yes, another 2 or maybe 3 part story. I know, I shouldn't do those but I can't help it if the chaps get a bit long! anyway, ENJOY!

and btw, I have nothing against Kairi, I just hate the color pink and she, well, represents it.

"WAKEY, WAKEY EVERYONE!!!!!"

Doors opened and members ranging from confused to tired, annoyed and one even furious poked their heads out.

"Dude, what the hell was that?" was the half yawn half groan from Xigbar who was, to the amusement of others, wearing fluffy bunny pj's.

"(snicker) Anyone up for some poker?" Luxord was tossing his cards carelessly and accidentally flicked one towards Xaldin.

"AARRGH! MY EYE!"

"Whoops, sorry, mate"

Six lances appeared out no where, ready to pin Luxord to the wall but a black flash caught everyone's attention.

"WAKEY, WAK- AAAHH!"

CRASH

"THERE'S THE CULPRIT WHO ROBBED MY SLEEP! GET HIM!" The superior shouted and for the first time in their nonexistent lives they followed that direct order. Eight members reached for the cloaked culprit, Xemnas, in his blue with pink hearts bathroom gown, and Axel, hair down and fuzzy because it was missing its usual ton of gel, and Larxene, who was the only one looking reasonable normal, stood back to watch the fight. The hood was pulled off the struggling prisoner, held by six lances against the wall, forced to chew on exploding dice, threatened to be squished by a huge chunk of the floor above, page edges on his wrist ready to make him emo, covered in pink rose petals, drenched in water, his head close to be chopped off by a berserker, feet frozen so he couldn't run(if he got loose) and the most terrifying was the two guns pointing at his head and... his most precious and favorite part of his non-being. Aw, beep this, pointing at his cock. There, now you know how uncomfortable he was. Back to the story: It waaaass...Thunder, lighting and flames encircled the boy before they could see him. But they all knew who it was. Kinda obvious.

"Xigbar! Point that thing elsewhere!" Axel shouted.

"As if! I'm not taking orders from an inferior!"

"Come here, Roxy, it's all good, Larxene's here..." She took the lances and threw them over her shoulder, hitting Demyx with them. The blond boy was carried like a baby by her. Watery puppy dog eyes. Everyone felt sorry for the poor kid.

"Awww, I'm so sorry Roxas! Please forgive me!" Everyone said one after another except Xemnas.

"No. XIII(13)! What the beep was this about anyway?!"

"Why did you say beep, superior?" Asked Sai'x curious.

Xemnas shot him an deadly glare. "Because I'm not in the mood to say fuck. XIII(13), I asked you something, answer!"

Roxas muttered something into Larxene's arms. She held him tightly, poked her tongue out to Axel and went to her room with Roxas, a protesting red head right behind her. She slammed the door in his face, making him fall on his back with a red mark on his forehead. Zexion was the first to realize what was going on with the teen.

"TO THE LIBRARY!" He shouted panicking, pointing in its direction and running off.

"Dude, what's going on here?"

"..."

"Oh god, Lexeaus, you're right!" said Xaldin in horror, agreeing to whatever his friend had said. He started panicking as well, walking off to the kitchens, muttering to himself about how he had to prepare something. Vexen, as the date keeper, hit it as well.

"Please, please don't tell we have to, superior?"

"Ah, of course, that's why he was so hyper. Okay peoples, you know the drill." And they were off.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

An extraordinary sunny and hot day at Destiny Islands. Sora and Riku where lying in the sand, dead. Tidus came over and poked them with his wooden sword. Wakka and Selphie were right behind him.

"Check this out"

"Waddya think they died o', Tidus?" Wakka said, peeking over his friend's shoulder.

"They look a bit dried out." Selphie said, keeping a good distance from the corpses. Suddenly they heard a groan and Sora's head moved, looking at them with a sandy zombie face.

"... w-a-a-t-e-e-r-r-r..." Tidus and Selphie let out a girly squeal.

"THE DEAD ARE ALIVE!!(squeal, you know, the long, high-pitch and very painful one)" The three ran away crying and screaming. Sora's head fell back into the sand. Riku moved a bit to see his dying friend.

"...S-s-o-r-r-a-a-a..."

"...y-y-e-a-a-h..."

"...I... ju-ust wan...ted to ...tell you this... before... we ...die..."

"...what... is it...Riku?"

"...you're... my best... friend ...ever... and..."

"...yeah?..."

"... I ...love... you..."

"... really...?... cause... I love... you... too..."

"... and... as my last... act on this... world..." Riku moved closer to Sora. He reached for the brunettes head and held it in place. He pushed forward to receive a sandy first and last kiss. Then he fell in the sand, ready to die. So did a red Sora. A shadow fell over their faces. Riku opened his eyes, only to see up Kairi's skirt. God that girl needed a change of wardrobe. Even her undies were pink...Hang on, was that a white stain?! God knows what that slut has been up to...a pink shoe came down in an arch and sent Riku flying through the air. He landed in the hot water.

"SORA! OMG, it's a miracle! I found water! AAH! It's hot! Help me, I'm melting!"

"...Ri-k-u... n-no-o..."

"You deserved that, you lazy bum! Anyway, hey Sora, how are you, I'm good, why are you on the ground, guess what, a letter came and we're invited to some party with some old friends, have I told you that you look ridiculous in that black suit or whatever it is, no wonder you sweating like a pig, Riku get out of the water or you'll have burns all over you, look at my new shoes I just bought them, oh look there's Selphie, hey Selphie, how are you, I'm good, why are you hiding there with Tidus, ooh, are you guys finally getting it on, about time Selphie sweets, oops, look at the time, gotta go, Riku get out of the the water, how many times do I have to tell you, I'm not your mother, see you guys around" Kairi said with one breath and then walked away, leaving a little envelope in the sand. It had the nobody symbol on it. Sora picked it up and read out loud.

"Fellow enemies,

Due to the fact that Ekks-mas is drawing near, we, Organization Ekks-Dash-Dash-Dash, would like to-" Sora stopped for a second, looking at the piece of paper in concentration. The fine, clean written words were scrabbled over and there was no way anyone could make out what it was meant to say. Instead there was a small text below, drabbled and barely readable. Sora tried reading it..

"hey duds! wazzup! me an the rest o my gang r throwin a partey, so make sur u come or we ll have2 elimimininat u! it s ekks ma ass so dresup apropityly an bring some-" The word was lined out but Riku was sure it was meant to say 'fukin'. "- presnts!! urs unlovinly cuz we dont got (3s, xiggy"

After a few minutes silence they finally understood.

"PARTY!! Hey Riku, new idea: let's die later and go to that party!"

"That's exactly what I was thinking!" They went to the mall to get some presents and clothes and unfortunately Kairi came with them and made them carry billions of bags. They died right in front of the Castle That Never Was.

Translation for the letter:

"Hey dudes! What's up! Me and the rest of my gang are throwing a party, so make sure you come or we'll have to eliminate you! It's x-mas so dress up appropriately and bring some fucking presents!! Yours unlovingly because we don't have (that thingy that u put on here and a 3, meaning heart) hearts, Xiggy"

THE CHARACTERS OF KH AND KHII ONLY HAVE ONE OUTFIT TO WEAR, THE POOR THINGS. PRESS THE PURPLE BUTTON TO DONATE A NEW PIECE OF CLOTHING TO YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTER. OR TO HELP STEAL THEIR BOXERS-running around with Roxas' boxers in hands, evading flying keyblades-AND DONATE THOSE BOXERS TO RABID FANGIRLS AND BOYS WHO ARE EQUALLY POOR AND STUPID. DONATE NOW AND YOU'LL GET A FREE PAIR FROM YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTER INSTANTLY. BUT BE QUICK BECAUSE ONLY FIRST FIVE GET A FREE SAMPLE! termsandconditionsapply.themakerofthisfanficisnotresponsibleforpeoplesuingyouforstealingtheirboxers.

don't bash me for the yaoi part, it's my first boyxboy I've ever written and it's only there as a joke, I mean, what would you do when you're about to die? anyway tell me how you liked it so I can continue it.