A/N: Angst-city it is! Hahahhah... maybe I'm just not ready to see Peyton in the same frame as Mac and Stella. Good thing, season3 will be aired over here in the Philippines April2007. Loooong time to prepare myself.

Anyway, apart from the angst -- we'll have a bit of flirting here in this chapter. I hope the you're not tired of this already. Thank you! Reviews are my lifeblood. hugs

I've known you all my life
You are a friend of mine
I know this is how it's gonna be

I've loved you then and I love you still
You're a friend of mine
Now, I know friends are all we ever could be

My apartment was never the same after the Frankie incident – or more appropriately: after I killed Frankie. When crime scene clean up was finally through with it, I stripped off all the wall paper and sold all the artwork on the walls then bought new ones. I even got a new bed and tub. I didn't have a single picture of a human being in this house, not even my picture.

When I think about it, it makes me sad. I've been to dozens of shrinks since that happened but somehow, I'm not the same Stella. I feel like a functioning shell; I feel emptier now that I have no one to confide to.

Whenever I feel lonely, my first impulse is to call Mac and talk about it with him. Sometimes, he offers to go over here and make sure I sleep. But I can't do that tonight, right – knowing that he's having a nice high-class dinner with Peyton.

Peyton. I've worked with her in a number of cases, often the ones with Mac. We're civil and we don't talk outside the lab or off the case. I don't talk to her, she doesn't talk to me. One time, Mac left us in a room – his office – together just to see if we'd warm up to each other. I mean, she's a nice person but my defense mechanism isn't letting her in. I guess the fact that she's with Mac and I'm still feeling the need to 'protect' him from harm contradicts everything. The fact is… I just don't trust her that much. Especially not with Mac Taylor. Argh! I need to stop talking and thinking about him. Like he said, he's happy and he has his own life now. Now, Bonasera – get yours!

The thought of French cuisine and four courses reminded me of how hungry I am. I totally skipped lunch to pursue a lead and the what little dinner I had is now gone since an eight-block run burns calories even after the chase is over. Delivery in this part of town is at a snail's pace so I braved peeking in my fridge finding only a few bottles of water, a carton of milk and a few strawberries I fancied buying two days ago. In my cupboards… corn flakes. Geez, considering that the grocery shop is just in front of my building.

Oh well, taking my bowl of corn flakes, milk and slices of strawberries, I curl up in front of the TV and happen to catch Apollo 13. Oh how I wish the smart men I meet are as hot as these actors. Come to think of it, the people I work with are pretty easy on the eyes.

Right when I was nursing my second bowl of cereal (for dinner, no less), someone knocked on my door. I didn't have to peek into the peephole because he identified himself right away. "It's me," Mac said.

What in the hell is he doing here? Dinner's finished already? But it's only 9pm. I let him in and he was holding a brown paper bag. "Mac, what's that? Left-overs?" I was half joking.

"Very funny, Stella," he joked back, placing the bag on my kitchen counter and getting a plate for it. He is certainly not shy. "No, this is chicken carbonara with angel hair pasta and mushroom. I figured that you'd have your usual takeouts or cereal," he said pointing to the bowl in my hand, "since I'm at a restaurant already, I got you something."

I sat on one of the bar stools and watched him plate the food. "So this is kind of like 'sharing the blessing'?" I said with a smirk. It's a new side of Mac Taylor – very domestic. "And why didn't you get me French food?"

"Because… I may have had four courses tonight but servings were so small, I had to stop by McDonalds for a cheeseburger on my way here."

"Gives me new meaning for 'Big Mac' then," I laughed. He pushed the plate to me and he poured us some milk. "You sure aren't shy."

"Remember, Stella, I processed your place for five hours. I know where everything is," he winked as I felt all blood leaving my face. Then he burst out laughing. "Just eat. Finish that up, okay?" I look down at the contents of the plate; strings of angel hair pasta in white sauce and mushroom and bits of chicken. Looks tasty but the only problem is, Mac served me enough pasta to feed two people.

"Mac, are you implying that I eat like a man?" I eye him feigning hurt. I start eating, not waiting for his witty retort.

He sat down beside me and said, "Yes and I find that cute."

I don't know why I didn't have whiplash after he said that. "What did you say?" I chokingly asked.

Apparently, he was surprised, too by his own comment. But he brushed it off by saying, "Nothing. Just gobble it all up. We'll just store the left-over in your fridge."

We. "Meaning, you and me?" I pushed after swallowing a forkful. Boy, this is good food.

He sighed. Oh yeah, now I'm annoying him. "Yes… you and me, Stella. You find the Tupperware and I'll put it in the fridge. Works for you?" It's childish, I know.

After I finished half of what he gave me, he helped clean up and over strawberries we finally had the chance to talk again.

"So how was the 'date', Mac?" I asked out of the blue. Uh-oh, Stella…

He studied the strawberry in his hand and said without looking at me, "I'm a gentleman, Stella. I don't kiss and tell." I could sense in the tone of his voice that he wasn't amused that I asked. "We do our own business, right?"

Well, that put me in my place. He's in his 'boss' mode. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked." I stood up to put the fruits back in my fridge and get a drink of water to calm my nerves. I wasn't sure whether I'm hurt or offended by his demeanor. "You're right, it's none of my business. What do you want to talk about?"

Mac softened up a bit and said, "Stell, that's not what I meant." What did he mean then? "What Peyton and I do is between the two of us. It's not for office gossip."

Oh-kay, that pierced me through the heart. Tears began to build up in my eyes. He has a point though. And you know what they say… the truth hurts. "I get it, Mac. I totally get it and I'm sorry I even thought of asking. Now if you'll excuse me, it's been a very long day for all of us and I'm tired. You know the way outside and kindly lock the door on your way out." I made my way to my room but before closing the door, I choked out, "Good night, Mac." As soon as my body collided with my bed, tears began pouring down like rain.

Sleep never got to me that night so I went out of my room, finding a note on my fridge door with Mac's handwriting on it:

Stella,

I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it to come out that way. It's just that Peyton and I are having a rough patch and I apologize for bringing it out on you. I know you meant well – you always do. Stella, you're my best friend. I hope you understand.

Mac.

Best friends. That's all we'll ever be, I guess.