Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter...still. It belongs to J.K Rowling.
Chapter Three: Mixed Feelings
"Er, Lily, can I speak with you for a moment?" James timidly asked during lunch hour a few days later. Asking timidly was outside his character; he was usually an obnoxious prick. It must be pretty important, Lily thought, almost amused, still sitting on the grass.
"Fine." Lily replied, not to happy about being interrupted during a very important conversation with Ellie, Alice, and Marlene. The four girls had been sitting outside near the lake, soaking up the sun and talking about everything and anything when James had approached.
James wasn't being followed by any of his friends, which Lily found to be a little strange.
"Well, talk." Lily demanded, losing patients.
"I just wanted to talk to you for a moment. I was wondering when we could, you know, get together. We have to come up with a patrolling schedule and what not for Professor McGonagall by the end of this week." James said, looking at her inquisitively. Lily wasn't looking at her friends, but she knew they would be passing looks between them.
"Um, yeah we can do it after supper tonight," Lily replied, taking back by the way James was talking to her. Why is he acting so nervous? She thought in wonderment.
"Great," he grinned.
"Po- James this isn't a date." She said frowning, hoping that he wasn't using their Head Duties as an excuse to tell all his friends he had a date with her, and convincing her own friends that she wasn't agreeing to go on a date with James Potter. The very thought made her squirm.
"I know," James replied, his smile faltering a little. "Well, see you then I suppose." Lily watched him walk back towards the castle before turning to her friends, who all had annoying knowing smirks on their faces.
"Admit it," Ellie yawned, "you like him. We're all getting sick of this soap opera crap. Just go out with him already." Lily glared at her, silencing the rest of her friends from even opening their mouths.
James felt like punching himself in the head, he couldn't believe he allowed himself to look so… excited about working with Lily. It would be time alone with her, he reminded himself, time to get to know her…
Though he didn't really feel like coming up with a patrolling schedule, James wanted to spend time with Lily. It would give him the opportunity to show her he had changed. Usually, Lily spent her evenings in the library studying, then she would come back to the Heads Quarters and go straight to bed. James was often practising Quidditch with his team, who he was captain of and had been captain of since his fifth year at Hogwarts. He had been on the team since his first year, and when he got back from practising he too went straight to bed.
"Prongs, how did it go? Did she scream at you?" Sirius questioned when James approached the Marauders. He had left them sitting under their favourite tree, Sirius flirting with a bunch of sixth years, Remus reading some book, and Peter watching Sirius as if Sirius owned the world. That was often how Peter behaved though, and they had all gotten used to it.
"We're meeting after supper, but she claims it's not a date," James said, a bemused look on his face as if Lily's suggestion was absurd.
"Then it's not a date," Remus said wisely from behind the book his was reading. James shot him a glare.
"It is, she just doesn't know it is." James shot back, throwing himself on the ground beside Sirius, who had long since stopped flirting with the sixth year girls.
"I bet you asked her to do some sort of Head Duty thing," Remus said, smiling. James rolled his eyes.
"Yes, only because it needs to be done, but it is the opportune time to show her how much I've changed." James told them, running a hand through his hair.
"By actually helping her?" Sirius questioned, as James was insane, "That goes against everything us Marauders have worked for!"
"No it doesn't," James said, defending him self, "What goes against everything we Marauders have worked for is not having a prank within the first four days. It's nearly been a week boys, are we losing our touch?"
"No, we lost our Prongs to head boy!" Sirius shrilly stated, before breaking out in fake, unrealistic sobs. James rolled his eyes.
"You haven't lost me, I'm still here, waiting for an idea." James retorted, glancing at Remus expectantly.
"I have a good one actually," Remus said, leaning forward and dropping the book he had been reading.
"Wow, if people actually knew that you were mostly the brains of the operation, I wonder what would happen?" Sirius said, thinking.
"He'd lose that good boy image we hide behind!" Peter squeaked. James laughed.
"Or rather you hide behind. Anyway, let's hear it Moony!"
After supper, Lily sat in the Heads common room, mulling over a parchment of ideas with James. They had already prepared several copies of the Patrolling schedule, and were now working on events for the school.
"I think the first Hogsmeade date should be October 25th, so students have time to shop for the Samhain Ball." Lily commented, chewing on the end of her quill. James watched her, trying to hold back a smile. She looked so pretty, sitting there with her hair falling into her face and that look of complete 'No funny business James'.
"Yeah, that sounds good. What are you going as?" James questioned. As the Samhain Ball was held on Halloween, Lily had had the wonderful idea of everyone dressing up, like Muggles did on Halloween. All Lily's ideas are wonderful, James thought dreamily.
"I have no idea what I'm going as actually, we're focusing on Hogsmeade dates at the moment, then we'll deal with the planning of the Ball." Lily replied, all business. James nodded.
"I think the second Hogsmeade trip should be on December 20th, then all the students can get their shopping done." James suggested. Lily nodded, writing it down on the parchment with her perfect, neat writing.
"And that's all we need to do for now!" Lily exclaimed, dropping her quill and leaning back in her chair. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?" she added, annoyed when she noticed James staring at her with a stupid grin on his face.
"Sorry, it's hard not to, your just so beautiful." James replied, grinning. He said it in his usual confident voice, as if all the girls at school should be honoured that he was complimenting them.
Lily rolled her eyes and got up.
"I'm going to bed. Night." Lily stated, getting up. James frowned.
"Why do you always do that?" he questioned, standing up too.
"Do what?" she retorted, getting annoyed.
"Jump up or get mad whenever I compliment you!" James said, trying to hide the hurt. It was like Lily was disgusted to hear he thought she was beautiful.
"Maybe if you said it like you actually meant it instead of saying it in that obnoxious, full of yourself voice like I should be pleased that your saying it, I might be a little more flattered!" Lily retorted, her voice rising.
"I do mean it!" James replied, moving in closer to her.
Lily rolled her eyes again. "Oh really? Sometimes I think you only like me because of my looks! You don't know me at all!" she said before storming off to her room, leaving James looking very confused and startled.
Lily slammed her door, leaning against it and rubbing her temple, which was now throbbing painfully.
What was that all about? Lily questioned herself, confused at the words that had come out of her mouth. She had no idea what to think anymore, did she really mean what she said? Was she really upset that James Potter didn't mean it when he complimented her? No! A little voice said, colliding with the small yes.
Lily slowly walked over to her bed and lied down, still mulling over the little episode.
James was thinking about it too as he lay in his own bed in his own room. He was confused about what Lily had said, she had sounded as if she was really truly upset that he didn't mean it when he complimented her, and he did. She probably thinks I'm only saying those things to 'get what I want' James thought regretfully. He admitted to himself that she was partly right. Though he meant what he said with all his heart, his tone said otherwise.
Does she actually like me? James thought, a little bubble of confused hope rising in his chest.
No, thought Lily weakly, having asked herself the same question, At least, I don't think so…
The next morning at breakfast, Lily hardly said a word to James. Alice, Ellie and Marlene all looked at her questionably, as Lily and James usually held some sort of conversation. They also noticed that the Marauders, who usually sat beside them (because James liked Lily and Remus was dating Marlene) were now seated farther away then usual.
"What happened Lily?" Marlene questioned, somewhat confused by her usually chatty friends silence.
"Oh nothing," Lily replied, sighing. "I have to go to the library and finish the essay on the Snarfwizzlemonkey for Care of Magical Creatures." The Snarfwizzlemonkey was a strange looking monkeyish creature with several different qualities that separated it from the monkey family.
Ellie giggled, "I can't believe there's a creature called Snarfwizzlemonkey, whoever discovered it must have had a peanut butter and crack sandwich." Lily smiled weakly while Marlene and Alice burst out laughing with Ellie. She pushed away her plate and got up, grabbing her bag and making her way through the crowded hall.
James watched her go with a confused and sad look on his face.
"Prongs, are you going to tell me what happened last night or am I just going to have to assume you're a terrible shag mate?" Sirius demanded, stuffing his face full of bacon and eggs.
"I think Lily's mad because when I compliment her, I say it in an 'obnoxious, full of myself' voice." James replied, turning back to his friends and looking very confused. Remus, who had been looking wistfully down at the other end of the table at Marlene, turned back and looked at James.
"What?" Sirius demanded, his jaw dropping open in disbelief. "That makes no sense at all! What is she looking for reasons to be mad at you or something?"
"I think that's not the real reason," Remus said wisely, pondering. James, looking very confused now, looked at Remus.
"Then what's the real reason Moony? And when did you become such an expert on the girls mind?" James questioned.
"Since he got a girlfriend, duh," Sirius said in a terrible impression of a valley girl voice as he rolled his eyes. Remus and James ignored him while Peter laughed in his high pitched, squeaky laugh.
"Anyway, I think she's confused." Remus told James.
"Confused about what?" James asked, growing more confused as the seconds passed. She's not the only one confused, James thought, scratching his head.
"About her feelings for you."
WhiteCamellia: I am really glad you like it so far! Keep reading and I'll keep updating ;)