And it came to me then that every plan
Is a tiny prayer to father time
As I stared at my shoes in the ICU
That reeked of piss and 409
And I rationed my breaths as I said to myself
That I've already taken too much today
As each descending peak on the LCD
Took you a little farther away from me
Away from me
Amongst the vending machines and year-old magazines
In a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind that our memories depend
On a faulty camera in our minds
And I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose
Than to have never lain beside at all
And I looked around at all the eyes on the ground
As the TV entertained itself
'Cause there's no comfort in the waiting room
Just nervous faces bracing for bad news
And then the nurse comes 'round and everyone lift their heads
But I'm thinking of what Sarah said
That love is watching someone die
So who's gonna watch you die? So who's gonna watch you die
Death Cab For Cutie – What Sarah Said
I inhaled sharply as I stood in the waiting room. Carlisle was next to me and I could hear a few whispers that I recognized coming from room thirteen, where Caleb and my father were at the moment.
"Is he going to be okay?" I asked Carlisle for the thousandth time. He nodded, glancing at my face, his expression slightly amused. I fell down into one of the chairs and, in less than five minutes, was pacing again, my arms crossed against my chest. I sigh rolled out of my body as I walked towards the door and wrenched it open. They had kept their voices to low murmurs so I wouldn't hear. It made me angry. I stepped in and placed my hands on my hips. They both stopped in mid-sentence. Apparently this was some very heated debate. I glared at my father and then my eyes fell on Caleb. He looked so tired, so weak. His gray eyes were still so bright though. I walked towards him, ignoring the protests of my father, and sat down on the edge of his bed as I felt his arms curl around my waist, pulling me towards him. I smiled.
"As I was saying, Mr. Cullen, I love her. Why else would I have risked my life and the life of my family members?" Caleb asked rhetorically. I smiled again and leaned down to kiss the top of his head. I glanced at my father, noticing his displeasure. That was when I first noticed my mother sitting in a chair in the corner. I sighed. She was looking at me with an expression that clearly said she was glad I disobeyed her.
"Imprinting isn't always love," my father objected. Caleb sat up instantly, his hands coming off of me.
"Yes, well, then next time I kiss my sister or cousin like I kissed Claire today you can tell me it's not love for me," Caleb said sarcastically. I saw my father's face turn into a grimace.
"Why can't I read his mind, Claire?" Edward asked, turning to look at me.
"I told you I couldn't…the day I met him," I said softly, watching Caleb lay back down as my fingertips traced the contours of his hair. He was perfect, perfect in every way. I could see Caleb try to hide his smile.
"You've known him for only a few weeks, Claire…you can't love him," my mother objected.
"She does," my father said simply. I looked up. He rarely ever read my mind, but he did now…seeing as it was unprotected right now due to the fact that I wasn't blaring a song in my mind to keep him out. I inhaled sharply and pulled my knees up on the bed, resting my chin on top of them. A sigh escaped my lips and I felt Caleb's comforting hand on my back, tracing my spine like he had done in class today.
My father was right, I had only known him for a few weeks. It's pretty impossible to fall in love in that short of a time. Of course, werewolves found it almost immediately and that made me a little curious. Vampires were selfish…we always wanted love. So…for both of us, it was purely possible. I smiled, realizing that there was nothing wrong with us. Us…it sounded really nice.
"Dad…is that necessary?" I asked angrily, realizing for a second that he was seeing everything I was thinking right now…including just how amazing that kiss today was. It was a little aggravating knowing that he knew how in love we both probably were…if we were.
"Yes, it is. I'm not judging by what you tell me, I'm judging by your thoughts…they're the exact same thoughts I had when I first fell in love with your mother, I think," he said, smiling. Wow…he smiled. I smiled back, too.
"Anyway, Mr. And Mrs. Cullen, basically what I'm trying to say is that Claire and I are perfect for each other. So I am asking your permission now. Is it okay for us to date?" Caleb asked. I looked at him incredulously. There were no lies in his words. I was shocked, though, that he would ask them without asking me first.
"No," my father repeated. I stood instinctively, reflexively.
"Dad!" I shouted angrily. I heard the LCD for the first time as the beeping momentarily slowed and the room quieted. I glanced at Caleb out of reflex and saw he was fine before turning back on my father.
"Claire, he's a werewolf!"
"He saved my life!" I yelled.
"You know a full grown one could easily tear me apart. Emmet wasn't there in time either. It would have taken his uncle two seconds!"
"Claire, I said no," my father said, staying firm.
"Fine…we'll have to keep sneaking around behind your back then! You can't stop me from going to school and seeing him there!" Suddenly a nurse walked in and I glanced at the door.
"Excuse me, but the patient needs rest…can I ask all but one visitor leave," she suggested.
"Claire, stay," Caleb insisted. I watched as my father left and my mother stood, walking towards me and kissing the top of my head.
"I'll talk to him," she promised, smiling at me. I nodded and smiled back at her as I watched her exit the room. The nurse went to work adding more sedatives that Carlisle had expertly measured from his previous work with werewolves a long time ago. I watched as she added more to the bag of fluids hanging up. I smiled and went to slide off the bed and sit in the chair so he would be more comfortable, but an arm wound around my waist, keeping me from moving.
"Stay here," he said, sounding a little groggy. I grimaced as I saw all the needles sticking into his body. According to Carlisle he was wearing a pair of sweatpants and no shirt, and I didn't mind. He sat up and leaned against the back of the bed. I could clearly mark out the muscled chest he had, it was obvious, right there in front of me. Tanned and perfect skin stretched over a six-pack and a to-die-for pair of pecs. I smiled and touched his chest, letting my hands feel the contours until they reached the bandage there. It was soaked with blood. To any vampire the scent of werewolf blood is the most unappetizing thing in the world. But I was starving and there was blood right in front of me, blood that reminded me of the nurse standing not far away. Alice entered the room then and grabbed my hand.
"Caleb, we're taking Claire to go get something to eat. We'll have her back in a jiffy," she promised, towing me through the door. I sighed as we got out and then the scents of all of the humans here hit me like a wrecking ball and I was almost undone. I knew Alice's restraining hands were right at my back and I could see Emmet behind me from my peripheral vision. I submitted and they pulled me outside.
I walked back into the hospital, wiping the last traces of moose from my mouth and wiping it on my jeans. Oh well, bloodstains were frequent with our family. I was still on edge and I made my way hurriedly to Caleb's room and went inside. He was struggling to stay awake and, as soon as I entered the door, he relaxed. I smiled and him and walked over to the bed and sat down. I smiled and ran a hand through his hair.
"Go to sleep," I said in a whisper.
"Only if you lay here with me." I sighed, smiling and laid down next to him, feeling his arm wrap around my body protectively and then pull me closer to him. His warmth was incredible, unlike anything I knew. I stared at the wall and let my breathing quicken to match his as he drifted into unconsciousness. There were two sounds that I never let myself miss: the LCD monitor and the sound of his breathing. If he died…which it was improbable that he would, though the wound would have killed a human on the spot, I would be the first to alert Carlisle. Each peak that the LCD made was like sitting on the edge of your seat in a horror movie. You know something is about to happen, the heroine is about to be murdered, but you still wait for it, knowing it's coming, but needing that proof. I was ill at ease the entire time. On occasion I would be more alert, when the LCD slowed to the heart rate of a human or the peaks became lower. On those occasions I would listen to only his heartbeat until everything returned t normal. I hadn't realized how I knew his functions so well…I had never thought about it, but my mind had seemed to record every action of his, even his regular heartbeat.
It seemed like hours where he slept and I kept guard over his mortality. Then my father entered again and I sat up, Caleb's arm falling off of my waist and onto my lap. He didn't wake up and I wasn't all that surprised. I was on top of the blankets, Caleb under. He couldn't complain, could he? My father looked at me, his golden eyes stirring as I scooted back to lean against the headboard. He looked at his shoes and pressed his long fingers to his temples, massaging his head. I felt like I was about to be lectured.
"Claire, his family is here, you need to get out, plus we need to speak with you," he said quietly. I nodded and slipped out of Caleb's arm and letting my feet hit the floor before walking out of the room at a human pace. My father followed me out, but not as fast as I would have expected. I wandered into his thoughts only to hear the sound of the Ave Maria being translated into sign language. Miffed, I walked to the chair in the waiting room and flopped down between Alice and Jasper. Jasper, I could tell, went to work and soothed my nerves, but there was no comfort there for me. I was too on an edge and my "powers" were starting to go a little haywire. I could see lights flickering when I walked by them. It wasn't good for that to happen. Even now, as I sat beneath one of the fluorescent lights, I could feel the light being pulled to me. Angry, I tried to concentrate on something else as I watched Keira, Rose, Lucy, Clark, and Micah enter the hospital room.
"What?" I asked my father expectantly as I kept my ears and mind trained to what was behind the hospital door.
"He loves her," I heard Keira say softly. I could the murmurs of assent from the others. As soon as Caleb turned into a wolf as well as the other males in his family, they all would have known exactly what he was thinking.
"He imprinted," Lucy continued. Again I sighed, waiting for my father to compose himself. I ignored the other room for now, listening to the LCD monitor behind the door to make sure his heart kept beating. Other than that, my full attention was on my family.
"Claire, you love him, I know that now. You're willing to risk your life for him and we can see that in your every action," Alice said softly, placing one of her tiny hands on my shoulder. I shrugged it off immediately.
"Claire, he's a werewolf. He's an enemy. More than likely his family is here to kill ours," my father said slowly. I let that sink in. Once again, it was purely possible. It made me angry, though, that for a moment, I second-guessed Caleb. I froze and my eyes turned to the door as his family walked out, all but Keira. She looked at me and nodded her head in the direction of the room.
"We'll talk about it later, Edward. Let her go," Carlisle said. I smiled at my grandfather and went to the room as Keira held the door open for me and then closed it behind me. Caleb was still in a very, very deep sleep. Keira smiled at me as I sat down on the bed next to Caleb and touched his hair softly.
"You love him, then?" she asked, smiling.
"I do," I admitted sheepishly. This was harder than I had expected…talking to someone who I barely knew, who had such an impact on Caleb's life, who could truly influence his decision, and to admit that I loved him straight to her face…it was a lot of pressure to undergo at the moment. Especially considering everything I had been through, today, it was hard not to be nervous. Keira was someone I wanted to be on the good side of. I knew that much.
"Good, because he lives for you now. Imprinting is…impossible to fight. Believe me when I say that he will always love you now. He lives for you and he breathes for you and, as you saw today, he's perfectly ready and willing to die for you," she said, looking at her hands.
"Has it happened to you?" I asked before I could stop myself. I saw a bright crimson color stain her cheeks immediately.
"Yes, it has," she said, smiling at me. "I had to leave him when we came to America though. He's waiting for me…he loves me and I love him. We're being married formally at the end of the school year here. He's flying in to get married in Forks. Of course, that's beside the point. What I need to talk to you about is why…why everything is happening so fast." I stopped and scooted backwards, feeling Caleb's warm body against my back. He stirred lightly, and, as though in instinct, his arm curled around my waist. I smiled in spite of myself.
"What is happening?" I asked, raising my eyebrows at her in confusion.
"Like what happened today…why our family came here…what's going on with the murders in Port Angeles," she said, her face growing somber. "We know it's one of your kind doing it. We aren't thick…we know what it is…the badly disposed of corpses…bodies scarred beyond recognition. It has to be a vampire. Then again, we know it's not your family. We've been trailing your family for a little while now, always at a safe enough distance to not be seen or smelled…we know you eat only animals. Then that brings up who could possibly be doing this. Does your coven have any ideas?"
"We're almost sure it's a rogue. Most likely it's also someone new to this life…someone untrained. You should talk to Carlisle about it though…he knows far better than I do," I admitted, looking at Caleb's serene face. I wished I could know what he was dreaming about, but his mind was inaccessible to me. I smiled though, and touched the side of his face with my cold hand. I saw him smile in his sleep.
"Carlisle? He's the doctor, correct? The leader and the one who saved my brother," she said, smiling as she recalled the very handsome doctor who stood outside, a man who was forever twenty-three. "I'll be right back. Oh…and I should think he might be waking up soon…he was terrible about the whole sedatives thing…they never keep him asleep for more than a few minutes." I smiled at her and watched her leave. When the door slammed behind her, I felt a body stir next to me and I smiled.
"Morning, sunshine," I said, turning around to look at him.
"Morning, yourself," he said, smiling at me. He looked refreshed, that was for sure. I smiled at him and touched his cheek with my cold hand again, running the back of my fingertips across his warm, sweet face. She smiled and grabbed my hand, pulling it towards his face and inhaling the scent of me. He smiled.
"It doesn't burn the hair in my nose anymore. In fact…I kind of like it…it's like kiwi. I always loved kiwi when I was a kid," he joked. I could hear the small slurs in his words. He was so tired…so drugged right now. I smiled at him, suppressing my snort of laughter as I leaned over him, one hand on each side of his neck and leaned down to kiss him. His hand, which was all covered in different IVs, reached up to cradle my face as I watched his eyes close again. Mine closed too. I smiled against his lips, laughing a bit and he did the same before we both pulled away at the sound of a cough in the doorway. It was Emmet.
"I…uh…wanted to thank you for saving my niece when I wasn't there in time," he said, scratching the back of his head as he tried to find the right words and keep the situation from being too awkward. I laughed at him and fell onto the bed next to Caleb, who, with ease, pulled me against his warm body and turned on his side, pressing his warm lips to my back where my halter-top didn't cover. I shivered and felt him smile as he released me and let me sit up again.
"No problem. Emmet right?" he asked, sitting up as well. I flinched to push him back down when I saw him wince in pain, but something told me not to stop him. I knew his healing process was quick, that he would be fine in a relatively short amount of time.
"Yeah, Emmet," said my uncle, smiling. "Now…you kids weren't about to do anything inappropriate, were you? I mean this is a hospital…it may be full of beds but there's too many people…Rose and I had that problem once back in the day when we came to visit Carlisle back when we were living in Denali…see we were about to," he stopped, seeing that I hand my hands over my ears. I could hear his thunderous laugh as he rolled his eyes. I pulled my hands away. "Sorry, Kiddo. I guess you don't want to hear that much about your aunt and uncle."
"Never in my life do I need to know things like that!" I practically shouted at him, grabbing one of my shoes and flinging it at him, which he dodged easily as it bounced out the door and was picked up by my mother. She smiled and shook her head, walking back into the room.
"I like him," Emmet said with a smile.
"Out," my mother said with a roll of her eyes. Emmet smirked and left as my mother dropped the shoe at the foot of the bed where my other one was. She sat down in one of the chairs and looked at us both, her hands folded in her lap. "Claire…your father and I and Carlisle just spoke with Keira…I think she said he name was…and we decided it would be…more prudent for the two of you to not sneak out anymore. We want you to stop going behind everyone's backs and we're letting you date, but there are conditions," she said, holding up her hand when she saw how surprised and excited I got. I groaned.
"We think," she continued, still smirking. "We think it would be best for you two to be together twice a week on school nights and you can spend entire weekends together as well. Caleb is allowed in the house whenever he wants…and Keira said that Caleb will come and get you when his aunt and uncle are not home."
I was ready to scream with delight. This was more than I had ever hoped for. I jumped off the bed and threw my arms around my mother.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I yelled, so ecstatic that I actually kissed her on the cheek before releasing my death grip around her neck. She smiled and looked pointedly towards the door where my father was now standing.
"He had more to do with this than I did. He realized how dangerous it was for me when I was dating…he thinks you're strong enough to take care of yourselves. He also realized how hard it was on both of us when we were kept apart all those different times."
I smiled at her and then walked towards my dad and wrapped my arms around his waist as he embraced me. "When I saw everything that happened…the day I was reborn…you did it…you made me this way," I said softly. "Thank you so much for doing that to me. Not many would want this life…but I love it. Without it…I would have never found my soul mate," I whispered. I felt his shake and noticed he was sobbing a bit. He composed himself quickly though and I took a step back, dropping my arms back at my side. "Thank you, dad."
"Claire, you're the only thing I have left to protect. Your mother is more frightening than Rosalie when she gets angry…I just want to make sure you'll always be okay," he said as he bent down and kissed the top of my head.
"Dad…I can run faster than you…I can fight harder than Emmet. I may be fragile but I can put up a hell of a fight. And remember I can read minds and bend light," I said with a smile.
"I know, baby," he said with a smile, running a hand through my soft hair before touching my cheek. "Don't be stupid with this freedom either. I expect you both to act…moral," he said, sounding like, for once, he was struggling for words. I laughed and fell backwards onto the bed where Caleb sat up instantly and caught me.
"Dad…believe me…that is a long way away…we just kissed for the first time today, remember?" I asked rhetorically. Both he and my mother laughed and left the room, my mom winking at me as she went. I rolled my eyes and turned around. Caleb was leaning against the back of it again, almost in a sitting position. I smiled impishly and went on all fours, crawling towards him, careful not to put my knees in any unfortunate places. He laughed as I placed my hands on his bare chest and then lay down so that I was pressed against his body, my head resting on his warm and perfect chest, my arm draped over his abs. My leg was curled around one of his as his arm stayed under my head, making it comfortable with its warmth. It curled around and his hand was on my shoulder. I was perfectly at ease and then, in an instinct, my mind slipped back to listening to each beat on the LCD as I watched him fall to sleep quickly and easily. I smiled at his sleeping form as I heard another person enter. I groaned and saw it was Alice and Rosalie. Both of them had two very different things on their minds.
"Claire, stop paying so much attention to his heart rate. He's going to be fine," Alice said, her high and musical voice sounding more like a song. I smiled at her, but I didn't move. She laughed and then left as Rosalie went and sat in the chair.
"Claire," she said softly.
"Yeah, Rose?" I asked, confused by her behavior. She had never really been too cordial to me, but she wasn't even incredibly nice to Alice. She treated me like she treated everyone else.
"I wanted to talk to you about what we told you today…about your past," she said quietly.
"Claire…when we found you, I was in a rage…the same thing happened to me, if you recall me telling you the story. Of course, I didn't want them to change you, honestly I thought it was a horrible thing. You were like me…beautiful, young, and hurt, broken and weak in the street." She sighed and placed her face in her hands. "What I'm saying, though, Claire, is that…even though it's probably the worst thing that can happen to someone-" and I cut her off.
"I don't remember any of it. I don't remember anything of my life. I know I was homeless…and I know I had blue eyes…and I know I was pretty. I know I was raped but I don't remember a thing of it. You found me and your family saved me, made is so that I could find the one person I was meant to be with. He was meant only for me. Rosalie…if you know what it is, he imprinted. I was meant to be made how I am…I was meant for him…as he was for me. I'm grateful for what your family did. In fact, I'm grateful to those men for doing what they did. Without their interference in my life…I never would have found you or my parents or my other aunts or uncles or Carlisle and Esme…and I never would have ever found him," I said softly, my fingertips brushing against the tanned skin of his chest. I inhaled sharply.
"Claire, don't…don't regret missing out on being human, please. I regret it every minute of every day. I can never stop wishing I could have little babies with Emmet and watch them run around and watch them grow up like I've watched everyone else with children. I wanted to have grandchildren and maybe even great-grandchildren. I can't now, though. And now I'm bitter and harsh…harsh towards those who asked for this life…"
"I didn't ask for it, but I feel blessed for having it," I said simply. "I can't regret or miss something I never remember having."
"That's all I needed to know," she said, standing up and leaving the room. I smiled, watching her leave. Rosalie wasn't a very talkative person, when I thought about it. She was often a bit…she kept to herself. It was nice to hear her open up to me. I liked it. She was my aunt, after all. And I watched Caleb sleep, staying wrapped in his arms. I didn't listen to his every heartbeat anymore. I just listened to him breathe, watched him breath, watched his face make odd expressions as he dreamed. I was perfectly at east here.
A/N: Hmm…a lot of fluffiness…but you don't mind do you? Everyone loves fluff! Anyways…reviews please. Oh…had you thought I forgot about the murders in Port Angeles…hmm…I wrote this way before the first chapter of Eclipse…I feel ripped off, haha.