...keeping you from your very soul.
I must find a place to hide
Creeping, creeping, creeping. A hidden shadow.
A place for me to hide
Swirl.
Zim coughed, "I guess I torture myself, huh?"
Dib blinked in surprise at the mature tone in his voice. "Maybe. We all do that sometimes."
Violent swirls...
Can you find me soft asylum
... Is this our final ring?
I can't make it anymore
Don't, Don't, Don't... PLEASE!!!!!
The Man is at the door
Point and...
Laugh, laugh, laugh
Swirl.
All our lives we sweat and save
Building for a shallow grave
Wheeze... "You only lied to yourself, Mariko." Membrane spoke softly, sadly... in strange, horrible irony. "But the only real lie... was me." Whisper.
Must be something else we say
Somehow to defend this place
"I'd never. Never, never, never..."
Everything must be this way
Everything must be this way
Luminous.
I must find a place to hide
Sweat, tears... blood... screams
"Nothing can keep us apart."
Swirl...!
"My mother... she.. dad said she couldn't take it, whatever it was... I was so young. I just heard bits and pieces." He rambled, shutting his eyes tightly briefly, trying to remember.
A place for me to hide
"What was it?" Zim inquired, nervous... dreading to hear... something he wasn't ready for.
"I heard... he said something to my mother." He leaned forward, his eyes trembling. "I've never... told this to anyone before..."
Zim was quiet.
"I heard dad say to mom... 'Their not really yours, Mariko... their not really ours,' ... I don't remember anymore, I can't, but ever since then, it's haunted me..."
"What?! What does that mean?!" Zim gasped.
Dib shook his head. "All I heard next was screaming... yelling... Zim," His eyes teared up slightly, wavering, pleading as though he wouldn't, couldn't say anymore.
Zim took Dib's hand, almost like a involuntary reach. Dib took in a deep yet shallow breath.
"I saw... I saw my mother die... I co-couldn't save her!"
Zim looked at Dib unfathomably.
"I didn't know where ... her inhaler was. And I tried to call for dad... he wasn't there.."
"Dib... its not your fault!" He exclaimed, though... he really didn't understand. He didn't think Dib really understood either.
"He wasn't there... but then again, he's never really been there.." Swirls. Echo.
"You can't blame yourself..."
"I try not to... but I felt totally responsible for Gaz. Dad became so distant from us... and Gaz, she was so shocked by everything she just shut down... she's... oh!" He lit up for a second.
"I also heard... I also heard..."
"Yeah...?" Zim was already almost in tears, everything about Dib's speech was so... intense and surreal.
"It was something like, 'I implan.. gave you those memories, so.. you would love them as they were your own... and you have.' and my father, no... he can't be my real father, can he? No! And... what if I'm just a sick joke to him, and Gaz.. what if she?!... He.. he killed my mother!!!" Dib gasped... seemingly piecing together his tattered past. Sobs. "He must've!" He cried. "That smoke... she...!"
Zim trembled. "Dib! Please.. calm down, please.."
"NO! This is like some sick dream..." He sobbed. "Bu-but I can ne-never wak-wake u...up."
Zim looked upon Dib with a quiet sadness, a love. Zim leaned forward and held him tightly.
"Please Dib... please don't cry.. I'm here... I'm here."
A place for me to hide
hide, hide, hide...
Ssssswirl.
Awake. Crimson eyes open in a frenzied, delirious state.
"Dib..." He cried softly.
I can't make it anymore
A soft, familiar tune hummed, resounding... ominously through his soul.
The Sky is Crying.
Swirl.
"How did I ever ..."
I can't make it anymore
"How did I ever come to love you so much?"
The Man is at... the door
(A/n: The lyrics, from this brilliant song, are not mine, they are Jim Morrison's, The Doors. The song is The Soft Parade. I would strongly recommend listening to it. Oh and this chapter might be really confusing, but it does shed some light on Dib's mother... and I would also take into account that there's many things in here that have double-meanings. There's only a few more chapters left.) This Chapter: A Place to Hide