in perfect time. Just as I had turned back around to continue downward, Legolas came flying off a boulder slightly above me. I could hear him coming so I simply moved letting him fall right into the snow.
"Aha, that's what you get when you're loud master elf." I stepped, lightly of course, on the back of his head and continued on. Only one problem, I couldn't move, Legolas had an iron grip on my foot. I yanked and pulled as hard as I could, but no budge. Finally I started hopping back to smack him so I could get my foot out. Bad idea number two. He grabbed my other foot, and whipped my feet out from under me. So that's where I am now, laying in the snow, with Legolas sprawled out across me laughing at my expression. Which I might add, is murderous.
"That's what you get, Mistress Elf, when you step too heavily with your feet."
"Ahaha, laugh all you want Legolas, after you get off of me that is." He lithely jumped on his feet, and left. That's right, didn't even help me up. The nerve of that guy. I lumped up some snow and lobbed it right at his head, only to have him duck, and the ball hit Gandalf's hat off his head. He slowly turned around and glared at me and Legolas. I quickly pointed in his direction, as he of course, pointed in mine. Gandalf sent us a massive glare, picked his hat up, put it on his head, and continued to walk. We both visibly deflated when we let out the breath we were holding. I looked at Legolas and started laughing at his terrible excuse for a "Gandalf Glare". It was really quite funny. He looked like a fish with squinty eyebrows.
"Whatever is so funny Esme?" questioned Aragorn who looked like he was questioning his sanity for allowing me to come on this mission. Which lead to me laughing harder and Legolas to start laughing too. We walked down the rest of the mountain leaning against each other laughing.
"Ewww...this place is gross!" I said squeamishly stepping over slippery stones covered in gray moss. Since when was moss gray you ask? Since it lives in this place. It's terrible, the walls are dark, dreary, gray stone, and there is one tree, that is, you'll never guess it. Dark, dreary gray. And then there's this gross thing that supposed to be a pond or something, but it doesn't look like it. It looks like tar or something you wouldn't be able to maneuver in. I told this to Legolas, whose reply was, he could throw me in there to test my theory. Snarky little shit. Gandalf is stumped by some stupid doors, that the stupid dwarves made invisible unless there is moonlight. Surprise surprise. Sam has been moaning for about the last hour about having to let Bob, or whatever, go home. Seriously, did he think a horse was gonna make it through there? I'd be more worried about myself actually. Sam merely glared at me when I stated this to Legolas, who agreed with me. Aragorn said that Legolas wasn't helping when he said, whatever that horse's name is, might run into some rogue men to keep him, I merely agreed with Legolas. Aragorn grumbled that we were insufferable.
"Aragorn, I heartily agree with that." said Gimli glaring at the two of us.
"Ahh, take your pipe and stuff it old man." I said glaring down at the dwarf, how dare he insult me.
"That is what I was planning on doing lass, no need to tell me twice." Legolas started to laugh while I stared shocked at what the dwarf had just said. I had been mean, and he thought I was giving him advice?
"I believe, master Gimli, that she meant that in the, meanest, way possible." said Aragorn smirking in my confused direction. Honestly what is this world coming too when people can't realize an insult that openly.
"How so master Aragorn?"
'I believe she meant for you to, how should I say this, take to your pipe and stay there, and stop talking."
"You know, Aragorn I think that is better said than she could have done. Are you sure you have not wanted to say that very thing this whole trip?" smirked Legolas at the now reddening Arargorn. I laughed along with Legolas as Aragorn tried to reclaim the top hand in this situation including a dwarf getting angrier and angrier by the minute.
'Of course not Legolas, what would give you that impression?" he asked through gritted teeth as he sent an apologetic smile towards Gimli.
"No reason at all, you just seem to be trying to start something of my lovely advice I gave to a fellow comrade. Surely you wouldn't be doing that would you?" I smirked as he gave a defeated sigh and walked away. "Props to us for outstanding wit." I bowed to Legolas who returned the gesture, while Gimli, took his pipe and stuffed it.
"What is the elvish word for friend?"
"MELLON!" three voices yelled at Frodo who started and looked around frightened, I started to giggle until Legolas smack my forehead and told me to stop. Or maybe it was to alert me to that fact that the doors were open. Wait. THE DOORS ARE OPEN! I ran into the mines, hearing Legolas chasing after me, only to slip on some unknown substance, and fall flat on my face. Boy did it smell like death in here. I could hear Boromir and Legolas laughing at me. I got up and glared at them.
"And just WHAT is so )&#&$)# funny to you?" I asked making Boromir quell his laughter, Legolas continued to laugh. So I grabbed the nearest rock I could find and prepared to throw it in his face, only, it wasn't a rock. It was a skull. "AIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!" I ended up throwing the skull at him anyways and it hit him the face while I was jumping up and down shaking my hands.
"What is the matter with you girl?" Gandalf asked me glaring in my direction. I just continued to jump and shake my hands.
"She picked up a skull, because she thought it was a rock." said Legolas like it was so easy to tell the difference in the darkness that surrounded us. I glared at Legolas' back for about five minutes, before I saw something slithering in the corner of my eye. And then that same thing grabbed Frodo and yanked him down and started dragging him to the pond. I was the first to react and jumped after it.
"HELLOOOOOO!! YOU GUYS! THERE IS A GRAND THEFT FRODO GOING ON!" I said as I sprinted past Aragorn and Boromir who were merely staring at the big ass tentacle, attached to a big ass octopus. Looked like the Kraken to me. I Jumped into the pond and hacked the first tentacle off only to be grabbed by one myself. It must have known I was the one who had cut it because it started to fling me about, I guess trying to make me even more scatter brained. "WHAT-whoosh-THE-swish-HELL-fwoosh- PUT-whish-ME-Swoosh-DOWN!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"
I Guess it worked, I started falling. Great, now I get to test my theory. I squinted my eyes shut and waited for the splash of icky water I was about to feel, only, it never came. I was being jolted around hitting something soft, yet firm, I guess I landed on the octopus, that smelled strangely good. Who knew the octopus would smell good? I sniffed into it, pines and grass. Wait, there's only one thing I know that smells like this, and it's not an eight legged beastie. I looked up, and sure enough, it was Legolas laughing at me sniffing him. When we reached the mine entrance he put me down and we started sprinting away from the exit, which I don't believe can be considered an exit anymore. The Kraken crushed it. Only then did we stop running, and then Legolas turned towards me, smirking.
"That is the second time I've saved you, and the second time you've smelled my shirt in thanks."
Author's Note:SOOOOOOOOO? How was it? You know the deal. I'll try to update again this weekend...but...I don't know if I'll be able too! I will desperately try. Until the next update, Good day.