Ah, chapter 2. I spent a little too much time on this one I think but I hope you enjoy it. If there are any mistakes let me know.
Being right had never been as un-rewarding as it was now. Why? Because Tenten and Sakura were looking at The Cousin Seducer gearing up to seduce Neji and they suspected it wouldn't be the last time either. They were really just hoping that it wouldn't't end badly; when Ino is upset, people suffer, people called Tenten, Sakura, Hinata and Shikamaru usually.
"And what, exactly, am I doing here?" Shikamaru yawned still trying to decipher the gibberish that Ino had spouted at him while she yanked him rather violently out of the door.
"Listen closely lazy-ass," Ino whispered, looking around to make sure no one was listening in. "We need to bust Hinata out of there and free her-"
"Stop with the melodrama Ino. It isn't that exciting."
"Says you billboard brow," Ino spat back. "I'm the one doing all the hard work!"
Shikamaru and Tenten stood in the background conspiring, whilst Ino and Sakura argued on. It was only after they had argued for more than 5 minutes without an interruption that they figured something was up.
"Anything you'd like to share?" They asked simultaneously, hands on hips, scowling at them.
"New plan!" Tenten smiled, excitement glinting in her eyes. "When Ino rings the doorbell follow me, ok Sakura?"
"Sure thing." Sakura said catching on immediately.
"I'm going to stay by the car; I want no part of this." Shikamaru announced sauntering off.
"And what the hell am I supposed to do?" Ino shouted, flinging her arms in the air.
"Ino," Sakura said, eyes focused intently on her. "Sorry we don't have the costume but since it was your idea..."
"Yeah Ino," Tenten said, nodding her head. "The Cousin Seducer is needed!" Sakura smirked at that last remark and nodded in agreement.
"What!?" Ino yelled, her eyes practically popping out of their sockets. "Why the hell should I do it? It was a joke. 'Ha ha, funny,' you know?"
"Oh, it'll be funny Ino," Sakura said. "Funny for us."
"Why are you encouraging it now?" Ino asked suspicion oozing from her body, eyes fixed intently on her friends. "I mean, last Halloween you pounced on me in my outfit before I could even leave the door and every time before that, when ever I'd bring up my awesome creation you'd hit me! Or just laugh it off..."
Seeing Ino getting more and more worked up, Sakura couldn'thelp but feel sorry for her. She stepped up to her friend and gently guided Ino towards the door, Tenten coming up behind them.
"I really liked that outfit you know and you hate it so much." Ino mumbled still annoyed at the way things had turned out.
"That's because that outfit is hideous," Sakura explained to her, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And I would have thought you'd want people to know that you, Ino Yamanaka, have managed to seduce the ice cube cousin not some idiot in a costume."
As soon as Sakura ended that sentence a smug smile slowly crept onto Ino's face. With Sakura's motivational, if not ego hitting, words to drive her Ino rang the doorbell and waited.
'I can do this,' she thought, anticipation rising. 'I am Ino Yamanaka, The Cousin Seducer.'
The day that alter ego had appeared had been a funny one. They had been enjoying a day off school (without Hinata, of course) and were bored out of their minds.
"If Hinata were here we could sneak into a movie." Ino said offhandedly.
"It sucks that she's the one with all the connections." Tenten sighed.
"Well with a family as big as her she was bound to be our go-to gal." Sakura pointed out.
They all sank back into their bored stupor, sprawled out on the grass hidden amongst a cluster of trees, in their local park, listening to all the pre-schoolers screaming happily with their parents.
"You know what," Ino said suddenly. "Neji needs a girlfriend or a hobby or something."
"He has a hobby," Tenten remarked, almost too bored to form the next words. "Those weapons I have to stare at and 'appreciate' so you guys can sneak by him? They are his hobby, he's a collector."
"Ok then, a better hobby." Ino sprang up and began to stroke an imaginary beard.
"What?" Sakura said, her curiosity getting the better of her.
"You know someone to keep Neji distracted but, not by staring at his boring pointy objects." Ino said.
"So you mean we need to find someone to… what exactly?" Tenten asked knowing she would regret the answer.
"Can we get out of here? I got ants crawling up my skirt; it's irritating." Sakura complained, shifting on the floor and dusting off her legs.
"That's it!" Ino exclaimed loudly.
"What? What's it?" Tenten said exasperatedly.
"We need someone to distract Neji like Kurenai distracts Asuma!" She said enthusiastically, slamming her fist down onto her open palm.
Stunned into silence Tenten and Sakura just got up and walked off, hoping Ino would have enough sense to follow. She did. They relocated to Sakura's house; her mother was out with her father.
"So…" Ino said "What did you think of my idea?"
"What idea?" Sakura replied still curious as to how ants triggered such an outburst
"She want's us to try and get into Neji's pants," Tenten said humorlessly. "You know, as a distraction." She rolled her eyes and shook her head.
"What the hell Ino!" Sakura exclaimed. "Are you insane? We are still kids; I'm not going to have sex with Neji every time we want Hinata to come out."
"Me neither." Tenten added.
Ino stared at the two of them, mouth parted slightly. Sakura thought that she had stopped breathing; she got up and poked her on the forehead. It was then that wheezing could be heard, wheezing coming from Ino. And then the laughter started.
"Eh heh… heh…" Sakura managed, at a loss for true words at the sight of Ino Yamanaka dashing into her bedroom, like the devil himself was chasing her, laughing maniacally.
Then came the sounds of crashing and the occasional curse from Ino. Tenten and Sakura looked at each other; Tenten raised an eyebrow quizzically only to get a shrug that signalled Sakura's ignorance to Ino's moment of apparent madness.
Cautiously the two girls unaffected by the madness crept up to the bedroom door and peeked in. What they saw left them more confused than before and if they were being completely honest a bit frightened too.