Chapter 19 – In which it is revealed to the gaping public that Root is, in fact, very much alive.
"You're not alive!"
Welcoming. Real welcoming.
Root's grin morphed into its usual form, which was a relief for all those present. After all, being informed that your mind had been wiped and one of the only remotely human people within the company had been taken into another dimension was bad enough.
"Well, I don't feel dead yet, and why is it that everyone who sees me now automatically say that I am not alive?" Demanded Root, only to be stared at more by Vinyaya. It wasn't everyday that your old crush turned up from the dead, after all.
"Maybe because we already buried you about three months ago? Maybe that was the reason?" Demanded the Wing Commander, jabbing her finger at Root for every emphasised word.
The former commander took an unconscious step back for each jab made, despite being the legendary Commander Julius Root, who could stare down a troll if he felt like it.
Then again, if he did feel like it, his officers would probably have to check him into the Haven insane ward – only those who are insane would try to have a staring match with a troll. Although having a staring match with Vinyaya came very, very close to just that.
"Now come on, Vinyaya, all I did was have a few months up on the surface, you can't exactly blame me…"
The argument that followed made by the petite, delicate looking elf who could give Holly a match in core diving was immense. All the occupants of the room, having full access to speaking Gnommish, were shocked and rather impressed by the long flow of swear words that came pouring out of that mouth. Artemis immediately started to time the entire incident, a hundred and twenty-three, a hundred and twenty-four…
He had reached two hundred and ninety-eight by the time Foaly thought that enough was enough, and once again, for the second time that day, stepped between two significantly smaller beings using his flank as a block. It was, once again, quite effective.
And painful to boot.
"Okay, this is not the time to start fighting, okay? And no verbal abuse, either. What we need to focus on right now is…"
The centaur was cut short by a sudden head butt from Vinyaya, leaving the LEP consultant gasping for breath. This was not how things were meant to go…
Of course, if you knew Root, this was about as emotional as anyone was going to get. Hysterics, hugging and tears were rarely on the ex-commander's schedule, but he was willing to forego the timetable this once.
The reunion would have been a lot more effective… if the ceiling hadn't started to crumble at that moment.
"Everyone, get under a table!" Vinyaya yelled, diving head-first under the large Council conference table. After casting some nervous looks towards the ceiling, the room's other occupants scrambled under some sort of cover as well.
Which was just as well, seeing as that moment was when a piece of the ornate ceiling design decided that it liked the floor better than the ceiling and promptly smashed onto the floor.
With not an insignificant loud crashing sound.
Vinyaya shakily explained that this had been happening for quite a while now, and the only places not affected across Haven were the places with stability bearings, Foaly's latest (and so far private) patent.
Which also meant that the Ops Booth was the only building not shaking to its foundations.
"There's been an emergency evacuation announced, but then we all got replies from various people claiming that it was just a quickie, like all the others." Seeing Artemis's confused look, the fairy wing commander explained, "A 'quickie' is a slight disturbance from the surface, causing…"
No further explanation was needed. Action was what mattered right now, and nothing else. Root crossed the room on his hands and knees, reaching the cabinet and pulling out a drawer with 'R-U' on it. Dragging the entire thing over to the make-shift shelter of the Council conference table, flicking through the documents.
"Okay, Vinyaya, there is no time for any kind of hysterics right now, because we are in a crisis situation right now. Later on, I will fill you in on all of the interesting little things like how I'm alive and so on, but not right now. Right now, I need you to make me alive again."
A speculative look clouded the Wing Commander's face, "Er… do you mean that like last time or do you mean it…"
Root's face got hotter as the gazes, most of them sceptical, more than one of them mocking him, turned upon him. He managed to get a spluttered, 'No!' out, and then returned to spluttering.
Foaly smirked,
"Ah, so that was who you were writing so many poems to…"
"That is not the point right now, Foaly!" Root yelled, suddenly glad that in all the confusion nobody could quite make out his face colour. He had a nasty feeling that a faint pink had come in and replaced his usual hue. "The point is to get me legally alive again, kick out Sool, and reinstate me as Commander!"
Vinyaya and Foaly looked at Root, then at Trouble, then at each other. Shrugging, they separated the two fairies, and proceeded with a story that was best summed up by these words:
"Trouble, you're going to be the second officer to be promoted and demoted in under a day."
The first, you ask? Where have you been living, under a stone?
Root's reaction was, of course, predictable. Even Artemis, for all that he had only known Root for under six years compared to Vinyaya's six decades, tried to protect his ears as Root's yell rivalled that of the earthquake's rumbles up above,
"WHAT!"
It would almost have been comical, if only that yell hadn't dislodged another piece of the ceiling.
"You do, in fact, owe us all an explanation for the ritual you just performed." Artemis drawled, determined to beat this new girl. How she managed to have a tongue so sharp was beyond his understanding.
"No, in fact, I do not." Smirked Ivy, her back still straight as ever, despite the comatose state, "I reason this, because I think that you've already worked out who I am, and where I want to go."
Fowl shrugged. Genius was a burden.
"Naturally, Kestrel, naturally. After all, I would be a poor analyst if I could not read even you."
Ivy suppressed the overwhelming desire to roll her eyes, then punch this arrogant teenager. Was this how Artemis would have turned out, had he never had the influence of the People in the first place?
Ivy then turned to the next important matter at hand, "Where is Mother, Duke Kestrel?"
The duke was taken aback by the cold, hard indifference in the girl's voice. It was as if she did not allow herself to feel emotions, much like the Fowl boy, the Keeper of the Balance…
Kestrel Senior sighed resignedly. This scene was not going to be pretty.
"I think that you two had better come with me, there are some things that you need to see personally."
Melissa Kestrel's heart rate was steady, and her vital statistics were normal. All in all, she was the very soul of health. However, her closed eyes and pale complexion seemed to state otherwise.
"She's been this way ever since you two appeared out of nowhere, right here in the mansion. You were showing signs of consciousness, tossing, muttering, and so forth. However, as you can see here, your mother is not showing any sign of movement, physical," Fowl motioned to the unmoving body, "or otherwise." He gestured towards the brainwave-reader, where even the dream spikes were completely flat.
Ivy nodded, then frowned. This was unusual, seeing as last time they supposedly skipped dimensions, Melissa was still conscious. According to Foaly, anyway. Then again, knowing Foaly, you couldn't really trust everything he told you.
"According to a… consultant of mine, my mother was perfectly fine when she stepped through his own dimension traveller. Whether this is due to the fact that I was not part of her during the transaction this time, or not, I cannot know until someone revives her."
"Was that an indirect request, or a hint?" Artemis Fowl was stepping lightly around this subject now. It was a delicate area.
"What's the difference?" Retorted the youngest Kestrel, and swept out of the room. Fowl had a sneaking suspicion that she was going to have to take a rather unorthodox method of exiting the building. Unless she found a way of getting past five regular patrols without being seen and dragged kicking and screaming back into the mansion.
And, as always, he was correct.
I know that I'm giving Fowl satisfaction, and I don't care. I need the fresh air, thought Ivy, dangling from a tree branch before swinging herself onto it. And I also need to acquaint myself with the element's representatives around here… maybe they can help me get back.
Opening a small door that she had constructed in the walls that she had erected against her mother, she invited in the elements into her mind.
Once again, the sensations of freedom, burning, electricity, wholeness and indifference flooded her and threatened to overwhelm her. I am in control… I am the one who is planted firmly on this world… she decided to ignore the fact that she was also flesh and bone, and definitely more breakable than any of the elements.
Why dost thou call us, Chosen one of Water?
Artemis was still pondering whether or not to start damaging the ex-commander's mind, although there wouldn't have been too much difference, not with the number of beings, human and non-human, holding the old veteran down.
"What's so bad about Trouble being the commander, Julius?" Yelled Mulch, causing another tile to come smashing down, "It's not as if you could have made a better choice…"
"THAT IS NOT WHAT IS SO BAD! What is so bad is that I don't actually want to make him step down!" At least his complexion has gone down to ruddy and not tomato anymore, thanked Artemis, restraining Root by the arm.
The screaming wasn't so bad, right up until Kelp offered to step down for Root. Then the old commander lost it completely. Shouting some rather obscure things that raised the question of the differences between boys and girls, Artemis promised himself not to be tempted to look these up in the Book. That would not be the wisest thing ever to do. Especially since Butler could also read it, if not speak it.
Root took control over himself again. Which, all things taken into account, was still not that considerate.
"I refuse to let Kelp step down. I don't care, as long as he doesn't make me…" Here, the meaning was so obscure, that even Artemis was unable to make out what they were saying. In fact, if I tried to translate the following text would be slightly obscure, and you may just misunderstand the entire situation.
Frond knows that Artemis misunderstood. It's a culture thing, trust me.
And that was when Vinyaya dropped the second bombshell of the day (figuratively speaking, of course)…
"Er… Julius…"
"What?" Asked Root, his eyes shining, from excitement or tears, no one could tell (and no one dared to ask, either). Vinyaya backed away slightly, causing Root to narrow his eyes suspiciously, "Is there something else that you've all neglected to tell me?"
"Oh, not much, just that… seeing as you're now alive, and as soon as that's officiated…"
"Yes, come on, spit it out…"
"Well, it means that you are, technically, in the running for a Council seat again…"
Artemis and Holly looked at each other for a few seconds, then counted under their breaths, three, two, one…
"Holy FROND!"
Another piece of the ceiling crashed down.
A/N: Ah! My computer is refusing to let me break properly, so I am being forced to use underlined spaces (I hate doing that...)
Anyway... read and review, people, it's not that much of an effort. One or two words - very good, good, bad or worse?
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