wow there are some pissed off reviewers out there! sorry guys...but i do understand your anger. but trust me, it'll be ok. thank you for the reviews though, i really do appreciate them. ummm...so yeah i hope you guys are still reading this and i hope you enjoy!

(Joanne's POV)

It's about a week since Maureen left Chicago. I haven't heard from her once; no phone call, email, nothing. But she's just doing what I wanted her to do right? She's leaving me alone; she's respecting my decision. Not like the old Maureen I left five years ago.

I have talked to Mark, once. We briefly talked about Maureen and how she was doing. Actually Mark said that he hadn't spoke with her but one brief conversation when he happened to run into her downtown. Part of me actually wants to call and talk to her, see how she is doing. But is that just adding injury to insult? But I do want to make sure she is ok, even though I'm not dating her doesn't mean that I don't care about her.

Kristin and I are doing really well. However, the marriage thing has not been brought up by either of us yet. I'm actually glad that it hasn't; maybe that's what got me so confused on my feelings for Maureen and her. Maybe I was just scared of committing to Kristin. I do love her…I do.

"Baby, you here?" I was brought back into reality from Kristin screaming from the living room. "Baby?"

"In here?" I screamed from the bedroom where I was laying on our bed, just staring at the ceiling; I'd been that way for two hours…just thinking.

"What's wrong?" I could see the concern on her face. "You ok?" she asked as she sat down on the bed beside me rubbing my arm.

"Yeah I'm fine, no worries," I replied sitting up beside her. "So how was your day?" I was trying to change the subject, I didn't want to talk about even the mention of Maureen. Kristin was still a little uneasy about how I truly feel about Maureen and my decision.

"It was ok, nothing major," she continued as she got up, putting all her stuff in their respective places, not just throwing them everywhere, which is what Maureen would be doing right now. She would just throw her shit everywhere then probably come lay down beside me and make me talk about what was bothering me, because she would know that there was something bothering me and she would want to know and take care of it for me; that's just how Maureen was. Not that Kristin wasn't this way, she just tended to let things go if I didn't voluntarily open up at first. "So what do you think?" she asked again sitting beside me, wrapping her arm around me.

"Sorry honey what did you say?" I apologized, rubbing her back.

"Are you sure you're ok?"

"Fine," I mumbled getting up from the bed. "So what do you want to do tonight?" again trying to change the subject.

"Well, thought about maybe just ordering dinner in and watching movies," she more asked than suggested.

"Sounds great honey," I turned smiling at her as she got up from the bed walking towards me, wrapping her arms around my waist pulling me close towards her.

"You sure you're ok?" she questioned again.

"Perfect," I smiled, wrapping my arms around her neck, pulling her lips closer to mine. Our lips met in a passionate kiss; I could sense the hunger behind her kiss. With our lips never loosing connection from one another she led me back to the bed, laying me down, laying on top of me. Hands began to roam, moans were now coming from both of us, and Maureen was the furthest thing from my mind.

(Maureen's POV)

Since I came to New York, I have pretty much been a homebody, only leaving the apartment if I needed groceries and even then sometimes I'd just ordered in. I've been so depressed since hearing Joanne say she was choosing Kristin. A million times I wanted to pick up the phone and call her, but I'd get one number away from dialing her number and hang up, throw the phone, and cry for a couple hours.

I ran into Mark once. He offered to let me come stay with Cara and him, but I couldn't…they're getting ready to have a baby, they should be so happy and excited right now and they don't need overdramatic Maureen mopping around their apartment. I told him I'd call…I haven't yet.

My phone started ringing, but I didn't move from the couch. Figured I had an answering machine, if it was important they'd leave a message or I'd run and pick it up if I wanted to talk to them. Chances are I wouldn't though, I didn't want to talk to anyone.

"Hey Maureen, it's Mark," I could hear the disappointment in his voice that I hadn't picked up, "but hey I know that someone has a birthday coming up and Cara and I would love to plan something for you…nothing major, maybe just dinner…the three of us. Let me know ok. And hey Maureen…it'll be ok, I promise."

I'm glad he thought it would be ok; but I knew different. Nothing would ever be the same. And is he serious a birthday party? I don't want to celebrate anything right now; no reason to. I used to love birthdays, but not the past few years. Birthdays were always so special for Joanne and me and once we broke up I couldn't bring myself to celebrate my birthday; or at least to make a big deal out of it.

I pulled the blanket over myself, cuddling up into a little on the end of couch. And sat alone in a silent apartment, left only with my memories of how great things used to be in my life and how I royally screwed things up. My life could be so much different right now…who knows where'd I'd be, but I do know at least I'd be with Joanne.

I miss her…

I need her…

I love her…

ok so what do you think? hope you enjoy, please review, and thanks for reading!