Hello, dear readers, and welcome to chapter three. I'm trying to switch POVs from chapter to chapter. Well, actually, that wasn't my original intention but that's the way it's kinda turning out.

Joker time! Yay! This is the first time I've really tried to get into his head. Not the easiest of things. Everyone who can do this with style gets so much admiration and applause from me.

Standard disclaimer still applies!

The Joker had a week in solitary confinement to muse upon the best course of action with the new intern. This sort of thing could be tricky. The first problem, of course, was that she could be easily assigned to a different person. Sure, the intern would want to be assigned to the Joker – everybody did, after all – but it was rarely an intern's choice.

The Plan had popped into his mind early in the week, inspired simply by the fact that she was female. He had dismissed it. The Plan, however, refused to leave him alone, and bounced back into his brain at least once a day, disturbing the creation of other, more realistic plans.

Sure, The Plan was a good plan. All of his plans were good plans. In fact it was a stroke of genius, if he did say so himself. It would give the intern more reason to want him, and only him, as a patient, and it would be a fantastically amusing way to destroy her.

All the same, it made him feel very slightly uneasy.

He had to make her fall in love with him.

Of course, this would be simplicity itself. He was stunningly attractive, effortlessly charming, and more fun and excitement than a day at the fair. The hard part would be to ensure that the intern set aside all common sense and dismissed the warnings of her superiors. The hard part was making sure she wasn't scared off or told anyone about it.

And then, when she was totally, completely, absolutely and passionately in love with him, the façade would be dropped. He would torment her, torture her, and terrify her. (He was rather pleased with the alliteration involved.) She, heart-broken and driven to the brink of madness, would kill herself.

It was beautiful. It was fun. It was the perfect plan.

Several things worked in his favour here. Firstly, any intern managing to score a place at Arkham would be ambitious and highly motivated, so she would be naturally driven to him anyway. The passion and determination usually focused on work could be re-directed to their relationship. Second, he was the most high-profile criminal in Gotham, the Clown Prince of Crime himself. All he had to do would be to hint that he would divulge all his secrets, perhaps imply that she could write a book, and she would do anything win him as a patient. If he was clever, the senior psychiatrists might even push her towards him, thinking perhaps she could do more than they could to cure him.

The Plan was perfect. It was without flaw.

Still, his week was almost up before he resigned himself to The Plan. Yes, it was the most likely to work. Yes, it would be the most fun. And yet, "love" wasn't a realm that the Joker had complete control over. It was peanuts to get any woman to fawn at his feet, true, but any fool knew that women could be trouble. Anyway, relationships weren't exactly his forte. He tended to get annoyed at the girl for something and then shoot her in the head. It was very important that he didn't lose patience with the intern early on.

He was released and taken back to the normal high security area a day before she was supposed to start work. He had a day, therefore, to glean what more information he could about her and truly perfect The Plan.

Somebody had leaked the information to the masses. They had apparently known about it only for a day or so, because it was still the hot topic and discussed at every corner. The Joker set about garnering what extra information he could without having to actually overtly ask someone about her.

Unfortunately, he was beginning to think he was going mad. He kept hearing the word "harlequin" at the edges of his hearing. Perhaps the Riddler was trying to get him back for the arm-breaking incident, telling people to go around murmuring "harlequin" just to drive him mad. It was really distracting, and he was finding it a bit more difficult to concentrate on the task at hand.

It was near the end of his free time in the day-room when he finally discovered the intern's name. Two inmates were discussing "that new doctor, Harleen Quinzel".

Harleen Quinzel. He blinked. Surely not…

Harlequin?

He burst into gales of laughter; he had to be sedated and restrained before being quickly returned to his cell.

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The Joker woke the next morning with a smile on his face. This wasn't at all unusual, but the day in question certainly was. It was a day that came with a brand spanking new intern.

A brand spanking new intern called Harley Quinn.

The Joker giggled to himself. He had already mentally renamed her, and took great delight in the name. What would she be like? The guards had thought her attractive, but then they didn't have the greatest taste.

He hummed cheerfully to himself as he brushed his thick green hair. With any luck, Dr. Harlequin would get a guided tour of the asylum, including the Rogue's Gallery. He chuckled nastily.

The high security wing all woke early. Excitement was palpable in the air, heightening the Joker's sense of anticipation. Villains yelled across the hall at one another, hooting and laughing. The Mad Hatter's voice rang out, berating someone for their rudeness. There was more laughter, and a couple of mocking shouts.

Suddenly conversation stopped completely. In the distance a guard's voice was heard, answered by a voice the Joker recognised as that of Dr. Leland. A thrill ran through him and he leant against the back wall of his cell, whistling a bright and cheery tune, a favourite that he liked to think of as his personal theme song.

The distant voices grew nearer. His fellow inmates were muttering quietly to themselves, only the occasional voice rising enough to be audible.

He could hear the footfalls of Leland and the intern. Could she hear him whistling? One set of footfalls stopped, but the other came on, closer and closer. When they stopped again, he looked up.

A shock ran through him, one he didn't expect. He could feel the life within her as she stood outside the glass, staring through at him. Transfixed. He stared back for a split second before he remembered himself and grinned at her.

She didn't look frightened. He was half-expecting her to be afraid.

Hmm. Good girl. He favoured her with a cheeky wink, and was rewarded: she blushed slightly, and ducked her head in an attempt to hide the smile that he saw tugging at the corners of her lips.

His grin widened. The Plan was off to a flying start. It was clear that she was attracted to him, and was barely even trying to resist the sensation.

Leland caught up to her charge and started to guide her away. The Joker kept his gaze on his new intern, grin wide. She looked back over her shoulder at him as she was led away down the hall.

The Joker stood leaning against the wall for a long time, trying to reconcile the girl's appearance with the sensations he had experienced upon seeing her.

She had looked… restrained. The most restrained person he had ever set eyes on. Tight skirt, like a straight-jacket for her legs. Professional-issue high heeled shoes. Flattering lab-coat over a collared shirt, buttoned high at her throat. Necktie, perfectly straight. Blonde hair, that would look so pretty flowing over her shoulders, was instead pulled up into a stern bun at the back of her neck.

He could remember every detail, and each one conflicted glaringly with the impression he had of her as a person. She had passion. She was alive, alive in a way few people really were. He saw it in her eyes: a fire lay banked there, almost extinguished by years in the professional world. How satisfying it would be to rip her hair out of that bun…

The Joker pushed the thoughts aside. That wasn't according to The Plan. Still, the girl's nature would make The Plan all that much easier: she was a Real Person, that one. A living person. And if he could shake Society's hold on her and make her laugh when nobody else could, he knew she would be his.

And she had blushed. His grin widened. This would be easier than he thought.

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It was a well-known fact: girls liked roses. And he knew just where to get one.

Sneaking out of the day-room wasn't an easy task, but the Joker was very practiced at it. Sneaking into Poison Ivy's cell was easy: it was left open when its resident was spending time elsewhere. The lanky man slunk into the room, staying in the heavy shadows, and found the roses without too much trouble. Red, pink and white flowers were in bloom, but the choice was an easy one. Red, obviously. The flower he chose was just beginning to open, and would last.

He snipped the rose carefully and slunk back out of the room, pausing to steal a small, thin vase that stood unused. Pam wouldn't cut flowers for display; she must have used the thing for nursing plant cuttings or something. Who cared? She wouldn't miss it, especially with a flower missing. The Joker grinned to himself at the thought of her rage when she discovered one of her babies was missing a flower.

Getting it into Dr. Harlequin's office was a little more difficult, but it was lunchtime and those who weren't on their break were fairly relaxed, not expecting any trouble in full daylight.

Her office was… messy. Apparently the last "inmate" hadn't cleaned the room before he left, and piles of papers and folders sat un-filed on the floor. Still, the desk was clear, ready for its new occupant. The Joker poked around for a few minutes, but apparently his intern hadn't had the chance to make the room her own yet. The only evidence that she had even been there was the university degree that sat propped up against the wall, ready for hanging.

The rose went into the vase, filled with water from the water-cooler, and he hunted around for a notepad. He scratched out a quick accompanying note and slipped it around the neck of the vase.

Come down and see me some time – J.

Expect another update sooner rather than later. I'm still three chapters ahead. (Although given the difficult terrain that I will soon have to traverse, progress may slow slightly.)