Yep, another day, another chapter! Since I left you all itching to find out what happens to Stan, I know you're all are ready for this chapter! Wa-hoo!

Recap: "I've come to a conclusion," said Maxwell, avoiding eye contact with her. "But you won't like it at all…"

Chapter 6: Clowns, Closets, and Nasty Conclusions

Sandy gulped. "What do you mean?"

"I mean," Maxwell said gravely. "That the worst has come upon us. Stan seems to be in some sort of sugar coma. I'm not certain if he'll ever wake up…"

"Oh Stan!" cried Sandy, flinging her arms around Stan's neck. "Why did you have to go like this? Why?" She began to cry desperately.

But then, Stan gave a HUGE snore and rolled over. Then his eyes opened. "What's going on here, sis?" he asked Sandy.

"Maxwell? You said he was going to die!" Sandy yelled.

"Or he could've been, um, just sleeping?" Maxwell said.

"Maxwell!" Sandy slapped Maxwell.

"Stan!" Maxwell hit Stan.

"Pashy babe!" Stan slapped Pashmina on her butt.

"Pervert!" yelled Pashmina. But though she hit him hard on the arm, she was barely able to hide a note of relief in her voice.

"We wanna play!" shouted Pretzel and Cinnamon who had just appeared by the door. They thought it was a game and dived on the group, slapping everyone as hard as they could.

"You're all idiots!" yelled Bijou, hastily picking up both Pretzel and Cinnamon by their ears and thrusting them into the closet. She made a clicking noise with her teeth and said, "There! I've locked you in!"

As Bijou walked back to the group, Sandy hissed, "Bij, I don't like, think there's a lock on that door!"

"I know." Bijou smiled, receiving strange glances from everyone. "But they don't know that now, do they?"

"You're a genius, Bijou! Even by my standards." Maxwell grinned.

Stan, Maxwell, Sandy, Pashmina and Bijou went off to relax and watch TV.

-

-

"Hey Bij," Pashmina asked a bit later in front of the television. "It's been a while, what do you think Pretzel and Cinnamon are doing in there?"

"Good question." She responded, giving it a good thought. "I'm sure they've found something to entertain themselves. I mean, if the vacuum leads to a different world, I have yet to imagine what could be in the…closet…oh my gosh…"

Bijou's eyes grew wide, visions of all the terrible things that could be happening to Pretzel and Cinnamon right now! What if they were eaten by a giant squid? What if a mad murderer with a chainsaw killed them? Or worse, what if they came back as ghosts to haunt Bijou and make sure she never babysat again?

"Hang on you two! I'm a-coming!" Bijou called down the hall.

The closet door slammed against the wall as the French girl threw open the door and into the closet. Inside, it was pitch black.

"Pretzel, Cinnamon?" she whispered, but no reply came. She grabbed the doorknob with fear in her heart, and walked out.

When she looked around, she noticed that it was definitely not the door she came in. A gigantic audience sat in rows and rows of stands before a stage that resembled a kitchen. And sitting in the front row of said stands was, you guessed it…

Barney.

Nah, just kidding. It was really…

"Pretzel! Cinnamon!" Bijou yelled with relief in her voice.

"Bijou lady person!" cried the troublesome two together. "You just in time for show-show!"

"A show?" Bijou pondered, looking up at the stage. "Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to sit down and watch for a while…" She took a seat.

In a few minutes, a figure appeared on the stage and met loud applause.

"Thank you all for coming here tonight!" spoke the woman to the audience. "I'm Hamtha Stewart (Parody of Martha Stewart) and I hope you have a great time here! Let's start by calling up some volunteers!"

Hamtha scanned the audience and her eyes wandered to Pretzel and Cinnamon, the two buffoons in the front row, waving their hands madly yelling, "Pick us! Pick us! We like blueberry pie!"

"Well, how about you two rascals in the front row?" Hamtha pointed to them.

"YAY!" the siblings yelled, skipping up to the stage.

"Okay you two," Hamtha spoke. "Let's start off by telling me your names and-"

"Piggyback!" Cinnamon and Pretzel leapt onto her back, pulling her hair and ripping her sweater terribly.

Hamtha managed to maintain a smile as she pulled them off her, but it was obvious that she was not too pleased. "Now, tell me your names, children." She said with a cheery smile.

"Pretzel!" Cinnamon said, putting her hand on her forehead in a salute.

"Cinnamon!" Pretzel also saluted her.

"My, my, what lovely names!" Hamtha smiled again, patting them each on the head. "Now, the dish we're preparing today is fresh blueberries in a delightful flaky crust, but you may know it as blueberry pie."

Pretzel and Cinnamon practically exploded with excitement. "BLUEBERRY PIE!"

"Yes, yes, pie is exciting." Hamtha trotted over to the stove on the set. "Now, Cinnamon, can you come and help me pour the flour?"

"Yes m'am!" Pretzel and Cinnamon both came running.

"Now Pretzel," Hamtha told Cinnamon. "You'll have your turn next. I asked for Cinnamon, not you Pretzel."

"Oh, okay!" Pretzel scurried away.

"No! Cinnamon, come back!" Hamtha stated.

"But me is right here." Cinnamon told her, looking neglected.

"No, you're Pretzel, right?" Hamtha was looking puzzled.

"Yes, me Pretzel." Pretzel called from the other side of the stage.

"Yes, me Pretzel!" Cinnamon also said.

"I DON'T CARE!" Hamtha snapped. "You with the cream fur, knead the crust! You with the brown fur, wash the blueberries!"

The two hamsters happily jogged to their positions and started their jobs.

"Well," Hamtha spoke to the audience. "Now that those two are at their positions, I can tell you all about a little recipe for-"

Splat! Hamtha stopped speaking as a huge wad of dough hit the back of her head. She turned around to see the two volunteers throwing dough at each other!

In a few second's time, the entire set was covered with sloppy wet dough!

"That's it!" Hamtha snapped. "You two have ruined my set, and the show, and worst of all, you ripped the sweater that my mommy made for me! You make me so mad! So…very…mad…"

Hamtha took a deep breath. For a second, it looked like she was calming down. Then, her whole figure seemed to bulge. Indeed, she was growing, bigger and bigger, until she looked quite deformed, but very threatening.

"I AM MEGA-HAMTHA!" her voice boomed. "LITTLE PESTS MUST BE EXTERMINATED!"

"Oh no you don't!" came a voice from the audience. Bijou padded up onto the stage and scooped up Pretzel and Cinnamon in her arms.

Punch! Kick! Pow! Mega-Hamtha laid on the stage, knocked out cold by Bijou's blows.

"Bijou girl save us!" Pretzel and Cinnamon cheered.

"Hey…I guess I did…" Bijou panted, as she was very out of breath. "Now, let's get out of here before something crazier happens…"

-

-

"Stan…" Sandy poked her brother. "You've been staring at that TV screen for a long time now, will you please stop?"

"Must…watch…violent…TV…" Stan mumbled, drooling a bit.

"It's no use, Sands." Pashmina told her. "I've been trying for ages, he won't-"

"I'm back!" Bijou called, springing into the room with Pretzel and Cinnamon in her arms.

"But did you have to bring those two back with you?" Stan muttered, finally turning away from the bloody show he was watching.

"Pashmina! Maxwell! Sandy! Jimmy!" Pretzel yelled, bouncing around.

"Did he just call me Jimmy?" asked Stan.

"Aw, just go back to watching your violent television, Stan." Bijou snapped at him.

"M'kay!" Stan turned back to his show.

"No!" Pashmina yelled. "Bij, we've been trying to get him to stop watching for a long time now!"

"Oops, sorry!" Bijou cried. "Stan, stop watching!"

"It's too late," Sandy told her briskly. "He's under a TV trance now."

"Stan!" Bijou yelled.

"STAN!" Sandy screamed.

"Oh Stanny," Pashmina said in a feminine tone. "I just spilled water all over my new white shirt. Won't you help me clean it up?"

Stan still didn't look away.

"Man, he really is in a trance." Pashmina said blankly. "What do we do now?"

"I have an idea," Maxwell smirked. "Hey Stan! Ronald McDonald just exploded!"

"WHERE?" Stan turned his head around at breakneck speed.

"Violent enough for you, Stan?" Maxwell grinned. "I knew that'd get your atten-"

KAA-BOOM! The group of teens ran outside to see a clown lying in the middle of the streets, covered in ash.

"I'm…cough…lovin' it!" said the clown.

"Well, that was convenient and disturbing!" Stan said loudly.

The group walked back in to meet Pretzel and Cinnamon, who both cried with a resounding tone, "We're bored!"

"How about a nice game of tic-tac-toe?" Stan suggested.

"Wow, that's the best idea you've ever had!" Pashmina complimented him.

2.5 seconds later…

Pretzel's ears stuck out of the giant suit he was wearing, which resembled the letter 'O'. Cinnamon looked no better in her 'X' shaped costume.

"TIC-TAC-TOE!" the siblings shrieked, running at full speed and body-slamming into each other. By now, a vase, three chairs, and a portrait of their Auntie Lucile was broken.

"Stan!" Pashmina yelled. "This is the worst idea you've ever had!"

"I didn't mean it like this!" Stan tries to say, but he was drowned out by the calls of Pretzel and Cinnamon.

"TIC-TAC-TO-AHHHHH!" the pair shouted, Pretzel having accidentally tripped on a corner of the rug and causing him and his sister to crash into the wall.

"Tell me again why you didn't let Mega-Hamtha eat them?" Sandy asked Bijou.

"Ah, I expect I wouldn't get paid if I'd let them get ripped to shreds." Bijou sighed.

-

-

Pretzel and Cinnamon sat on the couch in full body-casts.

"We're gonna have a heck of a time explaining this to Mrs. Teriyaki." Pashmina gestured towards Pretzel and Cinnamon.

"Nah," Stan said. "They'll probably heal miraculously, bounce out of their casts, and land right on top of that angry prisoner in the doorway."

"Yeah, you're probably- wait, what figure in the doorway?" Bijou said chillingly.

All heads spun around to see a gangly girl wearing a striped prison outfit glaring at them.

"Oh my gosh!" Sandy shrieked. "It's…it's…!"

"Come now, girls." The figure spoke in a bloodcurdling voice. "Don't tell me you've forgotten my name already…"

"Uh, Pretzel, Cinnamon, this would be a great time to head miraculously, bounce out of your casts and land right on top of that girl!" Maxwell said worriedly.

"Don't bother, fools." The girl said. "They won't be able to save you. Nothing can. Now, before I punish you, say my name…"

"Tekkie…" all three girls spoke with horror.

"Good," Tekkie smiled evilly. "Now, prepare yourselves…"

-

-

So what's Tekkie up to? Well, she's mad, obviously, but what will she do to the gang? Please review! And if any of you noticed, when Bijou was wondering what happened to the kids, one of the things she thought up was, "What if they got eaten by a giant squid?"

I know some of you are thinking what I'm thinking, and yes, I put that there because I wrote this after I came home from 'Pirate's of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest.' I had to do something, the ending of that movie was so sad. Let's just say, calamari is a main food for me now.

Stupid Kraken. Anybody who hasn't seen the movie should go see it soon! IT ROCKS! I laughed! I cried! And cried and cried and cried…

-Mrs. Jack Sparrow AKA cappyandpashy4ever