It must have been around one in the morning when Kyle suddenly was jerked out of sleep. He sat up quickly and looked around the dark staff room for what could have caused the rude interruption on his dream, to no avail.

He slowly laid back down in his recliner (yes, that's what the school's budget is spent on) and soon realized he was panting and had a cold sweat.

"Must have been a nightmare."

Kyle jumped in his skin and turned too quickly toward the voice, giving himself a head rush. Oh, thank god it's only Cartman. He thought, then quickly took it back realizing what he was saying.

"W-What?" He said, trying to even out his breathing.

"Explaining everything to Stan, it must have been a nightmare." Cartman's voice was oddly dull.

They were sleeping in the staff meeting room because it was the only one with comfortable chairs. Eric was comfortably settled with a bottle of something red at his side, in a chair right next to Kyle's.

Kyle took a second to think about that. "Oh. Yeah… Kind of. It wasn't so bad actually saying it all, but having to watch his face change with every sentence…" He looked back at Cartman in the pitch black and tried to see him.

"Did you tell him?" Cartman asked with a tired slur. "You know, about the details?"

"No." Kyle said quickly. "No, no, I don't think he could have handled that much bad news at once. I just…"

'What did he want from you, Kyle?'

"I told him it was a power trip for you, basically."

There was a light chuckle from Eric at that. Then a moment of silence besides the sound of a bottle opening and closing a few seconds later.

"Cartman…" Kyle said carefully. "Are you drunk?"

More silence from the other party.

"Cartman?"

"A bit, yes. Why? You planning something?"

Kyle had to smile softly at that. "No, you're the one with all the plans. I'm just the bitch-boy sidekick."

"That's correct. So don't even think of using that big head of yours, I got you covered. We'll get through this all on me covering both our asses. Like… A blanket."

At least he's a fun drunk and not an angry drunk. Kyle thought.

Kyle got up and worked his way over to Eric's chair in the dark. "Scoot over, it's cold in here." He said, nudging Cartman over. He snorted and moved a bit so Kyle could get comfy next to him. The recliners were big enough that the two of them fit easily in one together.

"So," Kyle said. "What is the plan?"

Cartman took another swing of the bottle and then said, "We'll head to Vegas and get a cheap motel room. Then we sell yer body on the corners, me being your pimp of course. After we make enough money to last us a while we can go wherever we please. Maybe settle down in some city where I'll getta job and you'll be a house wife and make me dinner every night. And we'll have a dog."

"I prefer cats," Kyle said, grinning.

"Fine, well you'll have a cat and I'll hava dog. He'll probably eat your girly ass cat, though. And then after a few years, at least til my dog dies, we'll leave and go to take over the world." Cartman turned onto his side and talked so close to Kyle that Kyle could feel his breath on the side of his neck. "That sound ok to you?"

Kyle instinctively turned onto his side now and faced away from Cartman. "I dunno. I don't really picture you to be the settling type. You'd probably cheat on me and have a mid life crisis before we took over the world. Maybe you should buy a motorcycle ahead of time."

"Not a bad idea," Eric said, wrapping his arm around Kyle's waist and pulling him closer to him. "But I doubt we could fit yer poofy hair into the helmet." Cartman's hand slipped under Kyle's shirt but not going any further then his waist.

"What are you doing, Cartman?" Kyle asked, feeling his breath on the back of his neck now, giving him the shivers.

"I'm drunk. I can do whatever I want." Cartman explained in an ever-so-un-explanational way. Then he did the oddest thing and kissed Kyle on the back of his neck. No biting, to licking, no death threatening grins. Just a soft kiss.

"C-Cartman…?" Kyle muttered unsurely.

"You need to go to sleep, Kyle. We have to be up before six tomorrow and you need to sleep." Eric said, although his actions would state other wise. He kissed him again and then again on his vertebrae, each kiss softer and slower then the last.

"Cart…man…?" Kyle said, drifting off. "What…" It was hard to make words form; it felt like he'd been drinking maple syrup.

Every time Cartman kissed him it felt like he was being enchanted. It was strangely soothing and maybe he didn't really understand what was going on, but he didn't really mind it.

"Relax. I've got you covered." Cartman said quietly.

"Er…...ic…" And finally Kyle was asleep.

Cartman looked at Kyle, now sleeping soundly, and wondered something. He turned Kyle over, making him face himself, and kissed him on the lips this time. Kyle made a soft quiet noise. Eric sighed and laid back down, tucking Kyle's head under his chin.

"Don't tell Cartman I did that," He whispered to Kyle, soon enough falling asleep himself.