Author's Note: So the Montez/Alman/Evans saga has kind of put all Troypay and Ryella action on the backburner. I thought it would be good to focus on the grown-ups for a while, to give another facet to the story. But after this we shall return to East High and our Wildcats.

There are a few more La Lohan references that somehow found their way into here.

Disclaimer: I don't (yawn) own…High…School…(snore)…

Chapter 13

The Unhappy Meal

Sharpay

"My hair dye must be leaking into your brain if you think I'll let you ruin this for her."

"You can't ruin something that isn't there."

"Oh, come on! Look at them. They're totally into each other. They're acting like…teenagers."

"I know. It's sickening."

Sharpay groaned and pushed her hands through Gabbie's curly dark locks. Sharpay as Gabriella, Gabriella as Sharpay, Marie, Ronnie and Kim sat around the dining room table. 'The Hedlunds' glanced at the two whispering girls and then looked at each other. This was going to be an extremely awkward afternoon. And it had started so well…

"I can't believe you make empanadas," said Mrs. Montez, folding over a pastry patty carefully. The kitchen and dining area were linked by a large square window in the wall, complete with shutters, so they had a view of the culinary display being put on. "Gabbie loves them."

"Oh, so does Pay-pay!" Mrs. Evans piped up. She was leaning against the counter, drumming her nails on its surface while the two other adults cooked.

Shar rolled her eyes. She knew exactly why Gabbie had brought her mother. It was just like her to jump at the first broad-shouldered male she saw. The woman had even removed her wedding band!

Now, Sharpay loved her mum, truly she did, but sometimes she just wanted to wallop her across the face with a frying pan.

"It is so rare that you find a man who can cook," she gushed, watching him intently.

Mr. Alman gave a small, brief smile. "Believe it or not there was a time when I couldn't boil water without setting the kitchen on fire. But I had to learn how to do everything after my wife died."

Mrs. Evans looked puzzled. "Why didn't you just hire a cook? Or a nanny?"

"Pay somebody to look after my own kid?"

Sharpay gave the Gabriella in her body a deliberate look. Gabbie chose not to react and turned to Kim, gushing that she loved the color of her hair.

"Well, it worked for Ryan and Sharpay," Mrs. Evans continued, not realizing she was taking the wrong approach. "They obviously don't need a nanny anymore. But Idina- our cook- is so useful to have around the house."

"Like a vacuum cleaner," Mrs. Montez muttered as she concentrated on her carrots.

Mr. Alman pursed his lips into a smile and shook his head slightly over the ingredients bowl.

Sharpay couldn't watch anymore. It was too embarrassing. She would have to take her mum aside when she got a chance and instill some sense into her. She glanced at Gabbie, and then the glance turned into a stare. What was she smiling at?

"Is it just me," Ronnie murmured when Gabbie and Kim's fascinating follicle discussion died out, "or are those two crushing on your dad?"

Sharpay, Gabbie and Marie simultaneously turned red. This. Was. A. Nightmare.

Gabriella

This was turning out to be a really bad idea. Mr. Alman was totally rebuffing Mrs. Evans. That could only mean one thing. He actually liked her mother. Urgh.

What the heck was she going to do now? Lola was getting all googly-eyed just because he was a sad widower who knew how to cook Gabbie's all time favorite food.

She needed another course of action. But her brain was starting to hurt from all this scheming. Maybe she was getting a little too into being Sharpay.

The Sharpay in her body gave her a pointed look just then. What? Was Gabbie supposed to be impressed, just because Mr. Alman said something gallant and heartfelt about not wanting to hire a nanny?

This was too much! She needed…a cuddle, that's what she needed. A cuddle from…Ryan? Yes. Ryan. But only because Troy was currently unavailable. Ryan gave good cuddles. She found herself hugging him goodnight once. It felt…warm? Yes. That was the word. Warm, safe, sweet. She felt his heart beating against her own, and he kind of smelled like cinammon buns.

If Ryan were there, she mused, he would give her one of his cinammon bun hugs, and kiss her head and tell her not to worry because she'd get lines. She smiled to herself.

"Is it just me or are those two crushing on your dad?"

Gabriella as Sharpay's face fell and she found herself glaring into the kitchen again. Focus! She needed to focus. What could she do to get those two away from each other?

She turned to look at Marie, the doe-eyed blonde. Surely she was as uncomfortable with this as Gabbie? Maybe they could collaborate. Like the Parent Trap in reverse.

Suddenly inspired, Gabriella smiled across the table at her. It was a shame their respective parents weren't going to get together. She was actually a really cool girl.

"Lunch is served, ladies," Mr. Alman called.

Sharpay

Sharpay was officially ready to leave, even if it meant dragging Mrs. Montez with her.

At this point in time Mrs. Evans was not Sharpay's mother, but that did not make her behavior any less cringe-worthy. It wasn't the fact that she was being so overtly coquettish, it was simply that she was repeatedly snubbed, yet kept going back for more. This was most likely because she was not used to being denied. She probably didn't even realize he was actually into Mrs. Montez.

Sweet jelly beans, she needed Troy! He had such receptive ears, perfect for her bitching sessions. And he always knew some corny joke that would take all the weight off her shoulders. How was she going to cope without him as her boyfriend, or even her friend?

She sighed internally. Well, she would just have to deal with it when she and Gabriella switched back. If they switched back…

Sharpay looked up from her half-eaten empanada. Mrs. Evans was excusing herself from the kitchen counter, asking where the bathroom was. With great reluctance she chose to abandon her food.

"I'll show you where it is…Mrs. Evans!"

Everyone gave her a quizzical look before silently accepting her convenient gesture. Together they made their way to the bathroom.

Sharpay stood patiently while Mrs. Evans spent ten minutes touching up her lipstick. She knew her mother was doing this because she never asked to go to the bathroom simply to use the bathroom. It was always to make sure her make-up was perfect and to practice which posture would make her look leaner.

The door opened and sure enough, her cherry smile glimmered brighter than before.

"I can find my way back fine, thank you," she said with stiff sweetness. "You didn't have to wait for me."

Sharpay sighed. "Oh yes, I did. Moth- Mrs. Evans…you're making a fool of yourself."

Her smile dropped completely. "Excuse me?"

She crossed her arms. "Well, you see, Mr. Alman is only interested in one woman, and that's my mum."

Mrs. Evans settled a hand on her hip and leaned back in her classic defensive stance.

"Well, aren't you the little matchmaker? Listen, dear…" She narrowed her eyes. "This would've been cute were you a ten-year-old with red hair and freckles. But since you're not, I'll have to tell you honestly…stay out of other people's business. Mr. Alman can decide all by himself who he's interested in."

"You're married."

She smiled condescendingly. "That doesn't count for much these days, sweetie. Keep up with the times."

She patted her cheek and strolled off. Sharpay shook her head. It was hopeless.

Gabriella

"Thank you so much for lunch, Michael," said Mrs. Evans. "The girls seem far too stuffed to plan anything today so I think I'll just take Pay-Pay home now."

Gabriella was more than ready to go. She actually felt guilty for dragging Sharpay's mum into this. Then again, wasn't she just returning the favor?

While Mrs. Evans said her goodbyes, Gabriella stood.

"Thanks for having me, you guys," she trilled, smoothing down her pink blouse efficiently. "This was a great way for us to establish a strong working relationship. Don't you think?"

The Hedlunds all nodded slowly and silently.

"See you around, Sharpay," said Ronnie.

"Yeah. See you," said Kim.

She smiled. Now was as good a time as any to corner Marie. "Marie, can I talk to you real quick before we go?" She gestured to the far-end of the dining-room.

"Uh…sure."

They moved into a corner of the room, which probably wasn't the best idea because now they had to huddle there, whispering like idiots.

Gabriella decided to get straight to it. "I think Mrs. Montez likes your dad."

Marie glanced at who she thought to be Gabriella. "Well uh…that's good because I know my dad likes Mrs. Montez. I'm lucky if I go a whole day without hearing her name."

Gabbie nodded sympathetically. "It bugs you, doesn't it?"

She shrugged. "Not really. She makes him all smiley. And when he's smiley I'm smiley. He works so hard to give me a good life. I just wanna see him happy, you know?"

Gabbie hesitated. This was not the reaction she was hoping for. And now she was starting to question herself. Did Mr. Alman make her mum all smiley? She couldn't really tell. Her mum was always smiling.

"Yeah. I know."

Marie nodded awkwardly, surely wondering why on earth this girl was so involved in the relationship of somebody else's parents. She had not painted a very good picture of Sharpay. But she couldn't really feel bad about that.

"Time to go, Sharpay. We don't want to be late for our yoga appointment."

Mrs. Evans, Mrs. Montez and Mr. Alman were drifting through the dining-room, into the living-room and out the front door. Gabriella rolled her eyes, an action which made Marie chuckle a little, and they followed out onto the porch.

Before the Sharpay in Gabbie's body rejoined her mother, she went over to Mrs. Evans in the most random manner possible and dragged her into a fierce hug. Mrs. Evans simply stood with her hands raised in alarm.

"I'll miss you," she murmured.

Mrs. Evans, clueless to the fact that this was her daughter, smiled weakly. "How…nice."

Gabriella proceeded to take Sharpay by the arm and drag her away, down the porch steps.

"Hey!" she hissed, waving back to the girls. "Can't a girl hug her own mother?"

"She's not your mother, remember?" Gabriella murmured through her smile. "You're making me look crazy."

"Just returning the favor."

They stood, glaring at each other in the driveway, before finally parting ways and marching to their respective cars.

"And, Sharpay!" Gabriella barely hesitated before turning back. It was kind of scary how used to the name she was getting. The Sharpay in her body leered at her. "It's called being friendly! You should try it."

Gabriella shot her a fierce look.

Getting back in her body was officially at the top of her to-do list.

A/N: I myself have never had empanadas. But they sound really good so I figured Gabbie would like them!

And although it is quite sweet for a dad to double as a mum, it's really inconvenient to not have a nanny when you're working. So for anyone who's interested (anyone? Anyone at all?) Mr. Alman gets his sister to pick Marie up from school, and she spends the afternoons there when he's really busy. It's a bit of a hassle considering his sister has kids of her own that don't go to East High, but she's a really cool chick.

I think you can tell that I like making people up! It's kind of like the Simms…

Okay. That's my random musing for the day. Review please. If you don't it's okay. I'm in this sumbitch 'til the end, reviews or no!