One Drunken Night
Part 4
Right, this hasn't been updated in a while…
Disclaimer: I do not own Tifa or Yuffie, they belong to SE. Akalara belongs to Dantesdarkqueen, the ficverse, Kandi, Ram and Katrina belong to Amazon Turk.
And the bar location this time belongs to Amazon Turk. Yep, its time for a visit to Poison. That is the name right? Right?
Paranoia over. Drunken Shenanigans begin!
The term staggered may have been an appropriate term to use in consideration to the group of women if not for one fact. The fact that at any given moment, anyone of them could kick your ass.
And break every bone in a persons body, etc.
But it did not change the fact that they had consumed enough alcohol each to fell a rhino.
So when they approached the bouncer at poison it took a lot longer to walk in the door, because that required walking in a straight line. Not that the bouncer was a problem, in fact he was very helpful.
"So you two knew each other?" Yuffie asked Kandi.
"He used to be a bouncer at the honey bee inn." Kandi answered.
"You used to work there?" Tifa asked.
"So?" Kandi shot back. It was in the past, it didn't need to be fully brought back up to the surface of he memory.
"Nothing, just I almost had to work for your former boss, he got what was coming to him back then." She pumped her fist before breaking out in laughter remembering what Cloud went through that day. It was worth putting up with the pervert temporarily for that.
Kandi tried to piece the things together. There had been only two major cases of Don Corneo being assaulted. One resulted in his death at the hands of the Turks and Avalanche. The other was on a simple training mission. It was going to be her first assassination, Rude had teamed up with her for that mission only to find that all of his guards bar one had been killed.
"When was that?" Akalara asked.
"Before meteor fall. I had to interrogate him to get some information, so I went in as an applicant. So did Cloud."
"WHAT?" The Turks shouted.
"Yeah, spikey had to cross-dress to get in there and save Teef. Only thing was…"
"…He got picked to be the Don's companion for the night." All of the members of the group collapsed on the floor laughing. The image of Cloud in a dress was too much for them to take.
"Please tell me you have pictures of this…" Katrina gasped.
"They cost a lot of money." Tifa answered in a sing song voice.
"Meany." Ram said in a huff.
Elena was first to her feet and started to walk towards the bar, ordering seven martini's and shoving some of the people at the bar out of the way to make room.
"Saved you girls barstools." She said triumphantly holding up her drink.
"You didn't have to do that for us 'Laney, we could have easily kicked them out ourselves."
"Hey! You stole our spots!" Was the indignant shout from one of the girls who had been moved by Elena.
"Shit happens Barbie. Deal with it."
"Well said that ninja!" Congratulated Kandi. Another one of the girls tried a different tactic, she tried to get the attention of one of the bouncers.
"Hey can you get Blondie, that Green Bitch, her friends and Silicone Sue out please?" A thunderclap was heard, the music stopped playing, a deadly silence filled the air and the glass shattered in Tifa's hand.
"Umm… Turkeys? We should probably move away now." Yuffie whispered, trying to avoid looking at Tifa who was starting to shake a bit.
"Why?" Akalara asked.
"Well… you know what happened to Reno on their first encounter." The Turks nodded their heads in agreement, they had all seen the tapes. "That was because Reno initially thought Tifa's boobs were fake."
"So you're telling us that every time a silicone joke about her is made she goes completely physco?" Tifa was slowly walking over towards the girl who was trying to get them thrown out.
"Yeah, and if someone takes advantage of her sexually. Its like she turns into the incredible Hulk or something."
"No way am I missing this then," Kandi said, looking around to see if there was any popcorn, she had left her jacket at the apartment. "So is it just the person who made the bad call or is it general violence?"
"Depends if someone tries to interfere. Her normal fighting strength combined with her rage is like, seriously scary." Tifa tapped the person who had offended her on the shoulder. And punched her in the face, she went out like a light.
"Got 10 gil that says it turns into a kung-fu movie scene." Ram said as the bouncers tried to calm Tifa down as she was now lifting the poor girl up with one hand.
"You mean where everyone just gets involved but gets there ass kicked?" Akalara asked.
"Yup."
"I hope, your right," a third person that Elena had sent off the stools was finally standing up, directly in the Turk's line of vision. Akalara kicked her in the back of the head, sending her straight back down. "Don't make me miss any of this."
---
The seven women left the club moments before the fire engines arrived, none of them had a scratch. Although Tifa had managed to take out half
"Okay that's the second time we've set that place on fire and Tifa is over her berserk phase. Where to next?" Akalara asked.
"Karaoke!" Yuffie shouted.
"Why not? If they don't like our singing we shoot them." Kandi said in a laid back manner.
"Do we have to?" Ram groaned.
"Come on, we've got in a bar brawl, castrated a bartender. Yuffie dropped a shuriken in someone's drink, Katrina and Yuffie have played human dominos, what else can happen tonight?" Akalara asked.
"We could end up having an orgy?" Yuffie pondered.
"Gross!"
I may be a slight bit evil (mwa-ha-ha!). Reviews and suggestions are greatly appreciated. I lost count of the number of bars they were supposed to go to but who cares? More humour.